Weird things that make you dysphoric...

[elvistears]

The thing is, it's hair and it'll grow back! Just ease yrself into it, start with a skater shag and see how you go from there.  I didn't go straight for a short back and sides.  Started off with a bowl cut kinda crop and then went shorter.  Now I'm not scared to do anything with my hair!

It's funny cos my uni ID has me with my longest hair ever.  People give me funny looks when they see it. Really need to get a new one.

[Alex Rene]

The thing is, it's hair and it'll grow back! Just ease yrself into it, start with a skater shag and see how you go from there.  I didn't go straight for a short back and sides.  Started off with a bowl cut kinda crop and then went shorter.  Now I'm not scared to do anything with my hair!

It's funny cos my uni ID has me with my longest hair ever.  People give me funny looks when they see it. Really need to get a new one.

Lol, thanks, I'll consider trying that.  It might take a while tho.  One major reason I'm hanging onto my long hair (besides how long I've had it) is that I'm an Irish dancer.  The ladies curl their hair or wear a curly clip-on wig (we jump around so much that they have to be the clip-on type) for competitions.  I own one such wig, but if I cut my real hair much shorter than it is now (just above shoulder-length), it won't tie up under the wig the way its supposed to.  I tried dancing with my shorter hair a couple of times, but I hated how I looked so out of place.  And not that the judges really look that closely at your hairstyle, but I didn't win anything those times, and I wonder if I would have, had I been able to clip on my wig.

I guess I'm partially wanting to cut it off, but then the other part of me is afraid to let it go.  It's just gotta run its course, I guess.

[LordKAT]

I've been thinking about this question and I think the worst is that early morning between waking and sleep when I reach for what I don't have and panic. Wearing a packer when I sleep helps but doesn't stop it. When I feel body parts and then touch myself, even if it is on the waist arm or whatever and it don't match, it gets me real bad. I never found an answer for that. I keep hoping I can scrounge enough cash to make enough difference that I won't keep having to deal with it.

Hair wise, I'm back to waist length.

[elvistears]

Lol, thanks, I'll consider trying that.  It might take a while tho.  One major reason I'm hanging onto my long hair (besides how long I've had it) is that I'm an Irish dancer.  The ladies curl their hair or wear a curly clip-on wig (we jump around so much that they have to be the clip-on type) for competitions.  I own one such wig, but if I cut my real hair much shorter than it is now (just above shoulder-length), it won't tie up under the wig the way its supposed to.  I tried dancing with my shorter hair a couple of times, but I hated how I looked so out of place.  And not that the judges really look that closely at your hairstyle, but I didn't win anything those times, and I wonder if I would have, had I been able to clip on my wig.

I guess I'm partially wanting to cut it off, but then the other part of me is afraid to let it go.  It's just gotta run its course, I guess.

Haha yeah I know all about Irish dancing, I went to a Catholic girls school.  It was huge there.  Anyway, you should take yr time with your hair.  It took me a while.

[Radar]

I had my hair cut off Sunday. Totally liberating, fells natural and gives me way more confidence. Love it. I plan on getting it cut even shorter.

[Vin]

I had my hair cut off Sunday. Totally liberating, fells natural and gives me way more confidence. Love it. I plan on getting it cut even shorter.

I'm so so tempted to get my hair cut really short.

[Espenoah]

I can't wait to get my hair cut. It will be the best day of my life I think.

[Elijah3291]

I'm so so tempted to get my hair cut really short.

do it.. and if parents are a problem get it done and PRETEND that you HATE it and the hairstylist was inept and messed it up really bad and you didnt want it so short

[Silver]

do it.. and if parents are a problem get it done and PRETEND that you HATE it and the hairstylist was inept and messed it up really bad and you didnt want it so short

Lol yeah, that's a pretty good idea. Then trim it yourself so it doesn't grow back (or at least as quickly.)

[Bones]

When my female friends talk to me about their cycles! I don't want to hear it! And also when they start going on about..."You just wouldn't understand what it's like" (These are of course the ones that don't know I'm FtM) and I want to scream...You wanna make a bet? But, I bite my tongue and just do the 'Yeah...must suck' comment.

[Vin]

Parents are a big problem. Meh. Still, next time I'm due for a hair cut (I just had one on Friday) I'm going to get it cut really short.

do it.. and if parents are a problem get it done and PRETEND that you HATE it and the hairstylist was inept and messed it up really bad and you didnt want it so short

[Shang]

Last time I had my hair cut short, it wasn't terribly short (just to my ears) and it looked horrible so I probably won't be cutting it short again anytime soon.

Anyway, seeing bi or gay guys touching one another or holding hands or kissing or getting cuddly make me heavily dysphoric because that's what I want/need to have but I can't have it because I'll never be truly  physically male.

[Bones]

Anyway, seeing bi or gay guys touching one another or holding hands or kissing or getting cuddly make me heavily dysphoric because that's what I want/need to have but I can't have it because I'll never be truly  physically male.

What makes you think that? The part about not ever having that kind of relationship I mean? Is it because you're a FtM and think that bi or gay men won't want to be with you?

[Shang]

What makes you think that? The part about not ever having that kind of relationship I mean? Is it because you're a FtM and think that bi or gay men won't want to be with you?

No, that's not what I meant--I'm currently dating a bi guy, actually.  I'm bi, but there is this overpowering urge to be in a relationship with a physical male and for me to be physically male in that relationship also and it's something I have trouble handling and always have when I've had boyfriends, it just doesn't feel right being female and being in the relationship (though it doesn't feel right being female in any sort of relationship, whether or not the person is male or female).  But truly physical, not what I can get with any sort of surgery (at least not with the surgery now-a-days).  I hope that makes sense, it's the first time I've tried describing it through writing--it's pretty hard to describe IRL as is.

[Bones]

No, that's not what I meant--I'm currently dating a bi guy, actually.  I'm bi, but there is this overpowering urge to be in a relationship with a physical male and for me to be physically male in that relationship also and it's something I have trouble handling and always have when I've had boyfriends, it just doesn't feel right being female and being in the relationship (though it doesn't feel right being female in any sort of relationship, whether or not the person is male or female).  But truly physical, not what I can get with any sort of surgery (at least not with the surgery now-a-days).  I hope that makes sense, it's the first time I've tried describing it through writing--it's pretty hard to describe IRL as is.

No, I think I gotcha...I have a hard time with it too. When I'm with my girl I feel like she might think we're a lesbian couple rather than a man and woman. I get completely stupid with her sometimes and she has to slap me and say 'Baby, you're a man. I know you're a man and you need to stop worrying'. I always feel like I've in some way...cheated her on some level.

[Shang]

No, I think I gotcha...I have a hard time with it too. When I'm with my girl I feel like she might think we're a lesbian couple rather than a man and woman. I get completely stupid with her sometimes and she has to slap me and say 'Baby, you're a man. I know you're a man and you need to stop worrying'. I always feel like I've in some way...cheated her on some level.

Yes!  That's it!  It's why I'm hesitant to enter a relationship with a girl (I'm polyamourus, though non-practicing right now because, like I said, I'm hesitant to enter a relationship with a girl).

[insanitylives]

I've got the same problem with my hair.  I always kept it ridiculously long and only recently cut it to just below shoulder length.  I like having long hair, but I couldn't pass with it.  I'm debating cutting it into a shaggy skater-ish hairdo but I'm afraid I'll miss it...  And that I'll look weird and still not pass...

you get used to it

speaking of which i need a hair cut last month. Starting to look like a *feminine* lesbian again >.>
(fast growing hair despite my poor eating habits, no money to get it cut, and a mom who doesn't want me just getting an $8 razor comb and doing it myself)

[Alex Rene]

No, that's not what I meant--I'm currently dating a bi guy, actually.  I'm bi, but there is this overpowering urge to be in a relationship with a physical male and for me to be physically male in that relationship also and it's something I have trouble handling and always have when I've had boyfriends, it just doesn't feel right being female and being in the relationship (though it doesn't feel right being female in any sort of relationship, whether or not the person is male or female).  But truly physical, not what I can get with any sort of surgery (at least not with the surgery now-a-days).  I hope that makes sense, it's the first time I've tried describing it through writing--it's pretty hard to describe IRL as is.

I hear ya too...I identify as a gay male, but I feel like I'd be cheating or something if I were to try being with a bio guy.  Besides, I don't have the internal organs bio men do that would make anal sex that much better.  I just wonder how that might work if I don't have that sweet spot.  Sorry if that's TMI 

[Shang]

I hear ya too...I identify as a gay male, but I feel like I'd be cheating or something if I were to try being with a bio guy.  Besides, I don't have the internal organs bio men do that would make anal sex that much better.  I just wonder how that might work if I don't have that sweet spot.  Sorry if that's TMI 

Not at all!  Yeah, bio men get that lucky little spot, but bio women can enjoy anal, too.  A lot do, in fact, whether they're straight, bi, etc. 

[elvistears]

Hey I enjoy it HEAPS and I don't have that spot. TMI! It's the only thing I'll be submissive for.