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Have you ever struggled with the idea of brain sex?

Started by Alex201, January 15, 2011, 09:34:00 PM

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Alex201

Like...being worried that your actual brain sex is that of your birth gender? I know that is a fear of mine.
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Sharky

To me this reads: I'm not sure if I am really trans or not.
My brains gender isn't inline with my physical sex, that's why I'm trans.
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Alex201

Quote from: Sharky on January 15, 2011, 09:53:49 PM
To me this reads: I'm not sure if I am really trans or not.
My brains gender isn't inline with my physical sex, that's why I'm trans.
yes I'm not sure. Sometimes I just wanna say " ->-bleeped-<- it, I'm gonna be a guy even if I have a female brain". If I am cisgender..then I so envy transgender people.
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TheAetherealMeadow

Brain sex simply refers to sexually dimorphic traits that have to do with how your brain functions. It has nothing to do with gender identity. It's very common for males to have a "female" brain sex and vice versa.
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Sharky

What is there to envy about being trans?

Quote from: TheAetherealMeadow on January 15, 2011, 11:09:55 PM
Brain sex simply refers to sexually dimorphic traits that have to do with how your brain functions. It has nothing to do with gender identity. It's very common for males to have a "female" brain sex and vice versa.

You don't think how your brain works influences your gender identity?
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SnailPace

Alex, I'd like to suggest something.

Why don't you make a list with two columns.  One column is titled "Reasons I think my brain is female" and the other "Reasons I think my brain is male"

When writing this list, don't worry about being politically correct or factual.  This is all your own feelings.

Then read over your list.  You could choose to post this list or not.

Here are some things I think you should keep in mind when reading over your completed list:
- Men can be interested in "typically female" things and activities and still be real men.  Women can be interested in typically male things and still be real women.
- Men can have many female friends and still be real men.  Women can have many male friends and still be real women.
- Woman can do a man can do, and vice versa.
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GnomeKid

It seems that you are really having a lot of trouble coming to grips with whether or not you are trans.  That is totally understandable.  Its a big thing to come around to.  It takes a lot of work if you plan to undertake a transition.  I've seen you make a lot of threads to this general effect.   It seems, to me, as though you must be trans, but that certainly isn't for me to say. 

Have you been to see a therapist about this issue?  If I were you I'd try to find a gender therapist to help you work though this.  Gender therapists are specialized in the area and are not going to shoot down the trans idea as craziness [not all therapists would anyway, but it is my opinion (and just logical) that you're more likely to get someone who is accepting and actually going to help you if you just go straight for a gender therapist]

All that being said, I don't think any cisgendered person would envy someone who is trans.

Also, I thought I should add that there is no reason for you to force yourself into the gender binary if you don't feel that you belong at either end.  I feel that almost everyone is a little andro.  It could be that you're strictly and andro and not really "trans" 
food for thought

to answer your question though:  I don't think I've really ever even considered the concept of brain sex as applying to me.
I solemnly swear I am up to no good.

"Oh what a cute little girl, or boy if you grow up and feel thats whats inside you" - Liz Lemon

Happy to be queer!    ;)
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spacial

I really don't know what Brain Sex is, to be honest. I can follow the reasoning, but my understanding of brain struture suggests that it's just an organ that performs a function, much like any other.

I know what I am and have always known. I can't explain that, I can't find any logic to it. I don't know of any test to demonstrate it. The best I can say is that I and those like me are not a threat to anyone else, so there really is no justifcation for us to suppress ourselves or be oppressed.

You should decide what you want to do with your own life. It isn't an all or nothing, thank goodness. You can live, more or less as you choose.

Some have chosen to aim for a full transision. Some look for a partial expression. Some for a part time expression. What matters is how you feel.
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xAndrewx

Quote from: spacial on January 17, 2011, 06:36:27 AM
You should decide what you want to do with your own life. It isn't an all or nothing, thank goodness. You can live, more or less as you choose.

Some have chosen to aim for a full transition. Some look for a partial expression. Some for a part time expression. What matters is how you feel.

I just thought this could use being said again because it is entirely correct. The feeling I get when I read your posts (like how I think you are feeling or whatever) is confused and rushed. Gnomekid is right, you sound trans to us but only you know that. How's it going with your folks? Have you managed to push them any closer to getting you to see a proper therapist? That is what it sounds you need. What if you are genderqueer or andro or even if you are transgender. Suggestion... write down what makes you think you aren't trans. Post it or don't but write anything that makes you think you are not trans. Do you have anyone outside of your life that you can talk to such as a guidance councilor or anything? Someone that can talk to your parents on your behalf to explain to them that you need to see a proper councilor?

regan

"Brain Sex" is just the biological explaination for being transgendered.  Its a means for us to say we're not crazy, its our brain driving us to do these things - as if somehow the anti-trans community will suddenly say "OMG, now I understand" and all the barriers to social transition and universal access to true health care for transgender medical issues (including puberty blockers) will suddenly become reality.  Its no different then when researchers spent countless hours searching for the "gay gene".

The truth is we know so little about the human brain operates, we might as well know nothing about it.  As for brain sex, what about CAIS females and other such intersex conditions?  Does the 'brain sex" argument work for them?

The reality is no one on really knows what causes one boy to live as a boy without question, one boy to like being a boy who wears dresses, and one boy to suffer deeply in what he feels is the wrong body.  It doesn't make our feelings any less valid.
Our biograhies are our own and we need to accept our own diversity without being ashamed that we're somehow not trans enough.
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jmaxley

Do you want to be trans or do you want to be a male?  In my case, I don't really want to be trans.  However, I do want to be a male, which makes me trans.
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Alex201

Quote from: jmaxley on January 17, 2011, 10:52:40 AM
Do you want to be trans or do you want to be a male?  In my case, I don't really want to be trans.  However, I do want to be a male, which makes me trans.
I want to be male...and the only way I feel justified to be male is if I'm trans...that way I will know I have a male brain (or whatever that is). I don't want to be someone who wants to be male but is trapped with a "female brain". Then I would feel like a fake male.
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Alex201

QuoteHow's it going with your folks? Have you managed to push them any closer to getting you to see a proper therapist?
I'm working on them...but I doubt they will budge. I'm thinking of waiting till I move out.
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jmaxley

Quote from: Alex201 on January 17, 2011, 11:32:05 AM
I want to be male...and the only way I feel justified to be male is if I'm trans...that way I will know I have a male brain (or whatever that is). I don't want to be someone who wants to be male but is trapped with a "female brain". Then I would feel like a fake male.

Your feelings are justified and valid, whether you have an official trans label or not, whether the people around you agree with you or not--how you feel is valid.  Right now you're around people who don't want you to be male, who will do their best to convince you that you're female.  When you're able to move out, you'll have the space to experiment and work on being yourself and see what fits for you.
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spacial

Perlita.

Thank you so much for that information. I didn't know about that, though I have heard there are areas that vary.

I will do some research. I wonder if this can only be measured post mortum?

Thank again.
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regan

Quote from: spacial on January 17, 2011, 01:54:38 PM
Perlita.

Thank you so much for that information. I didn't know about that, though I have heard there are areas that vary.

I will do some research. I wonder if this can only be measured post mortum?

Thank again.

As technology improves, they are able to do some analysis pre-mortem, the flaw with the post-mortem testing is that scientists are unable to say with any certainty if its due to the hormones or if the structures were the same preHRT.

Its just a theory, just like all the other theories to explain why we are the way we are.
Our biograhies are our own and we need to accept our own diversity without being ashamed that we're somehow not trans enough.
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Shang

Yes, I've struggled a bit.  What if my "brain" or whatever really is female?  Would my feelings of being male be any less valid?  I don't think so, though some may disagree.    If I did what SnailPace suggested, then I would have a whole list of stereotypical female things under the "female" side because I enjoy doing so many things that are considered "female", but I still feel male and I identify as male, just with a few extra bits.
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Britney♥Bieber

Based on your posts I feel like you're so confused. I'm really confused at times, but I'm transitioning because I have no interest in being a boy. I never have, it never made me happy or comfortable. Becoming a girl makes me happy and comfortable. If I was a boy I wouldn't look under my shirt and see my growing chest and be really happy. The bigger my chest gets the more excited I get lol, I've always had boob envy but I didn't realize I was envying the girls, I thought I could just tell a cute pair from a not cute pair lol.

Like suggested already, I suggest making a list. Can you imagine yourself being a man 10 years from now? Can you imagine yourself being a woman? I thought about stuff like that forever, still do in fact. Like I would think about clothes I would wear in different situations. In an office, in a club, in a grocery store, hanging out around the house, school....looking and feeling like a girl was actually something I desired. Looking and feeling like a boy wasn't. That's when I realized I've always felt trapped in male clothes, and that if I had to wear suits, and dress shoes and slacks forever I would NEVER want to get dressed up. But I like getting dressed up. And it wasn't JUST about clothes for me. I started thinking about relationships I wanted to have. I've identified as gay for about 6 years, not anymore obviously, but when I did, all I knew was that I liked men. And I wanted to be with them. The more I thought about it, I realized woah I don't want to be with a man as another man, not that I don't like same sex couples I actually think its so hot when guys make out lol. But I realized I really longed to be someones girlfriend, wife. Looking into my future considering how things would go if I got married as a man or woman and getting married as a woman was how I felt. Pretty dress, bouquet, the word bride even feels better. Something that helps me feel better, is when I get really sad I find myself saying/thinking "Ugh I hate being trans. Why can't I just be a girl? I just want to be a real girl" I feel like I'm sure I'm a girl mentally, because of how badly I want to be/feel like I am one

I could go on forever but I don't want to hi-jack your thread anymore, if you wanna chat shoot me a PM and we can talk more in detail and maybe you can work out your confusion. Good luck bb. And hey, if you are just a cis girl who likes to go by Alex/he sometimes or all the time, that's okay too. As long as you always stay the nice person you are. Don't let confusion get you down. If you are THAT confused just dress how you want and go by the name/pro nouns you want. Do whatever makes you happy.

jmaxley

Quote from: LukasGabriel on January 17, 2011, 02:33:02 PM
If I did what SnailPace suggested, then I would have a whole list of stereotypical female things under the "female" side because I enjoy doing so many things that are considered "female"
I'd have a whole list of things considered female too.  I get the "fake male" feeling alot.  Partly because my body is female.  Partly because my gender identity leans more towards genderqueer than strictly male.  I've never felt like a woman but don't usually feel like a man either.  I can feel masculine or feminine though, but prefer feeling masculine a whole lot more.  Most of the time I feel like neither.  I'd still much rather have a male body though.  I HATE having a female body.
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spacial

Quote from: regan on January 17, 2011, 02:20:05 PM
As technology improves, they are able to do some analysis pre-mortem, the flaw with the post-mortem testing is that scientists are unable to say with any certainty if its due to the hormones or if the structures were the same preHRT.

Its just a theory, just like all the other theories to explain why we are the way we are.

Thank you for that clarification.

When I was nursing there were a number of theories where brain structure was being related to various mental illnesses. The flaw was that most of these tended to be post mortum. But equally, that they tended to be post treatment. Also, I couldn't find a lot of data relating to people wthout symptoms who either had the same abnormalities or didn't. It all seemed rather hopeful, to be honest.

I would hope the technology had progressed in 20 or 30 years. But equally, you will know as I do, that often, preliminary conclusions are announced which owe more to an eagerness to be the first than to the a proper annalysis of the results.

I will spend some time looking at Bed Nucleolus of Stria Terminalis. Hopefully, if I have any questions or queries, I can post them and get some opinions.
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