Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Male to female transsexual talk (MTF) => Topic started by: Hideyoshi on April 15, 2013, 08:18:05 PM

Title: Ever since I went out for the first time as a girl...
Post by: Hideyoshi on April 15, 2013, 08:18:05 PM
It feels weird going in boy mode.  I need to wear a sports bra, undershirt, and one of my boyfriend's XXL t-shirts to make sure my boobs don't show.  I feel insecure walking around, feeling as if people are staring at me.  I know that's irrational, because people probably don't give a crap about some random person with long hair, but it took a while for that feeling to subside.  This was at the grocery store.

This feeling doesn't really happen at work, since my work clothes hide everything (including hair), and I get gendered male almost 100% of the time due to fairly masculine uniforms (drives me nuts but whatever), this just happens at public, non-work places.

That ball started rolling, I guess.  Tomorrow is 100% girl-mode time at therapist
Title: Re: Ever since I went out for the first time as a girl...
Post by: MaidofOrleans on April 15, 2013, 08:52:06 PM
The more and more changes I have on HRT and the longer my hair gets I just feel awkward presenting male.
Title: Re: Ever since I went out for the first time as a girl...
Post by: FrancisAnn on April 15, 2013, 09:58:41 PM
Just be yourself, be proud of yourself, you are becomming a nice girl & soon to become a woman.

Dress the way you feel & you will do just fine with your nesessary "therapist"

Have fun.
Title: Re: Ever since I went out for the first time as a girl...
Post by: Tristan on April 16, 2013, 06:21:00 AM
I agree that the further we get into transition the harder it is to do boy mode or even pass in it
Title: Re: Ever since I went out for the first time as a girl...
Post by: Ltl89 on April 16, 2013, 09:28:16 AM
Even though insecurity sucks, this is actually a good thing.  If you are concerned that people will see you as a girl when you are trying to present male, that really is a testament to how well you pass.  I mean, if people can only see you as a women, isn't that a great sign?   I imagine it can be awkward, but try to see everything as a closer step to your ultimate goal.
Title: Re: Ever since I went out for the first time as a girl...
Post by: RosieD on April 16, 2013, 04:27:49 PM
Quote from: FrancisAnn on April 15, 2013, 09:58:41 PM
Dress the way you feel & you will do just fine with your nesessary "therapist"

Oh cackling like a mad thing about the quotes around therapist. Mine seems to believe that referring to her patients as "her girls" is not at all strange in the slightest.

Rosie.
Title: Re: Ever since I went out for the first time as a girl...
Post by: luna on April 17, 2013, 07:24:36 PM
Quote from: MaidofOrleans on April 15, 2013, 08:52:06 PM
The more and more changes I have on HRT and the longer my hair gets I just feel awkward presenting male.

If that's you in the picture, I can't imagine you ever presenting as male. :)
Title: Re: Ever since I went out for the first time as a girl...
Post by: MaidofOrleans on April 17, 2013, 11:12:38 PM
Quote from: luna on April 17, 2013, 07:24:36 PM
If that's you in the picture, I can't imagine you ever presenting as male. :)

Yes that is me and yes I do pull it off.
Title: Re: Ever since I went out for the first time as a girl...
Post by: Rowan Rue on April 18, 2013, 02:41:00 AM
Last time I tried presenting as male was about two and a half month ago?  It felt really weird and I wouldn't even want to try now.  Fortunately being self employed has meant I didn't have to do the whole work as a boy thing.  That would have made me crazy.
Title: Re: Ever since I went out for the first time as a girl...
Post by: Rita on April 18, 2013, 09:25:37 AM
This is normal.  I feel the same way and is whats pushing me to FT girl mode.  My steps are light, ladylike but in boy mode I walk as if I have something to hide very heavily.
Title: Re: Ever since I went out for the first time as a girl...
Post by: Kathryn on April 18, 2013, 10:01:43 AM
Quote from: luna on April 17, 2013, 07:24:36 PM
If that's you in the picture, I can't imagine you ever presenting as male. :)

I thought the same thing Xp
Shes So Pretty!
Title: Re: Ever since I went out for the first time as a girl...
Post by: MaidofOrleans on April 18, 2013, 11:29:32 AM
Quote from: Kathryn on April 18, 2013, 10:01:43 AM
I thought the same thing Xp
Shes So Pretty!

Thanks.

For those curious, this is my guy mode.

Please don't quote

*image removed*
Title: Re: Ever since I went out for the first time as a girl...
Post by: ZoeM on April 18, 2013, 11:55:10 AM
Quote from: MaidofOrleans on April 18, 2013, 11:29:32 AM
Thanks.

For those curious, this is my guy mode.

Please don't quote
You look like a fourteen-year-old! I sorta want to ruffle your hair or something. :|
Title: Re: Ever since I went out for the first time as a girl...
Post by: Kathryn on April 18, 2013, 12:03:18 PM
^^ I was thinking the same thing.
Title: Re: Ever since I went out for the first time as a girl...
Post by: MaidofOrleans on April 18, 2013, 02:09:59 PM
Ya customers ask why I'm not in school...

...middle school  ::)
Title: Re: Ever since I went out for the first time as a girl...
Post by: Tristan on April 18, 2013, 02:12:00 PM
Quote from: MaidofOrleans on April 18, 2013, 02:09:59 PM
Ya customers ask why I'm not in school...

...middle school  ::)
Lol you do look awfully young