Who to see and What to ask.

[Key]

Seeing as I have only recently come to the realization that I am trans, I'm having a bit of trouble figuring out the steps getting to therapy, and what I should be speaking with them on.  I know I'm trans, I shouldn't have to get professional approval, but then again that's the world.

So it comes down to this.  I have 3 options when it comes to therapy.  The first, would be to see my christian councilor.  This one however is the least favorite of my options.  The second would be to see a therapist I have seen since I was in 4th grade (Note that I'm 21 now)  she pretty much knows me better than I know myself in some cases (treated me for possible ADD, turrets, needle phobia, etc).  The other option is to find a completely new therapist to speak to.  A little input into this would be helpful, from those of you who have the experience. 

The other thing is really, what should I be asking, what should the therapist be asking, what should I be looking for in this Therapy?  I'm a bit confused, and I don't really know where to start.

Help would be wonderful.

~Key~

[myles]

Greetings-
I am not sure what you are looking for so there are a few options. If you want to go on hormones you will want to make sure you have/pick a therapist who can write a letter for your doc to get the hormones. I would go for a gender therapist if you can find one or ask a regular therapist if they have dealt with people and GID. I know my regular therapist was not able to help me on either account so I found a new therapist for gender stuff. Others have had a fine time with therapist they are already seeing so I think it depends on what you are hoping for in the end. Another thing I had to take into consideration was in my state I needed a letter from a therapist to change my gender on my DL and they only have a list of 10-12 that they accept letters from. So I would check out what it is you are looking for in the end and go from there.
Cheers, and Welcome

Myles

[Key]

Well, I am looking to start on HRT, but I'm also looking for someone to speak to on the issue of coming out to the family, and pretty much everything else I've been feeling about thi.

[LordKAT]

A gender therapist is an excellent place to start. They can help with coming out issues and how to deal with the various things that happen when you do as well as write letters that we want.

[K8]

Hi Key.  If you are still seeing the therapist that knows you, start with her.  (Maybe start with her even if you aren't still seeing her regularly.)  I was seeing a therapist about other issues and, as those became resolved, I moved on to my gender issues.  We already had a good realtionship, and I think that made things a lot easier for both of us.

As to what to say, I would avoid immediately asking for hormones (but that's just me ).  Tell your therapist about your feelings and why you think (know) you are trans.  If you can explain it to them, they will trust your knowing more than if you can't.

You may have good luck with a Christian counselor - my minister has been wonderful for me - but I wouldn't rely on him/her.   Their focus is often different from what you are looking for here, and some (but certainly not all) have very rigid views that are not helpful.

- Kate

[Key]

Hi Key.  If you are still seeing the therapist that knows you, start with her.  (Maybe start with her even if you aren't still seeing her regularly.)  I was seeing a therapist about other issues and, as those became resolved, I moved on to my gender issues.  We already had a good realtionship, and I think that made things a lot easier for both of us.

As to what to say, I would avoid immediately asking for hormones (but that's just me ).  Tell your therapist about your feelings and why you think (know) you are trans.  If you can explain it to them, they will trust your knowing more than if you can't.

You may have good luck with a Christian counselor - my minister has been wonderful for me - but I wouldn't rely on him/her.   Their focus is often different from what you are looking for here, and some (but certainly not all) have very rigid views that are not helpful.

- Kate

Yeah, the thing I don't want from my Christian councilor is him telling me it's a problem with myself.  I already get told that on other matters that are opposite what he says, I don't think I need that.  How would one go about finding a gender therapist?  Would say, seeing the therapist I know, and asking her perhaps for someone she knows be a good idea?  I think now I'm pretty solid that I'll go see her as soon as I can scoop the money for a payment (insurance doesn't cover her.)

[myles]

There is a section on the front of this site that has a link to therapists. I also still see a general therapist on occasion (as she is covered by my insurance and my gender therapist is not) but she could not write me a letter for HRT, and was not on the approved list for the DMV to change my DL.This is a state by state thing though as every state has different regulations on changing your gender n your DL .
Myles

[K8]

she could not write me a letter for HRT, and was not on the approved list for the DMV to change my DL.This is a state by state thing though as every state has different regulations on changing your gender n your DL.

BTW, my state won't change the DL gender marker without a surgeon's letter.  For MtF it has to be GRS; I'm not sure about FtM.

I would ask the therapist you know and trust for a referral.

- Kate

[Key]

Ok ^^  I'm sure she would know the people I should see beyond her.