Literally everything makes me dysphoric, I hate that I couldn't just be born biologically male, I hate talking because of my voice I'm to damn short even some of the freshman that came in last year who are know sophmores have grown way taller than me I hate how short I am people don't even think I'm a Jr because of it they think Im like 12 years old I look like a pubescent boy know one wants to look like that, Exspecially considering I'm about to graduate soon, I don't sound like a male I don't have facial hair or a male body its so damn fustrating, Yet you guys keep saying a penis doesnt make you a male, I sound so dumb and stupid saying that, I get laughed at all the time because of it, And I also missed out on a boyhood that I'm never gonna get back, Whats the point of living if my own damn mom won't see me as male, Or even family, I can't even be friends with the guys because they look at me like a girl, Everyone looks at me like I'm crazy, I hate school and life period
Edited for profanity and improper language.
First off I do want to say congrats for putting yourself out there like that. Not everyone is able to do that but you had the courage to do so and that's commendable despite being mocked and laughed at. Whether you know it or not, you're part of the revolution. Within time, being trans will become more accepted and understood. Though some people are cruel, some people may have a change of heart about the subject of transition in the future when we become more prevelant and we are seen as human beings and not freaks. It may take a while but the change is on it's way as we get more media time.
As far as missing out on boyhood and the joys of being a cisgender male, I understand where you're coming from completely as I too feel horrible about it. It's normal to feel that way, but at the same time, it's one of those things we cannot change, so we shouldn't focus on that too much. If we spend all of our time focusing on that, we will never move foward.
The best thing for you to do is just do your best in school and have a plan, which according to your previous posts it seems you do. Your're trying to find a job and you have plans on going to college which is good. Try to focus on you're studies. Junior year is typically the hardest year in high school and trust me, every point counts, especially if you want to get into a university. I failed two of my classes my junior year and I had to pay for it my senior year (being in a basic algebra class with a bunch of 10th graders while taking a technical math class probability and statistics for seniors is not fun-being labeled officially as an 11th grader because of failing one class isn't fun either). This is the time where you really need to filter everything and everyone out and study so you can eventually go to college and get a good-paying job to aid in your transition. If you happen to get a job at the same time invest your time in both your studies and working then more power to you. Use that money to help you move out eventually or even pay for your T or top surgery.
I'm sorry I couldn't be of more help but the best thing to do is hang in there. Your situation is temporary.
Im already trying to work to pay for T, And its kinda hard not to focus on the boyhood and the becoming a man you will never have considering Im back in school and have to look at them enjoy themselves everyday
Quote from: Brandon on September 03, 2013, 04:32:41 PM
its kinda hard not to focus on the boyhood and the becoming a man you will never have considering Im back in school and have to look at them enjoy themselves everyday
I agree 100 percent. However you cannot let that consume your thinking, especially since you have about 360 days of school left before you graduate. It's a hard thing to accept, but you must realize that this is your journey and that is theirs. Somethings things happen and we have to deal with the cards we are given. Believe it or not, many cisgender children go through this with birth defects or illnessess. I'm sure some little children with type 1 diabetes is wondering why does he/she have to get their fingers pricked daily while most of the other kids don't have to. I'm sure some teenages who were born disabled and cannot walk are depressed and wonder why did it have to be THEM to be in a wheelchair while many of their other peers are walking and running. I really do understand where you're coming from, but the best thing to do is to work on what we
can achieve.
Well its not easy at all is gender dysphoria tha I have to experience gender everyday, Everytime I walk by a gu who's way taller than me I get dysphoric, Nothing is really helping it happens every school year
i'm in the same situation as you dude, and i know it really does suck. it's tough being short and scrawny especially in high school. the most we can do for now is just wait for hormones and try to make the best of a bad situation. it sounds impossible i know, but what i find helps is just surrounding myself with a good group of people. i live in a very tolerant place and it might be different for you, but my friends are all very accepting of my medical condition and never dwell on it. i go to a lot of after school clubs too, being in friendly environments manages to distract me from all the dysphoria. just know that this is the hardest part of transition. props to you for making it this far man.
Im not scrawny I work out Im just short, I have to wait 2 more years and go through another puberty which is embarrasing, No one understands me, I talk to alot people but I don't consider them friends Im just starting to give up all over again, No use, Yea Ill be able to transition sure but imma still get looked at funny
if you're not scrawny then that works out even better haha. and judging by your profile picture, once you start t you probably won't get looked at funny, in fact if i saw you in person now no matter what your height, i wouldn't think of you as anything but male. we're or own worst critics of ourselves, remember that. and the worst thing you could do is isolate yourself from everyone, because that just leaves you all alone with your dysphoria, it isn't a fun time.
Well yea I have no problem with passing, But i still will have to explain my situation to girls who might like me, I hate rejection, This is why I hav gave up on trying to get girls because I can never get one, But back to the topic, Yea if you seen m you wouldn't know but everyone at my school knows Im trans or just thinks im a lesbian, I wanna hang with guys and be friends with guys, But they see me as a girl they don't consider me a guy, The only reason I talk to alot of people is because I dress nice and people say I have swag, And because I like girls, But girls just look at me as gross even bisexual girls, I don't have what they want I guess yea sure Im a nice guy a gentlemen.
Probably not what you want to hear, but you're young. People really do mature as they get older, even just from year to year, or even in months. How people my age would react is completely different to how people in their twenties react, things are going to change for you as you get older. The reason that everyone here says that you don't need a penis to be a man is because it's true, but at your age it's still one of the big things that guys use to get one up on each other. How often do you hear older men talk about their penis size? It stops becoming the big deal that everyone makes it out to be in school. I'm short, I'm 5'1", I look fourteen at best, but I found out this weekend that I can pass as eighteen (older than I actually am) without too much questioning. More mature people just accept it. Hang around a different crowd, because it's immaturity that's getting you down.
And you don't need a girlfriend to be happy. Having a girlfriend for the sake of having one isn't going to make anyone feel good. Maybe that's just me, but I can't see the point in that.
Quote from: AlexanderC on September 03, 2013, 06:06:42 PM
Probably not what you want to hear, but you're young. People really do mature as they get older, even just from year to year, or even in months. How people my age would react is completely different to how people in their twenties react, things are going to change for you as you get older. The reason that everyone here says that you don't need a penis to be a man is because it's true, but at your age it's still one of the big things that guys use to get one up on each other. How often do you hear older men talk about their penis size? It stops becoming the big deal that everyone makes it out to be in school. I'm short, I'm 5'1", I look fourteen at best, but I found out this weekend that I can pass as eighteen (older than I actually am) without too much questioning. More mature people just accept it. Hang around a different crowd, because it's immaturity that's getting you down.
And you don't need a girlfriend to be happy. Having a girlfriend for the sake of having one isn't going to make anyone feel good. Maybe that's just me, but I can't see the point in that.
Well I want a gf know one wants to be alone, And Ive nver heard a cisgendered person say you dont need a penis to be aman
Quote from: Brandon on September 03, 2013, 06:22:11 PM
Well I want a gf know one wants to be alone, And Ive nver heard a cisgendered person say you dont need a penis to be aman
Well, most cisgender people don't know the difference between "sex" and "gender".
Quote from: Brandon on September 03, 2013, 05:30:52 PM
Well yea I have no problem with passing, But i still will have to explain my situation to girls who might like me, I hate rejection, This is why I hav gave up on trying to get girls because I can never get one, But back to the topic, Yea if you seen m you wouldn't know but everyone at my school knows Im trans or just thinks im a lesbian, I wanna hang with guys and be friends with guys, But they see me as a girl they don't consider me a guy, The only reason I talk to alot of people is because I dress nice and people say I have swag, And because I like girls, But girls just look at me as gross even bisexual girls, I don't have what they want I guess yea sure Im a nice guy a gentlemen.
you're just not looking at the right girls man, they pop up in unexpected places. does your school have a gay-straight alliance? even though the name says gay it's for all members of the lgbt community, and you might meet some girls you never really paid much attention to before. and i feel you on being friends with guys thing, i don't have many guy friends either and the ones i am friends with aren't typically masculine or into sports like i am so it's kind of a challenge haha
Quote from: Crookedjaw on September 03, 2013, 07:59:32 PM
you're just not looking at the right girls man, they pop up in unexpected places. does your school have a gay-straight alliance? even though the name says gay it's for all members of the lgbt community, and you might meet some girls you never really paid much attention to before. and i feel you on being friends with guys thing, i don't have many guy friends either and the ones i am friends with aren't typically masculine or into sports like i am so it's kind of a challenge haha
I don't like having to date a certain girl just because of my trans status, Besides I always fall for straight girls, That makes me more dysphoric when people tell me that I have to date her because she won't date you, And besides it could be the right girl who might not understand
Quote from: Brandon on September 03, 2013, 08:10:34 PM
I don't like having to date a certain girl just because of my trans status, Besides I always fall for straight girls, That makes me more dysphoric when people tell me that I have to date her because she won't date you, And besides it could be the right girl who might not understand
if she doesn't understand, she isn't the right girl. my girlfriend isn't straight but is primarily attracted to guys, and she doesn't see me as anything but a man. i've dated straight girls before who felt the same as my girlfriend does now. and then there are girls who won't date us because of our equipment, yeah it sucks but personally if a girl is gonna be that way, i don't think i'd be comfortable being with her. we have to compromise and it sucks but there's nothing else we can do. we have the right to be selective in who we date obviously, but since we're trans we can't really be picky.
Quote from: Crookedjaw on September 03, 2013, 08:16:11 PM
if she doesn't understand, she isn't the right girl. my girlfriend isn't straight but is primarily attracted to guys, and she doesn't see me as anything but a man. i've dated straight girls before who felt the same as my girlfriend does now. and then there are girls who won't date us because of our equipment, yeah it sucks but personally if a girl is gonna be that way, i don't think i'd be comfortable being with her. we have to compromise and it sucks but there's nothing else we can do. we have the right to be selective in who we date obviously, but since we're trans we can't really be picky.
Well I always fall for straight girls, And I can understand why a some girls would not date me I feel stupid Im calling myself a man yet I have a female body I guess it is kinda weird, And I can be picky if I want a straight girl than fine because some bisexuals don't understand me, I feel dumb as hell calling myself a man
Quote from: Crookedjaw on September 03, 2013, 08:16:11 PM
if she doesn't understand, she isn't the right girl. my girlfriend isn't straight but is primarily attracted to guys, and she doesn't see me as anything but a man. i've dated straight girls before who felt the same as my girlfriend does now. and then there are girls who won't date us because of our equipment, yeah it sucks but personally if a girl is gonna be that way, i don't think i'd be comfortable being with her. we have to compromise and it sucks but there's nothing else we can do. we have the right to be selective in who we date obviously, but since we're trans we can't really be picky.
Well I always fall for straight girls, And I can understand why a some girls would not date me I feel stupid Im calling myself a man yet I have a female body I guess it is kinda weird, And I can be picky if I want a straight girl than fine because some bisexuals don't understand me, I feel dumb as hell calling myself a man
Quote from: Brandon on September 03, 2013, 02:30:12 PM
Literally everything makes me dysphoric, I hate that I couldn't just be born biologically male, I hate talking because of my voice I'm to damn short even some of the freshman that came in last year who are know sophmores have grown way taller than me I hate how short I am people don't even think I'm a Jr because of it they think Im like 12 years old I look like a pubescent boy know one wants to look like that, Exspecially considering I'm about to graduate soon, I don't sound like a male I don't have facial hair or a male body its so damn fustrating, Yet you guys keep saying a penis doesnt make you a male, I sound so dumb and stupid saying that, I get laughed at all the time because of it, And I also missed out on a boyhood that I'm never gonna get back, Whats the point of living if my own damn mom won't see me as male, Or even family, I can't even be friends with the guys because they look at me like a girl, Everyone looks at me like I'm crazy, I hate school and life period
Edited for profanity and improper language.
Now I am not ftm I'm mtf, just decided out of sheer curiosity to come browse how the other genders life is for some reason. Then, I stumbled on this post. You sound like me, when I was 14,15,16,17, in high school. I just have "the other side" of that coin. I tried living female, and I did! But, it wasn't easy, at the time. That was back in 99,00,01,and 02. It doesn't sound so far back, but hey it sort is in terms of how things were. I was constantly mocked, called all sorts of non trans related slander, jumped, even chased down once by dummies in a pick up and had rocks thrown at me walking home. And I did not one lick look female, home life was tough, etc etc, seriously, my dad would beat me, my now significant other was my girlfriend in middle school, and in high school a close friend who I sought refuge in from the world. It wasn't an easy time, and you know what I wish to god I had then? That I never for a second did have, but can Atleast offer and be? That voice from transition land that's saying...."keep on keeping on, things are tough and no matter how hard the depression is, it will get better." I wish I could say or offer more advice, it's a tough time in life :( but hang in there, even the hell I went through I wouldn't trade it for the world, because it helped me get a charector and level of being able to tell how somone is without much interaction with them. Or maybe that's just intuition? Lol, idk, but seriously lil guy, hang in there! Much love from the other side of the coin. :) don't give up!
-hugs
My advice - I'd stop worrying about what other people are doing and focus on your studies. Being well educated, well spoken and having a successful life isn't something ALL of your peers will experience.
Quote from: randomroads on September 03, 2013, 09:23:45 PM
My advice - I'd stop worrying about what other people are doing and focus on your studies. Being well educated, well spoken and having a successful life isn't something ALL of your peers will experience.
No offence but that didn't help
Quote from: Brandon on September 03, 2013, 09:26:50 PM
No offence but that didn't help
Are you actually asking for help? Nobody can give you what you want (to be born male). It is not possible. So what are you asking for here?
Sounds like you're venting which is cool. But I'm sure it hurts. But once you get on T, size doesn't really matter. There are a lot of really short cisguys. I pass much of the time, and I was on a very low dose for a couple months-- meaning I have been on full dose T for about 4 months. Eventually most guys on T do pass. There are exceptions here and there, but to me (if that is your face) you already look as if you pass some of the time. Lots of guys end up dating straight or bi girls.
Getting your education and making money will help you in your transition and in your life in general of course.
--Jay
Quote from: aleon515 on September 03, 2013, 09:43:18 PM
Sounds like you're venting which is cool. But I'm sure it hurts. But once you get on T, size doesn't really matter. There are a lot of really short cisguys. I pass much of the time, and I was on a very low dose for a couple months-- meaning I have been on full dose T for about 4 months. Eventually most guys on T do pass. There are exceptions here and there, but to me (if that is your face) you already look as if you pass some of the time. Lots of guys end up dating straight or bi girls.
Getting your education and making money will help you in your transition and in your life in general of course.
--Jay
Yea, But its still hard to manage dysphoria its hard not to focus on it
I'm never offended by people rejecting my advice, but you'd do better to focus on the things you can have (a life full of success) rather than hold on to the fact that you're short. If that's not helpful, then that's not my problem.
Quote from: randomroads on September 03, 2013, 10:55:38 PM
I'm never offended by people rejecting my advice, but you'd do better to focus on the things you can have (a life full of success) rather than hold on to the fact that you're short. If that's not helpful, then that's not my problem.
You obviously didnt read the whole thing, You missed my whole point, Nice help
Dude. i'm in the same situation as you, everyone thinks I'm 10-12 and that I don't belong in high school. I've managed to keep up a short-term relationship with a cisgirl, but then things turned ugly because my friend tried to help me out and make her stop being so clingy by saying I dated a guy. I went with the whole thing because I wanted to feel normal, knowing that I wasn't going to let it progress no matter what, and hated being selfish and not telling her. It hurts whether you do or you don't with cisgirls who know nothing of trans issues- unless they're accepting and willing to overlook your parts, then you either have a weirded-out girl who makes you feel awful or the guilt of not being able to tell her or do something with her if you wanted to eats at you. It all eats at you- if you let it.
You don't have to let it. Dysphoria is a nagging b*tch but you can actually tune it out, you're taking a defeatist approach to the whole thing. Venting is cool, but it's only helpful if you work on changing what you can to decrease the negative in your life as much as possible. Everybody vents once in a while, but then they move on. Me? I've come to deal with the "OMG YOU'RE A SENIOR?! BUT YOU'RE SO TINY!!!11" comments because it isn't worth my time worrying about it. I've got bigger issues, maybe not everybody deals with their joints being ripped apart on the inside but it puts things into perspective for me. The damage being done is permanent; the dysphoria I feel right now is temporary. So is yours. One day you're going to look yourself in the mirror and be okay, so long as you don't let it get to your head now. We're here for you, man.
By the way, I know how it is with the parents. My mom screams at me all the time and has breakdowns over the tiniest trans-related thing because she can't comprehend me being a "freak" and thinks I'm just confused and a lesbian. My dad is horrible and makes fun of me about it all the time, and I don't even see the rest of my family but they wouldn't support me either. There's no adult for me to turn to who will lend an ear or offer advice. That's why I come here, where people don't act like jerks to me and tell me that presenting as a boy is "false advertisement". You want change in your life? Take it for yourself. Tell people, one by one, to call you Brandon and use male pronouns. Get some support- students, teachers, staff, whoever will listen and accept you. Once someone enforces it, others will follow suit, and if anyone decides to be dumb and go against it that's their problem. You have an issue, you take it to someone in the school who can resolve it. Your mom doesn't have to agree with it, but if you can, give her reading material to try and help her understand at the very least what you're going through.
Best of luck. I haven't gone back to school yet, but when I do I'm going to try being out or stealth with teachers. I'm terrified of the thought but in the end, it's my right to be who I am, and the same holds for you. Only good thing about waiting is that it means science develops more, and while the phallus that we can have created isn't perfect, it's pretty close. Who knows, maybe in our lifetime they'll come up with a way to create one that "works" without needing a pump and all. But yeah, try to find anything you can to take your mind off of what you don't have. I find that it helps to go along with people's assumptions and play the part of little kid. I don't even "feel" trans anymore because I've settled into a niche of being stealth, and I'm pre-T too. It's definitely doable if you play your cards right.
I understand about the no girlfriend thing and the looking like you're 12 thing. I've only had one serious girlfriend and she is straight and saw me as a man but it didn't sound right to me and because I don't accept myself, I suppose it kind of put a little stress on my relationship. She accepted me but I didn't and don't truly accept myself and I personally don't feel any ounce of happiness unless I'm in a relationship or I'm drunk so I understand why you want a girlfriend, I think. I'm 19 years old and every time I smoke a cigarette, people give me weird looks and I've had people come up to me and say "You're too young to smoke!" and I just got my ID and I get so nervous buying cigarettes that the cashier gives me weird looks, like it's a fake ID, because I act so nervous and then they look at me like I'm on something when they scan my ID and see that it's real, they look at me like "Why are you acting so odd and why is your hand shaking" I'm afraid the cashier will refuse to sell me cigarettes and say something to me and it scares me to death because I don't like conflict of any kind. And trust me, I'm very picky when it comes to thinking of my future girlfriend, my standards are so high that I don't think anyone could possibly ever meet them and if they did meet them then they wouldn't want someone like me, I don't mean because I'm Trans, I mean that I won't have anything to give them, if they wanted a pop from the pop machine I wouldn't be able to give them a dollar for it and I'm too clingy and possessive. I also understand about high school but in high school, I had two best friends. I actually decided to get back in touch with one of them today and he came over to hang out. He was a labeled a loser and a nerd because he's obsessed with technology and people used to put tampons on his back and the other boys would hit him in middle school. The other friend I had was a redneck and he's honestly the best friend I've ever had, his mother told him that I was a girl not a boy and he ended up getting in a fight with her and storming out of his house, he moved to Virginia though. So, if you want friends who are guys then you need to think about what type of guys you are trying to be friends with, you don't want to hang out with people who you have nothing in common with. Don't aim for popularity, just aim for a friend and who knows, that friend could introduce you to a bunch of other people and then you'll have a lot of friends. And yes, it caused me major dysphoria when I walked past a tall guy and gym class was a nightmare because I became envious when I saw all the guys going into the boys locker room, I hate locker rooms but the fact that they were able to use the guys locker room is what got to me.
Quote from: Mosnar_K on September 04, 2013, 02:27:41 AM
I understand about the no girlfriend thing and the looking like you're 12 thing. I've only had one serious girlfriend and she is straight and saw me as a man but it didn't sound right to me and because I don't accept myself, I suppose it kind of put a little stress on my relationship. She accepted me but I didn't and don't truly accept myself and I personally don't feel any ounce of happiness unless I'm in a relationship or I'm drunk so I understand why you want a girlfriend, I think. I'm 19 years old and every time I smoke a cigarette, people give me weird looks and I've had people come up to me and say "You're too young to smoke!" and I just got my ID and I get so nervous buying cigarettes that the cashier gives me weird looks, like it's a fake ID, because I act so nervous and then they look at me like I'm on something when they scan my ID and see that it's real, they look at me like "Why are you acting so odd and why is your hand shaking" I'm afraid the cashier will refuse to sell me cigarettes and say something to me and it scares me to death because I don't like conflict of any kind. And trust me, I'm very picky when it comes to thinking of my future girlfriend, my standards are so high that I don't think anyone could possibly ever meet them and if they did meet them then they wouldn't want someone like me, I don't mean because I'm Trans, I mean that I won't have anything to give them, if they wanted a pop from the pop machine I wouldn't be able to give them a dollar for it and I'm too clingy and possessive. I also understand about high school but in high school, I had two best friends. I actually decided to get back in touch with one of them today and he came over to hang out. He was a labeled a loser and a nerd because he's obsessed with technology and people used to put tampons on his back and the other boys would hit him in middle school. The other friend I had was a redneck and he's honestly the best friend I've ever had, his mother told him that I was a girl not a boy and he ended up getting in a fight with her and storming out of his house, he moved to Virginia though. So, if you want friends who are guys then you need to think about what type of guys you are trying to be friends with, you don't want to hang out with people who you have nothing in common with. Don't aim for popularity, just aim for a friend and who knows, that friend could introduce you to a bunch of other people and then you'll have a lot of friends. And yes, it caused me major dysphoria when I walked past a tall guy and gym class was a nightmare because I became envious when I saw all the guys going into the boys locker room, I hate locker rooms but the fact that they were able to use the guys locker room is what got to me.
Well as far as aiming for popular I don't just aim for it but thats mostly the people I talk to, Even if I was born with the right parts that would be who I talk to the most Im a cool person
Okay. If you get along with that group of people and they share your interests then go for it.
Quote from: Mosnar_K on September 05, 2013, 12:10:31 AM
Okay. If you get along with that group of people and they share your interests then go for it.
Okay
Quote from: Liminal Stranger on September 04, 2013, 12:59:21 AM
Dude. i'm in the same situation as you, everyone thinks I'm 10-12 and that I don't belong in high school. I've managed to keep up a short-term relationship with a cisgirl, but then things turned ugly because my friend tried to help me out and make her stop being so clingy by saying I dated a guy. I went with the whole thing because I wanted to feel normal, knowing that I wasn't going to let it progress no matter what, and hated being selfish and not telling her. It hurts whether you do or you don't with cisgirls who know nothing of trans issues- unless they're accepting and willing to overlook your parts, then you either have a weirded-out girl who makes you feel awful or the guilt of not being able to tell her or do something with her if you wanted to eats at you. It all eats at you- if you let it.
You don't have to let it. Dysphoria is a nagging b*tch but you can actually tune it out, you're taking a defeatist approach to the whole thing. Venting is cool, but it's only helpful if you work on changing what you can to decrease the negative in your life as much as possible. Everybody vents once in a while, but then they move on. Me? I've come to deal with the "OMG YOU'RE A SENIOR?! BUT YOU'RE SO TINY!!!11" comments because it isn't worth my time worrying about it. I've got bigger issues, maybe not everybody deals with their joints being ripped apart on the inside but it puts things into perspective for me. The damage being done is permanent; the dysphoria I feel right now is temporary. So is yours. One day you're going to look yourself in the mirror and be okay, so long as you don't let it get to your head now. We're here for you, man.
By the way, I know how it is with the parents. My mom screams at me all the time and has breakdowns over the tiniest trans-related thing because she can't comprehend me being a "freak" and thinks I'm just confused and a lesbian. My dad is horrible and makes fun of me about it all the time, and I don't even see the rest of my family but they wouldn't support me either. There's no adult for me to turn to who will lend an ear or offer advice. That's why I come here, where people don't act like jerks to me and tell me that presenting as a boy is "false advertisement". You want change in your life? Take it for yourself. Tell people, one by one, to call you Brandon and use male pronouns. Get some support- students, teachers, staff, whoever will listen and accept you. Once someone enforces it, others will follow suit, and if anyone decides to be dumb and go against it that's their problem. You have an issue, you take it to someone in the school who can resolve it. Your mom doesn't have to agree with it, but if you can, give her reading material to try and help her understand at the very least what you're going through.
Best of luck. I haven't gone back to school yet, but when I do I'm going to try being out or stealth with teachers. I'm terrified of the thought but in the end, it's my right to be who I am, and the same holds for you. Only good thing about waiting is that it means science develops more, and while the phallus that we can have created isn't perfect, it's pretty close. Who knows, maybe in our lifetime they'll come up with a way to create one that "works" without needing a pump and all. But yeah, try to find anything you can to take your mind off of what you don't have. I find that it helps to go along with people's assumptions and play the part of little kid. I don't even "feel" trans anymore because I've settled into a niche of being stealth, and I'm pre-T too. It's definitely doable if you play your cards right.
It's hard to think positive when you have had negative thrown at you, Its like I've been called ugly all my life to the point were if a girl does call me cute I don't believe it because its been put n my head that I'm ugly, I can't just stop being dysphoric, Especially when I'm at school everyone has different levels of dysphoria mine is probally worse that's what I'm trying to explain to you guys
Quote from: Brandon on September 06, 2013, 05:47:08 PM
It's hard to think positive when you have had negative thrown at you, Its like I've been called ugly all my life to the point were if a girl does call me cute I don't believe it because its been put n my head that I'm ugly, I can't just stop being dysphoric, Especially when I'm at school everyone has different levels of dysphoria mine is probally worse that's what I'm trying to explain to you guys
We all know that levels of dysphoria vary, but I doubt yours is worse than what other people here have experienced at some point in their lives. People have killed themselves from dysphoria. So, you're not alone in feeling awful about how you look and how society treats you. Most of us here have been in your shoes at some point.
I understand it's hard to think positively, it's not something that comes quickly overnight. To me, being positive and being happy and accepting myself is an
exercise that I need to work at every day. It took me a long time to realize that happiness and self-acceptance isn't something that comes naturally to me (or most people). It'll take you time to figure that out as well. You'll discover over time ways to make yourself feel better, to ignore and forget critical/mean things people say to you, and to live your life the way that you're meant to. I have negatives thrown at me everyday, but I've found ways to not let it bother me, and so will you if you give life a shot. :)