Oh Noes...

[madisonp]

Okay, after reading this you're probably going to think "Wooow, they have a lot of problems."
But anyways, please tolerate my potentially long rant (seeing as I haven't written it yet.)

Okay, so I've finally (FINALLY) come to terms with the fact I am truly a girl. Now...
I am fairly young and I have been told (as well as much research) that starting HRT at a younger age gives you a better chance at passing because the body is barely matured yet. I never look foreword to birthdays anymore.
So, we have Mom, and Dad. I've recently tried asking my mother to bring me to a psychologist, but I told her it was for reasons I couldn't really explain. I'm too scared to tell anybody that I am transgender! D: My father is a whole other story, I'm just scared that if he does find out he'll go into denial and refuse my starting HRT.
I think I'm seriously going into depression, and writing this the way I've written it, I've never felt more like a whiney teenager going through a phase. But please, hear me out, I haven't considered suicide but the path I'm following internally makes me feel as though someday I might.
How do I tell my parents?
Thanks everyone
Madison (Wow, it feels good to use my girl name )


^{edit-personal info}
Post Merge: May 24, 2010, 01:23:12 AM
Im not quite sure what edit personal info means ...
Oh, I think i get it

[rejennyrated]

Oh wow. A bit of a dilemma to be sure. I wish I had some easy answers, but the truth is the only way to do it is to "do it" and see what happens. The good thing is you have found this place. The people here are very supportive and will give you lots of help. Sadly when I came out the internet hadn't even been invented so I was completely on my own.

I originally came out at age 5, and although as a result I was given a certain amount of latitude in my childhood, it was in an age before SRS was widely known about so they all assumed that I would just be effeminate.

When I was 14 I read Jan Morris Connundrum - and then I knew exactly where my life was going. I recall sitting on Brighton beach age 14 and telling my mother what I wanted.

I think at that age you just have to get talking and then come out with it. There really isn't a clever way around it. BUT please be aware that once you have done it there is no way to put the genie back in the bottle.

If your folks are highly religious or very conservative and they react badly there is no way to undo that. You just have to be persistant and refuse to be intimidated.

Also don't imagine that you can tell your mum without your dad finding out. They will talk - so you need to be ready for that - and indeed they might send you to a therapist who believes that he can "cure" you by brainwashing you. There are still a few about, particularly within the evangelical christian world, although that is very rare. Just be CLEAR with them about what you want from this. If they love you (and most parents do) then ulimately they will help you.

Scary though it may seem the worst case scenario is that you might have to wait until you leave home and/or go to college. The medical ideal would indeed be to start right now, but the reality for many as the world stands is that it is simply impractical.

The good news is that most people who start in their late teens or early 20's do well in transition. So don't imagine that just because you can't start today all is lost! It isn't.

One thing to also consider, is whether you can come out to your family doctor first... it depends on the doctor of course, but some of them can be quite helpful, and if yours is one of those, then he or she could perhaps be a help with the parents.

Something I think might help would be to google the stories (and indeed pics) or other young transitioners like for example Kim Petras, Angel Paris Jordan etc presenting their stories to your parents to read MAY help them to understand that this isn't a freeky disaster. Most of us who transition young do go on to lead normal and happy lives. I for exmaple have had a family. I've worked for high profile employers like NASA and BBC TV in the UK and I have had a happy and healthy life.

Finally, if there is one thing I have learned it is that you can never assume how someone will react. Just remember it may not go as badly as you fear so please don't let fear put you off from trying.

Whatever happens I wish you the very best of luck.