Relationships and Sex

[Nikolai James]

The first girl I was [sexually active] with was pretty supportive of me. But then, I think it was deep down because she was happy I wanted to be a guy - she'd only ever dated guys before me and is dating one now, and I think I was more of a "take the opportunity because it's there" thing rather than a genuine interest. Ain't that a kicker.
Nooowww things are a lot trickier. I actually really like sex with my boyfriend but some days it's hard. He is a straight guy and so of course he's going to idealize the feminine parts of me.

My two cents: By the sounds of it it might be best for you both to move on. It's obvious she wants a girl from her comments towards you when you got your binder alone. You're not a girl and you will never be one, so it's fairest to both of you if you find what you each want and need in a relationship rather than dragging on something that causes discomfort to you.

[cynthialee]

I am of the opinion that the best lovers for trans folks are bisexual. Just makes it so you can be sure you are properly apreciated.
jmho

[Nygeel]

I am of the opinion that the best lovers for trans folks are bisexual. Just makes it so you can be sure you are properly apreciated.
jmho

I disagree...met too many transphobic bisexuals...pansexuals tend to objectify trans people from what I've seen. I'm in the whole find somebody you like, tell them you're trans at whatever point you feel is needed/safe and see how it goes.

[Elijah3291]

I am of the opinion that the best lovers for trans folks are bisexual. Just makes it so you can be sure you are properly apreciated.
jmho

my boyfriend is bi.. or maybe he is pan, he says that he likes people for who they are, not their body.. although he has more of a preference for females.. and I get jealous when he sees a hot girl.. when he sees a hot guy, I dont mind.. funny how it works

[Jeatyn]

my boyfriend is bi.. or maybe he is pan, he says that he likes people for who they are, not their body.. although he has more of a preference for females.. and I get jealous when he sees a hot girl.. when he sees a hot guy, I dont mind.. funny how it works

I totally get this, if I was with a guy who I could talk sexy men with that would be awesome. The second I hear a "oh she's hot" comment I get all peeved. I can't compete with that.

[Nimetön]

my boyfriend is bi.. or maybe he is pan, he says that he likes people for who they are, not their body.. although he has more of a preference for females.. and I get jealous when he sees a hot girl.. when he sees a hot guy, I dont mind.. funny how it works

I totally get this, if I was with a guy who I could talk sexy men with that would be awesome. The second I hear a "oh she's hot" comment I get all peeved. I can't compete with that.

I suspect that this is not related to transsexuality, but simply to your being male.  As a biological male, I have the same thought process: I can assess a male competitor, but an attractive female poses a threat to my relationship with which I am physically and sexually unable to compete.

- N

[accord03]

Get away! She isn't treating you as a guy and she probably takes you as a butchy girl. Don't date women who are lesbian and I don't know how some people do it. If you consider yourself a man, why do you date a girl who is lesbian which obviously means shes attracted to a woman. Just makes the whole story a mess and one of them just gets hurt at the end.

[Nygeel]

Get away! She isn't treating you as a guy and she probably takes you as a butchy girl. Don't date women who are lesbian and I don't know how some people do it. If you consider yourself a man, why do you date a girl who is lesbian which obviously means shes attracted to a woman. Just makes the whole story a mess and one of them just gets hurt at the end.

Not always. Just because they identify as a lesbian doesn't mean they don't have some attraction to men and/or masculinity. If she IDed as bisexual she would still be attracted to women but that doesn't make a person's identity less valid. Plus there's a very very fine line between butch and trans.

[DamienR]

Get away! She isn't treating you as a guy and she probably takes you as a butchy girl. Don't date women who are lesbian and I don't know how some people do it. If you consider yourself a man, why do you date a girl who is lesbian which obviously means shes attracted to a woman. Just makes the whole story a mess and one of them just gets hurt at the end.

I think I actually already answered that when I said I thought she was bisexual because she has dated men.  It's not that black and white to me.. I don't have this all together yet. Sometimes I don't know what the hell I'm doing.