Now. I decided to wait until I'd get a go ahead for the physical transition before I had this conversation with Hafdís because I wanted to know change was expected before warning my daughter about changes.
Having been given the word I decided I'd have to have this conversation. That is to say, explain what "trans" is to my daughter, let her know I am one, and let her know that I'll be having some "medicine" soon.
She's got "probably aspergers" and so it's important not to shake up her world too much, so I was nervous, but it went just fine.
I started out by asking her if she were a boy or a girl. Poorly thought out maybe cause she looked at me like I was insane and said "girl". So I asked her "how do you know?", to which she eyerolled at me and said "because I'm a girl!"
We carried on the conversation for a little bit, and we discussed whether her mind was a boy or a girl, as well as whether or not her body was a girl, and then I told her that there are people who have the mind of a girl even if their body is a boy and I asked her, if the mind is a girl and the body is a boy is the person a boy or a girl? She stopped and thought for a while and then said "a girl ofcourse". The "ofcourse" made me smile.
I explained that there were people with a boy mind and a girl body, and according to her, those people are obviously boys.
I then told her "I'm a boy", and she said "that's a little strange, you're my mom!" So the only "problem" in her mind was that boys aren't moms. I explained that the body is still a girl, so I can be her mom, but I'm a boy, and I have to fix my body now with some medicine so that I can "feel better".
I told her that it's not gonna change that she's my little girl and that I'll always be her mom and so on, she gave me a hug and that was that.
"simple" really...
It's amazing how simple it is to children, the stuff that gets in the way of adults.
