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Title: Hi and thanks
Post by: soon2b on January 25, 2016, 09:25:04 PM
Post by: soon2b on January 25, 2016, 09:25:04 PM
I have been browsing, reading and learning a lot from all of the great people here. I absolutely have to start out with a very loud....thank you so much!
I am 47, married (I have not told her yet but she suspects, I have a feeling we were both in denial) live in Colorado and finally understand or think lol I understand myself a lot more. Boy, are people going to be in for a shock. I mean holy cow I am kind of the man's man. Hunt,fish,shoot, combat veteran,security consulting and am currently in law enforcement. Reckon I will be one tough chic :)
I had a huge epiphany while thinking (dangerous habit) and instant peace and happiness set in. I am mtf transgender. Of course it did not take very long for a boat load of anxiety,nervousness and whatever the heck else to set in.
I called my EAP and asked for a referral to a therapist and had to say out loud "I need help with gender identity/dysphoria" The really nice girl on the line immediately searched for a therapist with experience in this area. Of course not easy, I could not get an appointment. I called back today went through the process again. I have an appointment on wednesday, now I am just crazy, spinning brain cluttered,heart pounding, hoping i dont have a frigging heart attack before I can summit the peak ..well I am sure you know.
I will spare the life story for now but suffice it to say things are going to get rough. Climbing a mountain is rough also, but the view once you get there makes the journey worth every inch of ground covered,even if it all uphill.
So hi and thank you
Jeff soon2 be Beth
I am 47, married (I have not told her yet but she suspects, I have a feeling we were both in denial) live in Colorado and finally understand or think lol I understand myself a lot more. Boy, are people going to be in for a shock. I mean holy cow I am kind of the man's man. Hunt,fish,shoot, combat veteran,security consulting and am currently in law enforcement. Reckon I will be one tough chic :)
I had a huge epiphany while thinking (dangerous habit) and instant peace and happiness set in. I am mtf transgender. Of course it did not take very long for a boat load of anxiety,nervousness and whatever the heck else to set in.
I called my EAP and asked for a referral to a therapist and had to say out loud "I need help with gender identity/dysphoria" The really nice girl on the line immediately searched for a therapist with experience in this area. Of course not easy, I could not get an appointment. I called back today went through the process again. I have an appointment on wednesday, now I am just crazy, spinning brain cluttered,heart pounding, hoping i dont have a frigging heart attack before I can summit the peak ..well I am sure you know.
I will spare the life story for now but suffice it to say things are going to get rough. Climbing a mountain is rough also, but the view once you get there makes the journey worth every inch of ground covered,even if it all uphill.
So hi and thank you
Jeff soon2 be Beth
Title: Re: Hi and thanks
Post by: Dena on January 25, 2016, 09:38:25 PM
Post by: Dena on January 25, 2016, 09:38:25 PM
Welcome to Susan's Place. I always thought the hardest part was deciding to come out and then bring the first person into the fold. That tied my stomach in a knot for 3 days after that. I think you will find the therapist a great experience and it will be the first step on your journey. I had my surgery 33 years ago so that would make you 14 years old when I completed my journey. Feel free to ask me any question and enjoy your visit.
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Title: Re: Hi and thanks
Post by: Ms Grace on January 25, 2016, 09:58:59 PM
Post by: Ms Grace on January 25, 2016, 09:58:59 PM
Welcome to Susan's, Beth! Thanks for sharing a bit about yourself.
It is common for people to think their spouse has an idea of what is going on, but that's not always the case even when you think it couldn't be more obvious. It's good your having a chat with a therapist though, they should hopefully give you some ideas about how to proceed.
Quote from: soon2b on January 25, 2016, 09:25:04 PM
...I have not told her yet but she suspects...
It is common for people to think their spouse has an idea of what is going on, but that's not always the case even when you think it couldn't be more obvious. It's good your having a chat with a therapist though, they should hopefully give you some ideas about how to proceed.
Title: Re: Hi and thanks
Post by: V M on January 25, 2016, 10:24:11 PM
Post by: V M on January 25, 2016, 10:24:11 PM
Hi Beth :icon_wave:
Welcome to Susan's :) Glad to have you here, join on in the fun
Hugs
V M
Welcome to Susan's :) Glad to have you here, join on in the fun
Hugs
V M
Title: Re: Hi and thanks
Post by: AmandaDanielle on January 25, 2016, 10:38:44 PM
Post by: AmandaDanielle on January 25, 2016, 10:38:44 PM
Beth, you and I have so much in common. I work in an uber masculine workplace and have always been very manly in order to over compensate. I can totally identify with what you are saying. Everyone will be shocked when i come out socially. Welcome to the forum it's been super helpful to me as I'm sure it will be for you!! If you ever need to talk, send me a message I'd love to chat!!
Sent from my SM-N910V using Tapatalk
Sent from my SM-N910V using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Hi and thanks
Post by: soon2b on January 26, 2016, 07:50:58 AM
Post by: soon2b on January 26, 2016, 07:50:58 AM
Thank you for the warm welcome and kind words. I just realized something , I really like my name.
Beth
Beth
Title: Re: Hi and thanks
Post by: Devlyn on January 26, 2016, 09:29:15 AM
Post by: Devlyn on January 26, 2016, 09:29:15 AM
Hi Beth, welcome to Susan's Place! I'm a Bostonian. It's a nice feeling hearing our chosen name used, isn't it? :)
Why don't you stop by our veterans thread here: Roll Call! (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,96755.0.html) and muster in. I'll be seeing you around the site!
Hugs, Devlyn
Why don't you stop by our veterans thread here: Roll Call! (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,96755.0.html) and muster in. I'll be seeing you around the site!
Hugs, Devlyn
Title: Re: Hi and thanks
Post by: soon2b on January 27, 2016, 03:21:09 PM
Post by: soon2b on January 27, 2016, 03:21:09 PM
Hi Devlyn,
Ist time and yes it is wonderful, more so than I expected. Thanks for the link. Can't miss roll call, already late lol
Beth
Ist time and yes it is wonderful, more so than I expected. Thanks for the link. Can't miss roll call, already late lol
Beth