Pulling up a chair

[Kristin]

Hi, everybody. I'd say "My name is..." but I don't know what name to use yet. Of late, I've been using Kristin, but I don't think it will end up "fitting." But it will do for now.

I've been crossdressing since about puberty, though only in the privacy of my own home (or "underdressing" in public). Right now, I'm exploring whether I'm actually trans, and how I should respond to that.

I'm married. My wife has fortunately been supportive. She has teenaged children from a previous marriage.

Right now, I'm trying to stay in the closet, worried about my immigration status. (I have a marriage-based green card and immigration needs to confirm the marriage is legit before my green card will be permanent. I understand that's largely a rubber-stamp process in most cases, but the thought of being forced to leave my wife and the life I've built since moving here is a big fear.)

I tend to use my ears more than my typing fingers, so pulling up my chair and smoothing my skirt, and waving shyly.

[Janet_Girl]

Hi OpenHeart,

Welcome to our little family. Over 7000 strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion.

Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams.  Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.

But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another member.

And be sure to check out these links ( MUST READS )

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Hugs and Love,
Janet

[Devlyn]

Hi Kristin, welcome to Susans! Don't be shy, jump right in and start posting. See you around, hugs, Tracey

[Randi]

Hello Openheart and welcome to Susans. If you aren't sure where you fit into the TG spectrum a therapist would be a good place to start looking for answers.

Randi

[Kristin]

Thanks for the welcomes, everybody!

If you aren't sure where you fit into the TG spectrum a therapist would be a good place to start looking for answers.

It's funny. I sort of feel anxious about doing that, as if I should know the answers before I walk in. It's completely backwards, I realize.

Of course, the other complication is that my wife got cut back to part time, so we lost our health insurance...so there's an additional level of stress over seeing a therapist. And I'm still trying to do a bit of dabbling, trying labels on, seeing what resonates with me and what feels wrong.

I know there's also fear, because if I'm right in my suspicions, I'll need a thicker skin than I've developed so far in life, in order to survive.

Thanks again, all for the welcome! :-)

[Randi]

For me going to the therapist was the release I needed. There I found where I was then and where to go next which was a huge relief. I still struggle but not to the degree that I did previously. If you dont have insurance, most will work on a sliding scale with you. This means you will get somewhat of a discounted rate. Take your time and make sure of what you want before doing anything that will cost you alot of money. Also bear in mind that all therapists are not the same & they are supposed to help you find your way thru the maze. 

Randi

[Kristin]

For me going to the therapist was the release I needed. There I found where I was then and where to go next which was a huge relief. I still struggle but not to the degree that I did previously. If you dont have insurance, most will work on a sliding scale with you. This means you will get somewhat of a discounted rate. Take your time and make sure of what you want before doing anything that will cost you alot of money. Also bear in mind that all therapists are not the same & they are supposed to help you find your way thru the maze.

Thanks, Randi,

Believe me, I'm in the shallow end here. I know I enjoy dressing as a woman, so we're building up my collection of appropriate clothes again. (Mine got purged when I started with my girlfriend a few years ago.) As usual, I may be mentally jumping too many steps ahead here, but I know that I'll be very cautious when it comes to major changes. But it's obvious that I'm not happy at the moment, so I expect that change of some sort will be required.

Kristin

[Randi]

It sounds to me that you are doing pretty good compared to some of the rest of us-myself included. We all have times when we struggle but we move forward the best way we can. I too would like to jump ahead but it just doesn't work that way.
Randi