I am going to list two incidents here and hopefully some people will begin to understand why TS people are tired of being lumped in with this "All Gender Movement."
1. I have had a routine of going out with friends to a restaurant late at night on the weekends. Most of the time we will go to one of two Denny's in the Phoenix area. One of these Denny's is known to be the "gay Denny's." The other one is just a regular Denny's. Depending on what my friends and I decide to do we either go to one or the other so both have seen me for awhile as a regular customer. I have always presented female in these locations as well (even before going full time).
Close to six months ago, I went to one of these Denny's and there was an issue. I often use the bathroom while I'm there but this time I never even went in the bathroom. When I'm leaving, a new manager comes out and tells me that I cannot use the women's room. I argued with him and the next day called the higher-up manager who quickly resolved the issue. I still frequent both venues and have no issue since. That particular manager in question was immediately transferred to another Denny's but has recently returned to the original one in question. I can't say if that was coincidence or not. Guess which one the discrimination happened at? The gay Denny's. Want to know why? Because regularly a bunch of drag queens go there to eat who clearly look like men, talk like men, and act like men. A complaint had been generated about a man in the woman's restroom although the complaint was not directed towards me. Funny how at the other Denny's (the regular one) nobody has ever had an issue despite the fact that the servers (and likely a few regular customers) know I'm trans. Well I have been in this woman's room at the gay Denny's before only to witness cross-dressing/drag queen men enter it, talk in loud male voices, and then urinate in the toilet while standing. Then you wonder why genetic women get upset and now I'm being discriminated against because I'm being lumped into that category.
2. My employer has been working with me throughout my transition. My direct boss has been extremely helpful. My co-workers and superiors have gradually seen the changes such as my hair growing out, nail polish, female shoes, etc. They had seen me present full female on two Halloweens. When I knew it was getting close to going full time I mentioned it to the boss who was very supportive. HR made the decision that as long as I dress appropriately according to the female dress code then there is no concern. I cannot officially use a female name until it has been legally changed but co-workers are free to call me by my preferred name. I must use the men's room until I am ready to change to the women's room but that I should talk to HR first prior to doing so. My boss suggested after I went full time to give it some more time before switching bathrooms to make it easier for everyone to adjust. No problem.
Recently, I found out that I cannot use the women's room until I've had SRS. I told them I did not agree with that and that it needs to be looked into further. I met with HR who did seem very supportive, provided them with my diagnosis letter from my therapist, and they will talk to the corporate HR/legal department to see what they can do. The prospect looks good so I won't call this discrimination. But there is a reason there is even a question about it in the first place. Many years ago a man had been working there who suddenly decided out of the blue to show up as a female. From the reports that I heard he looked like a drag queen with exaggerated feminine appearances. The man goes right into the women's room and it causes people to get upset. This person was changing his gender on a near daily basis. For a couple of days he would be a woman and use the women's room, then for the rest of the week he would be a man and go to the men's room. He smarted off at managers and co-workers when they misgendered him. When it became an HR issue he got angry at them and demanded that he was being discriminated against. Thanks to this idiot I explained to HR that this is not just some hobby or phase that I'm in but that it's a medical condition and something permanent. Naturally it is harder for people to accept what I have as a legitimate medical condition when a man previously decides to make an unprofessional and inappropriate mockery of gender in the workplace.
Time and time again, this is why TS people can't get rights. Insurance companies consider SRS, hormones, therapy, etc. all cosmetic or optional. This is thanks again to people such as in the two examples above whose gender identity and expression are choices and behaviors, not medical conditions. It seems like every time me, another TS, or an IS is close to getting equal treatment someone from this "all gender movement" has to behave in a way that causes others to de-legitimize our needs and experiences. You can see it in the media as well. The public does not see a TS as just another woman on television. They think a TS is someone similar to the above examples.
The "accept everybody" movement does nothing to get people the equal rights they need. People who behave as mentioned above demanding acceptance when their behavior is not worthy of respect not only don't get accepted but cause those with legitimate needs to be discriminated against. Enough said.
