Not allowed to transition?

[Britney♥Bieber]

Sister like I always say, you already have a vagina but just like 6 pack abs, it's just hiding behind the fat cause it's a little shy! 

You will always be KIM and no one can change that. No amount of hormones or surgery can change that. You are you in the end and that's what people should accept. Nothing more...Nothing less.

Aww thanks. That's why I love this site. Everyone here knows who I really am, and it makes me feel a lot better. Then I get offline and I'm michael again =/

[Inphyy]

Aww thanks. That's why I love this site. Everyone here knows who I really am, and it makes me feel a lot better. Then I get offline and I'm michael again =/

But that is just the reality of things; For example, Britney Spears and Rihanna don't look the way they do when they wake up! They have a ton of makeup artists, hair stylers, clothes outfitters, etc. etc.

Everything in this world is sort of a "facade" in someway, it just depends on how real you seem to make it.

[Britney♥Bieber]

I know that haha. I just want long hair and boobs. and some high heels. I'll be good haha Plus when I come out, it'll be easier. I just want to be able to be seen as a girl by everyone.

[Inphyy]

I know that haha. I just want long hair and boobs. and some high heels. I'll be good haha Plus when I come out, it'll be easier. I just want to be able to be seen as a girl by everyone.

But sadly not everyone in the world, despite having boobs, longer hair, high heels and etc. etc. will see you as an girl I've had to learn it the hard way, no matter what you do...Surgery, FFS, legally change everything. Some people just won't see you as Kim...

Like RuPaul says, "You're born naked and the rest is drag...We all play roles and there's two types of people in the world, ones who know we're all just actors playing roles in the world and the ones who truly believe they are the role they are playing."

[Britney♥Bieber]

True. I shouldn't say everyone. Maybe just myself. =/

[SamanthaElle]

Oh don't say that, if not everyone, almost everyone. And the people that don't, you probably don't want their opinion anyways.

[Britney♥Bieber]

Oh don't say that, if not everyone, almost everyone. And the people that don't, you probably don't want their opinion anyways.

True. I don't really care how anyone see's or thinks of me. I just want to be happy with myself. I'll be fine then I'll look in a mirror and be like ughhh. =/

[Inphyy]

True. I don't really care how anyone see's or thinks of me. I just want to be happy with myself. I'll be fine then I'll look in a mirror and be like ughhh. =/

The only acceptance is that of yourself...No one else matters in the end besides you. If you can't accept yourself -- How in the world can you trust your own self?! Be you. Trust you. Love you and accept you and everything else will fall into place at its own due time.

[Britney♥Bieber]

I don't want to accept how I look! I guess I will in time. It just stinks. 

[Inphyy]

I don't want to accept how I look! I guess I will in time. It just stinks. 

But how can you expect other people to accept you if you can't accept your own self?!

[Britney♥Bieber]

I don't .

[Griffin]

So I'm curious are there any reasons I would not be allowed to transition? Should I worry?

I know I'm probably not supposed to be in here, but....

No one can prevent your social transition, ie living as your true self.  You don't need letters to change your name, work as female, go to college, etc.  I started my transition at 17 with no help at all and no money.  At 16, my family doc hadn't said no exactly, but wouldn't give me hormones or a referral.  He didn't even note it in the chart because of the stigma.

The reality is that there are enough doctors out there who specialize in trans care, that you could get in even without a letter and begin hormones.  Some hormone docs use "informed consent" which means they prescribe without a letter.  Once you're full-time, you can get hormones from an even wider network of doctors because most follow WPATH standards which allows it.

Totally an aside, but I've found that with non-trans friends/family who are curious, to give the impression that I am master of my own destiny.  Most of my close friends just know that I qualify for whatever it is that I'm doing, since I have a doctor and surgeon.  Most people know there are certain diagnostic criteria, but are fuzzy on the specifics.  Saying that you are being treated or that a doctor is open to see you (true) is probably enough to satisfy their curiosity/fears.

[Britney♥Bieber]

Yeah that's what I told my friend. No matter what anyone tells me, I still feel like I'm a girl. Ever since I came to this realization, I've never been happier. Plus, saying I'm transgender feels right, compared to saying I'm a gay male. That never felt okay. And thanks for the info!
Post Merge: July 19, 2010, 02:55:48 AM
also, it's not that I don't accept the way I look, I just know I'm not supposed to look like a boy, and it makes me sad when I'm reminded that I do.

[Griffin]

Yeah that's what I told my friend. No matter what anyone tells me, I still feel like I'm a girl. Ever since I came to this realization, I've never been happier. Plus, saying I'm transgender feels right, compared to saying I'm a gay male. That never felt okay. And thanks for the info!

also, it's not that I don't accept the way I look, I just know I'm not supposed to look like a boy, and it makes me sad when I'm reminded that I do.

Understandable!  Transition is all about doing what feels right.  If transitioning feels right, and you want to try hormones, then go for it.  If transition is right for you , then hormones will only increase the feelings of peace and rightness. =)

[Britney♥Bieber]

That's how I see it.

[Griffin]

Transition is like a train headed one direction.  There are lots of stops, and you can get off on any one of them.  Once you're off the train, you can get back on and keep going, but you can't go backwards.  So always really think about what you are feeling and what is right for you and you only 

[Britney♥Bieber]

I understand! I really don't think anything else could make me happier. Being a girl makes sense of so many feelings I've had my whole life.

[rejennyrated]

Yeah that's what I told my friend. No matter what anyone tells me, I still feel like I'm a girl. Ever since I came to this realization, I've never been happier. Plus, saying I'm transgender feels right, compared to saying I'm a gay male. That never felt okay. And thanks for the info!
Post Merge: July 19, 2010, 01:55:48 AM
also, it's not that I don't accept the way I look, I just know I'm not supposed to look like a boy, and it makes me sad when I'm reminded that I do.

When people used to ask me what it was like before I always tell them I felt like a ghost, because despite looking in mirrors I could never see myself - just some imposter standing in my place.

I knew that every time I met someone they did not see me. They saw a phantasm, and illusion, which they mistook for me.

Eventually, having had one taste of the delays involved with therapy, I got so desperate that I just transitioned without medical help.

As a result I made sure that the next time I went back to therapy I was presenting as 100% transitoned (past tense) female, in the hope that he had nowhere else to go with me but to write my surgical letter. I was lucky. I got sent to the surgeon on my first visit. He accepted that as I had done all the hard work without any help, there was only one thing he could do and that to make me wait for a year so that he could monitor a "formal" RLE was ridiculous.

Because I had changed all my docs over year before he could see that I had "done my time" even though it had been completely unsupervised. I admit I did take a huge risk in the way I handled my HRT without supervision, and I don't know that I would exactly recommend doing that, but as far as the transition to full time living is concerned yes I would do it again excatly the same.

You don't need a doctors permission to live as yourself, and whilst having the HRT makes it easier, it IS possible to do without. Back in the days before the internet it took me some while to find my ahem unofficial hormone supplies and during all that time I was cross living without them.

So if you want to transition I would say do it. At very least it will show your therapist that you mean business, and if you find someone who is sensible, it should lead to a swift issue of HRT at least, and hopefully SRS.

Oh and at 19 you are plenty old enough to do it.

[Britney♥Bieber]

Aww Jenny i love your posts! I plan to start transitioning as soon as my hair is long enough to style like a girl. HRT or not. I hope my instincts about my therapist are right. He seems really informed with trans issues and he spoke about working with some in support groups. He also said I'm not the most butch guy he's ever seen, which was nice haha.

[April Dawne]

I think you make a great girl already, and HRT will only make things even better! Like many here, I can speak from experience. I was so angry and depressed and hateful and moody and often felt just dead and empty inside. Like I was sleepwalking through life or something. Nothing mattered. I didn't care about myself, didn't care if I lived or died. Once I started HRT all that changed. I felt alive. I was so GD happy and full of joy and love and .... well, inner peace I guess. All the bad negative emotions just melted away, and I felt a balance and serenity I had never experienced before. I had known for a long time that this feeling was there, under the surface, but I didn't know how to get to it or bring it up. Hormones took care of it for me. I just can't fully express how much I feel like a completely different, new, beautiful person full of love and compassion and light and joy. It's amazing sometimes how finding the right path can set you free. I finally love being me. You will too.

~April