Quote from: marissak on November 12, 2010, 08:21:33 PM
Someone I had met at a conference and who presented a topic on cognitive psychology had done some research through which he found that men were more likely to be aroused by images of pre-op transsexuals than by images of post-op transsexuals. Men who are attracted towards "->-bleeped-<-s" are not interested in them because they see them as female, but rather because they are aroused by the dehumanized "creature" with a human female form but with the human male sexual organ.
There's also a prevalent belief that trans people in their attempt to pass as female typically overdo the feminine characteristics that makes females sexually appealing to men (eg. extra large breasts, wigs with hair looking too good, etc). In other words, there is a general opinion among men interested in "->-bleeped-<-s" that trans people in general are more sexually appealing, although never as a long-term mate regardless of their reproductive goals.
Quote from: SamanthaFLA on November 13, 2010, 01:34:23 PM
I understand the desperation. I really really reallllly do. It still doesn't keep it from upsetting me. I'm not mad at the girls directly. I'm just upset about negative consequences of what they're doing.
I see it this way. We are all split into 2 categories. Porn Transsexuals, and Regular Transsexuals.
Regular transsexuals tend to stay stealthy, more or less. They don't advertise the fact that they are transsexual, they just try to live life, happily. No one really knows about them, a lot tend to just blend in.
Porn Transsexuals is what the general public tends to see transsexualism as. Because they have nothing else to compare us with.
It makes me sad that all of this negative stigma about transsexuals exist. I would venture to guess that only a very small percentage of us are actually in porn. But that small percentage is all anyone knows. So the rest of us are forced to walk around with that label.
I agree with what many others have said, that porn, Maury, Springer, et al. are the usual means of exposure for most people.
Via those mediums transwomen are usually portrayed as hyper-sexual, overly-feminized cariactures of women. We are seen as women who are sexually promiscuous, either for free or for pay. With us men feel that they don't have to put any effort into intimacy or relationships, and that we are easy notches in a bedpost.
But also as has been stated, there is the transwoman who is not engaged in the sex trade. She may be pre or post op, and for the most part she lives her life just like any other woman. She goes to work, or school, may attend church, has family and friends, runs errands, basically does the same things that her natal counter-part does.
The latter describes me, I live stealth, a very main-stream live, I'm not promiscuous. A man would have to work very hard to be in a relationship or be intimate with me. When you look at me, talk with me, all that you would see is a regular woman. I am not a woman with "something extra", I am not the "best of both worlds", I am not a "special lady", at least not in that context, and I most assuredly would not be categorized by any of the vile terms used in porn to market transwomen.
->-bleeped-<-s have no interest in me, for I am devoid of the fetish object that they seek, I have no penis, I have a vagina, I am also not easy prey, and I must say that I am glad that they have no interest in me. As being in relationship with a man who was attracted to me for that reason would be very disconcerting and angst producing to me.
Post operatively, sans penis I am able to live my life as it was intended. Now when I am in a relationship, it is with someone who values, cherishes and loves the totality of me, and does not objectify and view me as a fetish object.
