Mannerism: HOW to behave as a natal assigned female and not AMAB Trans?

[K8]

One huge thing is to remember is that you are not required to "act" like a man anymore, which is something most all men are constantly conscious of, lest other men think they're being "sissy" or god forbid "gay". Once you realize you're a woman and it's okay to give up pretending to be a man, the rest will pretty much come naturally.

I certainly hear you here, FairyGirl.  I found that once I relaxed into being Kate, I often walk with my wrists cocked back a little - my arms down but my hands out.  I'm very comfortable that way and have no idea if it is femminine, but I know it isn't masculine.  (I was told not to do it often enough when young. )

Walking from the hips gives you a little bit of a wiggle, also definitely not masculine.

BTW, when I presented male everyone (except me) accepted me as a man.  But when I came out to my friends, two different ones told me they had been with a friend of theirs who didn't know me when they had seen me at a distance.  When they said something like: Oh, there's *old name* their friend had said: Oh, I thought that was a woman.  No wonder I used to get beaten up years ago when I was trying to be a boy.

- Kate

[maidenprincess]

I agree with the others who said to hang out with genetic women.  You'll get the hang of it!

[DragonGirl]

I also got a lot of info from Lucille Sorella and in 2 months increased 1 cup size and picked up a lot of info from speech coaches to movement professionals. Works for me. Just google.     

[EmilyMI]

Thanks for all the great tips and I will defiantly take these to heart.  I have tried to mimic from what I seen in malls and what not, so far it is not helping but I think I just need to work on it constantly.  I know for sure my posture I need to work on, also work with my shoulders and keep them how they are suppose to be compared to a CIS Woman.  I do slouch quite a bit still right now which I am trying to work on, but that is a hard habit to break.  I am 5' - 10" right now without heels so I am not terribly out of the norm compared to CIS Woman.  I have a few Woman in our office that is quite a bit taller then me and are very feminine.  I am trying to work on my weight right now, I am a size 8 right now so not terrible but I would like to get more fit.  Another issue of mine is not being confident, I do have body dysmorphia  and I am always NOT happy with how I look and just incredibly critical about myself, hence the reason why I have very little self-confidence right now.  I am trying to work on this but again it is incredibly hard to see something good about yourself when you hate everything that you see starting back at you in the mirror.   

[Brooke777]

I am trying to work on this but again it is incredibly hard to see something good about yourself when you hate everything that you see starting back at you in the mirror.   [/font]

I know this feeling all to well. It really is a hard thing to overcome. I am sure you will be successfull. I wish you the best of luck.

[EmilyMI]

I know this feeling all to well. It really is a hard thing to overcome. I am sure you will be successfull. I wish you the best of luck.

Thanks and yes it is, I am working on a daily basis and is a constant struggle for me.  Trying to change in how you see yourself is incredibly hard and to stay positive is sometimes even harder. 

[Brooke777]

Thanks and yes it is, I am working on a daily basis and is a constant struggle for me.  Trying to change in how you see yourself is incredibly hard and to stay positive is sometimes even harder.

Just by your avatar picture, you are beautiful. Give it some more time and you will start to see it. I never thought I would see a girl when I looked in the mirror. But, I was wrong. Last week I looked in the mirror and saw a woman staring back at me. Mind you, I haven't seen her again and I'm back to not liking what I see. I do know that some day I will only see the woman I am and I will be happy for that.

[EmilyMI]

Just by your avatar picture, you are beautiful. Give it some more time and you will start to see it. I never thought I would see a girl when I looked in the mirror. But, I was wrong. Last week I looked in the mirror and saw a woman staring back at me. Mind you, I haven't seen her again and I'm back to not liking what I see. I do know that some day I will only see the woman I am and I will be happy for that.

Thanks for the compliment, it does help me with my confidence and shows that I am moving in the right direction (even though I do not see it).  I know I am VERY hard of myself most of the time, maybe I just need to trust what others say and just not let my fear get the better of me. 

[Dahlia]

Easy. Unlearn all your masculine walking, moving, etc instead of trying to learn feminine ones.

It's gonna look like your acting and besides that downright silly....when people see your bodylanguage conflicting....masculine trying to be feminine.

[K8]

Easy. Unlearn all your masculine walking, moving, etc instead of trying to learn feminine ones.

This is what worked for me.  It is easier said than done, but if you can relax into your new persona you may find that you naturally move in a feminine way.  Growing up male, we get all these messages on how to walk and sit and act so that we don't look like a girl.  It can be hard to let all of that early training go, but if you can you may find that your natural movement is more feminine.

- Kate

[SashaHyde]

Late to this forum but as I'm new (green) reading it will benefit me also. I would venture a guess much would come second nature over time with hrt AND watching and emulating other women. Things I've already started working on is relaxing the shoulders and back, and walking from my pelvis not my chest.
Part of my issue is fighting a lot of muscle mass. I'm targeting my muscles to relax more but I believe hrt will over time soften my gait.
Maybe i'm wrong and if I am then working on the tings I can now will help me down the road.

--Sasha

[josie76]

One of the biggest things you can do is just relax. I know that sounds hard but when you let go of all the hang ups you were taught not to be like growing up and relax, things tend to be naturally there. Be expressive but not on purpose. Let your face show your emotions. It will become so natural you won't know you are doing it. Talking with your hands is a plus if it is natural for you. I had to always keep hand talking in check. Sometimes I would get a weird look from some guy and I'd put my hands in my pockets after that. For me, just relaxing the mental reflex to "don't do that" allowed me to just be me. I'm sure I studied my mom and grandma growing up. I spent a lot of time with both. I have also always observed people. How they act and interact. Much of that was seeing how not to act so as not to get beat up so its just stopping that reaction that will make it all happen for you.