Susan's Place Transgender Resources

My wife (43) is a very recent transwoman. I want to give her a little "congrats on being a girl!" giftbox with some cute, funny, and useful stuff to start her journey into woman-hood.

There are of course things she's already mentioned to have an interest in, like skin care, make up, and hair removal. I will include some of that in the giftbox.

But I also wonder... transwomen of the internet: what item(s) would you have liked to have starting out? Or maybe would still like to have if you were given such a giftbox?

Do you have any other relevant ideas to include?

Thank you in advance!

Edit: changed the title to include the word "item(s)" because I think my question was a bit too general before oops

A blouse? A makeup class? Nail salon? Understanding? Caring?
The absolute best is a spouse that accepts and possibly even welcomes the change, and that makes the newly out transwoman feel understood and appreciated. So, the exact content of the "congrats" is perhpas not what matter most, as long as the message is clear.

Truthfully, I wish I could've come out when I was 19 like I wanted. I would suggest a medium-sized black purse.

Quote from: Finally Anna on July 21, 2026, 06:52:52 PMThe absolute best is a spouse that accepts and possibly even welcomes the change, and that makes the newly out transwoman feel understood and appreciated.

Thankfully she often remarks that she would never have even considered transitioning if it wasn't for my motivational support, so I do hope I'm already supplying that for her. Of course I don't know if I can ever truly make her feel understood because I'm cis myself, but I do tell her I appreciate her a lot and hope this giftbox will make that appreciation a bit more tangible :)

Quote from: bellesparkles on July 21, 2026, 07:04:09 PMThankfully she often remarks that she would never have even considered transitioning if it wasn't for my motivational support, so I do hope I'm already supplying that for her. Of course I don't know if I can ever truly make her feel understood because I'm cis myself, but I do tell her I appreciate her a lot and hope this giftbox will make that appreciation a bit more tangible :)

Oh, I'm sure that she will love it. You may get some waterworks going, though. So, have a box of Kleenex nearby.

A supporting family. My story is posted here several times but that is the one thing I wish I had. Well I also wish I had been braver and came out in the 90's.

Quote from: tammy753 on July 21, 2026, 07:25:43 PMA supporting family. My story is posted here several times but that is the one thing I wish I had. Well I also wish I had been braver and came out in the 90's.

You and me both.

Hello Belle,

I'm Lori Dee. Welcome to Susan's Place!

I see that this is your first post, so allow me to offer our standard Welcome Package. No matter who you are, you are always welcome at Susan's Place.

We want to get to know you. Please stop by our Introductions Forum (https://www.susans.org/index.php?board=8.0) and introduce yourself.

I think jewelry would make a nice gift. It doesn't need to be expensive or fancy, just something from the heart that she can cherish for years to come.

As a Significant Other, you may be interested in our Significant Others Forum. It is a special place set aside for spouses, family, friends, and allies to share their experiences as they support their loved one in their journey. You can find that forum here:

https://www.susans.org/index.php?board=26.0

You are certainly welcome to browse the forums and continue to ask questions or share your comments and experiences too. We all learn from each other.

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@bellesparkles
@Sarah B
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Quote from: Finally Anna on July 21, 2026, 06:52:52 PMA blouse? A makeup class? Nail salon? Understanding? Caring?
The absolute best is a spouse that accepts and possibly even welcomes the change, and that makes the newly out transwoman feel understood and appreciated. So, the exact content of the "congrats" is perhpas not what matter most, as long as the message is clear.

Yes! What she said! 😃

Welcome Belle!


Chrissy

hi i am nicole i am 1 month post op the thing i wish i started life with was being a girl as a guy i always did dtuff girls do i identify as a girl early in life but did nothing about it until recently i went through my transtion then 1 month ago had my sexual reassigment surgery as a kid i felt more like a girl than a guy so now as a girl i feel complete

For me, the most affirming things are the simple, personal items that cis women take for granted and/or that I might have dreamed about but felt guilty over, such as underwear (bras and panties).

Also:
A female razor, for legs, underarms, etc.
Foundation or blurring primer - makeup basics
Sleepwear!
Camis/tank tops
Cute socks
Deodorant or perfume
Maybe a magazine intended for women

Colorful things, like a lavender or yellow water bottle. Men aren't supposed to have colorful things, even if they like them. Women (such as your spouse) are allowed to.

Basically, anything that's considered female-coded and off-limits to men.

Quote from: bellesparkles on July 21, 2026, 06:46:13 PMMy wife (43) is a very recent transwoman. I want to give her a little "congrats on being a girl!" giftbox with some cute, funny, and useful stuff to start her journey into woman-hood.

There are of course things she's already mentioned to have an interest in, like skin care, make up, and hair removal. I will include some of that in the giftbox.

But I also wonder... transwomen of the internet: what item(s) would you have liked to have starting out? Or maybe would still like to have if you were given such a giftbox?

Do you have any other relevant ideas to include?

Thank you in advance!

Edit: changed the title to include the word "item(s)" because I think my question was a bit too general before oops

Any kind of perfume or fragrance is nice. Shower gels and body wash are good too. Dove and Olay make some really good ones.

Quote from: bellesparkles on July 21, 2026, 07:04:09 PMThankfully she often remarks that she would never have even considered transitioning if it wasn't for my motivational support, so I do hope I'm already supplying that for her. Of course I don't know if I can ever truly make her feel understood because I'm cis myself, but I do tell her I appreciate her a lot and hope this giftbox will make that appreciation a bit more tangible :)

The above would have been enough for me.

But a nice piece of jewelry, a trip to the nail salon and doing makeup together would have been much appreciated

Nice body washes and moisturisers. The good ones!

Quote from: bellesparkles on July 21, 2026, 07:04:09 PMOf course I don't know if I can ever truly make her feel understood because I'm cis myself, but I do tell her I appreciate her a lot and hope this giftbox will make that appreciation a bit more tangible :)

I think you provide world-class understanding!
Encouraging transition and providing comfort, care and tokens like the gift box, is probably the most supportive and loving thing a newly out transwoman can get.
Just continue like you do. I can assure you that it is very appreciated.
💕

It's very nice that she has a supportive spouse.

I would recommend some black pantyhose or a nude hose to go with her skirts.

Also, maybe suggest that she get her ears pierced so that she can wear some cute earrings and necklace combos.

Quote from: bellesparkles on July 21, 2026, 07:04:09 PMThankfully she often remarks that she would never have even considered transitioning if it wasn't for my motivational support, so I do hope I'm already supplying that for her.

I agree that your greatest gift for her is this. Knowing she has you there is of great value.

Adding to that, maybe, a dinner out or a girls out with her.
I mean, the whole package...hair, makeup, dress up and go out someplace both of you like and that can do together, where she can enjoy life as herself with you on her side. Check that it is a friendly place and go for it.
Those first memories being happy being herself are forever.

And congratulations for being such a wonderful woman.

These are some amazing ideas, thank you girls!

I also really like the additional idea of taking her out for a girl's night and going for the works by getting our hair and nails done etc. I will definitely put some work into finding out safe places to do this <3

I know I'll be a bundle of nerves after my surgery.  After the initial recovery, I'd want a spa day where I can be pampered and relax for hours.  Massage, facial, sauna, beauty treatments, decadent food and beverages, etc.  It's a bit spendy but so worth it!

Support from others is good to always have.

Quote from: NancyDrew1930 on July 22, 2026, 05:07:05 AMIt's very nice that she has a supportive spouse.

I would recommend some black pantyhose or a nude hose to go with her skirts.

Also, maybe suggest that she get her ears pierced so that she can wear some cute earrings and necklace combos.

I didn't even think about ear piercing and earrings, probably because it is so much a part of me now.

If she doesn't already have her ears pierced take her out for a suprise trip.

Hi Belle

My name is Sarah and I would also like to formally, Welcome you to Susan's Place!

I see that other members of Susan's have also welcomed you as well.

Belle,  your wife is fortunate to have someone who is putting so much love, thought and care into supporting her.

I still believe that your acceptance, encouragement and willingness to share these experiences with her are the greatest gifts you can give.  The gift box will make that love tangible, while a girls' day or evening together could create beautiful memories that she will treasure for years.

There has been so much wisdom in the replies here.  The suggestions of jewellery, perfume, a purse, lovely body products, makeup, earrings and other affirming everyday items are wonderful.  I especially love the idea of getting your hair and nails done together before going somewhere safe and welcoming.  As several posters have wisely said, it is not only the items themselves that matter.  It is the message behind them: "I see you, I accept you and I am happy to be beside you."

Please let us know how it goes.  I suspect Laura may be right about keeping the tissues nearby!

Once you feel comfortable here, it would be appreciated if you add a little bit more about yourself in the other forums and threads.  I would appreciate it very much as, I'm always interested in learning something new about new members.

In addition members of Susan's will more than likely discuss problems or issues that are similar to yours as most have experienced these issues as well.

Please keep in mind when posting that this is an ALL AGES PUBLIC Forum and the internet never forgets.  Do not post anything that you do not want to be made public.

Take care and all the best for the future.

Once again, Welcome to Susan's Place!

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Devlyn  @Jessica_Rose  @Mariah  @Northern Star Girl  @Lori Dee @Charlotte Kitty
@bellesparkles

Quote from: NancyDrew1930 on July 22, 2026, 05:07:05 AMAlso, maybe suggest that she get her ears pierced so that she can wear some cute earrings and necklace combos.

Thank you! She happened to have very recently gotten her ears pierced as a first step into some gender affirming self care, so to speak. So you are very much on the same page as her!

She's still in the healing stages of her earpiercings so she can't change to different earrings yet, but thanks to this suggestion I've been inspired to search the internet for a cute earring-necklace-bracelet-anklet combo! In fact, I'm doing so as we speak haha

It's going to be a while before the giftbox is ready though, because thanks to this suggestion:

Quote from: Courtney G on July 21, 2026, 09:58:41 PMMaybe a magazine intended for women

I've also found the perfect magazine! It's a Cosmo t-girl edition (I found it online, made by Transplants Zine. I didn't know of it, but you ladies might.)
I've ordered an edition of the magazine, but because I'm located in Europe it's going to take about a month before it gets here.

To look at the bright side: I guess that means more time to fill up the giftbox!

A woman friend to go shopping with you and give honest feedback on what looked good on me was helpful.

Note, that does NOT have to be on your first in person clothing shop, just some early shops.
Also it is less unnerving using the fitting rooms with another lady with and nearby you, until that is no longer a big deal.

Online shopping reduces the need for this.  But it can always be nice to shop with a friend.

Quote from: bellesparkles on July 23, 2026, 06:18:11 PMThank you! She happened to have very recently gotten her ears pierced as a first step into some gender affirming self care, so to speak. So you are very much on the same page as her!

She's still in the healing stages of her earpiercings so she can't change to different earrings yet, but thanks to this suggestion I've been inspired to search the internet for a cute earring-necklace-bracelet-anklet combo! In fact, I'm doing so as we speak haha

It's going to be a while before the giftbox is ready though, because thanks to this suggestion:

Your welcome.  Although she might want to start wearing other earrings sooner.  If you search the forum you'll find my story with getting my ears pierced, and I started wearing other, lighter earrings a lot sooner than most people expected, since my earrings kept wanting to imbed into my earlobe (especially since the backing was really tiny and wasn't spreading the pressure), so I switched them out about a month after the second piercing to use bullet backs, and I've been fine ever since.  But her mileage may vary.

https://www.susans.org/index.php?topic=249435.0

Written with a lot of humility and a very soft pen/voice
My personal feeling is that a giftbox that is perhaps presented in stages, as 2-3 separate ones, where they kind of build on one another to form the the whole pacakge, would be super nice. Meaning to separate them a bit in time over a period of two weeks or so.

Quote from: ChrissyRyan on July 23, 2026, 06:40:20 PMA woman friend to go shopping with you and give honest feedback on what looked good on me was helpful.

And I can second Chrissy's experience also from the other side, that it can be quite nice for your wife to accompany you when shopping for clothes and provide feedback on what looks good. At least for me there was a huge difference in clothes shopping for my wife while being the old male me vs now being the new femme me.

A really nice necklace she can wear everyday to reminder her of this moment. I am sentimental about things like this and I wear the same pendant necklace I had when I was younger. It reminds me of all the trials and tribulations I've gone though. It is the one constant that I have had ever since I first was able to buy my own feminine things as a teenager. I have replaced the chain about three times but the pendant (even though to some it is cheap and nasty) has a lot of meaning for me.

Can I also just say what an incredible gift you are giving and what amazing support you are showing to you wife. It's one of the nicest gestures I've read on here. You should be proud of yourself!

Quote from: Stottie Girl on July 24, 2026, 08:54:12 AMCan I also just say what an incredible gift you are giving and what amazing support you are showing to you wife. It's one of the nicest gestures I've read on here. You should be proud of yourself!

Thank you!! That's such a nice thing to hear, it makes me tear up!

If you're ever in these parts again, let me know. We'll go and eat a stroopwafel 😁

Quote from: bellesparkles on July 24, 2026, 06:27:54 PMThank you!! That's such a nice thing to hear, it makes me tear up!

If you're ever in these parts again, let me know. We'll go and eat a stroopwafel 😁

Ha, I think I need to stay away from the stroopwaffles for a while, my waistline would not thank me!

Thanks Belle, I haven't been for a few years, I've been to Amsterdam, Rotterdam and Delft (accidently, took a wrong turn!). I'm thinking of going to Oosterbeek and Arnham some day too, I recently researched the history of my great uncle Jabez who died there (he was a glider trooper in the first wave) I inherited his medals when I was younger and have always been fascinated by him. It would be nice to touch base with a place that has special meaning to my family, one day anyway!

Quote from: Stottie Girl on July 25, 2026, 03:09:44 AMHa, I think I need to stay away from the stroopwaffles for a while, my waistline would not thank me!

Thanks Belle, I haven't been for a few years, I've been to Amsterdam, Rotterdam and Delft (accidently, took a wrong turn!). I'm thinking of going to Oosterbeek and Arnham some day too, I recently researched the history of my great uncle Jabez who died there (he was a glider trooper in the first wave) I inherited his medals when I was younger and have always been fascinated by him. It would be nice to touch base with a place that has special meaning to my family, one day anyway!

That's an interesting family history indeed! I actually live very close to Arnhem, just a 30 min drive. It is so rich in history, very impressive and educational.

Quote from: bellesparkles on July 26, 2026, 05:51:21 AMThat's an interesting family history indeed! I actually live very close to Arnhem, just a 30 min drive. It is so rich in history, very impressive and educational.

Well you never know, we might bump into each other over stroopwaffles one day after all ha ha! Small world!

A lovely higher voice.

However, I have noted two women in the public eye who have low voices.  I do not I know if they are transgender or not, it is not any of my business. 

I think a low voice for a female can hinder "male fail."  I get self conscious about this for myself. 

Quote from: ChrissyRyan on July 26, 2026, 02:31:23 PMHowever, I have noted two women in the public eye who have low voices.  I do not I know if they are transgender or not, it is not any of my business. 

One of the all-time classic feminine beauties was Lauren Bacall. She had a lower voice that many found very sexy. I don't worry about my voice much anymore, except on the phone.

my name is nicole a post op mtf trans the item i wish i started out with is a vagina i hated being a guy and now that i am a girl my life is complete there is nothing better for me now i have the gender of the perosn i want to be and will not vhange anything about it

Back when I was a guy my wife gave me a thin necklace with her initial and a heart pendant on it.

I really loved it.

I don't know where it went because I hibernated for a long time

If I still had it, it would be around my neck now 

I gave her the gift box!

She really loves it, especially the purse and jewelry. She said "how did you know I was looking for bags and thinking about jewelry? I didn't even tell you about that yet!" so I could answer "I didn't know, the ladies on this forum did."
And I gave her the link so she can have a look. Who knows, she might sign up as well :)

Thanks everyone for your great suggestions!

Quote from: bellesparkles on August 15, 2026, 05:51:28 AMI gave her the gift box!

She really loves it, especially the purse and jewelry. She said "how did you know I was looking for bags and thinking about jewelry? I didn't even tell you about that yet!" so I could answer "I didn't know, the ladies on this forum did."
And I gave her the link so she can have a look. Who knows, she might sign up as well :)

Thanks everyone for your great suggestions!

That's awesome Belle! I wish someone would buy me a purse and jewelry! You have done an amazing thing there, you should be very proud of yourself, It speaks volumes about your character. Your partner is very lucky to have you.

Quote from: bellesparkles on August 15, 2026, 05:51:28 AMI gave her the gift box! She really loves it, especially the purse and jewelry.

I just smile from ear to ear when reading this. Absolutely fantastic!

Quote from: bellesparkles on August 15, 2026, 05:51:28 AMI gave her the gift box!

She really loves it, especially the purse and jewelry. She said "how did you know I was looking for bags and thinking about jewelry? I didn't even tell you about that yet!" so I could answer "I didn't know, the ladies on this forum did."
And I gave her the link so she can have a look. Who knows, she might sign up as well :)

Thanks everyone for your great suggestions!

I am glad she liked her gift.

That is awesome, Belle!

Glad she likes her gift box.

Quote from: bellesparkles on August 15, 2026, 05:51:28 AMI gave her the gift box!

She really loves it, especially the purse and jewelry. She said "how did you know I was looking for bags and thinking about jewelry? I didn't even tell you about that yet!" so I could answer "I didn't know, the ladies on this forum did."
And I gave her the link so she can have a look. Who knows, she might sign up as well :)

Thanks everyone for your great suggestions!

That is so awesome! I'm glad that she liked it.

Belle, I can't express how happy your gift makes me feel.

Thankyou for making my day

So yesterday I had an appointment to meet my gender affirming doctor.

I had my bp taken before I went in and it was 160 over 100.

It hasn't been that high since I had my double bypass.

Obviously I was anxious.

The doctor was pretty friendly. Quite matter of fact asking questions, explaining things that a lot of people here have already explained to me before.

She started asking questions and I pulled out my medical file of everything I've been through in the last 4 years and I could see the excitement in her eyes because it simplifies things.

She asked questions about what I want and I said I just want to know if E is for me. I don't know exactly who I am despite everything I am experiencing heads towards trans.

I added I have been deeply in euphoria for a while but I have a relationship I can't lose.

She asked about my gender issues growing up... blah blah blah, my burrying it, and I said that I know it never goes away.

She just agreed.

And then all of a sudden she gave me a referral for a blood test, saying that despite all the information I gave her she needs a baseline.

AND WOW, I got up to leave and she had these bright wide open eyes and she said  " I'm so excited"

Oh, I forgot, she went through the list of E ingestion types, ruled a listed through everything all the girls here have suggested, leaving patches and gel.

She started explaining gel and I said there is a bottle of gel at home that my wife has been using.

Soooo......

PS
I checked my bp this afternoon
125/75.  Phew

If anybody knows Talking Heads

How Did I Get Here?

Quote from: Petunia on August 19, 2026, 05:15:12 AMAND WOW, I got up to leave and she had these bright wide open eyes and she said  " I'm so excited"

That sentence says everything!
💕

Quote from: Petunia on August 19, 2026, 05:15:12 AMSo yesterday I had an appointment to meet my gender affirming doctor.

I had my bp taken before I went in and it was 160 over 100.

It hasn't been that high since I had my double bypass.

Obviously I was anxious.

The doctor was pretty friendly. Quite matter of fact asking questions, explaining things that a lot of people here have already explained to me before.

She started asking questions and I pulled out my medical file of everything I've been through in the last 4 years and I could see the excitement in her eyes because it simplifies things.

She asked questions about what I want and I said I just want to know if E is for me. I don't know exactly who I am despite everything I am experiencing heads towards trans.

I added I have been deeply in euphoria for a while but I have a relationship I can't lose.

She asked about my gender issues growing up... blah blah blah, my burrying it, and I said that I know it never goes away.

She just agreed.

And then all of a sudden she gave me a referral for a blood test, saying that despite all the information I gave her she needs a baseline.

AND WOW, I got up to leave and she had these bright wide open eyes and she said  " I'm so excited"

Oh, I forgot, she went through the list of E ingestion types, ruled a listed through everything all the girls here have suggested, leaving patches and gel.

She started explaining gel and I said there is a bottle of gel at home that my wife has been using.

Soooo......

PS
I checked my bp this afternoon
125/75.  Phew

If anybody knows Talking Heads

How Did I Get Here?

This is so amazing! Thank you for sharing this, it is of a "faith in humanity restored" quality.

Honestly, this is how every single doctor, no every single PERSON, should be reacting to the news that someone is finally discovering themselves and getting the courage to live their best life.

You can be very proud of yourself. Well done!

Totally agree. hugs
Mariah

Quote from: bellesparkles on August 26, 2026, 10:24:33 PMThis is so amazing! Thank you for sharing this, it is of a "faith in humanity restored" quality.

Honestly, this is how every single doctor, no every single PERSON, should be reacting to the news that someone is finally discovering themselves and getting the courage to live their best life.

You can be very proud of yourself. Well done!