I feel like a girl today. o.o

[Devyn]

It's really weird. I woke up this morning and my body didn't bother me.

So, I got up and took a shower because my dad, step mom, and I are going to go out to eat lunch and then go see that new movie Megamind together. Well, I was getting dressed after my shower and I thought, "You know, I don't mind having boobs today." So I'm actually wearing a bra.

Today feels like an episode of The Twilight Zone for me. It's like, all my life since now I've been uncomfortable with my body and felt like a boy. Now I feel like a girl and I don't care that I have a female body. It's weird as ->-bleeped-<-.

I woke up and felt different. This is really, really weird. I have no words to describe this feeling except that I'm actually not depressed today.

Well, right now, I'm getting my shoes on, getting ready to leave. We're going to my favorite Asian buffet. Today must be my day or something.

That, or God actually listened to me for once. (Basically, I've prayed to God for years to either make me feel like a normal girl or give me male parts.)

Oh well, I don't mind.

I'm wearing a tank top today and a girls' button up shirt, and guy pants (but that's because I don't have any girl pants.) I just feel like...a tomboy today - and that's okay with me. At least I'm not feeling suicidally depressed like I have been for months because of my gender dysphoria.

This is a really, really weird feeling. That's the only way I know how to put it.

And if I end up having a dysphoria attack in the middle of the movie I'm going to see or during lunch, well...I don't know what I'll do then. If that happens, then I'm pretty much screwed until I get home. If that does happen, then I'll edit this post. If not, then I don't know.

[Shang]

I agree it's a weird feeling, but I do love it--mostly because it gives me a chance to run around in something frilly and wear the clothes I really love. 

Have fun today and I hope the day remains well for you!

[Silver]

Fascinating. Well if a solution has suddenly appeared, I congratulate you. Hope it works out well.

[Aegir]

I don't mean to be an ->-bleeped-<-, but that feeling hit me after I'd gotten a lot of ->-bleeped-<- and gave up, and I floated around with no direction or ambitions for a few years then I started trying to be a normal well-adjusted adult and it all came back. If for the next few weeks you notice you're not really doing anything at all... therapist.

[Epigania]

I'll be honest.  Off and on over the years, I have had a rare day that I would look in the mirror and feel good about myself and think I looked good.

I don't think it is bad, but its nice to have good days, that's for sure!

[Bluetraveler]

That's a bit strange, Devyn. Was it out of the blue?

[justmeinoz]

Whatever floats your boat, maybe you are just going through an androgyne phase. 
Whatever it is, Have fun!

[Devyn]

That's a bit strange, Devyn. Was it out of the blue?

Yeah. That's what confused me. 

[Nikolai_S]

That's happened to me a few times... it's always pretty bizarre. There are a few things that seem to control it for me. A., I'm so happy and relaxed and carefree that discomforts just fade into the background - things that make me unhappy are sort of numbed. B., I'm the opposite. Exhausted from being constantly dysphoric, so I just block out all of the pain and pretend I'm not even in this body. Or C., I'm having a genuinely androgynous day. My mood has floated towards the feminine. I look in the mirror, think "oh... pretty. ok," and move on without even caring. The last one bothered me the most because it made me question being trans. But on those days, I can make myself look really masculine and still not care. So I'm pretty sure that having a day like that on T will be unnoticeable, maybe I'll get a little flamboyant.

I used to think I was bigender or gender fluid. But I always prefer male pronouns, even if female pronouns don't bother me. I always prefer my male name, and binding even if boobs aren't that big of a deal. And in the middle of those days when I don't care, a lot of times I will have that dysphoric breakdown. There was a time when I entered denial because I was too stressed out being unable to do anything. It lasted a month, maybe a few months. And at the end of it I had one of the worst breakdowns I have ever had. So I'm beginning to think it's our minds' way of giving us a break. Letting us be fine for once, regain some peace. Or it could be a sign of androgyny or fluidity, probably different for each person. But for me, I highly doubt it is.

[sej]

It's really weird. I woke up this morning and my body didn't bother me.

I only ever experienced this after I had been injecting testosterone for two or three months.  For me, it was a feeling of "wow, the parts of my body that I usually feel utterly ashamed of aren't bothering me as much because I know I don't have to live with them forever."  I've also always been into drag queens, and I've recently been feeling comfortable wearing women's clothing within the context of drag.  I'm gay, and my closest friends are, too.  I feel like I can enjoy playing dress up in the same way they can now that society doesn't make me feel OBLIGATED to wear a bra.  Not that I can really fill out a bra the way I used to, anyway (at least I had prior experience stuffing--even if it was for other places before).

[Michael Joseph]

Hmm this has never happened to me. I dont think ill ever be able to wake up comfortable in this body, but good for you!