I have been browsing, reading and learning a lot from all of the great people here. I absolutely have to start out with a very loud....thank you so much!
I am 47, married (I have not told her yet but she suspects, I have a feeling we were both in denial) live in Colorado and finally understand or think lol I understand myself a lot more. Boy, are people going to be in for a shock. I mean holy cow I am kind of the man's man. Hunt,fish,shoot, combat veteran,security consulting and am currently in law enforcement. Reckon I will be one tough chic

I had a huge epiphany while thinking (dangerous habit) and instant peace and happiness set in. I am mtf transgender. Of course it did not take very long for a boat load of anxiety,nervousness and whatever the heck else to set in.
I called my EAP and asked for a referral to a therapist and had to say out loud "I need help with gender identity/dysphoria" The really nice girl on the line immediately searched for a therapist with experience in this area. Of course not easy, I could not get an appointment. I called back today went through the process again. I have an appointment on wednesday, now I am just crazy, spinning brain cluttered,heart pounding, hoping i dont have a frigging heart attack before I can summit the peak ..well I am sure you know.
I will spare the life story for now but suffice it to say things are going to get rough. Climbing a mountain is rough also, but the view once you get there makes the journey worth every inch of ground covered,even if it all uphill.
So hi and thank you
Jeff soon2 be Beth