Weird things that make you dysphoric...

[Crow]

Shopping, oddly enough, doesn't cause any issues for me... but I think that's because usually when I'm at clothes stores it's because my dad wants to pick something up and drags me and Froggy (my brother) along, so me and Froggy hang out in the men's clothing section and drool over outfits together. x3 Actually, last night was one of those occassions-- and I found a polo shirt that matches one of my brother's golf shirts, so we convinced my dad to get it for me so me and Froggy can match! 8D (Then Froggy promptly bought two giant, fluffy pillows for himself. My brother wins at life.) ...also, my dad loves shopping while my mom hates it. That pretty much killed any gender typing I might have attached to shopping. XD


However, going to my family members' social events (my brother's school events, my dad's church, etc.) is a huge issue for me. My family is afraid of me embarassing them in public, so I have to tone down my own identity. Even going to tae kwon do events is a problem (my brother does tae kwon do, and I sometimes do too... but mostly I just join in on the special events like camping trips, because I don't have time/money to attend classes lately), because that's primarily my brother's hang-out, and he doesn't want me to be out to them, because he's afraid they'll stop being his friends if they know about me... which is unfortunate, because they're my friends, too. It's a pretty open-minded place-- I think I would be pretty safe being out, there, but I can't be because my brotehr is afraid of me doing so in a shared space like that. Its really frustrating, because tae kwon do is a big part of what helped me start sorting out the gender thing in the first place, yet I can't even be honest about it there. This summer i'm going on the annual tae kwon do camping trip and will inevitably be sleeping in the girls' tent-- we'll see how that goes.

[justmeinoz]

Have you tried telling them you are just going through a Goth stage ,or whatever, and just worn all black, or similar?

Would this be counter-productive in terms of acceptance of you TS situation in the family?

Just a thought, I never knew what my kids were doing clothes-wise.

[Jeatyn]

Sleep makes me dysphoric

I feel like the way I lay down is "girly" and it really bothers me.

[Crow]

Have you tried telling them you are just going through a Goth stage ,or whatever, and just worn all black, or similar?

Would this be counter-productive in terms of acceptance of you TS situation in the family?

Just a thought, I never knew what my kids were doing clothes-wise.

For me, saying it's a "goth stage" would probably do little more than convince my family that I've completely lost my mind. x3

(Besides, I would have to buy a whole new wardrobe-- everything I own is brightly colored, and mostly consists of polos/button-up shirts and cargo pants, with the occasional gypsy skirt thrown in for good measure. XD)

In any case, my family is far more concerned with my gender than my clothing. As long as I don't bind or wear rainbows when I'm around the people they're trying to impress, I'm fine. I just have to sit through the, "Make sure you don't embarass us" lecture before I go to anything with Froggy.

However, I'm not quite sure what they're going to do once the topic of physically transitioning comes up.

[Elijah3291]

Sleep makes me dysphoric

I feel like the way I lay down is "girly" and it really bothers me.

dude I'm the same I'm glad I'm not the only one

[Jeatyn]

dude I'm the same I'm glad I'm not the only one

Thank god, I thought I was insane

I don't even know what I would class as a MANLY way to sleep. Drunk under a pool table? I haven't a clue.

*looks at bed* I do have hello kitty sheets though, this can't be helping

[Elijah3291]

Thank god, I thought I was insane

I don't even know what I would class as a MANLY way to sleep. Drunk under a pool table? I haven't a clue.

*looks at bed* I do have hello kitty sheets though, this can't be helping

I suppose the male way would be legs apart, arms apart, and sprawled out on your stomach.. thats how I always imagine it

although I like to sleep in a more fetal position with my arms near my head

[Crow]

Thank god, I thought I was insane

I don't even know what I would class as a MANLY way to sleep. Drunk under a pool table? I haven't a clue.

*looks at bed* I do have hello kitty sheets though, this can't be helping

At least you don't share a bed with your mom? My mom works nights and has a queen sized bed. I claimed half of it years ago because I had a loft bed that was way too tall, resulting in me being roasted by the ceiling heat at our old house... we've long since gotten rid of my old loft bed (and the old house), but now my dysphoria and my mom's snoring have both gotten worse. XD So now on weekends (when my mom is home at night), I just drag all my bedding into my own room and sleep on the floor. x3

However, I still sleep with my baby blankets and a stuffed kitten, so I wouldn't exactly describe my sleping as "manly" no matter where I'm sleeping. I have an awesome bug quilt, though, so that absolves me from needing manly sleeping habits! |D (Besides, I'm hardly macho when I'm awake. If I can walk around in a gypsy skirt, I can sleep with childhood comfort items.)

[Jeatyn]

I suppose the male way would be legs apart, arms apart, and sprawled out on your stomach.. thats how I always imagine it

although I like to sleep in a more fetal position with my arms near my head

yeah I like to curl up, keeps me warmer

[Nathan.]

dude I'm the same I'm glad I'm not the only one

Same, I always thought I was alone in this, I like to sleep kind of in a fetal position although not quite that curled up and always get dysphoric about it. It just feels really girly to me   

[Crow]

...if it is any consolation on the sleeping thing, I shall reitterate that my 16-year-old biomale brother just bought himself not one but two of these for his bed.


I have a hard enough time getting to sleep in a comfy, natural-feeling position because of all my back/neck/headache troubles. If I tried to change positions to something less "feminine", I'd probably never sleep again. XD

[Silver]

Guys my age. They're taller, they look older, they sound like guys and they're probably not as insecure in their masculinity as me. Getting over it pretty well though.

My hips, I hate them. Anything that reminds me of them (so sometimes I get really depressed about running.)

And general guys talking about guy stuff. Guys who look like how I would have if I developed correctly are odd, but a little irritating too.

[aydan_boy]

Gym class makes me miserable.
I can't run as long as the other boys, cuz my binders crushing down on my chest, making it hard to breath.
Summer....Cuz other boys can take off there shirt....and i can't....
Seeing old photos of myself. Cuz i look like an ugly fat girl.

[GnomeKid]

Seeing younger boys irks me more than seeing boys my own age.  Mostly because now I am seen as a dude, but then I wasn't. 

Also girls, dating, and talking about it ect.  Makes me want what I feel like I can't have.  At least not nearly as easily/as stress free/happily. Because honestly I don't think I'll ever be able to enjoy sex the way I am now.

[Silver]

Summer....Cuz other boys can take off there shirt....and i can't....

Oh, this too.

[Miniar]

I live across the street from the pool, so.. being hot & cold are both things that set of the chain of thoughts that leave me dysphoric.

[M.Grimm]

I have several typical/expected things that trigger my dysphoria. But for weird stuff...

I had to think about it and here's one that always gets me. It's when girls chit chat incessantly near me. As an example, in a workshop class where people can talk freely as they get their work done, invariably there will be two girls who talk and talk and talk and talk and it never lets up. It drives me nuts. I hate their piping gossipy voices and how stereotypically "girlish" it is, and even though it doesn't involve me, it triggers me anyway.

[zombiesarepeaceful]

Cis guys in general.
Gay guys, cause they can act gay as all hell and still get a slap on the back from another guy and be called a man.
Wrestling people...cause I don't want them to feel my binder. And I'm still not as strong as other guys yet.
Shopping, yeah.
I could go on.
For some reason it makes me feel like ->-bleeped-<- when people say ->-bleeped-<- like, "doesn't it hurt when you get hit in the balls?" or "twist his nipple!" by people who know. Cause in trying to make me feel comfortable... I just feel awkward.
Oh yeah, and if I sit anyway that seems "girly" to me...I hate it. Esp laying down. Fetal position is fine with me, or on my chest with my arms curled under me.

[Farm Boy]

Drawing myself.  You asked for weird things, right?  Well, a couple years back I had an art assignment where I was supposed to draw myself.  It was supposed to be realistic, so I had a hard time with that.  Drawing my female body.  Not cool.

Also, being in the makeup and feminine hygiene isles in the store.  And the women's clothes.  (When I go to the store with family.)  I hate that the people who see me there see me as a girl.

[Dante]

Watching anime makes me really dysphoric.

Me too! It causes my weird "panic attacks" (for lack of what else to call them). I never really understood this, but it mostly happens when characters are in great pain. It hurts, and I don't like it, but I love watching anime.  Stupid dysphoria.

Sleeping gets me too. I can't find a comfortable way to lay down; there's always something uncomfortable. I hate my boobs squishing together the most.  Swimming gets me too, since I can't take my shirt off. I have the hardest time trying to find a top to swim in (I still haven't found anything).