Bad Jokes

[Kevin Peña]

I've parented two children, and I can assure you that's true -- not a joke.

That's why I called it a witty observation. 

[Constance]

That's why I called it a witty observation. 

Witty, sh_tty, whatever.

[Ms. OBrien CVT]

How are a texas tornado and a tennessee divorce the same?
   Somebody's gonna lose a trailer.

[dalebert]

[Beth Andrea]

To the accusation of being an 'Murican, I plead guilty as heck...now gimme one o'them thar bacon burger donuts!

:-)

You Uropeans can have yer tofu and vino...;-)

[dalebert]

[dalebert]

[dalebert]

[dalebert]

[Ms. OBrien CVT]

[Ms. OBrien CVT]

[Ms. OBrien CVT]

[V M]

Oh nooooos, I LOLed so hard it kinda hurt    Butt who could pass up such a deal?

[Kevin Peña]

Okay, you may need to understand Czarist Russian policy to get this joke.

A Jew was drowning in the river. Two Czarist officers were just standing there. The Jew asked why they weren't doing anything. The officers explained that they didn't save Jews. So, in all of his cleverness, the Jew said with his last breath, "Down with the Czar!" The two officers jumped in the river, pulled him out, and arrested him for trouble-making. 

[Ms. OBrien CVT]

To err is human,
To foul things up takes a computer,
But to really FUBAR takes Corporate Headquarters.

[Anna++]

True story!  Many months ago I was walking around downtown with 2 of my guy friends.  A homeless guy turns from the couple he's bothering and says to us "Here we have 3 fine gentlemen walking down the street with no women.  Do you mind if I ask you something?"  I immediately replied with "The answer is yes!  We are all engineers!".

That got a laugh from everybody within earshot.

[dalebert]

I immediately replied with "The answer is yes!  We are all engineers!".

LOL! That reminds me of a joke.

Three engineers were arguing over the evolved purpose of the glans of a man's penis.

The electrical engineer pointed out that there are a lot of nerve endings in the glans which enhance the man's pleasure during sex.

The mechanical engineer disagreed and pointed out that the glans is flared out in order to provide additional stimulation, thereby enhancing the woman's pleasure during sex.

The software engineer said "You're both wrong", to which the others looked at him oddly and asked, "Then do tell. What is its purpose?"

"It's for efficiency. The reason it's flared out is to keep your hand from slipping off the end during a reciprocating motion!"

[Kevin Peña]

What kind of ears does an architect have? Enginears! 

[Anna++]

This one popped up on my google reader a few months ago:  A person using Apple Maps walks into a bar... or maybe a hospital ... or possibly a church...

[Kevin Peña]

An actual newspaper headline: "Pro-lifer shoots and kills a man."