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Gee. Thanks, mom.

Started by Rebekah with a K-A-H, January 22, 2011, 11:20:42 PM

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Rebekah with a K-A-H

Waiter: Ma'am, ma'am, ma'am.
Mother dearest: Oh, he wants this.
Waiter: Sir, sir, sir.

Well.  Not going back to that restaurant for a while.

Mum and I had a "chat" afterwards.  That was fun.
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Melody Maia

That happened to me last night.

My friend: To waitress, "Can you bring him this wine?"
Me: mouthing the word "she"
My friend: turns red and feels awful

It happens. You shouldn't feel you can't go back.
and i know that i'm never alone
and i know that my heart is my home
Every missing piece of me
I can find in a melody



O
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Rebekah with a K-A-H

It's got to be tough for people who have known you for 18 years to suddenly refer to you with a different name, in a different way, all the time.  I didn't get mad or anything, but, considering the way I was dressed, getting outed was a little embarrassing. >.>
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Melody Maia

Yeah, met too. Boyfriend T, bra, full face of makeup. Took an hour and half to get ready and look as passable as possible, and pffft, all for naught in the very first interaction with the waitress.
and i know that i'm never alone
and i know that my heart is my home
Every missing piece of me
I can find in a melody



O
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azSam

Errrr! I know how frustrating that is! My mom did something similar at a grocery store one day. They asked if they could take the groceries out to the car for us, my mother replies, "No he can get it ... no wait errr, she!", and I was like... really mom? REALLY? Did you just get it wrong, then correct it right in front of them like that?

I walked out briskly, and waited a couple of weeks before I went back there.
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JenJen2011

Ha! It happens to all of us. It just takes time for some people to get use to, especially parents.
I thought it would be harder for my nieces and nephews to remember new name
and correct pronouns to use but to my surprise they never failed me once.
"You have one life to live so live it right"
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Melody Maia

Just be glad your mom's native language isn't spanish. If you think pronouns are a problem, so many words in spanish are gendered it is ridiculous. Yo estoy vestido, Yo estoy vestida. Both mean "I am dressed," but the first is masculine and the second is feminine. Makes speaking the simplest phrases and getting it right quite a chore.
and i know that i'm never alone
and i know that my heart is my home
Every missing piece of me
I can find in a melody



O
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JenJen2011

Actually my mom's native language is Spanish and so is my dad's LOL!
"You have one life to live so live it right"
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Melody Maia

Quote from: JenJen2011 on January 24, 2011, 10:42:47 AM
Actually my mom's native language is Spanish and so is my dad's LOL!

In that case, you have my sympathies!
and i know that i'm never alone
and i know that my heart is my home
Every missing piece of me
I can find in a melody



O
  •  

Glenn

My mom is getting a crash course in pronouns!

Since I have been bringing all my Transgender friends home with me. I invite her over to chat. She slips up says He in reference to me and they says. SHE! It's working!!! Mom is calling me She more and more.  Dad is an issue.  He's sticks to my Male name and tells me when I have long hair a bra and pierced ears he'll go with she.
So I went out and got my ears pierced. 
Look out Poppa your daughter is going to hold you to your word!

hugs all Simone
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Rebekah with a K-A-H

Ooh, Spanish is fun. It's my native language too!
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Maddie Secutura

It does kinda suck when that happens.  I was at a Halloween party and it at first it was fine, everyone using the right pronouns.  Then one of my friend slipped up.  And then...he.  All...night...long.  The worst part is that a slip up is your worst enemy and the offender doesn't usually know they did it.


  •  

GinaDouglas

It sucks, but you have to correct people sometimes.

I was at church, preparing for a party, and one of my friends came up and asked me to open a jar.  I said, in my most feminine voice, "I'll try."

But the other thing you have to think about is, if a group of people is using wrong pronouns in your presence, is it happening because they don't even try to use the right references in your absence?
It's easier to change your sex and gender in Iran, than it is in the United States.  Way easier.

Please read my novel, Dragonfly and the Pack of Three, available on Amazon - and encourage your local library to buy it too! We need realistic portrayals of trans people in literature, for all our sakes
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Serra

My mother's still learning in a private setting, and we don't do much in public (we both have hefty work loads).  We did finally get together to see a movie about two weeks ago, and I was so used to her using [boy-name] that when I heard someone say my name I just figured it was for someone else.  Turned out she had been calling my name for almost a full minute. XP
Rawr.
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Britney♥Bieber

Yeah it happens! =[ Sunday night I went out to dinner with a gf after work, I've known her and been friends with her all my life but we were never bff, we just see each other cuz we work in the same store. Well anyways, we were at Panda Express ordering, getting mam as usual. And this friend is the best when it comes to correct name and pronouns, she ended up saying I'll have what he got and then shot me a look so fast I almost missed it, she just looked at me so sadly and mouthed "sorry :(" and I was like it's okay :) Luckily it didn't phase them :)

Rebekah with a K-A-H

Quote from: GinaDouglas on January 26, 2011, 06:05:48 PM
It sucks, but you have to correct people sometimes.

I was at church, preparing for a party, and one of my friends came up and asked me to open a jar.  I said, in my most feminine voice, "I'll try."

But the other thing you have to think about is, if a group of people is using wrong pronouns in your presence, is it happening because they don't even try to use the right references in your absence?

Eurgh.  Way to give me something else to be paranoid about.
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Dawn D.

My mother is 74, healthy as a horse and likely to live well past a 100! The worst thing is, she'll never change. Always says he, him and his. Even if I get pretty upset with her. No apologies, nothing, Nada! She just refers to that ol' dog and new tricks B.S.! Even my wife has come down pretty hard on her about it. Yet, she still refuses. Freakin' stubborn Arky, lol!


Dawn 
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