Overacting?

[The None Blonde]

Uhm, Most of the cis-women I hear using the terms "hon" and "girl" with one another are well into their 20's or older, so I hardly associate that with thirteen year olds (besides, over half the people I know that use "hon" are grown men anyway...).
And I don't believe I've ever seen one of the women here use "like awesome" (or use the word like excessively) though I've seen people (not just the girls) use the word awesome, it's a perfectly accurate word for many situations and not age nor gender specific in it's general usage either.

You misunderstand, i wasnt refering to people saying 'awesome' i was refering to the 'like, awesome' valleygirl speak thing that some transwomen word vomit. The Hon and girl thing, is again. 'excess' I know lots of guys that say hon, women say it too... but its mostly 'love' here.

I mean, I'm in college... its a pretty childish place at times, and pretty free... none of that stuffy adult maturity, but all the other girls are just normal people... Some here act like charactures. Theres deffinately overcompensation amungst transwomen and some trans men, although I admit, transmen seem to do it less. Be it validation, or 'second puberty' it looks right daft.... all this running around saying 'oh my goddess' 'goddess damn' finishing every sentence with 'hon'. While phrases may be used, or even common in the non trans population... transwomen seem to saturate it somehow, hon.

[Miniar]

Mind you, one can argue that the regression to the teenager-like state is an important part of transitioning, from a psychological standpoint, as a means of overwriting those years with new experiences.
For many transpeople the teen years are a big problem because of the whole body betraying us and becoming what we don't want it to be and so on, and as such, that stress forces us to grow up fast and/or robs us of the chance to be a regular teen.
I mean, everyone regresses at some point or another, in some way or another, to one part or another of childhood. It's a part of normal psychological health.
I for one dance and sing and play board games and make childish jokes...

Not saying it's "right" or anything per default, just that I grok it, and it's not that strange "really" when you think about it.

[The None Blonde]

True, we all need a time when we dont have to act our age, but an important thing I belive we need to note, is that in some cases, mostly, transsexual women in this case, have problems 'letting go' of that again. Regressing to a childlike state of behaviour in thier 50s, in public, as default persona, is relatively terrifying... literally 'behaving' like a teen, not just feeling like it. I can undestand the feelings... it all new, its puberty... its how things ought to have been, but for gods sake... the school girl outfit and pigtails on a 50yo woman is quite possibly a tad too far. Excentric example... but you can see my point yes?

[Miniar]

I do see your point, but then, in all fairness, one sees 50 year old cis-women doing the same, so I have a little problem seeing it as a trans related thing first and foremost.

[The None Blonde]

Ugh, thanks for the memory nudge... the locals that used to come into the bar I worked in... i've never seen women so old that its hard to tell where thier skin tight leather mini dress ends, and thier flesh begins.

Hangon, don't we pity ciswomen that do that? Whats the difference?

[Miniar]

Hangon, don't we pity ciswomen that do that? Whats the difference?

That's my point.
This thread is on how transfolk sometimes "over-sell" their preferred gender.. so.. maybe acting/dressing like a 13 year old isn't overselling if the cisgendered girls are no better

[K8]

When I was a cross-dresser, I dressed my age and the local style but noticed there were some who seemed stuck in a certain age or era.  There weren't many, but they were really noticeable.

I think the same is true with trans-people.  There are some who overplay it, and so they are really noticeable.  Less noticeable are the majority who just blend into the background.

I sent my avatar picture with my Christmas letter.  My ex-wife wrote that it's really cute that I'm enjoying my girlishness by being willing to wear a skirt when it's snowing and that she always wears pants because she doesn't want her legs to be cold.  Who knows?  I may not wear a skirt in the snow next winter.

I've found transition to include a very steep learning curve.  Anytime anyone is learning a whole lot of things in a short time, that person will make mistakes.  It's just part of the process.

- Kate

[tekla]

Overacting is just stage shorthand for "chewing up the scenery and overplaying your part" something to keep in mind.

[The None Blonde]

I do think everyones aware what it means to over act...

Kate, you're right, although I would like to raise a point from your post, which I think you agree with, if not... ok, but you mentioned 'blending in' I don't think you meant 'being boring or dull' but being percived as any other woman. Its what I read out of it... and I suspect it will get challenged by someone who loves wearing ball gowns to walmart.. but heck i'll fetch the popcorn.

[LordKAT]

someone who loves wearing ball gowns to walmart.. but heck i'll fetch the popcorn.

interesting, a gown made of balls. all type of balls?  after all you may want to be one of the people of walmart.

(gonna share that popcorn now?)

[K8]

NB: You're right.  I mean being just one more woman along with all the other women - perhaps a little more stylish if that is what you like, or perhaps a little prettier if you can manage it.  I mean unremarkable - in the sense that you do not stand out other than as yourself.  (I've had people I've met briefly only once remember me, but I think it is because I'm friendly and talkative and perhaps because I'm a bit unusual looking.)

Somewhere (this thread?) Jenny said a "tell" was being too perfect.  I think this is true.  I've seen women who I figured had to be cross-dressered men because no natural woman ever looks that perfect outside of film or TV or air-brushed ads.

But if you want to wear a ball gown to Wal-Mart, go for it.  I'll be somewhere in the crowd that is goggling at you, thrilled by your chutzpah but not interested in joining in.  (And perhaps sharing NB's popcorn. )

- Boring old Kate

[The None Blonde]

interesting, a gown made of balls. all type of balls?  after all you may want to be one of the people of walmart.

(gonna share that popcorn now?)

All types of balls... Big balls.... bouncing and full and everybody comes and comes again... if your name is on the guest list no one can take you higher... everybody says I've got the biggest balls of all...








(Disclaimer: Blame AC/DC, )

[pretty pauline]

Never really think about it, I use guy a lot here, never really use dude, my BF calls me sweetie, darling or honey dear, depends on his mood, sometimes he can be childish and call me a ''good girl'' when Iv done something to please him and Im a middle age woman, its just harmless pet name stuff, just comes natural to some people, no big deal.
p

[The None Blonde]

its not the pet names, its overuse of specifics being one facet of this subject... like guys all going 'dude' and the girls saying 'girl' and 'hon' every other word hon.... *grins*

I call other girls Chick, hon, sweetie, babes, darlin, etc... I call guys babes, hon... ah ok most but chick I guess its also more acceptable due to being 22.... 50 yo women walking around calling eachother 'babes' and 'girl' every other sentance is a little.... peturbing.

[Janet_Girl]

So just because I am 55, I am not allowed to use 'Hon', 'Girl' or another words or phrases like that.


Janet

[The None Blonde]

If you read properly, you'll see I didn't say that. the key phrase of today here kids, is 'Over use'

Note that bit... 'over' meaning excess, too much, more than should.... 

[Luna!]

So just because I am 55, I am not allowed to use 'Hon', 'Girl' or another words or phrases like that.

That's not quite what that's about. Seeing people do that makes us wonder about ourselves at that age, and we 20-somethings are not quite ready to think about that just yet. ^_^

[Nero]

So just because I am 55, I am not allowed to use 'Hon', 'Girl' or another words or phrases like that.


Janet

mmm, a lot of women use hon. 70 and 80 year old ladies use hon. I wonder if this is cultural differences here.

[Janet_Girl]

Go into any truck stop and just listen.  It is very common use.

[tekla]

I use all those words (whatever seem appropriate - or even not, I call lots of guys 'babe') like I assume a lot of other people do, because it's easier than trying to remember someones real name.