While I was in the closet a few years ago, I reached menopause rather early. It was a godsend. Fifteen months without bleeding. And the hot flashes really weren't all that bad for me.
Then I had one last "hiccup" and started bleeding again. I was freaking out. I won't describe the scene, but I was, shall we say, deeply unhappy about it for, well, a couple of months. I did think that it was starting over again, so I figured that it would come back in about a month. Then I thought it might have skipped and would come back in two months. After that, I felt better but still wondered if the other shoe was going to drop.
I felt so betrayed and angry and upset...yet I was so deep in the closet that I didn't fully make the connection. I was thinking things like "Men don't bleed," but I couldn't allow myself to fully acknowledge it.
Sorry, Elijah. But I have to say that I think you're better off being honest with yourself. Go ahead and be angry.
P.S. All through junior high, high school, and part of college, I was always paranoid that I was bleeding through and showing. What a freaking nightmare.
