What if this is the wrong question? What if androgyny is just as normal as feeling all male or all female, kind of like being bi-sexual is just as normal as being all hetero or all gay or lesbian? Gay activists have pointed out it should be asked, "why are people (sometimes) heterosexual?"
What if the real question is, "what causes people to feel cis-gendered?"
Why do many people believe there are only two genders, and you have to be one or the other?
Not, "Why are we different?", but "why do 'they' think everyone has to be the same - to conform?"
I do not want either to discount or to engage in the biological argument, as interesting and important as it is. I am bring up a social question.
As others do, I am aware that understanding "why?" has many purposes. I do not want someone to invalidate my experience, so I look for ways to validate it. To say, "it is real because..." Believing something outside of social norms is often uncomfortable. Being able to say an "authority" validated my idea helps my confidence, maybe.
Sometimes I feel adrift not staying in my assigned gender box. Understanding why would help me feel more grounded.
I also wish we could just explore our potentials without feeling scared of social censure or worse.
I think I am rambling.
I think androgyny is a normal human variation that would need no more explanation than being cis-gendered if society were not so committed to its boxes.
And, frankly, the boxes are what need explaining.
Kendall
(ps please let us be gentle with each other - we get enough criticism and harshness from the box people.
pps if you feel committed to one gender or the other, I do not mean to imply you are a box person. Be yourself with my support and appreciation! Box people want ME in THEIR boxes. I want out of the box.)
