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getting misgendered burns like hell

Started by xxUltraModLadyxx, February 14, 2011, 06:57:06 PM

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xxUltraModLadyxx

it really does. especially now that i'm transitioning and there's quite a bit of people who understand where i'm going now. now that i'm trying to live full time, getting called the boy name or my mom's "son" and all this i've been hearing for the past 17 years is now killing me. i was at a wal mart with my mom today, and these people related to my grandma go there. they know me even though i almost never see them. they're very old, so when the old lady asks "is this your son?" my mom says yes. probably because they're really old and if she told them i'm a transsexual, they would probably think i was an abomination. they probably do go to church, and they're about 80 or 90. so then this old lady related to my grandma who i hardly even know just hugs me, and it makes me uncomfortable especially if i don't know the person. i've also got aspergers, so i've got enough trouble around people as it is. i feel like i'm failing my transition in times like these, and it just makes me want to stick my head in the stove so i don't have to deal with this crap that no one understands.


by the way i'm wearing a bob with bangs, and then some mascara. i also had on this shiny bluish coat. i guess it still doesn't matter to some people. what's more, i've got little breasts, and some hips. it's just like hell trying to find out the one essential sign of what will make me female to everyone, but i guess i can't do it.
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Janet_Girl

When our support system does not use proper terms or names it does hurt.  I really think they do it so we will"drop all this silliness".

Hang in the girl.  It does get better.
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Pinkfluff

Quote from: SpaceyGirl on February 14, 2011, 06:57:06 PM
probably because they're really old and if she told them i'm a transsexual, they would probably think i was an abomination. they probably do go to church, and they're about 80 or 90.

My mother used this same argument against telling my grandmother for a long time, but in the end it was quite unfounded. I visited my grandma with my brother last Yule and she had nothing bad to say at all. I think she even called me my real name at one point. True, I don't know what she thinks about me behind my back, but even if she doesn't like it at least she was nice in front of me.

When all else fails, sometimes you just have to correct people. Fight for your dignity and never surrender.
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xxUltraModLadyxx

Quote from: Pinkfluff on February 16, 2011, 01:08:59 PM
My mother used this same argument against telling my grandmother for a long time, but in the end it was quite unfounded. I visited my grandma with my brother last Yule and she had nothing bad to say at all. I think she even called me my real name at one point. True, I don't know what she thinks about me behind my back, but even if she doesn't like it at least she was nice in front of me.

When all else fails, sometimes you just have to correct people. Fight for your dignity and never surrender.

maybe the more i go out as myself, the more comfortable i'll get and be able to just tell it like it is. i mean, it's not like people are naturally ingrained with the instinct that a male to female transsexual is into prostitution and gang rape for a living. they have to learn this from somewhere.
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