Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I've been on a road trip since Saturday, have been wearing a hat the entire time. I just got to my hotel, and took my hat off and saw how long my hair is getting. It feels so affirming to see my hair getting longer since I started growing it out.  :D

Quote from: Alana1990 on April 28, 2025, 06:11:38 PMI've been on a road trip since Saturday, have been wearing a hat the entire time. I just got to my hotel, and took my hat off and saw how long my hair is getting. It feels so affirming to see my hair getting longer since I started growing it out.  :D

That sounds nice.

Chrissy

Congratulations!  I transitioned too late in life.  I have a "skin head" so the wig fits better.

Agreed!  Euphoria, my hair is down to my shoulder blades.  I love it.  Certainly a pain to curl since it is very straight, but I can't do without it.

Euphoria beats dysphoria!

Chrissy

Quote from: Alana1990 on April 28, 2025, 06:11:38 PMIt feels so affirming to see my hair getting longer since I started growing it out.

Hey Alana,

I love this. There seems to be something affirming about watching our hair grow out, isn't there? For me, it's not just about the length, it's also the identity that length represents.

My longer hair has become part of how I stay centered. I've noticed that by the time I leave my apartment and glance down to insert my key, my posture has already shifted, shoulders back, head lifted.

It's as if my hair itself has taught me to carry myself differently.

It reminds me to walk in balance, not to shrink, not to stare at the ground, but to move through the world upright. Even in public now, I catch myself smiling at strangers, greeting them with my chin held high, instead of the downward nod I used to give.

The way my hair brushes against my shoulders keeps me aware of how I'm holding myself.

I don't know if there's a correlation between longer hair and posture, but I love how it keeps me in tune with myself when I'm out and about.


~ Lilis 💗

Yeah you won't be saying that when your hair is down to your butt and it takes up an inordinate amount of time to keep it looking presentable, lol. ;)

I mean... you probably will haha. Enjoy it, sweetie. <3

I just need it long enough to plait  >:-)

Quote from: D'Amalie on May 01, 2025, 03:41:37 PMI just need it long enough to plait  >:-)

Mostly just to do it up at night, so to acheive soft curls the next day :)

Quote from: Lilis on April 29, 2025, 09:16:25 PMHey Alana,

I love this. There seems to be something affirming about watching our hair grow out, isn't there? For me, it's not just about the length, it's also the identity that length represents.

My longer hair has become part of how I stay centered. I've noticed that by the time I leave my apartment and glance down to insert my key, my posture has already shifted, shoulders back, head lifted.

It's as if my hair itself has taught me to carry myself differently.

It reminds me to walk in balance, not to shrink, not to stare at the ground, but to move through the world upright. Even in public now, I catch myself smiling at strangers, greeting them with my chin held high, instead of the downward nod I used to give.

The way my hair brushes against my shoulders keeps me aware of how I'm holding myself.

I don't know if there's a correlation between longer hair and posture, but I love how it keeps me in tune with myself when I'm out and about.


~ Lilis 💗

Yeah one day we need to see the mighty Lilis. <3

I mean there probably is a thing. Long hair is like... a massive pain. It weighs more than you think. My hair was like this colour, lol...
(https://i.pinimg.com/originals/a5/4d/15/a54d159288c9f7c16c732bcd3cdecfc6.jpg)

Quote from: Sephirah on May 01, 2025, 10:02:43 PMI mean there probably is a thing. Long hair is like... a massive pain. It weighs more than you think. My hair was like this colour, lol...
(https://i.pinimg.com/originals/a5/4d/15/a54d159288c9f7c16c732bcd3cdecfc6.jpg)

Hot Pink, Lauren! (https://www.bing.com/images/search?q=hot%20pink%20hair&form=IQFRML&first=1)...  👀

I love it! 😍


~ Lilis 🩵💗🤍

Quote from: Lilis on May 02, 2025, 02:31:11 AMHot Pink, Lauren! (https://www.bing.com/images/search?q=hot%20pink%20hair&form=IQFRML&first=1)...  👀

I love it! 😍


~ Lilis 🩵💗🤍

Hah, kind of. I never dared go the whole way. More black with pink highlights, hahaha.

Thank you. <3

Quote from: Sephirah on May 01, 2025, 10:02:43 PMYeah one day we need to see the mighty Lilis. <3

I edited your quote, those big words make me feel like I'm taking something from the divine when they're used to describe me.

But I've been thinking about it this quote, and I might post something tomorrow after my second laser session... if I can manage to catch a good shot with the right angles and lighting.

I'm really nervous about this, so no promises... we'll see! 😰😰

~ Lilis 💗

Quote from: Lilis on May 02, 2025, 08:34:48 PMI edited your quote, those big words make me feel like I'm taking something from the divine when they're used to describe me.

But I've been thinking about it this quote, and I might post something tomorrow after my second laser session... if I can manage to catch a good shot with the right angles and lighting.

I'm really nervous about this, so no promises... we'll see! 😰😰

~ Lilis 💗

Girl, it's okay. I only ever posted one picture of me. Like 15 years ago. Back when I used to have a blog... and dinosaurs ruled the earth. I deleted it within a day, lol. Please don't do anything you aren't comfortable with okay? I don't need to see you to see you. <3

And no, Lilis, you have a huge spark of divinity about you girl. You go out of your way to be a force for good for people. You comfort everyone, ask for nothing. You are kind and gentle. Understanding and empathic. You are everything good in this world. Like so many other people here, honestly. I think having to go through adversity makes you appreciate how that affects people.

So no, girl. I have reverential respect for you, okay?

Quote from: Sephirah on May 02, 2025, 08:41:28 PMSo no, girl. I have reverential respect for you, okay?

Thank You, Lauren. 💗

You all are amazing. Thank you for sharing yourselves here. Know that it makes a huge difference for others.

Quote from: flowers_and_trees on May 02, 2025, 09:00:15 PMYou all are amazing. Thank you for sharing yourselves here. Know that it makes a huge difference for others.

You are, too, Pema. Even being here and being brave enough to share your story with other people is a big thing. And it helps others. Is why this place has been so important for so long. It takes a lot of guts to put yourself out there. To come out of your shell. To even admit to others what you have known yourself. That is no small leap of faith. And not something everyone can do. Especially these days.

Anyone who puts themselves out there, who is scared of being vulnerable but does it anyway... that's courage. That's Susan's Place. Full of incredible individuals. <3

Quote from: Sephirah on May 01, 2025, 03:30:11 PMYeah you won't be saying that when your hair is down to your butt and it takes up an inordinate amount of time to keep it looking presentable, lol. ;)

I mean... you probably will haha. Enjoy it, sweetie. <3

Long hair is a two way street, it looks fab but a total pain in the arse to maintain. I have had my hair very long and showering was such a production. It takes forever to dry, even with a blower, and when I had shorter hair the shower was just take a towel and rub your hair a few times and done.The long, long hair was always a tangle nightmare and I had to buy the detangle spray from the store. But, I loved how the long hair looked. So, still moving back and forth on haircut decisions. Right now, it's growing long agin. It makes me smile but also pisses me off ...  :)

Quote from: Sinclair on May 02, 2025, 09:24:03 PMLong hair is a two way street, it looks fab but a total pain in the arse to maintain. I have had my hair very long and showering was such a production. It takes forever to dry, even with a blower, and when I had shorter hair the shower was just take a towel and rub your hair a few times and done.The long, long hair was always a tangle nightmare and I had to buy the detangle spray from the store. But, I loved how the long hair looked. So, still moving back and forth on haircut decisions. Right now, it's growing long agin. It makes me smile but also pisses me off ...  :)

Haha preach it, sistah. It is good in theory, but in practice it's like... where are the hedge trimmers? Why am I taking 2 hours to get it manageable and looking nice? If you're okay with that then go with it. I think probably mid back is a good compromise. Super long is just... it makes you feel good, until you have to wash it and dry it and condition it and de-tangle it and omg... my hair is naturally curly so there's the whole hair straightener nightmare to think about. I burned myself and probably swore more than a Navvie just to look good. And... I mean it does. But keeping that is a fulltime job. :P

Quote from: Sinclair on May 02, 2025, 09:24:03 PMLong hair is a two way street, it looks fab but a total pain in the arse to maintain. I have had my hair very long and showering was such a production. It takes forever to dry, even with a blower, and when I had shorter hair the shower was just take a towel and rub your hair a few times and done.The long, long hair was always a tangle nightmare and I had to buy the detangle spray from the store. But, I loved how the long hair looked. So, still moving back and forth on haircut decisions. Right now, it's growing long agin. It makes me smile but also pisses me off ...  :)

My hair is about 5 inches long. I'm slowly discovering how much work it is. I've recently discovered headbands like the ones baseball players wear. They've become quite the godsend for me.

My hair is just about to my armpits. I would like it a bit longer, but as a sister curlytop it does get annoying. My hair is dry and curly, so it tangles easily if I don't straighten it.

Drying is a snap. I was in Walmart a while back, and they had an aisle full of the "As Seen On TV" items. What jumped out at me was the old Turbie Twist hair towel. (https://www.turbietwist.com/)
I grabbed it up and have been so happy with it. My Bestie has hair almost to her waist, so I got her one, and she raves about it. Highly recommended for long hair care.

Quote from: Alana1990 on May 02, 2025, 09:35:03 PMMy hair is about 5 inches long. I'm slowly discovering how much work it is. I've recently discovered headbands like the ones baseball players wear. They've become quite the godsend for me.

Don't let me put you off, sweetie. Long hair can make you feel awesome. And the work in keeping it looking good can be a part of you. Gives you a big smile sometimes. I think I let mine grow too long. Recently had to make changes to that but putting work into how we look is something trans girls only really discover when we accept who we are. Because we have a newfound thirst for life. Before that it's kind of "Meh, whatever, that isn't me. It doesn't matter."

Quote from: Alana1990 on May 02, 2025, 09:35:03 PMMy hair is about 5 inches long. I'm slowly discovering how much work it is. I've recently discovered headbands like the ones baseball players wear. They've become quite the godsend for me.

Well, keep it going. Like I said long hair IMO looks so fab! Just be advised detangle spray will be in your future! Best wishes sweetie! :)

Quote from: Lori Dee on May 02, 2025, 09:38:16 PMMy hair is just about to my armpits. I would like it a bit longer, but as a sister curlytop it does get annoying. My hair is dry and curly, so it tangles easily if I don't straighten it.

Drying is a snap. I was in Walmart a while back, and they had an aisle full of the "As Seen On TV" items. What jumped out at me was the old Turbie Twist hair towel. (https://www.turbietwist.com/)
I grabbed it up and have been so happy with it. My Bestie has hair almost to her waist, so I got her one, and she raves about it. Highly recommended for long hair care.

How have I never seen this? I think we probably can't get that in the UK. Thanks for the tip, Lori. Once I grow my hair out again, that's top of my list!

Quote from: Sinclair on May 02, 2025, 09:47:09 PMWell, keep it going. Like I said long hair IMO looks so fab! Just be advised detangle spray will be in your future! Best wishes sweetie! :)

And probably more hair products than you ever knew existed. But for that one moment where you feel amazing... it's worth it.

Quote from: Sephirah on May 02, 2025, 09:51:21 PMAnd probably more hair products than you ever knew existed. But for that one moment where you feel amazing... it's worth it.

Absolutely agree. This is a journey and the steps you take that make you smile are the reward.

Even joining the forum has given me euphoria. I'm aware it's abstract but just sharing thoughts has helped me so much lately. Even a sense of I'm one of the community. 🩷

Euphoria is good.

Quote from: Jessica 33 on May 04, 2025, 11:36:10 AMEven joining the forum has given me euphoria. I'm aware it's abstract but just sharing thoughts has helped me so much lately. Even a sense of I'm one of the community. 🩷

Yes, this is a community and glad you here with us! Susan's place has always been a much needed touch stone for me. A place to feel belonging, welcomed, understood, and where we can talk. :)

Hi Everyone

I provide a much longer story about my hair in Sarah B's Story.  (https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,247190.msg2302345.html#msg2302345)  However, below is a short version of the story.

"Long Hair, don't talk to me about long hair" (apologies to HHGTTG).  Fifty years of long hair and it's been as long as it is shown in my avatar.  I don't know why I love long hair so much.  I guess it's just part of who I am.

As a child I enjoyed brushing my godmother's hair.  At twelve I was talked into a short haircut. I hated it and vowed never to go to a barber again.

By eighteen I was letting my hair grow. At twenty-one it was past my shoulders. I cared for it carefully, especially while swimming. No blow drying, just natural drying and regular conditioning.

Before I changed my life I wore it with a middle part.  Later I got a fringe and styled it daily.  Simple buns, plaits and twists became part of my routine.

I feared going bald and noticed a receding hairline just before going on my first holiday as Sarah.  Starting hormones stopped that nightmare.

I've coloured it, trimmed it a few times but never cut it short.  It's usually waist length. One perm (spiral) ended in tears after swimming in the sea, because I could not comb it properly.  I never tried again.

I even cared for my mum's hair when she couldn't.

So don't talk to me about hair. I've lived it, loved it and to this day it is still my crowning glory!

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator

My Goodness!  That was very, very pink.  Hard to get a promotion with that I'd say.  Age appropriate I hope?

~ Lilis 💗

Quote from: Alana1990 on May 02, 2025, 09:35:03 PMMy hair is about 5 inches long. I'm slowly discovering how much work it is. I've recently discovered headbands like the ones baseball players wear. They've become quite the godsend for me.

Well, as long as your hair length makes you happy keep going! For most of my life my hair has always been long. Had to cut in the past for some jobs, but that's over. Now I'm in a place where I can do whatever I want. And, what I want is my long locks of hair back! Even though it's way more maintenence to care for it, I do luv long hair. :)

Quote from: D'Amalie on May 06, 2025, 07:51:09 AMMy Goodness!  That was very, very pink.  Hard to get a promotion with that I'd say.  Age appropriate I hope?

Don't have to worry about a promotion and... hahaha not even slightly age appropriate. But I'm way past the point of caring. ;D

Quote from: Lilis on May 06, 2025, 05:21:22 PM

(https://i.imgur.com/Ty7fjyN.png?1)

I've been going the DIY route with help from AI for almost a year now, no hairstylist, no cuts yet. I got a quote from a stylist the other day, but the prices were in the hundreds... so I think I'll let it grow a little longer for now.  ;D

~ Lilis 💗

(https://i.imgur.com/Ce1gW6L.jpeg)

(https://i.imgur.com/qVzCL7O.jpeg)

Hair Before GAHT:

Texture: Medium (not fine, not coarse, somewhere in the middle)

Type: Curly

Curl Pattern: 2A — soft, loose waves with a slight bend and minimal frizz

Porosity: Low — resists moisture absorption, often causing products to sit on top and build up.

I don't know what this is, but something is happening after GAHT.

Will cut a few strands so I can test this coming weekend.

~ Lilis 💗

Love going to the hairdressers. Love long hair & was lucky enough to grow up in the 60s & 70s were it wasn't so unusual even though I had to have horrid boy cuts til 13. I started going grey at 18 & coloured & bleached til 57. Now 67 & my favourite style is this French Twist that takes 10 seconds with a Ficcare Maximas medium hair clip.

https://scontent.fman2-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/499486369_2550708481946993_6866028294891784291_n.jpg?_nc_cat=108&ccb=1-7&_nc_sid=6ee11a&_nc_ohc=3rBkTN6_o8QQ7kNvwGhMC4F&_nc_oc=AdnuwheZFMicwQ1vcTHY1f36UTE5Bfr-YWHMU6QVO804GRAwnER-34RyPO3NTg0nCps&_nc_zt=23&_nc_ht=scontent.fman2-1.fna&_nc_gid=Yd3iWnSu1ls62cdS7sSwog&oh=00_AfLYtQxFI7lCiqeSy0MZ8IYTVG8u91Lxz9IuuAf_SSf2eQ&oe=683CC519

At the hairdressers after my trim wash & blow dry. Can't get it much longer without see through ends.
https://scontent.fman2-2.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/499800191_2547028085648366_7177800765245204099_n.jpg?_nc_cat=109&ccb=1-7&_nc_sid=aa7b47&_nc_ohc=gQz-7WE6zaYQ7kNvwHzfRAh&_nc_oc=Adnll6XLc8NpFGSow8qmt1WldUj5k-pYd_JmYe5ssbcZjvOOZabbUw62ly3vgqURJps&_nc_zt=23&_nc_ht=scontent.fman2-2.fna&_nc_gid=90Ojq7761KERBzWAwXSMwQ&oh=00_AfJkp7dmPbhdlqwc_NHmS8FIjo_EBlmsc8eMw6DL1w34Pw&oe=683CBE31

https://scontent.fman2-2.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/497886001_2545562282461613_5400743291353179056_n.jpg?_nc_cat=109&ccb=1-7&_nc_sid=aa7b47&_nc_ohc=6I7851m_EboQ7kNvwGBAze1&_nc_oc=AdlcM10RNJeKUoY9qBLd3iUd1bXSmS0_-XBqooYjUESbSxa6Pzan_CtTlV_Qql1aAY4&_nc_zt=23&_nc_ht=scontent.fman2-2.fna&_nc_gid=sGrjx_fUVzNAjgQfS_odSw&oh=00_AfJYcW2KUa51j5o38Boi-bq8qVLhv5qJmbpDRBPaxWRSZg&oe=683CAA50

Kim,

So very nice.


Chrissy

@Lilis  @big kim

Dear Lilis and Kim:
Thank you for sharing and posting; I really enjoyed reading your
comments and viewing your "hair" pictures...


Kim: Long beautiful hair !!!!  very nice. :)


.... Lilis Your hair is definitely getting longer!!!
            Question: Is your curly hair naturally curly?
              A straight haired girl like me is jealous !!!

HUGS, Danielle [Northern Star Girl]

Euphoria is much better than dysphoria, for sure.

Quote from: Lilis on May 06, 2025, 05:21:22 PM

(https://i.imgur.com/Ty7fjyN.png?1)

I've been going the DIY route with help from AI for almost a year now, no hairstylist, no cuts yet. I got a quote from a stylist the other day, but the prices were in the hundreds... so I think I'll let it grow a little longer for now.  ;D

~ Lilis 💗

Nice!

I've been growing mine out for just over two years starting from the old military high and tight. I can totally relate to the euphoria generated as I watch it grow and am able to do more and more with it. The other day I was working out in the yard and grabbed a ball cap I have that has an opening for a high ponytail. Oh gosh, how good it felt to slip my ponytail through that slot!

I go to the hairstylist every 6 weeks now for a trim and to add some layering. She does a wonderful job (at least I THINK she does lol) and, even with a wash, it costs about $30 plus tip.

Quote from: Northern Star Girl on May 28, 2025, 09:48:56 AM@Lilis  @big kim

Dear Lilis and Kim:
Thank you for sharing and posting; I really enjoyed reading your
comments and viewing your "hair" pictures...


Kim: Long beautiful hair !!!!  very nice. :)


.... Lilis Your hair is definitely getting longer!!!
            Question: Is your curly hair naturally curly?
              A straight haired girl like me is jealous !!!

HUGS, Danielle [Northern Star Girl]

Thank you so much, Danielle! 💗

Ahahaha, yes it's naturally curly, it's a pain. I'm jeoulous of your straight hair, lol.  ;D

~ Lilis 💗

Quote from: ChrissyRyan on May 28, 2025, 09:53:05 AMNice!

Thank you, Chrissy! 💗

Quote from: Lilis on May 28, 2025, 10:50:35 AMThank you, Chrissy! 💗

You are pretty.


Chrissy

Quote from: ChrissyRyan on May 28, 2025, 10:51:19 AMYou are pretty.


Chrissy

Awe! Chrissy, you to love , and thank you so much. 🫂💞💋

Quote from: Alana Ashleigh on April 28, 2025, 06:11:38 PMIt feels so affirming to see my hair getting longer since I started growing it out.  :D

That is so lovely ❤️

Quote from: Lilis on May 28, 2025, 10:49:12 AMThank you so much, Danielle! 💗

Ahahaha, yes it's naturally curly, it's a pain. I'm jeoulous of your straight hair, lol.  ;D

~ Lilis 💗

I am deeply envious of your hair, Lilis. You have naturally what it takes some people a fortune to get through curling irons, hair product and salon fees. :P My hair is naturally in the middle. It's not straight enough to be straight, but not curly enough to be awesome like yours. So either way I need a contraption to make it look decent. I have actual scars on my fingers through using said contraptions... most notably straightening irons to iron my hair lol. It looks okay for a few hours then it's back to an unruly mess. :P I always end up looking like Monica from Friends in that episode where they go the beachside house. >_<

Quote from: Sephirah on June 13, 2025, 08:57:45 AMI am deeply envious of your hair, Lilis. You have naturally what it takes some people a fortune to get through curling irons, hair product and salon fees. :P

QuoteMy hair is naturally in the middle. It's not straight enough to be straight, but not curly enough to be awesome like yours.

QuoteIt looks okay for a few hours then it's back to an unruly mess. :P I always end up looking like Monica from Friends in that episode where they go the beachside house. >_<

Thank you so much, Lauren! 💗

The weird thing is, before I started Gender-Affirming Hormone Therapy (GAHT), my hair was exactly like you described, right in the middle.

Not straight enough to be sleek, not curly enough to be fun just unruly and unpredictable.

But ever since GAHT, the texture has changed.

It's been thinning out into a finer, softer texture, something I've never experienced before, and honestly, I haven't done anything intentional to make that happen.

I'm starting to suspect it might be the hormones, I have an upcoming appointment later this month and plan to ask my provider about it.

I'd love to understand more about what's going on with it!


~ Lilis 🌷

Quote from: Lilis on June 13, 2025, 03:42:31 PMI'd love to understand more about what's going on with it!

Girl, I think we all need more pics of you. With your smile, and your eyes. Outside of the AI stuff. I kind of already know you are gorgeous, Lilis. I think the world deserves to see just how gorgeous you are. <3

Enjoying more updos now it's warming  up  with the Ficcare  maximas  clip. Got the new black one working now after having to bend it so the jaws were clser

Quote from: Sephirah on June 13, 2025, 03:48:22 PMGirl, I think we all need more pics of you. With your smile, and your eyes. Outside of the AI stuff.

I've been thinking about that, honestly.

But I'm still in the middle of a few things, I'm not quite done with laser and electrolysis for facial hair removal yet.

I still want to get my ears pierced (maybe even my nose and lips too), have my hair professionally styled, and get my weight below 170 lbs.

It's all still a few months away. I'm definitely a work in progress, but getting there, step by step.


~ Lilis 🌷

Quote from: Lilis on June 13, 2025, 03:59:58 PMI've been thinking about that, honestly.

But I'm still in the middle of a few things, I'm not quite done with laser and electrolysis for facial hair removal yet.

I still want to get my ears pierced (maybe even my nose and lips too), have my hair professionally styled, and get my weight below 170 lbs.

It's all still a few months away. I'm definitely a work in progress, but getting there, step by step.


~ Lilis 🌷

Lilis, you are falling into the trap every woman falls into. You don't have to be some perfect ideal of who you think you should be, sweetie. You don't have to be some magical, hourglass shaped Disney princess. No one is that unless they have a team of somewhat lecherous animators creating proportions. We... well I.. want to look into the eyes of the girl who's been so uplifting for me and many people here. And it is a little bit selfish, but I kind of want to see the beautiful girl without hiding behind a phone. Totally not to embarrass you by telling you how beautiful you are, Lilis... honest.

Hi Everyone

Some people have hair that's too straight – it just lies flat and won't hold any shape.
Some people have hair that's too curly – it tangles easily and can be hard to manage.
But mine?
It's just right – long, auburn and wavy.  And that's exactly how I like it!

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Northern Star Girl @Lilis @Kim @Sephirah

Sarah I am totally envious of your hair, honestly. And... well just in general. You are gorgeous. And you can't argue because you showed me. So... beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Sarah is quite jaw-droppingly gorgeous. She will never show it here but she is. Trust me.

Quote from: Sephirah on June 13, 2025, 04:08:56 PMLilis, you are falling into the trap every woman falls into. You don't have to be some perfect ideal of who you think you should be, sweetie. You don't have to be some magical, hourglass shaped Disney princess. No one is that unless they have a team of somewhat lecherous animators creating proportions.

QuoteWe... well I.. want to look into the eyes of the girl who's been so uplifting for me and many people here. And it is a little bit selfish, but I kind of want to see the beautiful girl without hiding behind a phone.

I'm not in a place right now where I can step into that kind of visibility.

It's not about hiding, but about honoring where I am emotionally and physically.

I hope you understand.

But thank you again, Lauren, for seeing me, even when I'm not ready to be fully seen.


~ Lilis 🌷

Quote from: Lilis on June 13, 2025, 04:29:56 PMI'm not in a place right now where I can step into that kind of visibility.

It's not about hiding, but about honoring where I am emotionally and physically.

I hope you understand.

But thank you again, Lauren, for seeing me, even when I'm not ready to be fully seen.


~ Lilis 🌷

That's okay, sweetie. Just know that you have a cheerleader waiting for you when you are in that place. <3

Hi Everyone

Lilis, I love how you are doing things step by step.  Just be yourself.  You are you.  Doing the things that make you happy are the important steps.  Facial hair removal, getting your ears or nose or lips pierced, styling your hair and reaching your weight goal are all your choices.  That makes them valid and meaningful.

As Sephirah said: "you do not need to reach some perfect image of who you think you should be."
Like what she said to you, "no one is an ideal Disney princess unless they have a team of animators behind them."   The important thing is that you are real and people already see the beautiful girl you are.  You have been uplifting to others and that shines through more than any photo ever could.

As you know, I lived my life as a female or woman from day one.  I never needed to express myself.  It was simply given.  I was still myself.  Before I left Brisbane for Sydney, I already had long hair and just before I left, I got my ears pierced.  I did change my hair too, but I do not remember exactly when I got it cut into a fringe.  It was probably after I arrived in Sydney.  I think I got a perm for my fringe as well.  It was a new look.

So what am I trying to say?  Follow your dreams.  They will fall into place naturally like they did for me.  Even though I did not really realise what I was doing when I changed my life around, I still made the necessary choices along the way.  To a basic extent I knew, but I did not need a grand plan.  It just happened because it needed to.

You have the knowledge, the information and more resources than I ever did.  You can understand what is really happening.  That gives you the chance to become who you really are.  You are already doing what matters.  Keep going.

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Sephirah @Lilis

I will be honest.. ear piercing scares the bejeezus out of me. There were several times in the Navy where people wanted me to get a tattoo.. but that also freaks me out. If you aren't trying to save my life with a needle... keep it away from me!

Listen to Sarah. She is extremely wise. That kind of goes for everyone. Listen to Sarah. She has been through a lot of stuff and knows a lot of stuff. She is the embodiment of the following:

"The wise person speaks because they have something to say. The fool speaks because they have to say something." I forget who said that but it's true. Take it from the the number one fool. ;D

Hi Sephirah

Quote from: Sephirah on June 13, 2025, 04:55:56 PMI will be honest.. ear piercing scares the bejeezus out of me. There were several times in the Navy where people wanted me to get a tattoo.. but that also freaks me out. If you aren't trying to save my life with a needle... keep it away from me!

Don't be such a wuss!

Quote from: Sephirah on June 13, 2025, 04:55:56 PMListen to Sarah. She is extremely wise. That kind of goes for everyone. Listen to Sarah. She has been through a lot of stuff and knows a lot of stuff. She is the embodiment of the following:

"The wise person speaks because they have something to say. The fool speaks because they have to say something." I forget who said that but it's true. Take it from the the number one fool. ;D

Speak for thyself, oh wise one! :D  ;D  ::)  :-*

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Sephirah

Quote from: Sarah B on June 13, 2025, 05:10:16 PMDon't be such a wuss!

Hah, you are probably right, Sarah. I am a massive wuss. I can deal with 20 operations to keep me functioning but anyone trying to put something in my ears or scar my arms... it freaks me out. ;D I am not even sure why. Just... no. Keep it away from me!

I actually just got another ear piercing a few days ago. I have two in each ear now.. I'm up to 6 piercings now.  :D

Quote from: Lilis on June 13, 2025, 03:59:58 PMI still want to get my ears pierced (maybe even my nose and lips too),

100 percent recommend getting a nose piercing. I got mine done 4 years ago, and love it

Hi Sephirah

You have survived twenty operations like a champ, but a little ear piercing sends you running?  Just book yourself an appointment, call it your 21st operation and you will probably walk in like a pro without even flinching. :D  ;D  ::)  :-*

End result?  A lot of euphoria for yourself!

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Sephirah

Quote from: Sephirah on June 13, 2025, 04:33:31 PMThat's okay, sweetie. Just know that you have a cheerleader waiting for you when you are in that place. <3

Quote from: Sarah B on June 13, 2025, 04:38:56 PMLilis, I love how you are doing things step by step.  Just be yourself.  You are you.  Doing the things that make you happy are the important steps.  Facial hair removal, getting your ears or nose or lips pierced, styling your hair and reaching your weight goal are all your choices.  That makes them valid and meaningful.

Quote from: Sarah B on June 13, 2025, 04:38:56 PMAs Sephirah said: "you do not need to reach some perfect image of who you think you should be."
Like what she said to you, "no one is an ideal Disney princess unless they have a team of animators behind them."  The important thing is that you are real and people already see the beautiful girl you are.  You have been uplifting to others and that shines through more than any photo ever could.

Lauren and Sarah, thank you for being here with such wisdom and warmth. I'm grateful for the reminder that there's no 'perfect version' of womanhood to chase, only the life and body I'm growing into with care and joy.

Your stories and affirmations make me feel like I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be.

Thank you both very much! 💗🌹

~ Lilis 🫂