Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I hope I wont offend anyone since it might sound allittle stupid.

I got 2 mtf friends, both really want period, getting pregnant and having kids,
pretty much all uposite of me,
I start to wonder if all or almost all mtf got these fellings???? since it not the first time it got mention.
or if there someone who actually dont want these things.
most cis-ender women dont like period, and some dont want children or having them biologically.

also I wonder how much the matter of "being a women" has anything say.
I heard people saying.. that people dont see them as being women because they cant give birth.
dose this has anything to say or is your wish(if you wish so) simple to get children?

please be honest..
thank you....

They want periods? o.O

I would love to be able to bear a child, but I'm okay with sperm banking, although sometimes I get really frustrated because I won't ever be able to bear a child myself. I definitely want kids.

I have 3 boys and 2 girls of my own. In each pregnancy I was soooooooo happy for the mother, but sooooooooooooooooo sad for me.

Every time I saw my pregnant wife or any pregnant woman I felt a pain in my abdomen, like a I had a hole on it. In numerous occasions I had to fight some tears off.

As I got oldear the pain subsided, and today I no longer yearn to be pregnant.

Kate D

I'm not sure if I'd ever want kids or not, but I definitely want the option of birthing my own kids should I ever decide I'd want them. Not going to get that option in this life obviously (even if medical science figures out a way it will be insanely expensive for decades after), but that doesn't make me want it any less.

Quote from: Natkat on July 18, 2011, 08:52:56 PM
that people dont see them as being women because they cant give birth.

I have also heard this, but it is a flawed argument. There are ciswomen out there who cannot give birth but they are still women. I've actually heard of cases where such women feel/are made to feel less of a woman for this too, which is just as sick. It indicates to the deeper fallacy that a person is just a pile of flesh. The ability to give birth does not come from being a woman, it comes from living in a body with the requisite anatomical tools and them functioning properly. Some women can't give birth, some men can. Sure it's more complicated than we would prefer, but that's life.

I was in a relationship for a number of years with someone who had a kid by a previous relationship.  While I adored the kid and had her in my life through high school graduation, I have no desire to birth one of my own, nor am I really looking to get into another relationship with a child involved.  Hell, I am in my mid-40's...if someone in my age bracket has a kid and we are getting into a relationship, they better be close to graduation as we speak ;)

If I were 30 years younger I'd def. be barefoot and prego in the kitchen  :icon_chick:  But unfortunately, I'm too old now   :icon_cry:

After going through morning sickness, I can say no way in hell. Besides, I've had three kids already. I was also there for their births. No thank you.

I would definitely would like to experience a life growing inside of my body and giving birth. There has to be no other feelings that are as great as giving birth and holding the newborn for the very first time.

I have three boys and a daughter.  I was there through my exes pregnancies.  The morning sicknesses, weight gain, back aches and everything.  It was as if I was pregnant.  If I was younger, much younger, I would like to go through everything myself.

But now I am a grandmother of 11, and maybe soon a great grandmother. (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsmileys.on-my-web.com%2Frepository%2FAnimals%2Fferret-9.gif&hash=42bd2ee88d4ddc91007b3b25799f543e9ee358f1)   My oldest grandson is engaged.  (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsmileys.on-my-web.com%2Frepository%2FAnimals%2Fferret-7.gif&hash=9f27f1603b9ef76a5d4bbeedcd1615f680c36e8b)

*Every time I saw my pregnant wife or any pregnant woman I felt a pain in my abdomen, like a I had a hole in it. At numerous occasions I had to fight some tears off.*

Just as Kate said. It is/was one of the major things I had and still have to work through. It gave we GID-fits no end. Actually hard to describe how you can get stomach cramps while bawling your eyes out! Really heavy.

Yes, the rational is: Of course I AM TOO OLD NOW.
But my inner feelings are not concerned about my age, they ARE not rational, they don't give a hoot.
It may have to do with our second puberty we all go through, and with time we grow up and the baby-wish becomes less dominant. So some of the respondents seem a lot more grown-up about this then I am.

If I see a lovely mummy-tummy it still cuts me, I wish it was me, and the knowing to be barren is hurtful and brings up a sense of inadequacy and uselessness.
All biological pain, as Kate said it so right: ...like having a hole in the stomach.

I can feel for all these GGs that for some reason or other can not bear babies and so desperately would like to. I think is just written in our genes.

Also, we (females) are the "source of life" after all. Mother Nature will call on you if you are... even if MtF! YMMV

Axelle

I always wanted to. I was a sterile male as I had been castrated when raped. So I could not impregnate my wife, and when we were young it was very early days for IVF etc.
But I have always wanted to carry my children. But I'm way too old.

So just dust off and keep on jiving
Cindy

the poll doesn't provide adequately for caveats.

I am too old and have to many other priorities even if it were biologically possible.

so i can't say yes to either pregnancy or wanting more kids.

But if I were 25 again, and physically equipped to do so - yes, i'd love to.


More to the point - if I had a magic wish and could wish either to be an attractive fully passable female as a result of having had all my work done, or i could be a natal female with periods and all the other "negatives" one might name, the choice would be easy. My wife thinks it's an insane thing to say, but if i could have anything I wanted, it would have been the life of a woman born physically female, with all that comes with that good and bad.

What she said

Quote from: Natkat on July 18, 2011, 08:52:56 PM
both really want period

Why???!!!!  bio girls hate that

Quote from: ~RoadToTrista~ on July 18, 2011, 08:58:29 PM
I'm okay with sperm banking

You are lesbian? bi?

Proof?

Quote from: Narela on July 19, 2011, 06:18:19 AM
Why???!!!!  bio girls hate that

i'm not too sure about that. they are all fine talking and complaining about it even in public some times. whereas i who am bio female but don't feel like it at all any more pretend it doesn't even happen to me, and isn't that much closer to hating it?

i mean, "all" people complain a bit about things they don't like about their friends, spouse etc, but if they really hated them they wouldn't even mention their name


i often find myself in the opposite position of that of many ftm. when i see a pregnant woman i wish i had a wife who'd bear my child. probably won't ever happen, but i like the idea

pinkfluff; of corse it a lame agument, and I agree 100% with you.
--
I used to be very ill during my period, it probebly been a mix of deep depression and much pain,
and I always had to stay home for days, and take pills, when I wasnt on T. (on T I actually felt less pain)

now my pain always always been very bad, but I still cant understand people wanting to be in a pain for 1 week every mounth for years not even cis-gender women who are used to it, and who want children...
I once saw in tv some girls talking about there first period and one said she felt like a women now when she got it, so it didnt really seam unhappy..
---
btw, seam as many actually do wanted kids but feel too old, im sorry for not thinking about that while making the poll.

Quote from: Axélle on July 19, 2011, 01:16:11 AM
I can feel for all these GGs that for some reason or other can not bear babies and so desperately would like to. I think is just written in our genes.

Also, we (females) are the "source of life" after all. Mother Nature will call on you if you are... even if MtF! YMMV

not a true statement...there are LOTS of women who never had a maternal instinct.  Some of them are even heterosexual in orientation...

Quote from: Natkat on July 19, 2011, 07:34:10 AM
now my pain always always been very bad, but I still cant understand people wanting to be in a pain for 1 week every mounth for years not even cis-gender women who are used to it, and who want children...

not all women experience pain. i never had any pain before having my daughter. after that i have bad cramps every time for about 3-4 hours on the second day. i don't mind the pain or the bleeding. what i don't like about it is the annoying fluctuation in hormone levels, and that i feel like it should just stop because i've already been enough woman for an entire lifetime

Quote from: Natkat on July 19, 2011, 07:34:10 AM
I once saw in tv some girls talking about there first period and one said she felt like a women now when she got it, so it didnt really seam unhappy..

i've heard some of that too. weird, i just registered that i got it and dealt with it as any other necessary chore. i wouldn't even have told anyone if i didn't need certain hygiene products

Of course I would like  to be pregnant and have a child, I think that most women trans or not would want to. I will say though, that since not all cisgendered women want to get pregnant and have a child, I doubt all MTFs would either.

Honestly, if it were possible to have all the correct organs I certainly would want them; in my view all of that goes along with being a woman. Though, I am comforted a bit by the fact that not all cisgendered women get periods or are fertile either and some (such as women with CAIS) have XY chromosomes too, so when I think on it what an MTF can be is within the range that some non trans women are, and that makes me feel better about things.

Quote from: Narela on July 19, 2011, 06:18:19 AM
You are lesbian? bi?

Nope.

Being ftm, I don't want to get pg myself, but would like to raise a child with a spouse some day.  I hate my periods, they only create problems every month, pain and a discharge to absorb.  I know of no woman how likes getting a period, maybe there are a few that do.

Quote from: Taka on July 19, 2011, 09:42:25 AM
not all women experience pain. i never had any pain before having my daughter. after that i have bad cramps every time for about 3-4 hours on the second day. i don't mind the pain or the bleeding. what i don't like about it is the annoying fluctuation in hormone levels, and that i feel like it should just stop because i've already been enough woman for an entire lifetimei've heard some of that too. weird, i just registered that i got it and dealt with it as any other necessary chore. i wouldn't even have told anyone if i didn't need certain hygiene products

Interesting, I always though everyone must had been in someway or another pain, like headach or stomack cramps, now I feel like investigating the whole period mystery..

when I got perioed my stomack looked bigger as well as my legs when I got period.
I got pain 2 weeks before 2 weeks after in my stomack, extremly pain 1-2 day in the stomack together with diarry, including, pain in my back and genetalia.., (depression but I think it mainly because I hate period and feel like the only guy to deal with it..)
I usunally had to eat 4-6 pills the first day and 2-4 the second.. to keep the pain down,

is that normal???
p.s.
after starting T I survived with 0-2 pills first day and 0-2 pills the second day. (so far)

The fact that I will never be able to give birth to my own children is one of the more difficult thing I have to come to terms with. If I was given the choice of being able to get pregnant but I would have to have periods I would jump at the chance but not to have periods just to be more of a woman. Like others have said I would have rather been born female taking the good with the bad because I am female.

Several people have suggested adoption but I don't want to start at my age and place in my life. My brotherand sisters have had plenty of kids to make up for me never having any.

Natkat,
my ex-gf was throwing up, having cramps, all the pains you describe, etc. She seemed often like a druggie going cold-turkey. (it's what some doctors thought)

Though I often got the feeling she liked to punish herself - she would never go see an endo for example, simply refused. It really sucks to watch all this period happenings and getting the idea as if it all NEEDS to suffered. Her not me.

When she finally got her hormones sorted out, the spook was over in a short while. Only that this lasted for so many years!
Never could shake the though that she hated herself as being a female (lots of other indications) - and there were reasons for that from her early youth...

The body and mind are a lot closer linked than what many will not want to know.

For this reason TGs may get this "hole in the tummy" feeling (me), and buckle with tear-cramps when GID has a bad go at you (me).
Hey, it's all in the mind... now just look what your body is doing!

Food for thought...
Axelle

Natkat, being pre t I still get them.  After my first 2 or 3, I have gotten cramps for about 24 hrs before I start leaking and then for about 12 hrs more.  I do feel the effects of hormones changes during the month with swelling, etc.  Getting on t will be so nice.

Quote from: mm on July 19, 2011, 12:52:05 PM
Natkat, being pre t I still get them.  After my first 2 or 3, I have gotten cramps for about 24 hrs before I start leaking and then for about 12 hrs more.  I do feel the effects of hormones changes during the month with swelling, etc.  Getting on t will be so nice.

Im sure it will.
for me T diffently made a diffrence, I still got many of the clear symtompes last time i got it.
(havent been on T for so long yet) but the pain is not that big and I dont need to drown myself in pills like I did before.

sounds nice, how long on T?

@mm: i can agree that no women really like getting a period. but they still seem to be ok with it and wouldn't usually want to take drastic measures like hysterectomy or t to get rid of it..

@natkat: extreme pms often means there's something wrong with your hormones, so even a woman who suffers a lot, be it pain, bloating, depression or w/e because of her period should get her hormones checked

taka; I sometimes wounder if I been born with too much estrogene in my body, do you think it could be a reaon?
---
mm; 2 or 3 mounts, I dont have calender with me so I cant see exectly, but I already felt a diffrent by the first period after T.

Quote from: Natkat on July 19, 2011, 04:58:07 PM
taka; I sometimes wounder if I been born with too much estrogene in my body, do you think it could be a reaon?

sorry, i'm not a doctor. but looking around on the net, it seems that too low progesterone (which would make estrogen dominant) could cause symptoms like those that you describe

Quote from: Taka on July 19, 2011, 05:15:54 PM
sorry, i'm not a doctor. but looking around on the net, it seems that too low progesterone (which would make estrogen dominant) could cause symptoms like those that you describe

I just hope it wont make me extremly fertile, since I cant get castrated before the age of 25..

I would definitely love to be a mother... I know kids can be a pain in the rear sometimes, but the emotional rewards of pregnancy and motherhood are too great.  Definitely yes.

At age 74 and with 8 kids and 15 grandkids between us, it is a moot point. My husband bore his 4.

However, the doctor told me today that the abdominal pain I have been suffering the past few days is about the same as labor pain. What goes around comes around.

Robyn,
who wants this pain to stop

Quote from: Natkat on July 19, 2011, 06:30:38 PM
I just hope it wont make me extremly fertile, since I cant get castrated before the age of 25..

you're on t aren't you? should make you infertile after a while

I would really would like to experience everything a biological woman experiences.

* you're on t aren't you? should make you infertile after a while *

NOT REALLY! And don't make any mistake not looking after birth-control (if applicable). You not be the first FtM to fall pregnant to that expectation.

E on the other hand seems *the* BC for a male body, yet I'd not take a chance on it either.

Axelle

I think I should talk to my doctor about it,
I know T will lover the risk but it probably not going to take it away complitely..
I dont know if there anything more than lube and comdoms I can use,
many females use pills, or prevetation who got homones, but I dont think it would be good for me when im on T,
I dont these homones in my body not more than I already have.
--

Quote from: Natkat on July 20, 2011, 09:58:40 AM
many females use pills, or prevetation who got homones, but I dont think it would be good for me when im on T,
I dont these homones in my body not more than I already have.

don't think it would be a good idea to take more hormones than you need

and as axellé pointed out, no hormone based prevention methods are completely safe, be it t or products designed for women. i know two women who got pregnant despite hormone pills/injections

I always heard P-pills + comdoms where more or less or almost 100% safe if you did it right, and even if something went wrong it so easy because there tons of information how women best protect themself, while with transguys it more complicated and I had to look around to even find something about it.. -__-.
well I really dont want homons in my body, so I try avoiding all these things as much as posible and if people ask me about it I say I just cant take them because of my medicin(T)...

p.s. sorry getting alittle out of topic.

Quote from: Natkat on July 18, 2011, 08:52:56 PM
I hope I wont offend anyone since it might sound allittle stupid.

I got 2 mtf friends, both really want period, getting pregnant and having kids,
pretty much all uposite of me,
I start to wonder if all or almost all mtf got these fellings???? since it not the first time it got mention.
or if there someone who actually dont want these things.
most cis-ender women dont like period, and some dont want children or having them biologically.

also I wonder how much the matter of "being a women" has anything say.
I heard people saying.. that people dont see them as being women because they cant give birth.
dose this has anything to say or is your wish(if you wish so) simple to get children?

please be honest..
thank you....

i feel the same as your 2 friends

Every time I start feeling maternal: I see some kid screaming at their guardian. And then all of those maternal feelings I'd been brooding over? Gone. Utterly gone :)

Not to mention I'd make a horrible mother... at best I'd be the most fun godmother ever (I wouldn't mind that too much, tbh).

Every second 2 people die and 5 people are born.

Do we really need more children in this world?

Quote from: xxJuliaxx on August 10, 2011, 09:30:03 PM
Every second 2 people die and 5 people are born.

Do we really need more children in this world?

trust me if that were true we would be a lot more than 6 billion especially after all these unneeded wars in this world  :) so yea we need babies  :)

Quote from: xxJuliaxx on August 10, 2011, 09:30:03 PM
Every second 2 people die and 5 people are born.

Do we really need more children in this world?

Let me ask you this, of those 5 how many will eventually die?

  I would like to have children, but I'm too late.  I'm old, too old.
  Joelene.

Quote from: LilKittyCatZoey on August 11, 2011, 03:44:23 PM
trust me if that were true we would be a lot more than 6 billion especially after all these unneeded wars in this world  :) so yea we need babies  :)

I know *sigh* thats just something I tell myself to make myself feel better. I would like to have my own kids someday, but I guess giving some poor orphans a home is fine.

My whole life I've dreamed of being pregnant and having kids.  I love children with a passion.  Cried so much the day I found out I was infertile because of years of anorexia.  I guess if I'm not too old when/if I find someone to share my life with, we could always adopt.  It's a noble thing, anyway.

Sore subject for me :(.  I want babies :(.

On the opposite side of the spectrum. I don't agree that ftms don't want a women who'd bear their child. Actually, my gf and I were having a conversation about this, and if I were offered the ability to father a child, I'd take it.
I can't even say for certain that I want to be a father, but I'd still like the ability to impregnate my wife, regardless.
While invetro would be an option, it wouldn't quite be the same, y'know?

It wouldn't be. :( That still doesn't take away my desire for it.

Yes, I would want to be pregnant and have a child if that were possible.

Well, since starting HRT, I've gotten my own 'period' every month, minus the bleeding. Personally, after 6 months of it... Yea. I thought it was bad from the way it's been described to me by every female who's talked about it, But it's pretty uncomfortable. And I think your two friends need to rethink that wish. But, this is the price I pay and I'll live with it.

As for getting pregnant, I was pretty jealous of my wife when she was carrying our Son. But I'm content with the children we already have.

Quote from: Keaira on September 09, 2011, 05:13:10 AM
Well, since starting HRT, I've gotten my own 'period' every month, minus the bleeding. Personally, after 6 months of it... Yea. I thought it was bad from the way it's been described to me by every female who's talked about it, But it's pretty uncomfortable. And I think your two friends need to rethink that wish. But, this is the price I pay and I'll live with it.

As for getting pregnant, I was pretty jealous of my wife when she was carrying our Son. But I'm content with the children we already have.

by getting period do you mean like getting the same kind of pain?

Quote from: Natkat on September 09, 2011, 01:38:28 PM
by getting period do you mean like getting the same kind of pain?

Mood swings, cramps, PMS. Basically everything except the bleeding.

Oh joy, periods but no pregnancy.

Actually I have dreamed about being pregnant and everything that goes alone with it since I was little.

I would love to be pregnant. Hugs Shannon

This is actually what i want most. Even knowing how bad it can be, I've always been jealous of cisgirls because of their periods along with childbearing. My step mom actually had her period 24/7, and it was really unpleasant for her, but i couldn't help wanting to be able. I think that is part of why some of us qualify as having GID, instead of just gender dysphoria, we want even the parts a cisgirl would probably be rid of in a second if the could without consequence.

This is something I have dreamed about my whole life. Science will figure it out at some point. Saddly, by then I will be too old :'(

I yearn to experience pregnancy too.

I'm so obsessed with pregnancy and not being able to get pregnant that I want to be an OB nurse.

Never even thought of pregnancy. Wouldn't want to be even if I could. I don't do well with kids, whatsoever. I'm the first to admit it.

I've been asked in the past by mutual friends of my brother, who has three kids, if I would ever have them myself. My answer was a resounding no. No way, no how. And I would make a lousy parent, I'm pretty sure of that.

"Why's it doing that? Can't you, y'know, just put a cork in it or something?"

That's about the limit of my maternal instinct.

I would love to be an OB nurse midwife or doula

When I first started down this path I didn't care, if I wanted kids I could always adopt.  But recently I've been thinking that it would be nice for the possibility to exist...

God no. The possibility of getting pregnant (not mentioning bleeding every freaking month) is the last thing I would ever want. I already have seen too many co workers go through the full proccess and I don't ever want to think about it. To me it would feel like a parasite growing inside me, and I would gladly get sterilized as soon as possible. I already have enough now with acting like a b*tch a few days per month (even while not being "equipped").

Not being able to carry my own child is one of the most saddening things for me, every time i think about it i just want to cry for hours and hours...

Yes, I would love to get pregnant,be able to breast feed, and have periods as I would like being like every other woman in the world. As Mae West says: It maybe a man's world, just as long as I can be a woman in it"".

I would love to have a child and be a mother. As for the periods though, no way. I am definately enough of a bitch 3 weeks out of the month and one week on the rag may throw me over the top. ;)

As for children though, even as male, my T levels are to low and have always shot blanks. As for the whole pregnancy deal though, I would still love to be a mother but without the monthly monster preferrably.