Last weekend I took a trip down to visit one of my best friends and his wife in beautiful San Diego. I've known this guy since we were freshmen in high school, and his wife I also met during high school (though they didn't start dating until college.) We were roomates in college, and have been best friends since we met.
This was a big deal for me. He (and she) are the first people in my peer group of life long friends I have come out to, and I really was hoping that it would go well because their friendship is really important to me. I'm so glad I had the opportunity to do it in person.
I stayed a long weekend, and about half way through my trip, on a Saturday night we were sitting in their living room and I told them I had a serious topic to discuss with them. Then of course I came out.
I talked for I guess 20 or 30 minutes or so explaining what this meant for me, my trans history, and briefly what I expect going forward. They each looked directly at me (not speaking for each other), and said basically, "I love you, and I support you. This doesn't change the way I see our friendship. Please tell me how I can be supportive to you." Then we talked informally about the topic for another half hour or so.
On one hand I was blown away. I have experienced such compassion, and I have so much gratitude for people in my life who have given me so much, and who have accepted me. On the other hand I wasn't surprised either because I know both of these people are good people, with good hearts, and genuine compassion for others.
Tonight, I see my friend on Facebook has added his local LGBT support center to his "liked" pages, as well as NTCE (National Center for Transgender Equality). It means so much to me that he has the courage to publicly post his support for these things on his profile.
I know there are some people in my life who will really struggle with this, and I am sure I have things to work out in the months ahead. But tonight I am grateful for this friend (and his wife).
If you are thinking of coming out, even if you have people in your life that you know might have a hard time with it, I hope you have friends or family who you know will love you for who you are. Chances are you do - don't just focus on the ones who might have a hard time, because when you find people who accept you for who you are it's a beautiful thing.
