Roommating

[James42]

So I'm trying to find a room to rent, seeing as how florida apartments are expensive near the beach and I'm saving up for top surgery. The problem is, I'm not exatly sure how to go about it as far as being trans. I can't really remain stealth when I'm living with someone, things are bound to be known, but I'm not exactly sure how/when to tell the person.

Any ideas?

[Cameron James]

If you're looking to rent from someone, I would tell them as soon as possible. I know most renters will ask you about yourself - either in person or via email. So I'd come out then. That way you don't get halfway through the rental process and have them turn out to be transphobic.

You may want to see if there's a LGBT Center in the area you're looking into - they may be able to hook you up with someone who's looking for a roomie.

[Kris]

Yeah i would do the same thing like what I say "Hey whatup I'm crystal but I prefer Kris" therefore they get the idea lol. I mean it'll still be weird a little bit walking around without my binder on around them but if you told them from the start and they still let you rent a room they must be cool with it so i guess it wouldn't really be that big of a deal to them...

[ilanthefirst]

If it's relatively separate living (not a roommate, but sharing an apartment/house), you might be able to pull off being stealth if that's what you want.  But, yeah, in a conservative area like some of Florida, you might end up living with a transphobic person who would react badly if you accidentally outed yourself, which could happen in a million ways, so worrying about that might drive you crazy.  I think both of the above repliers have good ideas.  Also, you may find that searchable directories are your new best friend, because you can find out who's okay with both male and female roommates and even who's specifically LGB(T?)-friendly.

Edit: I meant you can literally search for the term "LGBT" in the listings on, say, Craigslist.  Sorry that was unclear!

[James42]

Well the city I live in is pretty laidback, but I still wouldn't want to try being stealth with a housemate, being pre everything. And my city doesn't really have many lgbt or trans sources. Where I'm stuck is just figuring out what to say in like an email response to an ad.

[lilacwoman]

Well the city I live in is pretty laidback, but I still wouldn't want to try being stealth with a housemate, being pre everything. And my city doesn't really have many lgbt or trans sources. Where I'm stuck is just figuring out what to say in like an email response to an ad.

well just say you are seeking an economical house/flat sharing with your own bedroom because you are moving to that place for study/work.
with the US hosuing market the way it is now you will find that landlords will be glad to have anyone who can be a good tenant.
In your email reply to adverts put something about how much you can afford to pay and where the money is coming from and that might sway things in your favour.