Quote from: Gregg on January 20, 2011, 05:19:58 PM
Would you (assuming that you are a straight/bisexual man) date someone who identifies as lesbian? Not bisexual or bi-curious, a lesbian who is just as grossed out by another guy's dick as straight men.
If I liked girls, I would have difficulty dating a lesbian. The dysphoria is bad enough as it is without dating someone who is only attracted to females. Others say "hell yeah, I'd date a lesbian!" It would make the relationship strained (in my opinion) because the man would have the constant thought that he isn't being seen as a man because he is dating a woman who only likes other women.
No, I would not. I have before, ive only had one good experience but we didnt work out for seperate reasons.
Im pansexual, but I recently dated a hardcore lesbian, the kind that "is just as grossed out by another guy's dick as straight men". Rainbow flashing, proud gay, whos in love with women and women only. She's a man hater, but we met just as I was coming out to my friends. So in the beginning she liked me because she saw me as a female, my friends were still calling me by my femle nickname. I was already binding and presenting as male, but I guess she saw me as just masculine with a small chest. She even noticed my chest, and asked bout it. I tried explaining, telling her/coming out, she really didnt get it at frist. Idk what I was thinking. So later I still tried informing her of who I was and what was to come, eventually she kind of got it. More so then my friends at the time did. She started using my preferred name more, male pronouns as much as she possibly could remember, and called me her boyfriend. I really appreciated that, cause in a sense it let the world know that she saw me as male. Only problem was she didnt want to let go of that lesbianism, I didnt expect her to. And when it came to sex, well you know she wanted to do lesbian things. I feel that people who strongly hold onto their sexual orientation, are JUST that, all about sexuality. Sex and body parts are most important to them, not who you really are. This is where we butt heads, she wanted to do things I didnt want her to. She said I was being selfish cause I wouldnt let her touch me, she said its the only way she knew how to make love and I wouldnt let her. She said shed never say that she would suck my dick or jack me off. Which made me cringe, and become VERY uncomfortable. I never ever took off my binder with her, esp not during sex. I figured she only liked me because I had girl parts. Thats all she wanted, thats all she fantacised about. I mean thats what lesbians are all about right? Boobs and down there. I then was conflicted on how she really saw me. Let me get this straight, a lesbian man hater, dating a transGUY..no thanks, only reason shes dating you is for girl sex. Even though she'd tell her friends she was a lesbian with a boyfriend, dating a guy..I couldnt do it, she really didnt understand and was selfish about her sexual needs.
What made things worse was that she'd say things like you act like more of a girl than me, and hurtful things that make me feel less of a guy. I guess assuming that im supposed to be just like the typical man. But im a little queer and not very masculine, im me and she just really ddnt understand that I could be a guy who likes girls and is a bit feminine/emotional.