Friend Issues.

[Kentrie]

I hang out with A LOT of people at school and I'm out to some of them but yesterday when I was pre-assigned from class, my friend Tiffany and I walked down and just sat in the lunchroom for an hour and a half. Well, her friend Sarah who I talk to also came over and sat with us and she asked me why I "decided" to be a lesbian and I said "I'm not a lesbian", Sarah said "Well, why did you decide to be bi?" I said "I'm not bi" Sarah said "Well then, why did you decide to like girls?" I didn't know how to answer that and I didn't really want to so I just said "I don't know", then Sarah said "Just to let you know, I'm not like that so if you try to make a move on me then I'll smack you in the face." I was thinking "Ewwww, like I would ever like a skanky bit** like you!" Then one of my best friends, Tiffany spoke up and said "Yeah, if she ever made a move on me then I would punch her in the face." That infuriated me so said "Okay, listen to me! I do not like either of you! Neither of you are my type in any way!" I restrained myself from saying "You're both f*** ugly!" Which they both are. I was getting ready to hit Sarah. When Sarah left, I told Tiffany "Why the hell would you even THINK I would EVER like you?!" Tiffany said "Well, you were kind of flirting with me today." I said "How!!" Tiffany said "When you kept pulling at my jacket." I said "I was NOT flirting with you, I was playing around!" Tiffany just said "Oh." I asked her why she would punch me in the face for, because she knows I'm not a lesbian. She just said "I meant, if you ever tried to jump on me or attack me in any way." I said "Oh, I would never do that to anyone." So I'm not mad at her. Last night I texted Tiffany and asked her if she was mad at me and she replied back and said "No, why?" I texted back and said "Because I was being a Jackass today." She texted me and said "I was kind of mad when you were saying that stuff about Sarah." And then out of no where Sarah used Tiffany's phone (They were staying with each other) and texted me saying "This is Sarah by the way." I said "You need to stop treating me like a freak because I'm not a freak, I'm a human being." Sarah said "I have my opinion and you have yours." I said "I'm not a lesbian" Sarah said "Bi and Lesbian are the same thing." I said "I'm a Transsexual, Jesus Christ, if I was gay then I would like boys." Sarah said "Nah, if you like boys then you're straight but if you like girls then you're a lesbian." I got really mad then and said "->-bleeped-<- off you ignorant bitch!" Sarah said "You're the one whi is ignorant" I said "No, at least I know what I am and I accept it so shut your skanky mouth you stupid bitch!" Sarah said "How about you make me on Monday." I said "Sorry, but I don't hit girls." Sarah said "You're not worth my time or anyone elses. You're a freak for thinking you're a boy when you're not." I shut my phone off at that point because If I replied back, I would get in trouble for what I was going to say to her. How do you deal with people like this? I know I was saying mean stuff to her but I can be a very mean person when I'm mad.

[MaxAloysius]

Wow, that's so terrible! I've never had to deal with any kind of hate or anything like that, but I can understand that to have someone say all of that stuff to you must have been aweful!

I just don't understand what fills people with such hate? Also, I hate to say it but those friends of yours, they don't sound much like friends to me. This may be pointless advice, but if it were me, I'd dump both of them, and find some friends who actually understand me, or at least make an effort to try. Do you have any other options when it comes to the people you hang out with, or are you in one of those situations where you basically have to 'like it or lump it'? Either way, kinda sounds to me like neither of these girls are open to being educated about anything, and sadly, I doubt anything you could say would change that

And about your replies to her, yeah they were harsh, but I think totally justified. If I was in your possition, I would have ripped her a new one!

[NightWing]

I agree with MaxAloysius.  If they're going to be jerks and not even listen, then don't hang around them.  It just isn't worth it.  (Although with Tiffany, you might give her a second shot, but I'd have to know more details about her to say for sure)

Anyway, high schools tends to have those kind of people.  I've never experienced that myself, but it's easy to imagine.  Some people mature slower than others and some...just, are brain-damaged I guess and will always resort to their petty nonsense.  Just step above those kind of people and be the bigger man.  They refuse to listen to you, so why waste time on them?  I'm sure you have more important things to do than to lose sleep over a jerk. 

[Kilo]

I agree with all comments posted on here...they definitely don't sound like they are very good friends and I don't think you have to apologize for anything. I'm sorry you have to put up with such ignorance. You're standing up for how you feel and what you believe in and if they can't stand beside you, they can stand behind you.

[Arch]

People like this are maddening. A pacifist, upon meeting them, might not stay one for long.

But let me be blunt. They don't sound like very good friends to me. They sound like immature, self-centered bigots. In other words, typical cliquish teenagers. (And, no, I don't think all young people are like that. And most of the ones who are tend to grow up, at least a little, in their twenties and thirties.)

If you want to keep them in your life, you can put up with their crap if you want to (I'm not sure why), or you can try to educate them--and run the risk that they will never respond.

If you know who you are and don't like hanging around people who refuse to accept you or treat you with any basic respect, then you might start looking around for better friends. I suspect that these girls will only frustrate the heck out of you and make you angry. Do you need that?

[GnomeKid]

ew. 
Thats one of the reasons I think that college is a much better place to come out... Many [most] high schoolers aren't mature enough to handle such an issue with any sort of tact or sense of understanding.

High schoolers are generally [whether they'll admit it or not] afraid of what the school as a whole will say about them rather than hurting a friends feelings "temporarily" That is my opinion of why your friend tiffany went about things the way she did after the lesbian comment by her friend sarah.. She'd rather hurt your feelings for a moment than have sarah spread it to the school that shes a lesbian "too."  Why anyone would jump to that conclusion is beyond me, but very little about high school drama is logical. 

In high school an individual will generally get ->-bleeped-<- for accepting/consorting with someone who is outside of the norm.  After high school an individual will generally be looked down on [and sometimes mocked themselves] for being hateful or not accepting people due to such trivial things as gender identity or sexual orientation.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that they're stupid, immature, high schoolers.  You're clearly above and beyond them in maturity [and probably intelligence] by already having had to analyze your identity and sexuality to the extent that you have, and by having the "balls" to come out to them.  Yea it sucks now, but someday you'll be the ->-bleeped-<- and they'll be dreary everyday "normals"... theyve never been my cup of tea personally.

[FebruaryFalls]

I'd recommend avoiding both of them. They will only lead to trouble and if you continue to fued, they could have the motivation to make things very difficult for you.

Teenage girls are horrible little people when they want to be.

[Gilmorton]

You need to try and stay calm when dealing with idiots like that because, once you've lost your temper, you've lost the argument and they have the upper hand. They do sound like typical immature teenage girls (believe me, I know - I work in a school full of them), particularly the second once who chimed in with the first - "Yeah, me too..."

I recommend you avoid them for a while and refuse to rise to any provocation. Easier said than done, I know.

Gil

[Farm Boy]

That sucks.   I'm sorry, but they don't sound like friends at all.  If you want to try to salvage it, you need to have a serious (calm, unheated) talk with them and explain things if you haven't already.  If they refuse to listen and still treat you this way, the best thing you could do would be to stop associating with them.  You don't need destructive people in your life, especially those wearing the guise of 'friend.'

[Kentrie]

I still talk to Tiffany, I don't bring anything about me up though. I won't talk to Sarah, she came up to me and was trying to be all nice but I just looked at her and started talking to someone else.

[Arch]

I still talk to Tiffany, I don't bring anything about me up though. I won't talk to Sarah, she came up to me and was trying to be all nice but I just looked at her and started talking to someone else.

Maybe Tiffany is salvageable. You seem to think she might be. Sarah said some nasty things to you, though. From my perspective, she had no business telling you how to define yourself. And calling someone a freak is just vicious. I really think you're better off without her.

[confused]

people like this ...person .. dont worth you attention or time , dont get upset over that ,, because people who think that way also think bad stuff about every single group of people , they might get more mature someday yes , but imo they stay the same on the inside , i dont think they ever get really happy .
personally i prefer ignoring people like that and never get in an argument (or even a conversation) with them , but ofcourse i have to sometimes . best way i could find to stop mean people at their limits is to notice everyone's greatest insecurities and use it against them when that happens
anyway , just dont be mad about it , she's really not worth your concern , trust me , it's not like what she "thinks" (or says) matters because obviously she cant do that very much. *hugs*

[Elijah3291]

sorry but they seem like really (REALLY) dumb little girls who love drama cause they are bored with their lives.

I would just ignore them, stop talking to them, maybe make some guy friends, or less drama filled girl friends.