Frustrated with Doctor and NHS

[Bowsey]

So I went to see my doctor in September as my MtF Gender Dysphoria got so bad I was having anxiety attacks at night, after about 5 years of struggling on my own. It was soo good to tell someone about it, especially as I thought it was someone who could help me. This then led me to tell my parents and then recently my sisters. I was told that I would be referred to the local Community Mental Health Centre who would then refer me to Charing Cross.

So I finally had enough and went to see her today to get her to find out more information about what was going on. She said she did the referral and would chase it up for me. Later today I also phoned up the local Community Mental Health Centre who said that they had received no referral for me and that when they do receive a referral they send a letter to patients within 1 week.

So at the moment I am just sooo Frustrated. I feel like no one actually cares and understands what I am going through.

To top it all off I am moving away tomorrow as I'm starting a new job, so might have to do the whole thigh all over again. What a waste of 4 months. Starting each day feeling one way and having to dress and fit in with the social norms for a different gender is very draining.

Things can only get better in 2011.

[Sarah B]

Hi Bowsey

I have just read your posts and you are not alone and there are many people here on Susan's who have similar problems and will help you, in anyway that they can.

Its good to hear that you are finally doing something about your gender problems and seeking help from your doctor and counsellor.  It is also nice to hear that you have let your family know and it is also heart warming that your family accepts what you have said to them.

However, in your post you have mentioned that the community health centre has not been notified and you have spoken to your doctor about it.  Just find out what has happened, because you need the help and you do not want to be ignored.

In another post a member of Susan's was having a problem and I gave them a link, which has to do with how to get what you want a lot more quicker than just going down the NHS route just alone.  The thread that discusses this is called "The NHS route UK".

You have a new job which will allow you to get the treatment you need and the means to do what you want to achieve in life.

Take care and all the best for the future

Kind regards
Sarah B

[pebbles]

I personally stopped listening to them and doing as much for myself that I can, I can't see how any transperson can endure the NHS system.

[LordKAT]

Distinctly why I am not in favor of single payer health care and not for simple government care either. Better controls on health insurance but not owned and/or operated by government.

[spacial]

Distinctly why I am not in favor of single payer health care and not for simple government care either. Better controls on health insurance but not owned and/or operated by government.

That would be an ideal, but would need to be backed by similar controls on the amount hospitals and such can charge.

The problem is, these controls will offend the free market.

[LordKAT]

You kid yourself if you think that US is a totally free market. There are price controls on everything else from the food you eat to the clothes you wear and the fuel you burn. What difference if more things have price controls.


Figure this out tho, if you can only get $50 for a surgery cause no one will pay more than that, sooner or later, it will only cost $50. Gross exaggeration, but still shows the point.

[spacial]

I apologise. By Free Market, I was referring to the tendency, rather than the practice. I perhaps should have written the term with capital F and M

There is, of course, no real free market any more than there is any real demoncracy. The law and fiscal systems, invariably are weighted in favour of the higher end of the commercial sector.

Much like the issue of gun control, it is difficult to have any proper discussion on the issues here, opinions are views are so polarised. Positions, frequently backed by claims of national identity.

The British NHS is a cobbled together, set of compromises, where, the worst aspects of British society, namely the chase to achieve class based autonomy, are so ingrained as to make much of the exercise irrelevant.

What is significant is that, even though the NHS spends only a small proportion of its budget on patient care, it is still enormously cheaper than the US system, per head of population.

But as they say, you go your problems, we got ours.

[spacial]

So I went to see my doctor in September as my MtF Gender Dysphoria got so bad I was having anxiety attacks at night, after about 5 years of struggling on my own. It was soo good to tell someone about it, especially as I thought it was someone who could help me. This then led me to tell my parents and then recently my sisters. I was told that I would be referred to the local Community Mental Health Centre who would then refer me to Charing Cross.

So I finally had enough and went to see her today to get her to find out more information about what was going on. She said she did the referral and would chase it up for me. Later today I also phoned up the local Community Mental Health Centre who said that they had received no referral for me and that when they do receive a referral they send a letter to patients within 1 week.

So at the moment I am just sooo Frustrated. I feel like no one actually cares and understands what I am going through.

To top it all off I am moving away tomorrow as I'm starting a new job, so might have to do the whole thigh all over again. What a waste of 4 months. Starting each day feeling one way and having to dress and fit in with the social norms for a different gender is very draining.

Things can only get better in 2011.

Since you're moving to a new job, you can look for a new GP.

It will still be pot luck of course, but you may strike lucky.

If there are any transgender organisatins in your new area, you might ask there, which GPs are ammenable.

[Ruben]

I feel your frustration with the NHS; I went to see them LAST YEAR about therapy, I got an initial interview at a psych center [took AGES to get THAT far] and they said I'd get a referral after to go further with it. I got a letter a week later, but just a correspondance copy of a letter they sent to my GP about the interview and stuff, and nothing in it suggested I'd be ignored, but lo and behold, I'm almost a year down the line and awaiting the referral still.

I'm gonna go back into the GPs and bust some heads, I think. 

[Cruelladeville]

My involvement with the NHS for TG related issues was minimal...

Though my HRT comes primarily from them, as do all my well-woman check-ups... breast scans and such...

But for dentistry, and all the ops I've ever had to undertake... my own funds and the private route is the only way forward if you have a time-line agenda of your own...

If you want it all for 'free' the wait and hurdles take ages, and oft its a postcode lottery as to what/if and maybes that it actually happens....

This is stressful beyond belief and my heart goes out to any poor soul negotiating that...

[Bowsey]

Update.
Well I went to see my GP again in January who didn't know why I hadn't received an appointment and said she would contact them again. I also contacted the local CMHC (Community Mental Health Centre) who said they hadn't received anything from her.

Long story short I had an appointment on Thursday. Which I was excited and nervous about, which was an initial assessment.
I left feeling a bit like they didn't fully understand what I was saying to them, didn't understand gender issues. I explained to them the feeling of being awkward in my own body, that to me my outward appearance is not me. I explained that I feel more comfortable as a female rather than a male. And didn't know how to explain it further. Then he doesn't say anything and I say I don't know how to explain it further. He then says do you not know how to explain it or not know what it is. That really annoyed me.
They seemed to focus on other things like whether I have had any relationships and if I was attracted to males or females, rather than about me as a person.
They are writing to my GP who then will contact me with what there assessment is.
I left feeling a bit deflated because I felt I couldn't get them to fully understand what I was telling them.
Hopefully they were only there to see I am normal and aren't Schizoid or delusional, before referring me to the GIC who will actually understand me much better

[Nygeel]

I know of somebody who was refereed to Charing Cross. He had been seeing Doctor Curtis and stopped taking hormones due to inability to afford them. The people at Charing Cross denied him any services because he didn't have a job. He goes back in June for a reassessment, and cannot go back to Doctor Curtis if he wanted to (some rule about only being allowed one doctor).

I don't know much about the health care system anywhere (including where I live) but it seems like most systems are screwed up when it comes to transgender care.

[spacial]

Bowsey

I suspect the problem is, your local mental health services don't have anyone interested in gender issues.

Initially ignoring your GP referral is not unusual. I had a patient with brittle diabetus who couldn't leave her home because of mobility problems. After about 4 GP referrals which came to nothing, I went to the diabetic clinci myself to be met by some young thing who told me they don't do home visits.

That is just an example of what happens I'm afraid. But the responsibility is down to your GP. Try to remain calm and collect as much information of Charring Cross and other Gender Clinics as you can. Take these to him and ask him to refer you directly.

Sorry, but the NHS is all about pushing and shoving. The main thing is to keep very calm and always show respct and gratitude.

[Rock_chick]

I wated three months for any action for the NHS, got fed up and then went private. if you can afford it, I would recomend this route, yes you do have to stump up the money yourself, but you are in control. On my second visit to london, Dr Perring prescribed all the hormones and anti-androgens I wanted. If i was going the NHS route I'd still be waiting to find out if I'd actually get funding to to to charing cross.

depending on circumstance it may nt be an option, but if you have the money to do it, go private.

Here's his website. http://www.optimalhealth.org.uk/

[Sarah B]

I wated three months for any action for the NHS, got fed up and then went private. if you can afford it, I would recomend this route, yes you do have to stump up the money yourself, but you are in control. On my second visit to london, Dr Perring prescribed all the hormones and anti-androgens I wanted. If i was going the NHS route I'd still be waiting to find out if I'd actually get funding to to to charing cross.

depending on circumstance it may nt be an option, but if you have the money to do it, go private.

Here's his website. http://www.optimalhealth.org.uk/

What Helena said, and still have your name down for the GIC.  This allows you you to get all the hormones and surgery letters and still allow you to have surgery if you are unable to afford it.

Kind regards
Sarah B

[Bowsey]

Bowsey

I suspect the problem is, your local mental health services don't have anyone interested in gender issues.

Initially ignoring your GP referral is not unusual. I had a patient with brittle diabetus who couldn't leave her home because of mobility problems. After about 4 GP referrals which came to nothing, I went to the diabetic clinci myself to be met by some young thing who told me they don't do home visits.

That is just an example of what happens I'm afraid. But the responsibility is down to your GP. Try to remain calm and collect as much information of Charring Cross and other Gender Clinics as you can. Take these to him and ask him to refer you directly.



Sorry, but the NHS is all about pushing and shoving. The main thing is to keep very calm and always show respct and gratitude.

Thanks for your reply  At the moment I am going to wait to see what they think, since they said they will write to my GP who will then write to me. I have been waiting since September for this appointment, which was only on Thursday, so will probably here back in a month or so. Especially since he said they have to talk it through with a supervisor as they were still training.
I am very grateful that they have seen me and sooo grateful for my supportive family

I wated three months for any action for the NHS, got fed up and then went private. if you can afford it, I would recomend this route, yes you do have to stump up the money yourself, but you are in control. On my second visit to london, Dr Perring prescribed all the hormones and anti-androgens I wanted. If i was going the NHS route I'd still be waiting to find out if I'd actually get funding to to to charing cross.

depending on circumstance it may nt be an option, but if you have the money to do it, go private.

Here's his website. http://www.optimalhealth.org.uk/

Thank you for your reply. I haven't actually looked at the private option. I have seen some of the figures of the costs posted which kind of put me off. I have just started working after university and already have about £22000 worth of student loans to pay off from my salary, so don't think I could afford it.

Rachel

[regan]

Thank you for your reply. I haven't actually looked at the private option. I have seen some of the figures of the costs posted which kind of put me off. I have just started working after university and already have about £22000 worth of student loans to pay off from my salary, so don't think I could afford it.

I don't know how it works in the UK, but in the US there are various "hardship" options that you can use in paying off student loans that might free up some cash for you.

[Bowsey]

I don't know how it works in the UK, but in the US there are various "hardship" options that you can use in paying off student loans that might free up some cash for you.

In the UK the amount you pay off at a specific time is based upon your salary. You don't pay anything until you start earning over £15,000 per annum. I'm earning considerably more than that, but with this recession, the money just seems to disappear out of my account. So you get no help.
Even though everyone complains about the NHS I can't at the moment as I haven't waited too long so far and it is all funded for me. It just takes persistence.
Ask me again in a few months though