Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Let me explain. I grew up in churches my Mother was a Sunday school teacher, my grandmother was a traveling evangelist and my older brother was a youth pastor. So I have a lot of experience with Christians. I know its a generalization and not fair to judge a group as a whole but if I see a Cross or a fish symbol I get nervous. Especially now that I am trying to come to terms with being trans.

Please don't be offended by my statement its just my life experiences. When I see symbols or find out someone is religious I try to avoid them when I can at least until I know what type of person they are. I expect intolerance and I have this image of people screaming at people not like them. I should probably talk to my therapist about this...

I can understand where you are coming from Tammy but you really need to take people as you find them.

I have not been involved with any faith, I'm not christened or baptised or whatever else you are supposed to be. I have been left to make up my own mind. I have no problem with people who have strong faith, in truth I am a little envious as they seem to have an inner peace about them. But I do not want to be preached at or judged for not sharing that faith or following their rules. It is that side of religion, of any faith, that I have a strong dislike for.

I know its probably not fair but that has been my experience. I do know a few that are truly good people but from my experience they tend to think their beliefs allow them to be morally superior to everyone.

I know that may be just the ones I have interacted with.

Quote from: tammy753 on May 21, 2026, 05:22:45 PMI know its probably not fair but that has been my experience. I do know a few that are truly good people but from my experience they tend to think their beliefs allow them to be morally superior to everyone.

I know that may be just the ones I have interacted with.

No, it's not just you, I have encountered my fair share over here too. It is absolutely true that they do have this air of moral superiority about them. I find that they are often using the fact they are going to church regularly to offset the fact that they are actually the least christian people you are ever likely to meet! But as I said, You should take people as you find them. For every one bad egg there are a dozen good ones. I'm sorry you seem to have encounted a disproportionate amount of bad eggs in your lifetime.

I consider myself a Christian.  I have an issue with churches. I used to be a Deacon  and was heavily evolved, but I feel that the church has veered from the teachings. They are to busy telling people they are sinning and not looking at themselves.
A relationship with God and transgender are not mutually exclusive. We live in a fallen world. God let us live in this and make our own minds. He didn't make us transgender, he let the world make mistakes and we have to correct what the world made.

I know enough real Christians to distinguish them from MAGAts that have appropriated the name.  The real Christians don't bother me.  In fact, my oldest Internet friend is a devout Christian, and she and I have a long history of curiosity and respect for each other's beliefs (I am a Buddhist).  It is a positive thing.

It is the other kind, the phonies, the MAGAts, who weaponize Jesus in the persecution of marginalized groups, that are the worry.  The real Christians were warned about them in the Bible.

My social isolation and the constant news feeds my be affecting my perceptions. thanks for all the input

Quote from: tammy753 on May 21, 2026, 04:53:17 PMLet me explain. I grew up in churches my Mother was a Sunday school teacher, my grandmother was a traveling evangelist and my older brother was a youth pastor. So I have a lot of experience with Christians. I know its a generalization and not fair to judge a group as a whole but if I see a Cross or a fish symbol I get nervous. Especially now that I am trying to come to terms with being trans.

Please don't be offended by my statement its just my life experiences. When I see symbols or find out someone is religious I try to avoid them when I can at least until I know what type of person they are. I expect intolerance and I have this image of people screaming at people not like them. I should probably talk to my therapist about this...

Trauma and past experiences train our hearts and minds to fear. For me, it's important not to judge myself for those fears, even as I work to alleviate them and get a fair objective view. 

It too me teeny years to shed my fear of a certain race after being traumatized by people if that race as a child. I sometimes hated myself for it taking so long. That hate was counterproductive. 

I had similar issues with Christianity, though no Christians chased me or tried to beat me up (that's somone kind of humor attempt). From the time I was a teen, I watched political battles where the Christian Right opposed the things I held most important. Environment. Equity. Women's rights. And more. 

Then I got into recovery and listed my resentments in Step 4. I asked them to be removed in Step 7 and had to do my part. Through the steps I also found a higher power, though back then the connection was weak. And I would have said at the time that it sure as f—- wasn't a Christian god. 

My part was joining Christian Facebook groups said to be liberal. Through them, I not only knew there were Christians aligned with my values, but I felt it. It was a process. I also learned that even in my massively Trump supporting hometown there were liberal Christian churches. 

I often meet trans people who can't even stomach entering a church. I meet addicts who have abandoned all spirituality. I understand both, stemming from legitimate fear and trauma. 

I'm glad I removed almost all of that with help from others and my Higher Power. 

If I am invited inside a a home that has crosses and other religious items as decoration, I do not feel safe. While there are some religions that are welcoming to everyone, others seem to have been corrupted.

Love always -- Jessica Rose

I feel for you.  I am a Christian and I believe that if I live as Christ directs me, those who I need to talk to will ask me about it.  It never works as God intends if people try to cram their beliefs down other peoples' throats.  In fact, it causes, most times, irreparable damage.  I love everyone.

Quote from: Jessica_Rose on May 22, 2026, 07:48:12 AMIf I am invited inside a a home that has crosses and other religious items as decoration, I do not feel safe. While there are some religions that are welcoming to everyone, others seem to have been corrupted.

Love always -- Jessica Rose

This is what I was trying to explain in ineloquently. I don't think all of religious people are bad but my guard goes up when I see the symbols of I know they are religious.

I'm sorry to those that are religious but that is my experiences.

Let me start by saying that I firmly believe that as long as their beliefs don't interfere or harm others then I support a persons right to their beliefs. That being said I loathe organized religion. I find it to be the source of some of the greatest evil. They want to force their beliefs on others, they tell you who to hate, they try to push their restrictions on others (birth control, abortion ).

I live in a country where the primary base religion is Christianity so I hear more about what they try to pull off. I don't like any organized religion. The Buddhist's of Myanmar, I don't know if they are still committing genocide but it wasn't too long ago.

There are some devout members of organized religion that are wonderful people but there are so many more that aren't. So to the question do I fear Christians, I am wary of them until they show their colours.

Also I do not identify as an atheist, I have seen too many atheists that verbally attack people for their beliefs which I also disagree with. I don't care if a church puts up a nativity scene near Christmas as long as it's not on public land and I believe in other religions putting up religious scenes but again on their own property

    I am am a staunch believer and a devout Christian.  I found a small church in my community. They are very accepting of me and my sweetie.  We are involved in many activities and gatherings and with meals for the sick and homebound members, Sunday School, mid-week Bible Study and prayer group. Most Sundays after morning church I go out to lunch with 4 or 5 church ladies.
I have made certain that many on the Forum have my attention and I have offered interceding prayer in many in my reply comments to members that are experiencing sickness or physical, relationship problems, and other issues.  I have not yet had any tell me to not pray for them.

I appreciate your stated concerns but what you described is not happening where I live.

HUGS, Danielle

Quote from: tammy753 on May 22, 2026, 09:22:34 AMThis is what I was trying to explain in ineloquently. I don't think all of religious people are bad but my guard goes up when I see the symbols of I know they are religious.

I'm sorry to those that are religious but that is my experiences.

@Northern Star Girl You are definitely one of the good ones Danielle! I don't think anyone is doubting that. I hope you don't take offence at the discussion here. Our ire is aimed at a particular type of religious person who hides behind their faith to mask the fact that they are bad people or uses their faith to brow beat or persecute those who don't conform. It is not a slight on the Christian Faith itself. All faith's have this problem, even the Bhuddists as Athena pointed out.

I have encountered enough of these types to be wary of people of faith but I do try to take people as I find them. The vast majority are lovely people.

As I said, I envy those who have true faith. I'm not an aethiest either for the record.

I believe that trans folx should approach Christians cautiously. Unofficial Christian doctrine says that the position on trans people is not one of acceptance, rather they think of us as lost souls who are possessed by demons/satan and who need to be rescued from the evils to which we've fallen prey.

A trans friend of mine was very active in her church. After coming out to her pastor, he immediately betrayed her confidence and told a few others. Then he told others that she was in despair and in need of help and that they needed to reach out to her to try to get her back to the church. She was harassed for months and no words of acceptance were ever spoken from her former pastor.

My neighbors are pastors of a very large church that touts itself as multicultural, non-denominational and very inclusive. They don't know I'm trans. We were having a political/cultural/theological conversation during which I asked them about trans people in their church. I wasn't trying to become a member; I simply wanted to prove wrong the thought that they wouldn't accept the truth about me in a Jesus-like way. I hoped I was wrong/hoped they would accept and embrace me.

In response to my inquiry about trans people in their church, the female pastor replied "Oh, we *have* trans people in our congregation," then paused and added "...but not in leadership positions." I went back to my other friend and when I ran this by her, she confirmed that yes, the Christian church *does* allow trans people, but the agenda is not one of acceptance; it's all about saving us from the evils that beset us. Trans people are not worthy of "leadership" positions as long as they remain broken and cursed. Among many Christians, the goal is to fix us first, then accept us.

Quote from: Courtney G on May 22, 2026, 03:59:45 PMI believe that trans folx should approach Christians cautiously. If you check out current Christian doctrine, the position on trans people of not one of acceptance, rather they think of us as lost souls who are possessed by demons/satan and who need to be rescued from the evils to which we've fallen prey.

A trans friend of mine was very active in her church. After coming out to her pastor, he immediately betrayed her confidence and told a few others. Then he told others that she was in despair and in need of help and that they needed to reach out to her to try to get her back to the church. She was harassed for months and no words of acceptance were ever spoken from her former pastor.

My neighbors are pastors of a very large church that touts itself as multicultural, non-denominational and very inclusive. They don't know I'm trans. We were having a political/cultural/theological conversation during which I asked them about trans people in their church. I wasn't trying to become a member; I simply wanted to prove wrong the thought that they wouldn't accept the truth about me in a Jesus-like way. I hoped I was wrong/hoped they would accept and embrace me.

In response to my inquiry about trans people in their church, the female pastor replied "Oh, we *have* trans people in our congregation," then paused and added "...but not in leadership positions." I went back to my other friend and when I ran this by her, she confirmed that yes, the Christian church *does* allow trans people, but the agenda is not one of acceptance; it's all about saving us from the evils that beset us. Trans people are not worthy of "leadership" positions as long as they remain broken and cursed.

That is NOT how christians are supposed to treat transgender people in the church of England, at least it is certainly not doctrine. Transgender women can be baptised, get married in church and even become ordained ministers. It is not the church that is spitting venom, look at how accepted Danielle is. I'm sorry that has been your experience Courtney. To be fair as someone from the UK religion is not a big thing in a lot of peoples lives, the US does religion very very differently.

Quote from: Stottie Girl on May 22, 2026, 04:25:46 PMThat is NOT how christians are supposed to treat transgender people in the church of England, at least it is certainly not doctrine. Transgender women can be baptised, get married in church and even become ordained ministers. It is not the church that is spitting venom, look at how accepted Danielle is. I'm sorry that has been your experience Courtney. To be fair as someone from the UK religion is not a big thing in a lot of peoples lives, the US does religion very very differently.

Yes, the Church of England / Anglican / Episcopal church is quite different from American megachurch protestantism.    Anglicans tend to be accepting.  The American churches not so much.

Quote from: Stottie Girl on May 22, 2026, 04:25:46 PMThat is NOT how christians are supposed to treat transgender people in the church of England, at least it is certainly not doctrine. Transgender women can be baptised, get married in church and even become ordained ministers. It is not the church that is spitting venom, look at how accepted Danielle is. I'm sorry that has been your experience Courtney. To be fair as someone from the UK religion is not a big thing in a lot of peoples lives, the US does religion very very differently.

I edited my post for clarity. I didn't mean to imply that it's the official position of these churches, but that it's the understanding within the church.

We've seen this before, this surge of conservative power in the U.S. Ronald Reagan refused to admit that AIDS was a thing while Jim and Tammy Fae Baker built a huge following (and amassed a fortunate) telling Christians to love each other while they defrauded their members (and were convicted for it), paid hush money, had affairs and so on. When I think of Jesus as I understand His teachings, I imagine Him burning those churches down (while empty) in the middle of the night, banishing these corrupt "servants of God" and condemning the whole idea of religion as an enterprise.

But here we are again.

I attended a small local church in my previous hometown. Not as a worshipper; they paid me to elevate the level of their music ministry. But I enjoyed the pastors and the community. To me, it was what the church should be: modest and humble, open and inviting. Many members wore name tags with pride stickers on them.

As we've increasingly seen with our economy, wealthy people can't get enough. Once they start amassing a fortune, they can't stop. Once they become powerful, they want more.

But back to the culture: the people in power politically have been pandering to the church while pushing a culture of exclusion of marginalized groups, redlining minority voting districts, even cutting AIDS support funding to African countries as a means to blackmail them for mineral rights. This is the culture that many Christian organizations have bought into.  I could go on and on but I'm tired. I agree with Jesus: take the whole thing down. Strip the intolerant ones of their power. The small churches who are not motivated by profit? Let them set the standard.

"Current Christian Doctrine" is not universal at various factions and especially not at independent Christian churches.

Christian Transgender individuals need to do some searching to find a church that is accepting. A first phone call or visit that includes that question is very premature and will not necessarily reveal the true answer.
See what develops in initial visits. Volunteering and helping out and frequent attendance is a good way to garner initial acceptance.

Obviously attending with proper appearance and dressing conservatively, acceptable
language and actions that should be common sense for any minimally experienced church going person and if mostly
passable there is no reason to initially "come out" to anyone until casual acquaintances and/or friendships develop.

Danielle

I've spent most of my life on a spiritual journey. When I was about 8 years old, I began asking questions that my parents could not answer. They sent us to Sunday School and Vacation Bible School, and we were told that when we turned 10, we could decide for ourselves whether we wanted to continue.

One of my brothers was a Methodist Pastor, and another is a Fundamentalist Christian. My parents see them as wonderfully good people. Yet, I could never find the answers I sought in the Church. I studied on my own and learned many things, from the Bible and from apocryphal writings. What has been said here is absolutely true, and these are not new developments. I was ordained in 2009 through Universal Ministries in Milford, Illinois. I never updated my name change, so my credentials are now invalid.

Christianity grew out of Judaism (Jesus was a Jew), and Judaism was a very sexist group. So it is no surprise to find their teachings (the Torah/Old Testament) are geared toward male superiority. As the priesthood became the central government, they fought hard to stay in power. As various factions splintered off, there was always a power struggle among them. That followed into Christianity as well. So I understand the history and the intent. It doesn't make it right, but many will point to this scripture or that as justification for their actions.

The problem I have with organized religion has more to do with false teachings, and not with the religion or the members as a whole. What many here are reacting to is not Christianity, but Churchianity. Instead of listening to the teachings of Jesus, they spend all of their time celebrating things He never celebrated. They think following Him means performing everything in little rituals, which have little to do with what He came to teach.

I am a Christian, in that I follow the teachings of Jesus, and I can do that better by not associating with people who (in my opinion) got it all wrong. In 1983, my spiritual path led me to the Rosicrucians (the Ancient Mystical Order of the Rose Cross). We are a fraternity of people who seek the truth in all religions. I am now a Twelfth Degree, the highest level in the hierarchy. I laugh at people who say the Illuminati are controlling the world, because that is part of my title in the Order. It means "Enlightened One," not what others think it means.

My current view is that if you strip away religion and view people for who they are: spirits with bodies, you begin to see past the facades. And when that happens, you will see that we are all brothers and sisters living our lives as best we can. We don't need to judge their behavior because most are unaware of what they are doing. Some can be encouraged to change, others will dig their heels in and insist everyone else change.

"It does not matter what you believe; it is the actions you take based on those beliefs that matters."  -- H. Spencer Lewis

Quote from: Lori Dee on May 22, 2026, 05:45:08 PMMy current view is that if you strip away religion and view people for who they are: spirits with bodies, you begin to see past the facades. And when that happens, you will see that we are all brothers and sisters living our lives as best we can. We don't need to judge their behavior because most are unaware of what they are doing. Some can be encouraged to change, others will dig their heels in and insist everyone else change.

"It does not matter what you believe; it is the actions you take based on those beliefs that matters."  -- H. Spencer Lewis

Word Sister! 💕🙏👩👍💕

My wife and I were greatly inspired by the news reports about this study:

https://gap.hks.harvard.edu/transgender-prejudice-reduction-and-opinions-transgender-rights-results-mediation-analysis

What really inspired us was the idea that when a transphobic person discovers that they know a trans person, they are likely to become an ally. That gave us the courage to be more conspicuous instead of hiding in the name of privacy and modesty and courtesy. Many people surprised us.

The most "Christian" person whom we knew -- the one who was most likely to be the most disappointed -- died before we had the chance to be brave with her. We wonder what might have happened if we had The Conversation, but all we can imagine is a wider fissure between her and us. She valued authoritarianism and her righteousness above living love.

Fortunately, I have known people of various religions who are very open-minded and who celebrate diversity. As far as I can see, anyone of any religion can do so. The people who don't... they must be thinking that they're benefitting in some way, so I feel sorry for them and hope that they'll wake up.

Quote from: Moonflower on May 24, 2026, 01:08:09 PMMy wife and I were greatly inspired by the news reports about this study:

https://gap.hks.harvard.edu/transgender-prejudice-reduction-and-opinions-transgender-rights-results-mediation-analysis

What really inspired us was the idea that when a transphobic person discovers that they know a trans person, they are likely to become an ally.

I've found this to be true often, though I'm acknowledging the people who discovered the opposite with loved ones 💔

I've socially transitioned slowly, for myself or maybe out of fear. Now that I aimed present utterly female, no one has rejected me. I've had two very conservative acquaintances accept me. As a more openly trans woman, I can more easily share with others GNC people and support them (and they support me). 

Quote from: tammy753 on May 21, 2026, 04:53:17 PMLet me explain. I grew up in churches my Mother was a Sunday school teacher, my grandmother was a traveling evangelist and my older brother was a youth pastor. So I have a lot of experience with Christians. I know its a generalization and not fair to judge a group as a whole but if I see a Cross or a fish symbol I get nervous. Especially now that I am trying to come to terms with being trans.

Please don't be offended by my statement its just my life experiences. When I see symbols or find out someone is religious I try to avoid them when I can at least until I know what type of person they are. I expect intolerance and I have this image of people screaming at people not like them. I should probably talk to my therapist about this...

I don't know if it's that I am "afraid" of them I just don't really agree with them.

I think alot of religion is just political to be honest. People who can't follow their own moral compass or think for themselves usually turn me off anyway.

I came to the conclusion that my religion is personal. If somebody is trying to impose their's on me then that tells me everything I need to know about that person.

To be honest I regret starting this topic, I stand by what I said but I didn't explain what I meant well. I do not wish harm on them and would be open to getting to know them but the history I have with the larger group was not positive.

Not me. Genuine Christians don't make me afraid of them.

  @tammy753
Dear Tammy:
    Thank you for your posting and reply comment. 
Danielle

Quote from: tammy753 on May 27, 2026, 02:46:55 PMTo be honest I regret starting this topic, I stand by what I said but I didn't explain what I meant well. I do not wish harm on them and would be open to getting to know them but the history I have with the larger group was not positive.

Quote from: Northern Star Girl on May 22, 2026, 10:48:21 AMI am am a staunch believer and a devout Christian.  I found a small church in my community. They are very accepting of me and my sweetie.  We are involved in many activities and gatherings and with meals for the sick and homebound members, Sunday School, mid-week Bible Study and prayer group. Most Sundays after morning church I go out to lunch with 4 or 5 church ladies.
I have made certain that many on the Forum have my attention and I have offered interceding prayer in many in my reply comments to members that are experiencing sickness or physical, relationship problems, and other issues.  I have not yet had any tell me to not pray for them.

I appreciate your stated concerns but what you described is not happening where I live.

HUGS, Danielle

Reminds me of a brother that abandoned a new born son, remarried, got into southern baptist, was born again.
He then proceeded to preach to my mother who is Catholic that she was going to Hell, if she was not born again.

I pray every night try to live a Christian life, I have sinned being unfaithful to my former life.

Like you I don't care to be preached to I'll fine my own way and peace.

Yesterday I was deeply supported and affirmed by an elder in the Mormon church in my Trump loving city. 

I'm glad I let him surprise me. 

Wow congrats!

Some on here might recall my early days on this forum. I came from a fundamentalist Christian background, and attempted to maintain engagement in the Christian community while transitioning.

When news got out at the church I was attending at the time that I was transitioning, I got chased out of the church at gunpoint along with my wife and kids. Former "friends" from that church threatened to kill me and harm my family.

Yes, I would say I am afraid of Christians, at least at the broad categorical level. I no longer use the label of Christian to describe myself. My beliefs haven't really changed, but Christianity has come to represent things that I want no part in. I believe in and follow Jesus, and leave it at that now. There are two nearby accepting churches that I maintain some loose engagement with, but even then I am careful about how much I let the people get involved in my life.

Thanks for sharing your story. This the kind of reaction I expect, unfortunately.

I was doing some research on my great-great-grandfather. A census record listed his religion as "Friends," which I had never seen before. The Religious Society of Friends is most commonly known as Quakers. They are Christians, and some are very accepting.

Those that meet in strong Christian areas tend to have "Programmed Meetings," which are similar to Christian churches in that they have a pastor and their services include sermons, singing, and prayers. Typically, these are less accepting than the original Quakers, who do not engage in those practices.

The other group of Quakers does not have "church services". They have "Unprogrammed Meetings" at a meeting house, which can be a member's home or a separate meeting place. These meetings mostly involve sitting in a circle or square, facing each other in silence for about an hour. The idea is that God/Spirit/Creator can speak through anyone when appropriate. The only time any member speaks is when they feel moved to do so by the Divine. After the meeting, there may be a social gathering to get to know each other, snacks, or another optional activity.

I find this type of worship appealing to my sense of spirituality. If this might interest you, do an internet search for Quaker meetings in your area. Check their website for information on Programmed vs. Unprogrammed meetings, inclusivity, new-member information, etc.

I feel that too many people abandon their spirituality because they feel a lack of connection to others who may feel the same way. Perhaps the Quakers are what you are seeking. Or not. But since they are not as mainstream as they were 200 years ago, many people know little about them.

It doesn't hurt to check them out. Message them and ask questions. If it feels right, meet a member and speak with them, and maybe ask to be invited to a meeting.