I was reading a study saying that inconsistent, unpredictable finances were harder to deal with than being poor. I know we've found that true, and I suspect that is what you are going through, too. I have found it helps to buy lasting things when I have money, and live frugally when I don't. That way, I feel less deprived, because I really enjoy what I purchased when I could. Hang in there; I know you will make it. I'd offer you the spare room ( well it's not really spare, but the occupant is away at college), but your school is one wicked commute from here.
I used to fret about sleepless nights, but I learned if I stayed in bed with my eyes closed, I would feel sufficiently rested in the morning. Something like that happened last night. I was working on a T shirt design for my wife, and couldn't get it right, so I lay in bed with my eyes closed, going over the details. I'd doze off, wake up, and chew on it some more. All of a sudden, I had the answer and slept soundly til morn. I arose, saddled my trusty computer, and soon she had the T shirt for her Purim costume: she was Superrabbi, fighting for peace, justice and a Jewish way of life. Congregants love it and requested photos. And I am rested.
Usually, it works better if I tell myself a story while in bed with eyes closed. I'm not much for sexual phantasies, though I admit to a repeated phantasy in which someone turns me into a woman, but I fall asleep before anything sexual happens. Other times, I kayak across the ocean or hike amid the Western mountains, and never finish the journey.
I rely on naps, too, when I can get them; otherwise, sleep deprived, I slow down until I come to a grinding halt, capable of doing nothing worthwhile.
We had homemade chili for lunch that I liked better than she did, so I hope she like tonight better. It's our 23rd anniversary, and I am making filet mignon, roasted asparagus, and baked potatoes. I'm saving the Henry Bain sauce you turned us onto for the Derby. No dessert. For every hamantaschen we baked and gave away, someone gave us theirs. We've too many sweets in house for a couple enrolled in Weight Watchers. Then, once more to bed until 2:30 am.
Schlaf Wohl, Du Susser Engel Du,
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