Corrupt-A-Wish

[HonestReflections]

Granted; the rotten headache dissolves only to be replaced by a fresh headache.

I wish ... for ... a shrubbery!!!!

ROFLMFAO were you refering to what I think you were?

[justmeinoz]

Granted. You now have a man's body in the lounge room and the Homicide Squad want to play 20 Questions!

I wish I wasn't coming down with a cold.

[HonestReflections]

Granted: It is not a cold, but you are pregnant
I wish that I could meet Shania Twain, one of my greatest inspirations.

[~RoadToTrista~]

Granted, but she's a bitch in person.

I wish I could shuffle.

[justmeinoz]

Granted. You can now shuffle, but they won't let you play because you always trump your partner's aces.

I wish the real estate rep would turn up to do the valuation on the house.

[~RoadToTrista~]

Oops I meant shuffle dancing lolz

Granted but right when she's at the door you trip and make a large hole in the wall somehow.

I wish I could grow my hair out at will.

[Sephirah]

Granted, but Will gets the fright of his life at the sudden appearance of a mass of hair approaching him.

I wish there were no more sunny days. Ever.

[HonestReflections]

Granted, but your hair grwos out as large worms and they never go away.
I wish that I could find enough help to go to veterinary or psychology school

[justmeinoz]

Granted. Someone gives you a lift to Moscow Veterinary College.
I wish my chest looked more like my avatar's.

[Lee]

Granted, but your face now looks more like my avatar's.
I wish my AC were quieter.

[HonestReflections]

Granted: it doesn't work at all
I wish that I could take a better pic of myself

[April Dawne]

Granted; you can take a better pic of your foot....

I wish one of the jobs I applied to recently would hire me.

[Dante]

Granted, you get hired. Then you spill hot coffee on your boss the next day and you're fired.

I wish my dad would stop telling me to try harder without actually caring to ask what's wrong. 

[HonestReflections]

Granted: He asks you what is wrong, then just hugs you and walks off as you tell him. (Sorry but I couldn't totally corrupt it. Reminds me of my mom)
I wish that my step brother's testicles would rot off as he sits in jail and pays for what he did.

[Dante]

Granted, he rots in jail for whatever it was he did. When he gets out, he regrets whatever he did, and begs for forgiveness, but you are unable to forgive him, and you become old and bitter. (wow, that was kinda emo  )

I wish I could read, write, and speak Japanese fluently.

[~RoadToTrista~]

Granted, but unfortunately Japanese becomes a dead language 5 minutes later.

I wish I passed my Algerbra II final.

[justmeinoz]

Grante, but as you did Algebra 2 last year and Algebra3 this year it is no help whatsoever.

I wish my new hairpiece would stay in place better.

[HonestReflections]

Granted: But it stays attached to your chin, making a very disturbing-looking beard that you can't shave no matter what you try to do.
I wish these samll-town biggots would shove their comments up their penises.

[Lee]

Granted, but they make so many bigoted comments that it becomes the new trend in penile enlargement.
I wish my cell and molecular bio class were shorter.

[justmeinoz]

Granted, your cell is shorter. So short that you can't sleep comfortably.
When they let you out to do the Molecular Bio class you fall asleep in class, despite it only lasting 20 minutes.

I wish the Winter Fashion Parade at the shopping mall had lasted longer than 5 minutes.