Why would anyone want to be a woman when they could be a man?

[Megan]

I don't think you can list a reason because then you can just say, "Be a flamer to be more expressive". "Be yourself". "Don't care what other say".

It's not about being able to do certain things that women can only do, because it's just not true, you can do everything a woman can do as  a man. Sure majority will label you, but there will be people who will accept you especially in the gay realm. And as time going on, gender boundaries are getting less restricted.

So, the true reason to be a woman is because it is you. And you're just trying to piece the puzzle of you and make it all fit, without losing your sanity because your gender is what gives a foundation of your identity in this life.

I know who I am, but I am multi-dimensional (and I think a lot of other people are as well), so it's hard. I want to be a woman because I see myself as one, I want to live this life shaped as a woman since it's a better way of seeing things. I don't want to be in between male and female, but just female if I am female, which means I don't want to be transsexual since people won't accept me as a woman. While as a guy they will accept me being feminine, and think of me more as a woman. (You know what I am saying?) Like in their viewpoints they will think of a transsexual as a guy in a dress, while a gay guy as a sissy, which is more feminine than just being a guy in a dress.

So if I cannot be a woman, I would want to be an ultra feminine guy that is bending towards a woman, but at the same time male. But that cannot last forever, since age will make me more masculine as time goes on. So, it's like going back and forth with these identities (and they all are in my head) and I represent myself as the average male so far.

And given only 1 life, I want to make the best decisions since this could change me forever. I cannot go back, there's nothing bigger than changing your gender. With the exception of raising kids, I think this is the most profound way you can affect your life and the lives around you.

[Janet_Girl]

So many of us girls have answered.  But by replacing the pronouns and woman to man, I think things would fit for the guys too.



Hugs and Love
Janet

[insanitylives]

So many of us girls have answered.

I'm geniunly curious as to why...

[kimmie]

As a woman I am not expected to be tough and macho - though if I do occasionally choose to be I get extra kudos for it.

As a woman in a relationship I get to be a nurturing mother, probably the most important role on the planet.

As a woman I am allowed to cry and generally be slushy if want to.

As a woman I can talk about my feelings to my friends without getting funny looks.

As a woman I am more in touch with my feelings and inner self.

As a woman I will probably live longer.

As a woman I rarely have to get dirty changing a tyre on my vehicle. All I do is stand there looking helpless and some kind man get's dirty for me. 

As a woman I have a far better sexual responses and enjoyment. (Seriously, the first time I erm... hit the top after SRS it nearly blew my brains out! - I hope that isn't too graphic.)

As a woman my skin is softer and more sensitive, my eyesight is better and under the influence of estrogen my immune system functions better.

As a woman I can wear either female or male attire without anyone questioning me.

I could go on - but this is already way too long a list. I rest my case.

(well you did ask!) 

I love this post the one thing not sad is I can kiss my boy frind and no one look
   And the most inporting part I can be me

[Suzy]

To give a halfway serious answer....   Because the stress of trying to fit in and function as a man for decades has become so corrosive to my soul that I would rather die than continue as things are.  It is as tortuous as living as an expatriate but having to constantly view your homeland all around you.   Because the thought of dying one day as an old man is so disingenuous that it seems ludicrous. 

On a more positive note, I do love the power a smile (or just a tiny bit more) can have over a guy.  Men do not have anything akin to this kind of charm, and I am convinced it is the power that makes the world turn.

Kristi

[Megan]

This is an old song, but I feel like this when I am thinking about transitioning.

[Renate]

I don't know.
Being a woman is just a better fit for me.
I like being open, feeling other people's emotions, looking them in the eye.
I like wandering and looking at everything with the naivete of a 3 year-old.
I like not worrying about being a doofus, which is my true identity.

[Jillieann Rose]

Kristi put it better than I could

To give a halfway serious answer....   Because the stress of trying to fit in and function as a man for decades has become so corrosive to my soul that I would rather die than continue as things are.  It is as tortuous as living as an expatriate but having to constantly view your homeland all around you.   Because the thought of dying one day as an old man is so disingenuous that it seems ludicrous. 

I so much agree.

And we can wear silk pink apparel.   
Jillieann

[Hannah]

Honestly, some days I don't even want to be a human. Especially during these cold months I think i'd rather be a mushroom and just stay under my quilts in the warm darkness. I was holding a dog last night and actually found myself envious of him, the way he felt so relaxed and safe is something I've never experienced.

[Lachlann]

Only semi-seriously, why would anyone want to be a woman when they could be a man? 

Well, Nero, you see there needs to be someone I can oogle at and men just don't do it for me. Is that a good enough answer? 

[Janet_Girl]

Well, Nero, you see there needs to be someone I can oogle at and men just don't do it for me. Is that a good enough answer? 

And that is why man was made.    Sugar.


Hugs and Love
Janet

[Alyx.]

The funny thing is, I was thinking about this before, as in "Why would anyone want to be a man when they can be a woman?" and I was thinking about posting it here, but I was afraid of being flamed to death.

[Alyssa M.]

Oy vey, straight people.   

Okay, I'll try to answer the question. Once upon a time, say, several months ago and stretching back a long time, I wanted to be a woman. I'm not really sure why. I guess it had something to do with being allowed to express emotions more, to do girly things without being seen as peculiar, etc. Most importantly, to be able to have relationships with other women without the interference of the gender barrier.

Now I don't see any particular benefit. It's just a way to be, and the way I am. I guess you could say my dreams have lost some grandeur coming true. I mean, if you were Joni Mitchell, you might say that. But, damn, it's good to quit playing a role I wasn't any good at.

Of course, some people might still think it's better to be a man. Fine, I wouldn't know. But it seems to me the only reason anyone thinks that is because of patriarchal notions that still pervade our society. I don't see how it makes a difference. Besides peeing standing up, women can do literally everything a man can do. Besides giving birth and breastfeeding, men can do everything women can do. Some things women do better (on average), and some things men. But most of life isn't a competition, thank goodness; if it were, almost everybody would lose, male or female, and the question wouldn't matter anyway.

[Tammy Hope]

ok - a personal answer and then a general theorem

For my own internal processing, it's not so much wanting to be, as not wanting to be. I can think of almost any trait, physical or attitude wise, that is characteristically "male" and the idea that I might be that is repulsive to me.

I know that I'm playing into, maybe a victim of, stereotypical thinking in some of these, but it's a visceral reaction...

I want to be soft, not hard
i want to be weak, not strong
I want to be gentle, not aggressive
I want to be submissive, not dominant
I want to be small and petite, not big and broad
I want to be curvy, not angular....

I could go on and on. when I walk through the store or the mall and i look at the men and women around me I can't even get past this line of thought to get down to what I'm sexually attracted to - I just see a guy of any age, in a suit or in overalls, looking dapper or dirty...and my heart says "I don't want to look like that!!"
and I see a woman, of any age and almost any shape (I confess that the more masculine women kind of trip the breakers a bit) and whether she's a bare-midrift teenybopper or a soccer mom or a graceful older lady I...resonate...with that persons appearance and conduct and mannerisms and all the rest.

In fact, when I force myself through all the fog and really look hard at my sexuality, it's so weird that I can't remember the last time I look at a good looking woman and thought to myself "man i'd like to ____ her!" even though I recognize, on an intellectual level, that she is sexually desirable.
On the other hand,i can imagine myself easily as the sort of woman who is quite promiscuous and insatiable when it comes to sex with guys even though when I look at them (now) I don't really see what there is to be attracted to (not to say that I can't call a good looking man a good looking man...for a man)

I here my sisters sometimes, in other forums, talking about hooking up with this guy or that and I think "damn that sounds like a lot of fun!" but yet I don't find myself looking at guys normally, when I'm not dwelling on my sexuality, in that context.

anyway, that's a pretty huge tangent I guess but what I'm getting at is that all these feelings are instinctive, visceral. When Nero asks "why wouldn't anyone want to be a guy?" the very things he's seeing as advantages are in fact the very things which repel me.

Now, maybe I'm presuming too much to extrapolate these things to a general hypothesis but here goes:

I would suggest that the reason we want to be women is because by nature's designs, men and women respond to and crave different stimuli, different interactions with the world around us.

The very things that are seen, in the abstract, as "male advantage" are the things that are stimuli that the "normal" man responds to. And having female minds, they don't impress us at all.

And the same applies in reverse - the things our female mind craves as stimuli can't be found in the male world, but those things are repulsive to those of you born female in form but male in your thinking.

you crave the very stimuli that I and my sisters recoil from.

we can no more understand the "why?" for each other than a cis person could understand either of us. We just have the experiences which equip us to accept the validity of each other's respective difficulty.

[Silver]

I have learned, finally, that some really do want to be women and don't understand why I am not happy with "what god gave me".

It seems basic, but I thought everyone would rather be a guy and just "settled" for being a woman. Not true I guess.

I don't see how it makes a difference. Besides peeing standing up, women can do literally everything a man can do. Besides giving birth and breastfeeding, men can do everything women can do. Some things women do better (on average), and some things men. But most of life isn't a competition, thank goodness; if it were, almost everybody would lose, male or female, and the question wouldn't matter anyway.

I really like the way you look at it.

[Dana_W]

Umm... Can I add a little sanity back to this debate? Have we all suddenly forgotten that boys are icky?! 

(Diana: proudly reliving my childhood since... well childhood probably. But I never got to do it properly, so there!)

[Silver]

Umm... Can I add a little sanity back to this debate? Have we all suddenly forgotten that boys are icky?! 

(Diana: proudly reliving my childhood since... well childhood probably. But I never got to do it properly, so there!)

But you girls have cooties! Is that not infinitely worse?

[Janet_Girl]

Umm... Can I add a little sanity back to this debate? Have we all suddenly forgotten that boys are icky?!

Since WHEN? 


Hugs and Love
Janet

[V M]

But you girls have cooties! Is that not infinitely worse?

Well yes, that's because guys tend to mistake cooties for cookies and always want some 

[LordKAT]

Well yes, that's because guys tend to mistake cooties for cookies and always want some 

If you look anything like the pic in my mind from the personality in your posts,  with or without a cookie, Ye i want some.


What did ya expect?