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I am afraid of Christians, anyone else?

Started by tammy753, Yesterday at 04:53:17 PM

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tammy753

Let me explain. I grew up in churches my Mother was a Sunday school teacher, my grandmother was a traveling evangelist and my older brother was a youth pastor. So I have a lot of experience with Christians. I know its a generalization and not fair to judge a group as a whole but if I see a Cross or a fish symbol I get nervous. Especially now that I am trying to come to terms with being trans.

Please don't be offended by my statement its just my life experiences. When I see symbols or find out someone is religious I try to avoid them when I can at least until I know what type of person they are. I expect intolerance and I have this image of people screaming at people not like them. I should probably talk to my therapist about this...


Stottie Girl

I can understand where you are coming from Tammy but you really need to take people as you find them.

I have not been involved with any faith, I'm not christened or baptised or whatever else you are supposed to be. I have been left to make up my own mind. I have no problem with people who have strong faith, in truth I am a little envious as they seem to have an inner peace about them. But I do not want to be preached at or judged for not sharing that faith or following their rules. It is that side of religion, of any faith, that I have a strong dislike for.
A wise man once said don't judge a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes, that way when you judge him you're a mile away and you have his shoes!

Never trust a man who, when left alone in a room with a tea cozy, doesn't try it on - Billy Connolley

tammy753

I know its probably not fair but that has been my experience. I do know a few that are truly good people but from my experience they tend to think their beliefs allow them to be morally superior to everyone.

I know that may be just the ones I have interacted with.
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Stottie Girl

Quote from: tammy753 on Yesterday at 05:22:45 PMI know its probably not fair but that has been my experience. I do know a few that are truly good people but from my experience they tend to think their beliefs allow them to be morally superior to everyone.

I know that may be just the ones I have interacted with.
No, it's not just you, I have encountered my fair share over here too. It is absolutely true that they do have this air of moral superiority about them. I find that they are often using the fact they are going to church regularly to offset the fact that they are actually the least christian people you are ever likely to meet! But as I said, You should take people as you find them. For every one bad egg there are a dozen good ones. I'm sorry you seem to have encounted a disproportionate amount of bad eggs in your lifetime.
A wise man once said don't judge a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes, that way when you judge him you're a mile away and you have his shoes!

Never trust a man who, when left alone in a room with a tea cozy, doesn't try it on - Billy Connolley
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Dawn Kellie

I consider myself a Christian.  I have an issue with churches. I used to be a Deacon  and was heavily evolved, but I feel that the church has veered from the teachings. They are to busy telling people they are sinning and not looking at themselves.
A relationship with God and transgender are not mutually exclusive. We live in a fallen world. God let us live in this and make our own minds. He didn't make us transgender, he let the world make mistakes and we have to correct what the world made.
D. KELLIE Kn.

It's harder to love and create than hate and destroy. Love and creation takes more energy. Where hate and destruction can be done with a single word that can haunt you for a life time.

KathyLauren

I know enough real Christians to distinguish them from MAGAts that have appropriated the name.  The real Christians don't bother me.  In fact, my oldest Internet friend is a devout Christian, and she and I have a long history of curiosity and respect for each other's beliefs (I am a Buddhist).  It is a positive thing.

It is the other kind, the phonies, the MAGAts, who weaponize Jesus in the persecution of marginalized groups, that are the worry.  The real Christians were warned about them in the Bible.
2015-07-04 Awakening; 2015-11-15 Out to self; 2016-06-22 Out to wife; 2016-10-27 First time presenting in public; 2017-01-20 Started HRT!!; 2017-04-20 Out publicly; 2017-07-10 Legal name change; 2019-02-15 Approval for GRS; 2019-08-02 Official gender change; 2020-03-11 GRS; 2020-09-17 New birth certificate

tammy753

My social isolation and the constant news feeds my be affecting my perceptions. thanks for all the input
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KristaFairchild

Quote from: tammy753 on Yesterday at 04:53:17 PMLet me explain. I grew up in churches my Mother was a Sunday school teacher, my grandmother was a traveling evangelist and my older brother was a youth pastor. So I have a lot of experience with Christians. I know its a generalization and not fair to judge a group as a whole but if I see a Cross or a fish symbol I get nervous. Especially now that I am trying to come to terms with being trans.

Please don't be offended by my statement its just my life experiences. When I see symbols or find out someone is religious I try to avoid them when I can at least until I know what type of person they are. I expect intolerance and I have this image of people screaming at people not like them. I should probably talk to my therapist about this...


Trauma and past experiences train our hearts and minds to fear. For me, it's important not to judge myself for those fears, even as I work to alleviate them and get a fair objective view. 

It too me teeny years to shed my fear of a certain race after being traumatized by people if that race as a child. I sometimes hated myself for it taking so long. That hate was counterproductive. 

I had similar issues with Christianity, though no Christians chased me or tried to beat me up (that's somone kind of humor attempt). From the time I was a teen, I watched political battles where the Christian Right opposed the things I held most important. Environment. Equity. Women's rights. And more. 

Then I got into recovery and listed my resentments in Step 4. I asked them to be removed in Step 7 and had to do my part. Through the steps I also found a higher power, though back then the connection was weak. And I would have said at the time that it sure as f—- wasn't a Christian god. 

My part was joining Christian Facebook groups said to be liberal. Through them, I not only knew there were Christians aligned with my values, but I felt it. It was a process. I also learned that even in my massively Trump supporting hometown there were liberal Christian churches. 

I often meet trans people who can't even stomach entering a church. I meet addicts who have abandoned all spirituality. I understand both, stemming from legitimate fear and trauma. 

I'm glad I removed almost all of that with help from others and my Higher Power. 

Jessica_Rose

If I am invited inside a a home that has crosses and other religious items as decoration, I do not feel safe. While there are some religions that are welcoming to everyone, others seem to have been corrupted.

Love always -- Jessica Rose
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AlisonM

I feel for you.  I am a Christian and I believe that if I live as Christ directs me, those who I need to talk to will ask me about it.  It never works as God intends if people try to cram their beliefs down other peoples' throats.  In fact, it causes, most times, irreparable damage.  I love everyone.
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tammy753

Quote from: Jessica_Rose on Today at 07:48:12 AMIf I am invited inside a a home that has crosses and other religious items as decoration, I do not feel safe. While there are some religions that are welcoming to everyone, others seem to have been corrupted.

Love always -- Jessica Rose

This is what I was trying to explain in ineloquently. I don't think all of religious people are bad but my guard goes up when I see the symbols of I know they are religious.

I'm sorry to those that are religious but that is my experiences.
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Athena

Let me start by saying that I firmly believe that as long as their beliefs don't interfere or harm others then I support a persons right to their beliefs. That being said I loathe organized religion. I find it to be the source of some of the greatest evil. They want to force their beliefs on others, they tell you who to hate, they try to push their restrictions on others (birth control, abortion ).

I live in a country where the primary base religion is Christianity so I hear more about what they try to pull off. I don't like any organized religion. The Buddhist's of Myanmar, I don't know if they are still committing genocide but it wasn't too long ago.

There are some devout members of organized religion that are wonderful people but there are so many more that aren't. So to the question do I fear Christians, I am wary of them until they show their colours.

Also I do not identify as an atheist, I have seen too many atheists that verbally attack people for their beliefs which I also disagree with. I don't care if a church puts up a nativity scene near Christmas as long as it's not on public land and I believe in other religions putting up religious scenes but again on their own property
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Northern Star Girl

    I am am a staunch believer and a devout Christian.  I found a small church in my community. They are very accepting of me and my sweetie.  We are involved in many activities and gatherings and with meals for the sick and homebound members, Sunday School, mid-week Bible Study and prayer group. Most Sundays after morning church I go out to lunch with 4 or 5 church ladies.
I have made certain that many on the Forum have my attention and I have offered interceding prayer in many in my reply comments to members that are experiencing sickness or physical, relationship problems, and other issues.  I have not yet had any tell me to not pray for them.

I appreciate your stated concerns but what you described is not happening where I live.

HUGS, Danielle

Quote from: tammy753 on Today at 09:22:34 AMThis is what I was trying to explain in ineloquently. I don't think all of religious people are bad but my guard goes up when I see the symbols of I know they are religious.

I'm sorry to those that are religious but that is my experiences.
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Stottie Girl

@Northern Star Girl You are definitely one of the good ones Danielle! I don't think anyone is doubting that. I hope you don't take offence at the discussion here. Our ire is aimed at a particular type of religious person who hides behind their faith to mask the fact that they are bad people or uses their faith to brow beat or persecute those who don't conform. It is not a slight on the Christian Faith itself. All faith's have this problem, even the Bhuddists as Athena pointed out.

I have encountered enough of these types to be wary of people of faith but I do try to take people as I find them. The vast majority are lovely people.

As I said, I envy those who have true faith. I'm not an aethiest either for the record.
A wise man once said don't judge a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes, that way when you judge him you're a mile away and you have his shoes!

Never trust a man who, when left alone in a room with a tea cozy, doesn't try it on - Billy Connolley