Transexuals and Second Puberty

[brina]

Hiee,

  I have never seen a topic about TS's and the genetic puberty they went thru as growing children. I am thinking that both F->M's and M->F's could gain useful information with a question and answer format. I realize that this could be painful for some with extreme GID but perhaps they could avoid the particular thread. Feed back please.

Byee,
  Brina

[Steph]

Hiee,

  I have never seen a topic about TS's and the genetic puberty they went thru as growing children. I am thinking that both F->M's and M->F's could gain useful information with a question and answer format. I realize that this could be painful for some with extreme GID but perhaps they could avoid the particular thread. Feed back please.

Byee,
  Brina

I didn't know there were different levels of GID?  How would one know if they had "extreme" GID as opposed to lets say "mild" GID?

Steph

[brina]

Hiee Steph,

  I guess I am refering to those idividuals who you see talking about self mutilation of thier genitals or the big 'S' as they can no longer stand living the way they do. To me if they are SINCERE in that they are writting that would seem to be accute GID. Speaking for myself, I guess I have lived with it for my pretty much entire life, although I had no idea that I was. I have made 2 attempts over the years to 'Punch my Ticket' so to speak and if one were to dig deep enough then perhaps it could be traced to being GID, I really don't know nor do I think it matters now days. When I realized that I was in fact TS it was a relief even though there was a mild attempt at denial again.

  When I finally came around it turned out NOT to be such a big deal after all. I had some problems in getting started mostly due to my own ignorance and not having any place to turn to for reliable information or proffesionals to see. So for me to talk or answer quesitons about going thru puberty as a male is not a problem, whereas, for someone who is accute GID I could see it being problematic.
That was all I was attempting to ask here.

Byee,
  Brina

[Ricki]

Brina i'll try i hope i understand what you are asking?
I went through i guess a male puberty and the hormonal changes i experienced were spikes in sexual desire, pimples, etc....  sounds ho-hummmmm
anyway as far as resenting my physique, hell yes i do and did i ever have  a thought about removing the evil thing between thy legs oh yes more than once younger years in life though older now and wiser and i realize that by doing that i would not be conforming my body to anything that i feel it is supposed to be! 
I mean you can cosmetically cut of a mole right, ya but; men and women get moles, who cares.. Cut off my thing well that scenario does not turn out good worst case scenario i have a cut off thing.......
I am not a masochist I mean dreaming of an accident that is beyond your control is one thing like maybe being in  a car accident where you lose it somehow?  So then what you say to a surgeon well Doc this is wonderful news cause really I am transgendered and just throw in a vagina for me?  i dunno the whole prospect is not good!
My issue with transforming is not that i know some things can be done surgically just not everything and in that lies the issues for me I cannot gentically make myself a 100% real woman and just know i would not be any happier than i am now...
So i pursue another frustrating road to try and find some happiness and wholeness in this life!
I hope i sort of answered or replied right?
ricki

[brina]

Hiee Ricki,

  LOL now even I am confused about what I was writting (laughing NOT). No what I was after and hoping or was that some of the F->M's would be willing to talk about their puberty and time frames of developement emotional things(may not be applicable being GID) etc etc.

Byee,
  Brina

[Dennis]

I don't remember much about the first puberty. I think I've blocked most of it. I just remember that no change was a welcome change and that I was lucky enough for it to start late (17), so I could continue to be a boy through most of high school. Then I developed ways of dressing to hide things like bumps and curves.

I also remember feeling so much different from girls who actually welcomed those sorts of changes and delighted in every one. I learned to mimic their conversations so I didn't look so out of place. Generally horrible. I don't recall any emotional changes other than just flat not liking what was happening. It wasn't a huge trauma because I was mature enough when it happened that I realized it was inevitable and that I just had to get used to it, but it was unpleasant and felt wrong.

My second puberty has been a riot though. I have energy, I count the sideburn hairs and look forward to the day when I can grow them. I love my bass voice.

Dennis

[Julie Marie]

I was either deep in denial or completely brainwashed, possbily both.  I developed like a normal boy except for my voice.  It went deep very early.  When I was with family or friends I put on the act.  When I was alone I wished something would happen to me to make me a girl.  I was so afraid someone would find out I went to great lengths to keep it hidden.  I look back and see I even kept it hidden from myself.  I didn't allow myself to think about it too much because I felt there was nothing I could do but wish and hope.

I never hated my male body but I never loved it.  Actually I never even liked it.  I felt I was stuck with it and that was that so I never really thought a whole lot about it, too depressing.

Julie

[Ricki]

oooops maybe i went into to too much?  I'm confused now too...
Course I am confused a lot of days!
ricki

[jonjon]

I cant say i remember much of it... Though i do remember wondering why certain things didn't go like every other girl had... >_> Such as hips and curves. I remember being in school one day and one of my class mates, Rachel, was showing off her growing hips... complaining she needed new trousers, yet at the same time discovering the kind of sex appeal effect it had on guys. I remember sitting and quietly hoping to myself that my hips didn't grow that much outwardly... and i'm thankful they didnt ^_^ And then when the girls began to grow breasts... i was most certainly the one left out there. While everyone was showing off their cleavage... i was struggling to find one lol But even though they didn't grow all that much... there were nights where i would lay awake and will them to be gone by the morning... sometimes i even cried myself to sleep with it... But i feel lucky that they never developed as much as everyone elses did and very thankful!

Funnily enough... this was about the time of my life i also caught myself staring at girls in ways i never thought i would... thinking to myself, i'm not a lesbian, i always looked away as soon as i realised.

[Luc]

Gah. I can't believe I'm doing this. Here goes.

First of all, Dennis, you're SO lucky not to have had to go through any of it until you were older. I started breast development at 8. Yes, 8. I really don't remember the emotional effects the hormones had on me, though, because throughout that entire time I was with every fibre of my being fighting the changes that were forced upon me. When I was 10, my mom tried her best to get me to wear a bra. Ugh. Didn't work. Then the whole menstruation bit hit at about 10 1/2... agony.

I do remember being a little more afraid of things. But that may just have been societal pressure. I was always the kid who would run through the woods and climb trees and play with snakes, etc... and around 11 I remember forsaking a bit of that. It was about that time, too, though, that my mom started really enforcing the "you're a GIRL!" bit. I remember my desire for girls increasing around that time, and also my agression. I'm thinking that's a little weird... but who knows. I got into a lot of fights around 11 and 12 (physical fights). Around 13, I settled down a bit... kind of reconciled myself to having to live as a girl, because as I saw it, there was no way around it. I started dating guys, though I had absolutely no physical attraction to them. My attraction to girls grew to the point that I started wondering if I was gay, though I knew there was no way I was a lesbian. I desperately wanted to join sports teams--- I loved hockey and soccer--- but those were girls-only. Blech. I joined the cross-country and track teams instead, and spent most of my time watching the other girls run.

Around 16, I started rebelling. Started wearing guys' clothing. Started telling my best friends I thought I was bi, even though I wasn't even sure of that. It took that long to get back to the point where I was prior to puberty. At 18, I was certain I was supposed to be a guy, and I learned about transsexualism, though I was too caught up in my own difficulties at the time to do anything about it. Now I'm 24. I have never been more certain that that horrible experience, going through puberty and trying to conform to society's norms of what I "should" be, was a big cosmic joke. But I'm doing something about it now.

Hope this helps, Brina. And anyone else who might read this post.

Rafe

[brina]

Hiee,

  I'd like to thank the guys who have posted to this thread as I have found your posts to be most interesting. Rafe i esphecially liked what you had to post. In some ways we paralelled each other but on differing sides of the fence so to speak. I don't think my inner image was as conflicted as what yours seems to have been, but on the other hand I pushed the envelope in my inquisitiveness. In looking back at my teen years I can say that it was all about validation for my inner self image yet conflicted with my outter image.
  Anyhows thanx for the post(s) guys .

Byee,
  Brina