Hello everyone!

[Blythe_Fate]

I've been lurking around as a guest for a little while and figured it's about time to introduce myself.
My name's Blythe (Bly for short) Which means: free spirit. The name chosen for me suits me perfectly.
Ever since I was little I haven't felt like myself. I am technically female but identify myself as male.
I'm 32, love to draw, paint, I play lots of nerdy games and I love anime. I have a great group of friends and a loving boyfriend.
But.. none of them know how I've been feeling about my gender identity. There have been days and nights where I feel, idk.. stuck. I thought that I may be depressed, though I have nothing to be depressed about. I really am an optimistic person and the one that my friends tend to go to for advice. So realizing for myself how I feel has been tugging at me for many years now. I'm at the point where only one other person knows and I'm not sure how to come out with it to everyone else I care about.
I know my friends are very supportive/accepting people.. otherwise, they would not be my friends. My boyfriend, however, I'm not sure how he will react. He is a wonderful man and I do love him dearly. We have been together for about 4 years now and live together. I do cosplay and 99% of the time I crossplay. This he is plenty ok with and does, in fact, suggest other crossplays for me.
I don't think it would be a huge shock for him (or my friends) it's just that step of actually saying it out loud.
I've always been a tomboy, never wearing skirts/dresses (not to say some guys don't but, it's not for me). I just feel "right" when I am dressed this way. As far as sexual orientation goes, I am bi for sure. I have had both boyfriends and girlfriends and am attracted to both. Personally, I do not see a gender.. I see personality and physical/mental attraction.
I'm hoping that after posting here for a while I can work up the courage (and the right words) to come out to my loved ones.

Thank you all for reading!

[Janet_Girl]

Hi Blythe,

Welcome to our little family. Over 6300 strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion.

Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams.  Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.

But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another brother.

And be sure to check out these links ( MUST READS )

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Hugs and Love,
Janet

[Maegan]

Hi Blythe
Welcome here. Its about time you joined! No need to lurk anymore. You will find lots of useful info here. Feel free to ask.

Looking forward to reading more of your posts.

Huggs

Maegan

[FinnBear]

Hi Blythe! I saw you came to say hi on my thread so I wanted to return the favor. I lurked around for awhile as well but it was a particularly rough night I decided to post my intro thread. Even being around here only a few days has made me feel so much better! I hope it will help you figure out everything.

[Blythe_Fate]

Thank you all very much for the warm welcome! 

@Finn Yeah, same here. It's a wonderful feeling knowing you're not alone.

[Devlyn]

Hi Bly, ooh, that rhymes, you need to be careful about that, last time I replied with a poem, well, it wasn't pretty! Welcome and hugs, Tracey

[Blythe_Fate]

lol!
That's ok I'm a fan of silly little things. Thank you for the welcome! 

[Barbara]

Hi bly,give this a try.now that is a rhyme.Wecome

[xAndrewx]

Welcome to the site Blythe 

[soulfairer]

Hi, Blythe!

I am technically male also, but would like also to present myself as a woman. I also play nerdy games and work with programming, but also buy women's magazines and even talk about girlish stuff with some coworkers. What they don't know are... my other traits.

I also don't know how would they react if I told them about wishing to dress as a woman (I don't even think about skirts and stuff, just woman jeans & t-shirts). Thinking a lot about it!

Welcome and hope you'll find shelter here

[Blythe_Fate]

@Barbara: lol that was cute! thanks ! 

Soul: Nerdy games are great!  I play Pathfinder rpg, Munchkin, Zombies.. board games like that. What ones do you play?
Just one more of my 'one of the guys' traits I've grown up with. The other girls were playing with Barbie.. and I was playing with G.I Joes. XD

Yeah, I hear you. I feel most comfortable in guys clothing.. always have. Feeling more like myself now that I'm slowly coming out to my friends with it. ^_^
I say go with what makes you happy!

[justmeinoz]

Hi Bly!
Maybe crossplay would give you an opening to come out to your boyfriend? 

Karen.

[Blythe_Fate]

Well, he's seen me crossplay.. and has suggested male characters for me to pair with him.
I think it will be strange for him, but will probably not change much, we were friends first. He knows me really well and I doubt it would be a big surprise.

I'm just so nervous. >.<!  .. and I'm not a nervous type of person. I'm the one to say what's on my mind, not hold back.. just this is.. a big thing. 


>.> giggity..

[annette]

Hi Blythe

First of all welcome.
you wrote: But.. none of them know how I've been feeling about my gender identity. There have been days and nights where I feel, idk.. stuck. I thought that I may be depressed, though I have nothing to be depressed about.

Well, I know when I was in that stage I was a little depressed too because I had no identity.
I didn't belong to the boys or the girls, I think that's quite depressing tough I had everything what I could wish except an identity.

I'll hope your bf takes it the good way when you come out to him.

hugs and strenght

Annette

[soulfairer]

@Barbara: lol that was cute! thanks ! 

Soul: Nerdy games are great!  I play Pathfinder rpg, Munchkin, Zombies.. board games like that. What ones do you play?
Just one more of my 'one of the guys' traits I've grown up with. The other girls were playing with Barbie.. and I was playing with G.I Joes. XD

Yeah, I hear you. I feel most comfortable in guys clothing.. always have. Feeling more like myself now that I'm slowly coming out to my friends with it. ^_^
I say go with what makes you happy!

I've played Final Fantasy I to VII. Chrono Trigger a little. But no board games... But, as a programmer, there's a significant nerdy payload included

There's a significant acceptance of women wearing men's clothes. Can't say the same otherwise If I buy even a female t-shirt, people would notice...

[Blythe_Fate]

Hi Blythe

First of all welcome.
you wrote: But.. none of them know how I've been feeling about my gender identity. There have been days and nights where I feel, idk.. stuck. I thought that I may be depressed, though I have nothing to be depressed about.

Well, I know when I was in that stage I was a little depressed too because I had no identity.
I didn't belong to the boys or the girls, I think that's quite depressing tough I had everything what I could wish except an identity.

I'll hope your bf takes it the good way when you come out to him.

hugs and strenght

Annette

Thank you for the great encouragement. I really hope so too. He is a very accepting/open-minded person.. so it may be like "uh what?" at first.. I truly believe he will understand and adjust well.

I've played Final Fantasy I to VII. Chrono Trigger a little. But no board games... But, as a programmer, there's a significant nerdy payload included

There's a significant acceptance of women wearing men's clothes. Can't say the same otherwise If I buy even a female t-shirt, people would notice...

Yes, that is true, sadly.
But.. on that note, I really don't care what others (and I mean strangers) think. Especially about how I dress. I tend to wear more dark & spooky things.. lol turns heads, but after a few years I had learned to ignore the stupid comments.

I hope you gain the acceptance you desire and look smashing while dressing as you feel you should. ^__^

[soulfairer]

Thank you for the great encouragement. I really hope so too. He is a very accepting/open-minded person.. so it may be like "uh what?" at first.. I truly believe he will understand and adjust well.

Yes, that is true, sadly.
But.. on that note, I really don't care what others (and I mean strangers) think. Especially about how I dress. I tend to wear more dark & spooky things.. lol turns heads, but after a few years I had learned to ignore the stupid comments.

I hope you gain the acceptance you desire and look smashing while dressing as you feel you should. ^__^

hope I can. But still, for now I know many, many straight people around AND some of them don't even imagine that I know the, er, non-straight world. And congratulations for having a supportive bf. Can't wait to find a supportive person too! My last gf, as I know, would not understand it.

One day I'll try at least crossdressing in public. Still, I'm in a low-dose HRT. Someday that'll naturally happen...