Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: bellesparkles on July 21, 2026, 06:46:13 PM Return to Full Version
Title: Transwomen: what item(s) do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: bellesparkles on July 21, 2026, 06:46:13 PM
Post by: bellesparkles on July 21, 2026, 06:46:13 PM
My wife (43) is a very recent transwoman. I want to give her a little "congrats on being a girl!" giftbox with some cute, funny, and useful stuff to start her journey into woman-hood.
There are of course things she's already mentioned to have an interest in, like skin care, make up, and hair removal. I will include some of that in the giftbox.
But I also wonder... transwomen of the internet: what item(s) would you have liked to have starting out? Or maybe would still like to have if you were given such a giftbox?
Do you have any other relevant ideas to include?
Thank you in advance!
Edit: changed the title to include the word "item(s)" because I think my question was a bit too general before oops
There are of course things she's already mentioned to have an interest in, like skin care, make up, and hair removal. I will include some of that in the giftbox.
But I also wonder... transwomen of the internet: what item(s) would you have liked to have starting out? Or maybe would still like to have if you were given such a giftbox?
Do you have any other relevant ideas to include?
Thank you in advance!
Edit: changed the title to include the word "item(s)" because I think my question was a bit too general before oops
Title: Re: Transwomen: what do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: Finally Anna on July 21, 2026, 06:52:52 PM
Post by: Finally Anna on July 21, 2026, 06:52:52 PM
A blouse? A makeup class? Nail salon? Understanding? Caring?
The absolute best is a spouse that accepts and possibly even welcomes the change, and that makes the newly out transwoman feel understood and appreciated. So, the exact content of the "congrats" is perhpas not what matter most, as long as the message is clear.
The absolute best is a spouse that accepts and possibly even welcomes the change, and that makes the newly out transwoman feel understood and appreciated. So, the exact content of the "congrats" is perhpas not what matter most, as long as the message is clear.
Title: Re: Transwomen: what do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: Laura Squirrel on July 21, 2026, 06:54:56 PM
Post by: Laura Squirrel on July 21, 2026, 06:54:56 PM
Truthfully, I wish I could've come out when I was 19 like I wanted. I would suggest a medium-sized black purse.
Title: Re: Transwomen: what do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: bellesparkles on July 21, 2026, 07:04:09 PM
Post by: bellesparkles on July 21, 2026, 07:04:09 PM
Quote from: Finally Anna on July 21, 2026, 06:52:52 PMThe absolute best is a spouse that accepts and possibly even welcomes the change, and that makes the newly out transwoman feel understood and appreciated.
Thankfully she often remarks that she would never have even considered transitioning if it wasn't for my motivational support, so I do hope I'm already supplying that for her. Of course I don't know if I can ever truly make her feel understood because I'm cis myself, but I do tell her I appreciate her a lot and hope this giftbox will make that appreciation a bit more tangible :)
Title: Re: Transwomen: what do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: Laura Squirrel on July 21, 2026, 07:06:53 PM
Post by: Laura Squirrel on July 21, 2026, 07:06:53 PM
Quote from: bellesparkles on July 21, 2026, 07:04:09 PMThankfully she often remarks that she would never have even considered transitioning if it wasn't for my motivational support, so I do hope I'm already supplying that for her. Of course I don't know if I can ever truly make her feel understood because I'm cis myself, but I do tell her I appreciate her a lot and hope this giftbox will make that appreciation a bit more tangible :)
Oh, I'm sure that she will love it. You may get some waterworks going, though. So, have a box of Kleenex nearby.
Title: Re: Transwomen: what do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: tammy753 on July 21, 2026, 07:25:43 PM
Post by: tammy753 on July 21, 2026, 07:25:43 PM
A supporting family. My story is posted here several times but that is the one thing I wish I had. Well I also wish I had been braver and came out in the 90's.
Title: Re: Transwomen: what do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: Laura Squirrel on July 21, 2026, 07:39:26 PM
Post by: Laura Squirrel on July 21, 2026, 07:39:26 PM
Quote from: tammy753 on July 21, 2026, 07:25:43 PMA supporting family. My story is posted here several times but that is the one thing I wish I had. Well I also wish I had been braver and came out in the 90's.
You and me both.
Title: Re: Transwomen: what do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: Lori Dee on July 21, 2026, 08:28:02 PM
Post by: Lori Dee on July 21, 2026, 08:28:02 PM
Hello Belle,
I'm Lori Dee. Welcome to Susan's Place!
I see that this is your first post, so allow me to offer our standard Welcome Package. No matter who you are, you are always welcome at Susan's Place.
We want to get to know you. Please stop by our Introductions Forum (https://www.susans.org/index.php?board=8.0) and introduce yourself.
I think jewelry would make a nice gift. It doesn't need to be expensive or fancy, just something from the heart that she can cherish for years to come.
As a Significant Other, you may be interested in our Significant Others Forum. It is a special place set aside for spouses, family, friends, and allies to share their experiences as they support their loved one in their journey. You can find that forum here:
https://www.susans.org/index.php?board=26.0
You are certainly welcome to browse the forums and continue to ask questions or share your comments and experiences too. We all learn from each other.
When you click on the HOME button, you will see a page listing all of the various sub-forums by category and topic. Each sub-forum has a description of what that forum is about, as well as any guidelines for posting.
Please keep in mind when posting that this is an ALL-AGES PUBLIC Forum and the internet never forgets. Do not post anything that you do not want to be made public.
I will add links below that are important for new and returning members.
Pay special attention to the links in RED.
If you have any questions about the Susan's Place site and the Forums, please feel free to contact me at LoriDee605@outlook.com.
Once again, welcome to Susan's Place!
~ Lori Dee
Forum Staff
Things that you should read
@bellesparkles
@Sarah B
@Charlotte Kitty
@Northern Star Girl
I'm Lori Dee. Welcome to Susan's Place!
I see that this is your first post, so allow me to offer our standard Welcome Package. No matter who you are, you are always welcome at Susan's Place.
We want to get to know you. Please stop by our Introductions Forum (https://www.susans.org/index.php?board=8.0) and introduce yourself.
I think jewelry would make a nice gift. It doesn't need to be expensive or fancy, just something from the heart that she can cherish for years to come.
As a Significant Other, you may be interested in our Significant Others Forum. It is a special place set aside for spouses, family, friends, and allies to share their experiences as they support their loved one in their journey. You can find that forum here:
https://www.susans.org/index.php?board=26.0
You are certainly welcome to browse the forums and continue to ask questions or share your comments and experiences too. We all learn from each other.
When you click on the HOME button, you will see a page listing all of the various sub-forums by category and topic. Each sub-forum has a description of what that forum is about, as well as any guidelines for posting.
Please keep in mind when posting that this is an ALL-AGES PUBLIC Forum and the internet never forgets. Do not post anything that you do not want to be made public.
I will add links below that are important for new and returning members.
Pay special attention to the links in RED.
If you have any questions about the Susan's Place site and the Forums, please feel free to contact me at LoriDee605@outlook.com.
Once again, welcome to Susan's Place!
~ Lori Dee
Forum Staff
Things that you should read
- New Members... Please Read this First (https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,250343.msg2295001.html#msg2295001)
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Title: Re: Transwomen: what do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: KristaFairchild on July 21, 2026, 08:31:09 PM
Post by: KristaFairchild on July 21, 2026, 08:31:09 PM
Quote from: Finally Anna on July 21, 2026, 06:52:52 PMA blouse? A makeup class? Nail salon? Understanding? Caring?Yes! What she said! 😃
The absolute best is a spouse that accepts and possibly even welcomes the change, and that makes the newly out transwoman feel understood and appreciated. So, the exact content of the "congrats" is perhpas not what matter most, as long as the message is clear.
Title: Re: Transwomen: what do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: ChrissyRyan on July 21, 2026, 09:02:12 PM
Post by: ChrissyRyan on July 21, 2026, 09:02:12 PM
Welcome Belle!
Chrissy
Chrissy
Title: Re: Transwomen: what do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: NicoleBamdad on July 21, 2026, 09:48:06 PM
Post by: NicoleBamdad on July 21, 2026, 09:48:06 PM
hi i am nicole i am 1 month post op the thing i wish i started life with was being a girl as a guy i always did dtuff girls do i identify as a girl early in life but did nothing about it until recently i went through my transtion then 1 month ago had my sexual reassigment surgery as a kid i felt more like a girl than a guy so now as a girl i feel complete
Title: Re: Transwomen: what item(s) do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: Courtney G on July 21, 2026, 09:58:41 PM
Post by: Courtney G on July 21, 2026, 09:58:41 PM
For me, the most affirming things are the simple, personal items that cis women take for granted and/or that I might have dreamed about but felt guilty over, such as underwear (bras and panties).
Also:
A female razor, for legs, underarms, etc.
Foundation or blurring primer - makeup basics
Sleepwear!
Camis/tank tops
Cute socks
Deodorant or perfume
Maybe a magazine intended for women
Colorful things, like a lavender or yellow water bottle. Men aren't supposed to have colorful things, even if they like them. Women (such as your spouse) are allowed to.
Basically, anything that's considered female-coded and off-limits to men.
Also:
A female razor, for legs, underarms, etc.
Foundation or blurring primer - makeup basics
Sleepwear!
Camis/tank tops
Cute socks
Deodorant or perfume
Maybe a magazine intended for women
Colorful things, like a lavender or yellow water bottle. Men aren't supposed to have colorful things, even if they like them. Women (such as your spouse) are allowed to.
Basically, anything that's considered female-coded and off-limits to men.
Title: Re: Transwomen: what do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: CosmicJoke on July 21, 2026, 10:07:53 PM
Post by: CosmicJoke on July 21, 2026, 10:07:53 PM
Quote from: bellesparkles on July 21, 2026, 06:46:13 PMMy wife (43) is a very recent transwoman. I want to give her a little "congrats on being a girl!" giftbox with some cute, funny, and useful stuff to start her journey into woman-hood.
There are of course things she's already mentioned to have an interest in, like skin care, make up, and hair removal. I will include some of that in the giftbox.
But I also wonder... transwomen of the internet: what item(s) would you have liked to have starting out? Or maybe would still like to have if you were given such a giftbox?
Do you have any other relevant ideas to include?
Thank you in advance!
Edit: changed the title to include the word "item(s)" because I think my question was a bit too general before oops
Any kind of perfume or fragrance is nice. Shower gels and body wash are good too. Dove and Olay make some really good ones.
Title: Re: Transwomen: what item(s) do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: Petunia on July 21, 2026, 10:17:29 PM
Post by: Petunia on July 21, 2026, 10:17:29 PM
Quote from: bellesparkles on July 21, 2026, 07:04:09 PMThankfully she often remarks that she would never have even considered transitioning if it wasn't for my motivational support, so I do hope I'm already supplying that for her. Of course I don't know if I can ever truly make her feel understood because I'm cis myself, but I do tell her I appreciate her a lot and hope this giftbox will make that appreciation a bit more tangible :)
The above would have been enough for me.
But a nice piece of jewelry, a trip to the nail salon and doing makeup together would have been much appreciated
Title: Re: Transwomen: what item(s) do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: Charlotte Kitty on July 22, 2026, 01:37:33 AM
Post by: Charlotte Kitty on July 22, 2026, 01:37:33 AM
Nice body washes and moisturisers. The good ones!
Title: Re: Transwomen: what item(s) do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: Finally Anna on July 22, 2026, 04:25:14 AM
Post by: Finally Anna on July 22, 2026, 04:25:14 AM
Quote from: bellesparkles on July 21, 2026, 07:04:09 PMOf course I don't know if I can ever truly make her feel understood because I'm cis myself, but I do tell her I appreciate her a lot and hope this giftbox will make that appreciation a bit more tangible :)I think you provide world-class understanding!
Encouraging transition and providing comfort, care and tokens like the gift box, is probably the most supportive and loving thing a newly out transwoman can get.
Just continue like you do. I can assure you that it is very appreciated.
💕
Title: Re: Transwomen: what item(s) do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: NancyDrew1930 on July 22, 2026, 05:07:05 AM
Post by: NancyDrew1930 on July 22, 2026, 05:07:05 AM
It's very nice that she has a supportive spouse.
I would recommend some black pantyhose or a nude hose to go with her skirts.
Also, maybe suggest that she get her ears pierced so that she can wear some cute earrings and necklace combos.
I would recommend some black pantyhose or a nude hose to go with her skirts.
Also, maybe suggest that she get her ears pierced so that she can wear some cute earrings and necklace combos.
Title: Re: Transwomen: what item(s) do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: Anne_lifetrip on July 22, 2026, 05:30:51 AM
Post by: Anne_lifetrip on July 22, 2026, 05:30:51 AM
Quote from: bellesparkles on July 21, 2026, 07:04:09 PMThankfully she often remarks that she would never have even considered transitioning if it wasn't for my motivational support, so I do hope I'm already supplying that for her.
I agree that your greatest gift for her is this. Knowing she has you there is of great value.
Adding to that, maybe, a dinner out or a girls out with her.
I mean, the whole package...hair, makeup, dress up and go out someplace both of you like and that can do together, where she can enjoy life as herself with you on her side. Check that it is a friendly place and go for it.
Those first memories being happy being herself are forever.
And congratulations for being such a wonderful woman.
Title: Re: Transwomen: what item(s) do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: bellesparkles on July 22, 2026, 05:51:56 AM
Post by: bellesparkles on July 22, 2026, 05:51:56 AM
These are some amazing ideas, thank you girls!
I also really like the additional idea of taking her out for a girl's night and going for the works by getting our hair and nails done etc. I will definitely put some work into finding out safe places to do this <3
I also really like the additional idea of taking her out for a girl's night and going for the works by getting our hair and nails done etc. I will definitely put some work into finding out safe places to do this <3
Title: Re: Transwomen: what item(s) do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: Liz K on July 22, 2026, 06:06:59 AM
Post by: Liz K on July 22, 2026, 06:06:59 AM
I know I'll be a bundle of nerves after my surgery. After the initial recovery, I'd want a spa day where I can be pampered and relax for hours. Massage, facial, sauna, beauty treatments, decadent food and beverages, etc. It's a bit spendy but so worth it!
Title: Re: Transwomen: what item(s) do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: ChrissyRyan on July 22, 2026, 06:23:25 AM
Post by: ChrissyRyan on July 22, 2026, 06:23:25 AM
Support from others is good to always have.
Title: Re: Transwomen: what item(s) do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: Petunia on July 22, 2026, 05:51:51 PM
Post by: Petunia on July 22, 2026, 05:51:51 PM
Quote from: NancyDrew1930 on Yesterday at 05:07:05 AMIt's very nice that she has a supportive spouse.
I would recommend some black pantyhose or a nude hose to go with her skirts.
Also, maybe suggest that she get her ears pierced so that she can wear some cute earrings and necklace combos.
I didn't even think about ear piercing and earrings, probably because it is so much a part of me now.
If she doesn't already have her ears pierced take her out for a suprise trip.
Title: Re: Transwomen: what item(s) do you wish you had starting out?
Post by: Sarah B on July 22, 2026, 06:24:18 PM
Post by: Sarah B on July 22, 2026, 06:24:18 PM
Hi Belle
My name is Sarah and I would also like to formally, Welcome you to Susan's Place!
I see that other members of Susan's have also welcomed you as well.
Belle, your wife is fortunate to have someone who is putting so much love, thought and care into supporting her.
I still believe that your acceptance, encouragement and willingness to share these experiences with her are the greatest gifts you can give. The gift box will make that love tangible, while a girls' day or evening together could create beautiful memories that she will treasure for years.
There has been so much wisdom in the replies here. The suggestions of jewellery, perfume, a purse, lovely body products, makeup, earrings and other affirming everyday items are wonderful. I especially love the idea of getting your hair and nails done together before going somewhere safe and welcoming. As several posters have wisely said, it is not only the items themselves that matter. It is the message behind them: "I see you, I accept you and I am happy to be beside you."
Please let us know how it goes. I suspect Laura may be right about keeping the tissues nearby!
Once you feel comfortable here, it would be appreciated if you add a little bit more about yourself in the other forums and threads. I would appreciate it very much as, I'm always interested in learning something new about new members.
In addition members of Susan's will more than likely discuss problems or issues that are similar to yours as most have experienced these issues as well.
Please keep in mind when posting that this is an ALL AGES PUBLIC Forum and the internet never forgets. Do not post anything that you do not want to be made public.
Take care and all the best for the future.
Once again, Welcome to Susan's Place!
Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Devlyn @Jessica_Rose @Mariah @Northern Star Girl @Lori Dee @Charlotte Kitty
@bellesparkles
My name is Sarah and I would also like to formally, Welcome you to Susan's Place!
I see that other members of Susan's have also welcomed you as well.
Belle, your wife is fortunate to have someone who is putting so much love, thought and care into supporting her.
I still believe that your acceptance, encouragement and willingness to share these experiences with her are the greatest gifts you can give. The gift box will make that love tangible, while a girls' day or evening together could create beautiful memories that she will treasure for years.
There has been so much wisdom in the replies here. The suggestions of jewellery, perfume, a purse, lovely body products, makeup, earrings and other affirming everyday items are wonderful. I especially love the idea of getting your hair and nails done together before going somewhere safe and welcoming. As several posters have wisely said, it is not only the items themselves that matter. It is the message behind them: "I see you, I accept you and I am happy to be beside you."
Please let us know how it goes. I suspect Laura may be right about keeping the tissues nearby!
Once you feel comfortable here, it would be appreciated if you add a little bit more about yourself in the other forums and threads. I would appreciate it very much as, I'm always interested in learning something new about new members.
In addition members of Susan's will more than likely discuss problems or issues that are similar to yours as most have experienced these issues as well.
Please keep in mind when posting that this is an ALL AGES PUBLIC Forum and the internet never forgets. Do not post anything that you do not want to be made public.
Take care and all the best for the future.
Once again, Welcome to Susan's Place!
Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Devlyn @Jessica_Rose @Mariah @Northern Star Girl @Lori Dee @Charlotte Kitty
@bellesparkles