Stress

[MRH]

My boyfriend finished school 2 years ago and for those 2 years he didnt search for a job because he had suffered a lot at school due to him being Bipolar and with only 2 GCSE's didnt feel he could get a job. Anyway about a month ago he finally got a job working at Blockbusters which was perfect for him but about a week ago he got a warning as he was working way too slow and needed to speed up and today he ended up coming home an hour early and he wouldnt talk to me so I assumed the worst. Eventually he told me he had been sent home as he was far too tired to continue. If he feels he can not work then he can leave the job and then apply again once he is ready but it took him ages to get a job there and the oppotunity may not come again so quickly. If he chooses to stay on but does not improve then he will be fired and he will not be allowed to work in that shop again. As you can imagine its very stressful for him and its effecting me too. We dont know why he gets so tired. He is not lazy, in fact he can do a lot of hard work and not get tired, but for some reason, every now and again, this happens. We wondered if it was down to having Bipolar Disorder but this has not effected him since he left school. He has had very stable moods and, for lack of a better word, is now "normal". We wondered if its a diet thing as he usually only eats sugar and fat. Despite that though he is underweight but thats a genetic thing. We also considered medical issues such as anema. He will go to the doctors soon but he has to decide what he is doing in his job by saturday and he wont be able to see anyone before then. So should he take the gamble and stay on and hope that he can overcome these low energy levels or should he quit and hope in a few months that he can get another job?

[spacial]

He should see a Dr about his tiredness.

One thing that can cause this, especially mental tiredness, is disturbed sleep. If he is stressed, lacking self confidence, woried, these can all contribute to disturbed sleep.

But one thing he does need to do, and by he, I mean him, not you continually telling him, is get himself into a routine. getting up at the sort of time he would for work and going to bed at a reasonable time. Also, he need to get at least 8 hours sleep a night, so the arithmetic should be simple.

But he does need to see a Dr about his tiredness.

[MRH]

His sleep is pretty good and at the moment he's only doing 2 days a week so he can get used to the job but he is meant to be working full time. His shifts tend to be 3pm-8pm so its not like he needs to be up early. We usually go to bed at 1am which isnt so great but he does get good sleep.

[spacial]

It not so much the sleep and the quality of it.

But it was just a suggestion. There must be some explaination for his tiredness.

though I do hope you suggest to him about getting a stable routine.

[Jeatyn]

A diet of junk food will certainly make you tired and sluggish. Anaemia can make you exhausted, I suffer from it myself and occasionally require iron injections. Definitely get him to a doctor just to check things out. Even without seeing a doctor a better diet is always a good idea, this will help with anaemia too if the cause is poor nutrition.

I would 100% suggest he sticks at this job, if he quits then what's to stop the tiredness from affecting his next job, should he be able to find one.

[MRH]

He's decided to stay on and he's got a doctors appointment. I just hope he doesnt get fired

[spacial]

Of course you don't and so die he, but if he does, then you can deal with it.

In times of recession, job security is generally terrible. Most employers, especially when they consider the job to need minimal skills, tend to fire workers simply to have a chance to try another. Some also seem to think that, by making the remaining workers feel insecure, they will work harder.

These, sadly are the realities your boyfriend is facing, as are many others.

But to be frank, you are no stranger to difficulities. He's a lucky guy to have you.

[CChristian]

Advice from a manager of a restaurant would have to be for him to sit down with his managers and discuss his problems with them. I always love to here my employees' problems, and it reassures me that they are committed. It helps me when there is transparency between me and my employees. Btw, did you know that to much sleep can actually cause you to be tired during the day, and waking up to early or to late can cause the same?

[brittanyfear]

Being bipolar, I can understand how sometimes makes stress that much more exhausting.

Is he on medications? Helps me. Maybe he should talk to the doctor about that too.

Also, a ->-bleeped-<- diet never helps things.

[MRH]

It doesnt matter now. He just got fired and for bull->-bleeped-<- reasons too. They said that all the staff had reported back that he was being rude to the customers and was never polite. Now I dont know a more polite person even when he's in a crap mood. He always kind to everyone. Thing is they also hired someone else at the same time and so we're thinking maybe they only wanted one and so they got rid of my boyfriend. The only thing that is really annoying me is their excuse. He was also picking up with his speed and things were going well.

[lilacwoman]

It doesnt matter now.

Hard fact of life: businesses have to keep customers happy so anything that loses or may lose customers should be spotted and actioned by the management before things progress too far down.
Your b/f taking two years off and doing nothing does not instil comfidence in potential managers.  he got a lucky break once but ruined it by his attitude so tell him to get his act together and start job hunting in earnest...although now he has a black mark on his work record it might be good to push him back to some education or work experience.

[MRH]

But in no way was he rude. In fact customers loved him. The manager even stated a few weeks back that my boyfriend was brilliant with people. Thats what I dont understand. Im assuming it is because they only could keep one of the two new people employed. Theres no chance in hell he will return to education. He's too old to get in for free now and his family wouldnt be able to pay. He suffered terribly at school due to severe mental health issues and so does not feel too good about going back. Plus he isnt that academically smart. He's incredibly wise but not academic. His ultimate dream would to be an artist. You should see his work. There is nothing quite like it and every body who has seen it is amazed (even our art teacher and shes one stubborn snob). Unfortunately he lacks the motivation to get there and isnt sure what the next step to achieveing that dream is.

[Lewis]

My guess is that a more balanced diet will help with the tiredness. He'll be lacking a lot (if not all) major vitamins if he's eating only sugar and fat.  Sugar is a "fast carb" meaning that it's burned off well before your next meal. Substituting for slow carbs (starchy food, like bread, potatoes, pasta etc) is better. If he needs to snack, can he be convinced to snack on things like dried fruit or nuts instead of sugary stuff?