What was the hardest physical/legal decision you had to make in your transition?

[Nero]

hey guys and dolls,

What was the hardest physical/legal decision you had to make in your transition?
(Concerning actual transition details, not counting family or other social aspects.)

Elaboration encouraged.
Thanks!

[LordKAT]

I;m still debating on the bottom surgery question. I still have time to do that since I get T in 2 weeks and top surgery in December barring any money issues before then.

[Chamillion]

Whether or not to go on hormones.  At first I wanted T, then I decided I was comfortable enough the way I was and decided against it, then after a lot of self-reflecting I realized that I needed to go on it.  It took over a year for me to make the final decision.  I think this also relates to the first option though, whether or not to transition, since I related going on T with actually transitioning

[myles]

I think for me it's the bottom surgery. The T and top surgery were less of a concern, after reading as much as I could about both  it was easy to make a decision. Bottom surgery is harder, less info out there as far as photos I've seen I like, success stories and so on. There are some but just not as many as I would like.
Myles

[Flan]

My problem was simply starting. I tried to sweep it under the rug and deny it for too long after I was first diagnosed with "GID", but after that, things got less gloomy.

[Arch]

My problem was simply starting. I tried to sweep it under the rug and deny it for too long after I was first diagnosed with "GID", but after that, things got less gloomy.

I was sort of in the same boat. Came out as transgender about fifteen years before I started my medical transition. And I knew about FTMs for five years before I came out as transgender, but I really couldn't handle that knowledge and spent the five years cross dressing.

Deciding to transition may well be the hardest choice I've ever made in my life, but I saw death as pretty much the only way out. And I didn't want to die. So...here I am.

[Ms.Behavin]

Other!!!. Just getting the strength to be me.  That took a long time.  I always knew what I wanted, but fear stopped me.  That was by far the hardest part.  Once I started down the path I went skipping and jumping and VA LA  here I am. 

Beni

[Christo]

Name & bottom surgery. Chose Chris b/c thats the dude's version of my birth name & I dont wanna take any chances w/bottom surgery. dont need a dick 2 be a dude eitther 

[Northern Jane]

The hardest thing for me was surviving until SRS became available.

I started HRT (intermittently and illegally) about age 14 (early 1960's) and lived part of my teens en femme (though it wasn't allowed at home). By 19 I knew I needed to be fully and functionally female to go any farther in life but there was no surgery available (except at ridiculously high cost). By 24 the suicide attempts were VERY serious and I told my doctor I wasn't going to see 25. I wouldn't have either if Dr. Biber hadn't rescued me.

Surviving age 19 to 24 was by far the hardest thing I have ever done and I wouldn't wish that  kind of life on my  worst enemy!

[Miniar]

I consider the HRT the hard choice actually, because, when I made the decision to pursue it.
See, the choice to get the T came with other implied choices.. I knew that if I did "this" than "that" would follow.

[K8]

I think starting was the hardest part for me.  (I did wait a loooong time. ) 

When I finally began coming out to everyone (including myself), I was determined not to do anything I couldn't reverse if I wanted to go back.  I didn't view laser and electrolysis as irreversable because plenty of people who present male are clean-shaven.  I realized going on hormones would result in irreversible changes, but they would take a while so I could still back out if I felt I needed to.  Scheduling GRS was also reversible because I could cancel the appointment.

Of course now, having had a taste of what it is like to live as the real, complete me, there is no way I'm going back, so that's no longer a concern.

- Kate

[LordKAT]

Never considered not transitioning as an option once I knew it was possible. choices in bottom surgery and bad results so far are keeping me questioning and searching.

[FairyGirl]

Aside from that, I have never had any doubts about anything really except perhaps when I had to choose my SRS surgeon.  I mean let's face it, Dr. Meltzer, Dr. Bowers, Dr. Brassard, Dr. Suporn (and now Dr. McGinn) are the best of the best in MTF SRS.  Who wouldn't have doubts selecting just one of them?

I certainly had mine, and which surgeon was the option I chose. Once I began transitioning there became little doubt I was going all the way. Cost wasn't really a deciding factor, but skill, patient reviews, and proximity to my home base were. I've tentatively chosen Dr. McGinn because of those reasons.

[sneakersjay]

Bottom surgery.

I could say the decision to transition, but pretty much once I realized it was an option, it didn't take long to go from no way can I do that to jumping off the cliff with both feet.  It just took me longer than most to discover what, exactly, my problem was.  Never would have guessed that 'transsexual' was the label I was looking for.  Still don't like that word, because it brings up images of what we are NOT.


Jay

[lisagurl]

Divorce

[pretty pauline]

whether or not to have the final surgery, my Mother played a big part in my decision, I was very nevious on the approaching surgery, 2 of my 3 brothers supported the family decision for me to take that final step, when I did there was no going back.
2years after that, my 3rd brother finally excepted me as a girl, my painful transition was now complete.
p

[Janet_Girl]

For me, it is the whole surgeon thing.  Not having the funds, right now, price is a major factor.  But so is appearance, function and depth.  There are so many good surgeons out there it is hard to choose.

Making the decision to transition was never a big deal, nether was HRT.  Divorce was just part of the deal.  She never did understand.  My name has been with me for a long time and I could not wait to change it.

I am so ready for SRS that I would be gone if not for the funds.

Janet

[Alyssa M.]

Decision to transition.

It took me a long time to become convinced that transition was viable, satisfactory, affordable, and something I could handle. Since starting, everything else has been a lot easier.

[cindianna_jones]

Family and social obstacles were the ONLY problems I faced.  Nothing else held me back to any great degree.

I started with nothing and still managed to pay for child support and afford surgery.  I don't know how I did it but the drive was so strong, nothing could stop me.

Cindi

[sd]

Family and social obstacles were the ONLY problems I faced.  Nothing else held me back to any great degree.

I think that it will be the same for me.