Overacting?

[Ms Bev]

Damned if I know, dude.  I don't worry about it, hon.




Bev

[Laura91]

 

[Silver]

Hmm. . . well I use dude in real life, because I pretty much always have because my father used to say it a lot.

About the forum, I don't think I act here. But if you think I do, it's probably because I'm insecure in my masculinity.

[Lachlann]

*shrug* I've always talked this way. And I know guys who talk the same way as me.

[Cindy]

I do use Hon, Guy, dude etc.

I have never thought I was acting. I do this in life, I tend to call the males in my work place (if not using their proper names) matey and the females Hun. Nothing meant by it.

Have to admit never really thought about it. Yes I'm sensitive to pronouns, but so what?

I also tend to use colloquialisms for people who are friends, because they are friends.


Ok Hun?
Cindy

[Christo]

Damned if I know, dude.  I don't worry about it, hon.




Bev

I use "bro" & "man" a lot. 

[Luna!]

I use 'guy' sometimes; it's generally used like most people tend to use it, as a generalization for a group of people. Everyone is a potential guy when grouped, even a group full of girls. I don't mind being called a guy (provided they're referring to the collective I am in) for the same reason.

Also, I tend to use 'guy' to refer to someone who did something irksome that I never actually saw the face of. But I tend to classify all such people as men by default anyways, so... Yeah. ^_^

[Miniar]

I absolutely feel that some transfolk can find themselves overcompensating for their biological problem, at least earlier on (during transition for instance).
I've got the luck of having a partner that pokes me, in the bloody ribs!, and lets me know when he sees me doing some "out of character" male posturing... and it does happen at the very least once or twice a month. (I'm sure it would happen a lot more often if he were on this forum too, and I've told him he can come hang out here, but he just doesn't have anything to say so... )

The thing is.. I'm not aware of it, not consciously anyhow, until pointed out. And once pointed out, I feel a little silly about it since, well, Men come in all sizes, colours, and flavours! Why would I feel the need to fulfill an out of character role to be one?

[placeholdername]

I don't really use the 'hun' or similar words because it doesn't really fit my personality.

[aerosolchild]

This is something I've noticed in other communities more than this one, actually... It reminds me of a phenomenon in the gay community connected to coming out. It's usually called gay puberty, although that can refer to other things and there are lots of names for it. My friend john (who is gay) used to call it "gay-vomiting," which is kind of gross, but I guess it's descriptive.

Essentially what happens is the in-the-closet gay person stuffs down their gay-ness. All the little traits and mannerisms that are natural to them and could be stereotyped as "gay" are hidden and stuffed in a corner, then freed when they come out. Because they've been shoved aside for so long, these traits take the forefront for a short period of time and push *other* traits aside. This usually doesn't last too long, (mine lasted about a month) and when they settle back down they're a more whole and balanced person.

This doesn't happen for everyone of course, but it definitely happens a lot

I don't think this is exactly the same, but there seems to be an interesting cycle of repression/self expression/self discovery going on.

[The None Blonde]

I've noticed with a lot of people on this forum that they talk funny, depending on thier gender idenity.

The females on this site seem to act like a stereotypical woman, with all the "Hun"s and all the "Girl" and putting people of the other gender down.

The males seems to do the opposite, acting also stereotypical, saying things like "Dude" and other male slang.

They both seem to fling this around more then the average male or female on the internet, so much so that it seems like acting. I wonder why that is? I find this fustrating.

Why do you guys do this? As I said, this isn't typical behavior, and I assume some thought is going into it, conscious or not.

Well, what do you guys think?

(Disclaimer: I am not attacking your gender idenity)

You pretty much have it right... Its insecurity, and trying to be 'most male or most female' to validate themselves against eachother.

It is a little odd.... considering 30-40yo women are going 'hon and girl' and 'like awesome' and acting like 13 yearolds... The dude comments from guys is less steriotypical...


However the 'putting the other gender down' bit im not sure about.. We do it a lot at uni... its fun to chat behind guys backs... though some here may not notice its in jest.

[Janet_Girl]

You pretty much have it right... Its insecurity, and trying to be 'most male or most female' to validate themselves against eachother.

It is a little odd.... considering 30-40yo women are going 'hon and girl' and 'like awesome' and acting like 13 yearolds... The dude comments from guys is less steriotypical...


However the 'putting the other gender down' bit im not sure about.. We do it a lot at uni... its fun to chat behind guys backs... though some here may not notice its in jest.

Aboslutly NOT.  It is called puberty, we all get to go through a second one, regardless of age.

[The None Blonde]

It is?

I didn't devolve six years when I started hormones... I stayed a fairly average mental 19, and grew older... I've heard this 'second puberty' thing... and while I understand it chemically, and experienced it, the phenomenon of m2fs mentally turning 13 foxes me.... Wtf? Puberty doesnt mean you have to act like a child... or behave like one as some think they can or should.

[Birdie]

My friends and I use honey and sweety and darling all the time. But it's not really out of the ordinary in Australia, most women here use terms like that when talking to friends.

[rejennyrated]

LOL - and there was I assuming it was just a cultural thing. 

I always assumed people who say Dude were just surfers, and Hun or Hon tends, to my Eurpoean ear, to sound like it is just a typical Americanism.

I had a girl in my MA seminar group last year who called everyone Dude! She definitely wasn't Trans. Prettiest girl in the class.

[Cindy]

Possibly cultural.
I use Honey and Hun all the time on and off boards. I tend to say "morning Hun" to any of the female staff coming in to work. "Hi matey" to the guys. I don't use dude, seems to be an Americanism. Refer to everyone as "Guys". Sweet is also common in Australia as Birdie said.

Cindy

[heatherrose]

Doll, I find it depends on my moods, if I am feeling nurturing or friendly or silly,
I hand out the Sweety's like their going out of style. If I am feeling otherwise,
most would consider themselves lucky to not hear what I have to say.

[Miniar]

It is a little odd.... considering 30-40yo women are going 'hon and girl' and 'like awesome' and acting like 13 yearolds...

Uhm, Most of the cis-women I hear using the terms "hon" and "girl" with one another are well into their 20's or older, so I hardly associate that with thirteen year olds (besides, over half the people I know that use "hon" are grown men anyway...).
And I don't believe I've ever seen one of the women here use "like awesome" (or use the word like excessively) though I've seen people (not just the girls) use the word awesome, it's a perfectly accurate word for many situations and not age nor gender specific in it's general usage either. 

[LordKAT]

irritates me that this one gas station attendant calls me hon and sweetie, she is in her 50's. it feels just wrong to me, a friend says she does it to everyone.

[justmeinoz]

I have finally worked out that I am some species of Androgyne, so being an Aussie, I will call everyone "Mate"

To misquote Churchill, "Americans and Australians, two people divided by a common language".