If told being trans means losing all sensitivity or the ability to climax...
How important is the transitioning basis of your sexual function in the landscape of your dysphoria?
I'd still transition. It was never really a part of my decision. Although it will be a nice bonus to have baring any complications.
Hell yes I would still definitely transition I hated testosterone and I also hated erections. Uncontrollable horniness and a lot of ->-bleeped-<-ty smells guys Cologne and body smell compared to the women's products and natural body sent I am not doing it for anyone but myself
For me I know I would absolutely, orgasms can be nice but are only such a small part of my life, and it's the rest of my life as my real gender that is really important to me :) As far as sex goes I find I get the most pleasure from pleasing my partner anyway..
I'm guessing most here will answer along these lines, it's a very interesting question though- as always thankyou Evelyn :-*
This one is a real tough one for me. I think it could be a deal breaker. Since my transition is mostly for vanity reasons; and for what other purpose than to find and have intimacy with someone you love? I can't *ever* imagine being asexual. Human intimacy is a powerful motivating drive.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi61.tinypic.com%2F296fynl.jpg&hash=969aaeb5761e38d7fb3d0deb60db5d46f8d3b1a9)
Yes 10000%.
Was part of my list of danger with GCS.
I am 7 weeks post OP and I am still not orgasmic. I do not miss it so much. I am happier than ever before. Although I miss sex and I date man to choose the right one for my first vaginal sex.
Lara
My solo ones are barely worth the time and i wouldn't hold my breath on my bf ever giving me one. Hopefully they'll be more fun after GCS, but it's really not a big deal either way.
I would still begin transition. Being physically and socially female is more important for me than sexual pleasure. I would rather be a female for the rest of my life than have a good orgasm. Of course I would miss it, but still being who I want to be and be comfortable with myself and my body is more important.
^^ I can connect with a lot of what you say. Maybe perhaps even this too.
I guess we'll see how much I *really* enjoy being female. It's still early. It's huge sandbox out there.
That depends... am I allowed to be on hormones or not?
If I'd be forced to be completely male, male hormones and all, then yes, I DEFINITELY would have taken transition over orgasm. Orgasm is enjoyable and all, but it's NOT worth having that poisonous hormone in my system making my hair fall out, body hair grow everywhere, destroying my emotions and my state of mind, and making me think about sex every 2 seconds.
If I would be allowed to stay on HRT despite being stuck presenting as male publicly, it would be a tough decision. I LOVE my more feminine sexual function, and I don't know if I'd want to give it up. But I also had a really bad time being male publicly despite being on hormones, so again, it would be a very tough decision.
Quote from: Evelyn K on August 25, 2014, 03:28:44 AM
I guess we'll see how much I *really* enjoy being female. It's still early. It's huge sandbox out there.
I feel it same way, because I am still in the beginning, I am in andro mode in work and with friends. But I have a huge hope that it will be wonderful :).
Yes I would but I might feel a little down knowing I wouldnt be able to experience it, Ill be honest about that. Eventually I would probably lose interest in orgasming
As it is now I cant orgasm from solo mastrubation, erections get rarer and harder to get into. My sexuality is somewhere between a female and male atm, just like my body
Its a bit confusing and I dont know where its headed apart from the fact I want SRS when its possible
I use to think no, but now as long as there's sensation it doesn't matter
I was very well informed of that kind of risk well before transitioning
Since I started finasteride over 2 years ago, things started to retreat. HRT mostly killed all interest and now 6 weeks after a switch from spiro to Androcur, absolutely nothing happens. What if it doesn't come back? Oh well, never mind! Still going ahead regardless. I am 52, been (and remain) married for over 27 years and children are 18 & 19 so maybe I have a slightly different perspective. If I was 30 years younger, I might feel differently.
HRT yes... the pain had become sufficiently great that it was essentially a life/death choice.
SRS... I don't know... I was told it was a "minor risk" like <1% so I considered it negligible, but I wasn't miserable I wanted the downstairs surgery for pragmatic reasons.
one of the big ones those was to finally be able to take part in sexual relationships, If you can't orgasm or get pleasure from down there it means that the operation was essentially a partial failure and my other objectives could have been better met with an orchi rather than SRS. cuz I'd have wasted all those resources in getting an Orchi over SRS.
Yep.....for sure...
Carrie
Quote from: Evelyn K on August 25, 2014, 01:29:18 AM
If told being trans means losing all sensitivity or the ability to climax...
How important is the transitioning basis of your sexual function in the landscape of your dysphoria?
I always knew this possibility. I went into SRS assuming I would never have sexual feeling and decided it would be worth it. Luckily this didn't happen, though the doctor asked me to hold off exploring for another few weeks.
Just to be clear, is the question about not being able to orgasm in a 'male way'? If so then yes, I would still complete an SRS as part of my transition.
For whatever reason, the male sexual response was almost always a major letdown for me. It felt mechanical and unrewarding because I didn't like the feeling of erections and most of the time there was little to no worthwhile sensation during ejaculation. Basically I did it because it was all I had and knew. It was only when I began to think about myself as a woman in the right sexual context that I actually began to experience full-blown orgasms. These occur with very little sensation in the area where the male response would be felt (in fact I have to avoid such stimulation). They are usually full-body in every other way and a VERY different experience. Orgasms now are everything that I'd been missing and more than I could have hoped for. I'm now able sometimes to trigger them purely mentally which is something I never expected.
If you are asking the question, "Would you have SRS if you completely lost ALL ability to orgasm?" then I would have to think about it more. Given what I've gained already in this regard without having had SRS and because it is so differently focused physically and mentally, I'd have a hard time believing SRS would eliminate my ability to orgasm the way that I do now. In short, I've already eliminated the need or use for my male sexual response - If I can have a female orgasm now from just a thought, why would SRS undo that ability?
Usually I hate these sort of hypothetical questions, but...
Honestly I don't think I had much to lose when I started my transition anyways. I mean, I could orgasm, but I literally have never been able to orgasm with a partner, too much stamina and too desensitized down there to actually be able to finish while having sex. On top of that, I absolutely loathed my sex drive. Apparently I didn't have it that bad compared to other male-bodied people, but at the same time it was still an annoying, persistent need. The pre-HRT orgasms never really felt like anything either, it was just something I did to stop feeling aroused, not because I particularly enjoyed it. So... I probably wouldn't have minded if I lost the ability completely.
Oh yes definitely. My therapist posed this questions early on; "what part of your current life are you willing to give up to transition?" A fair and realistic question that I answered with feeling this is saving my life, I don't feel i am giving anything up so much as recognizing my core identity and gaining a new life. Orgasm is a fleeting few minutes (if we are lucky) of a hopefully longer intimate experience. Romance, affection and intimacy are the lasting features of a loving relationship for me.
Quote from: Violet Bloom on August 25, 2014, 11:17:55 AM
Just to be clear, is the question about not being able to orgasm in a 'male way'? If so then yes, I would still complete an SRS as part of my transition.
For whatever reason, the male sexual response was almost always a major letdown for me. It felt mechanical and unrewarding because I didn't like the feeling of erections and most of the time there was little to no worthwhile sensation during ejaculation. Basically I did it because it was all I had and knew. It was only when I began to think about myself as a woman in the right sexual context that I actually began to experience full-blown orgasms. These occur with very little sensation in the area where the male response would be felt (in fact I have to avoid such stimulation). They are usually full-body in every other way and a VERY different experience. Orgasms now are everything that I'd been missing and more than I could have hoped for. I'm now able sometimes to trigger them purely mentally which is something I never expected.
If you are asking the question, "Would you have SRS if you completely lost ALL ability to orgasm?" then I would have to think about it more. Given what I've gained already in this regard without having had SRS and because it is so differently focused physically and mentally, I'd have a hard time believing SRS would eliminate my ability to orgasm the way that I do now. In short, I've already eliminated the need or use for my male sexual response - If I can have a female orgasm now from just a thought, why would SRS undo that ability?
I have no desire for male orgams either but the curiousity for female sensation is nagging me a bit: I am 4 months on HRT and I am kind of in limbo now that my body is shifting but still in a male-female 'hybrid' stage. I dont hate my peepee but now that I cant come 'the easy 5min way' anymore and treat it more like a semi-clit/semi-peepee I have a lot of trouble getting anywhere
I have the rare tingly feeling but that has been 1 or 2 times during the last 2 months. Solo masturbation as I do it now just doesnt work apart from preventing atrophy (Not sure if thats even needed, mixed opinions) and I dont have a partner
How did you make the switch? What (didnt) worked?
Not important at all to me. I'm already asexual. I just want to look like any other girl down there and not have these gross dangly bits that get in the way and bulge through clothing.
Yes. I plan to have SRS someday, though it is possible that I will change my mind. Although I would very much like to orgasm post-SRS, that will absolutely not be the deciding factor in the SRS decision.
Kim :)
Quote from: YinYanga on August 25, 2014, 12:21:34 PM
I have no desire for male orgams either but the curiousity for female sensation is nagging me a bit: I am 4 months on HRT and I am kind of in limbo now that my body is shifting but still in a male-female 'hybrid' stage. I dont hate my peepee but now that I cant come 'the easy 5min way' anymore and treat it more like a semi-clit/semi-peepee I have a lot of trouble getting anywhere
I have the rare tingly feeling but that has been 1 or 2 times during the last 2 months. Solo masturbation as I do it now just doesnt work apart from preventing atrophy (Not sure if thats even needed, mixed opinions) and I dont have a partner
How did you make the switch? What (didnt) worked?
I'll try to say this without going all TMI. Something actually changed in me pre-HRT. It happened shortly after I finally realized that
I could be a woman (rather than a man) sexually with another woman. One day I had been reading a couple of accounts of transwomen relating their post-SRS sexual experiences and how they differed from pre-op sensations. I was feeling kinda down and barely in the mood for masterbation but for some reason I went for it anyway. I wasn't taking it very seriously and I didn't have much of an erection because I had become so dysphoric and depressed about it. That said, I was vaguely visualizing my female sexual role and remembering what I had just read. I noticed something very different building up in me - kind of a warmth and a buzz starting in my abdomen and spreading out. It ramped up into a huge full-body orgasm, almost every muscle tensing hard and pressure in my head like my skull was going to burst. There was no ejaculation. I was completely shocked and overwhelmed by the experience.
I was worried that it was a fluke but I learned to occasionally repeat it. I have to consider the following:
- My sex drive is very low so I have to wait a long time between attempts.
- Having an erection and pretty much any type of stroking action are completely counter-productive because it automatically starts up the male-type progression. It is difficult but the idea is to 'short-circuit' the male-type responses otherwise they will run their course before the female response has time to build up.
- I have to be in the mood for it and have to visualize my female role with another woman.
Later on I found more success in combining fantasy with insertable vibrators. This is also tricky to get right. Sometimes it results in a dull male ejaculation and others a full-tilt female orgasm. Practice is key as is remembering what works. For me change began solely in the mind and has simply improved and evolved through HRT. I can tell you beyond any doubt that I now know what it means to vocalize and spasm uncontrollably, almost to the point where it is unbearable occasionally. It actually has me worried about the intensity if I were to be in an intimate encounter with a partner.
Another wondrous thing I discovered recently, and I'll probably start a separate thread about it, is spontaneous, mentally-triggered female orgasms. I don't know if this has developed through HRT or not.
Yes, I would still transition. I couldn't care less about sex or orgasms and I don't need either to be happy, I just need to feel right about myself.
Quote from: Violet Bloom on August 25, 2014, 04:25:45 PM
I'll try to say this without going all TMI. Something actually changed in me pre-HRT. It happened shortly after I finally realized that I could be a woman (rather than a man) sexually with another woman. One day I had been reading a couple of accounts of transwomen relating their post-SRS sexual experiences and how they differed from pre-op sensations. I was feeling kinda down and barely in the mood for masterbation but for some reason I went for it anyway. I wasn't taking it very seriously and I didn't have much of an erection because I had become so dysphoric and depressed about it. That said, I was vaguely visualizing my female sexual role and remembering what I had just read. I noticed something very different building up in me - kind of a warmth and a buzz starting in my abdomen and spreading out. It ramped up into a huge full-body orgasm, almost every muscle tensing hard and pressure in my head like my skull was going to burst. There was no ejaculation. I was completely shocked and overwhelmed by the experience.
I was worried that it was a fluke but I learned to occasionally repeat it. I have to consider the following:
- My sex drive is very low so I have to wait a long time between attempts.
- Having an erection and pretty much any type of stroking action are completely counter-productive because it automatically starts up the male-type progression. It is difficult but the idea is to 'short-circuit' the male-type responses otherwise they will run their course before the female response has time to build up.
- I have to be in the mood for it and have to visualize my female role with another woman.
Later on I found more success in combining fantasy with insertable vibrators. This is also tricky to get right. Sometimes it results in a dull male ejaculation and others a full-tilt female orgasm. Practice is key as is remembering what works. For me change began solely in the mind and has simply improved and evolved through HRT. I can tell you beyond any doubt that I now know what it means to vocalize and spasm uncontrollably, almost to the point where it is unbearable occasionally. It actually has me worried about the intensity if I were to be in an intimate encounter with a partner.
Another wondrous thing I discovered recently, and I'll probably start a separate thread about it, is spontaneous, mentally-triggered female orgasms. I don't know if this has developed through HRT or not.
Thank you for the elaborate response...its very nice to see you experience things in a fashion that sounds very appealing. Also a little frustrating because its hard to get started somewhere and stay concentrated. I see myself more and more as a women in my fantasy and bedroom but the images end up too weak and easily distorted . I know my 'clit' (top op peepee), nipples and massaging the place where a vagina would be give me some sensation but its not enough for more than just a weak enjoyable feeling
Maybe Ill need to up the frequency and start playing with some toys/literotica or something
I had srs whilst reluctantly accepting the notion that I could become inorgasmic. The first few weeks of being inorgasmic immediately post-op was something I had expected, but took with great difficulty when the reality hit home. For two or three weeks, the inability to orgasm grew from a small discomfort to an obsession. I had to know whether I could do it and I needed to know how. After a couple of weeks of unsuccessful experimentation and frustration, I did get there. And one wasn't enough, I needed to know whether that was a one-off fluke. To my relief, it wasn't. And I can now have an orgasm on demand.
Strangely, over the last three months, I've had three stimulation-free orgasms whilst waking up from dreaming. One of the last orgasms I had in my dreams was triggered by anxiety during an exam I was taking in that dream, nothing to do with sex. Imagine a Harry Met Sally scene in an exam room! Spontaneous orgasm whilst taking an exam. I woke up and was throbbing with pleasure. Anxiety-triggered orgasms are not unheard of, apparently.
What was the question? :P
Quote from: Nicolette on August 25, 2014, 04:59:56 PM
I had srs whilst reluctantly accepting the notion that I could become inorgasmic. The first few weeks of being inorgasmic immediately post-op was something I had expected, but took with great difficulty when the reality hit home. For two or three weeks, the inability to orgasm grew from a small discomfort to an obsession. I had to know whether I could do it and I needed to know how. After a couple of weeks of unsuccessful experimentation and frustration, I did get there. And one wasn't enough, I needed to know whether that was a one-off fluke. To my relief, it wasn't. And I can now have an orgasm on demand.
Strangely, over the last three months, I've had three stimulation-free orgasms whilst waking up from dreaming. One of the last orgasms I had in my dreams was triggered by anxiety during an exam I was taking in that dream, nothing to do with sex. Imagine a Harry Met Sally scene in an exam room! Spontaneous orgasm whilst taking an exam. I woke up and was throbbing with pleasure. Anxiety-triggered orgasms are not unheard of, apparently.
What was the question? :P
Cant remember..... still awe-struck reading your dreamy orgasms. You girls get the weirdest stuff really!
Quote from: YinYanga on August 25, 2014, 04:45:34 PM
Thank you for the elaborate response...its very nice to see you experience things in a fashion that sounds very appealing. Also a little frustrating because its hard to get started somewhere and stay concentrated. I see myself more and more as a women in my fantasy and bedroom but the images end up too weak and easily distorted . I know my 'clit' (top op peepee), nipples and massaging the place where a vagina would be give me some sensation but its not enough for more than just a weak enjoyable feeling
Maybe Ill need to up the frequency and start playing with some toys/literotica or something
I'm sure it's slightly different for everyone. Lots of cis women have difficulty or an complete inability to orgasm. There's probably a full range of response and capabilities in transwomen as well. Certainly I never expected anything because I'd never really had any proper response as a man. As such I don't in any way take for granted what I've discovered about myself. I feel very lucky for my new experiences.
One other thing I forgot to mention - I'm not a big fan of porn but what little I did seek out had to have genuine female orgasms and not a bunch of bs. I don't really have interest in it any longer, but at the time I was still 'male in mind' I found I had to try to 'share' the woman's orgasm to get any sort of stimulation out of it. This played a big part in me understanding myself and learning I was trans. The last stuff I could stand to watch was legit lesbian content, although there isn't much of it out there of any quality. I feel what I experienced through these actually helped free and train my mind to respond sexually as a female. Nowadays my even lower sex drive and yearning for a real partner have pretty much ended my viewing.
Quote from: Nicolette on August 25, 2014, 04:59:56 PM
I had srs whilst reluctantly accepting the notion that I could become inorgasmic. The first few weeks of being inorgasmic immediately post-op was something I had expected, but took with great difficulty when the reality hit home. For two or three weeks, the inability to orgasm grew from a small discomfort to an obsession. I had to know whether I could do it and I needed to know how. After a couple of weeks of unsuccessful experimentation and frustration, I did get there. And one wasn't enough, I needed to know whether that was a one-off fluke. To my relief, it wasn't. And I can now have an orgasm on demand.
Strangely, over the last three months, I've had three stimulation-free orgasms whilst waking up from dreaming. One of the last orgasms I had in my dreams was triggered by anxiety during an exam I was taking in that dream, nothing to do with sex. Imagine a Harry Met Sally scene in an exam room! Spontaneous orgasm whilst taking an exam. I woke up and was throbbing with pleasure. Anxiety-triggered orgasms are not unheard of, apparently.
What was the question? :P
Um, now you're scaring me a bit! If I can already do this
now, what's going to happen to me
after SRS? :o
Yes, definitely. As others have said, I went into GRS knowing full well it was a possible side effect; hoping against it, but informed. I'm lucky enough to be able to orgasm from breast/nipple play alone sometimes, though, so I figured I had a good chance of retaining *that* much.
(For anyone who's curious, yes, the bits do in fact still work. I was orgasmic in my sleep at 3 weeks post-op, though it took a few months to figure out all the new buttons and switches so I could do it on purpose.)
Yes, I would. Death is about the only thing that would for sure stop me now.
I mostly want SRS so I can be more comfortable in my body and wear more of the clothes I like. I would definitely do it anyway. I have a pretty low sex drive anyway, but if I really wanted sexual pleasure I could have anal sex... :eusa_shifty:
A BIG definite YES! I guess I will find out this next year.
yes.
Sorry for the TMI, but I can't even orgasm as a guy. And penis just doesn't feel right, so yeah yeah yeah yeah.
Quote from: Ashlotte on August 25, 2014, 06:55:16 PM
I mostly want SRS so I can be more comfortable in my body and wear more of the clothes I like.
This incidental benefit of SRS is really starting to transform my life. The fact that I can now wear short tops and figure hugging (crotch hugging!) jeans, without painful tucking and without bulges showing, is priceless. The confidence boost is phenomenal.
This has actually been on my mind quite a bit lately. I unfortunately don't have a clear, solid answer. I can say that masturbation definitely feels good, and that fact alone is likely why I don't have a more negative feeling about my nether bits than I do. I do wish they worked more on my schedule than their own, but giving up orgasm outright seems unappealing. I really have no desire to be completely asexual. At the same time, I know several of you (♡ Emily ♡ comes to mind) have mentioned that as your sex drive decreases, you don't notice the change as much as you think you would, and tend not to miss it.
I can say I hope for changing forms rather than disappearing outright. At the same time, I remember not caring about sex when I was young, and being perfectly happy then, so it's probably not the worst thing in the world. I just know I'm scared of changes, even necessary ones, and tend to mull over and weigh possibilities before acting.
Quote from: Evelyn K on August 25, 2014, 02:07:56 AM
This one is a real tough one for me. I think it could be a deal breaker. Since my transition is mostly for vanity reasons; and for what other purpose than to find and have intimacy with someone you love? I can't *ever* imagine being asexual. Human intimacy is a powerful motivating drive.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi61.tinypic.com%2F296fynl.jpg&hash=969aaeb5761e38d7fb3d0deb60db5d46f8d3b1a9)
Well are you talking about just the function of the penis? If so, it prolly doens't pertain to pre-op women. But for women who are going to have surgery, then yes I would still transition if I could only feel the sensate feeling of penetration without the ability to orgasm with the neo-vagina. But if you're a non-op, I guess that could be a big problem as I have zero ability to achieve an erection after 11 months of transition on a regular dose of HRT.
I transitioned before that but both AAs and E were 50 percent below what would be considered the minimal dose of HRT one would start at with a well-respected gender clinic or endo who knows what they are doing. So pretty low. And even then my dose has been eratic but not anymore as my insurance covers all insurance related costs now and I have medicaid. But even with the low, low dose, I lost most of my ability to do anything and my T was very, very low considering.
But masturbating brought such shame and physical sickness I wouldn't do it if I could. I was off spiro for almost two months and my ability came back and I did it once, and I nearly threw up afterwards. I felt so low.
Quote from: Nicolette on August 25, 2014, 07:08:55 PM
This incidental benefit of SRS is really starting to transform my life. The fact that I can now wear short tops and figure hugging (crotch hugging!) jeans, without painful tucking and without bulges showing, is priceless. The confidence boost is phenomenal.
Hmm, I never thought of that, but I can wear skinny jeans, really tight ones, with no tucking. Nothing shows. I could probably wear a bikini. With enough time on HRT, this should happen. I think?
I transitioned to be comfortable in my own skin and regain the will to live. I spend 100% of my time in my skin and 99.9% of that time, I am not having an orgasm.
You can't have an orgasm when you're dead, right? I mean, I'd like to retain that ability, but we're talking about something that makes up less than 1% of my life.
Perspective...
Orgasms are important to me, and I'm not willing to go the rest of my life without another one, so, I'm still deciding whether to have SRS or not. And if I decide in favor of SRS, I am only considering the best of the best surgeons to do it; and yes there is still a risk, but it's minimized.
I would still complete my transition without any doubt whatsoever. As someone who actively considered self-harm "down there" and having discussed this with my therapist, it's something that I have as a personal high priority to get done once I can afford it.
Yeap Id still transition
I'd still transition. My testicals are like so small now its just like well good luck with making me 'ejaculate'(possibly TMI lol), but heres something interesting and Im not sure if this is just me or what. Ok say something is going on sexually, when Im aroused I basically leak fluid, same as before(males do this just prior to sex ie. natures lube) except now it happens alot, throughout the process, pretty much constantly. I cannot ejaculate anymore, wont happen, it would fall off or cause me so much extreme discomfort from endless friction that its just a waste of time, but interestingly my brain still goes through the motions of an 'orgasm'.
Like I said this could just be me, or it could be quite common with Tgirls, not entirely sure. And tbh, I prefer this way of orgasm, it lasts forever, can happen multiple times, and less mess....yay!
Well our outies do not function like a cis man's penis. We have to go through the same motions mentally any other woman goes through to orgasm once we're on hrt. And orgasms are all about the brain first, not just physical stimulation.
Anyways to answer the thread's question, yes I would still transition. Orgasms are great and all but I have tons of things I want to do in my lifetime and I'd rather do those things as my true self than living a lie with lots of physical and mental pain.
I think I would be even more inclined to transition if I was told that I would never be able to orgasm again. I really would prefer to never orgasm as a male again though I would definitely be interested in having a female orgasm at least once.
Here is my short and simple answer to that question. Yes, because becoming a woman for me is worth losing orgasms. It's entirely more important to feel comfortable in my own body then it is to have an orgasm.
Yes.
I never had a high libido, that's why I have cackled when the marriage counselor recommended a sex addiction mitigation therapist. I like sex well enough, but it doesn't run my life.
My my most recent orgasm was a few days pre-op. I feel I will have no trouble in time post-op in due time after some more healing issues are resolved. If not, no biggie, lack of orgasm, won't preclude sexual activity for me anyhow.
I'm living my life in the most outgoing, fullest experience ever. Even deep skeptics like my mom have conceded that I'm a changed for the better person.
Well after 1.5 years on HRT I can no longer get an erection. It's just silly to even try. I DO NOT miss it. I have learned how to orgasm in different ways than I used to. Not being able to orgasm would be devastating to me. But I still get a thousand times more satisfaction knowing that my body is changing and I'm more happy then I've ever been in my life, orgasms or not.
Then again, SRS isn't really the holy grail of transitioning for me.
Quote from: Joanna Dark on August 25, 2014, 07:13:42 PM
Hmm, I never thought of that, but I can wear skinny jeans, really tight ones, with no tucking. Nothing shows. I could probably wear a bikini. With enough time on HRT, this should happen. I think?
You're lucky. I never looked right, even with super tight tucking. Some jeans I've got even show residual post-op swelling from srs!
OK so what are we calling Orgasms? I have never been able to have "manly" orgasms cause the danrn'ed thing will just not stay up that long if at all. Girls laughed at me and some guys loved me and it would take a while to even get it a little hard and then it was like, "If not now then never" and kind of like a rabbit. Fast and quick and then debatable. I faked more orgasms than a cis girl. The tounge though never let me down though. With girls an hour or two, with guys, well I just ain't gonna' say. Even laughed at, no complaints from either or. I must really be screwed up now that I think about it. Crap I ain't never had anything but lesbian sex or girl sex in the place I won't say and then I had the "O" with a little help from the hand. Now I guess the dysporia is kicking in. :-\
I guess I'm just abnormal though. So it really never has been a big deal to me.
LOL, I never really enjoyed sex anyway. I wouldn't miss it.
I would like the female version though.
HE!! YA! No hesitation at all.
Yes, without a doubt. I have only anal sex now.
Yep. So much more to life than sex.
IMHO... and YMMV.
Quote from: jillayne on August 26, 2014, 07:32:41 PM
Yes, without a doubt. I have only anal sex now.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi60.tinypic.com%2F2ak0aqd.jpg&hash=dfceffe8c02a8b32bb769937835855d2114fffd6)
That's would be like owning a Ferrari that tops out at 40 MPH, if that makes any sense. Whatever happens to me physically down there is worth it to complete the total package. Of course, I'd like to keep my ground shaking, tremor causing, mind numbing orgasms if at all possible. :icon_dance:
Quote from: Christine Eryn on August 26, 2014, 08:39:37 PM
That's would be like owning a Ferrari that tops out at 40 MPH, if that makes any sense. Whatever happens to me physically down there is worth it to complete the total package. Of course, I'd like to keep my ground shaking, tremor causing, mind numbing orgasms if at all possible. :icon_dance:
I'd like to subscribe to your newsletter. How do I achieve a
"ground shaking, tremor causing, mind numbing orgasm" too? Any secrets of the M2F kind to share?
Might it require a swing set? (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi60.tinypic.com%2F120jvwk.jpg&hash=3e24e8c5c1638ae6aec0cc84bbfdb22f381298a8)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi61.tinypic.com%2F2sbs4sn.jpg&hash=899e20fd3a9a72484637a3445cd8f661f46c9673)
No one need lose their ability to orgasm... The genitals are but a stimulus (pleasure) receptor but it is the "brain" that both causes and experiences orgasm.
This is why paraplegics can achieve orgasm by having by having their elbows rubbed.
Once you truly accept and learn this truth..."nothing" can keep you from achieving orgasm...and nothing can make you orgasm harder than what you want to.
Sort of gives a whole new meaning to the term "sex and chocolate" doesn't it?
Quote from: Angelia_Michelle on August 26, 2014, 09:46:11 PM
No one need lose their ability to orgasm... The genitals are but a stimulus (pleasure) receptor but it is the "brain" that both causes and experiences orgasm.
This is why paraplegics can achieve orgasm by having by having their elbows rubbed.
Once you truly accept and learn this truth..."nothing" can keep you from achieving orgasm...and nothing can make you orgasm harder than what you want to.
Sort of gives a whole new meaning to the term "sex and chocolate" doesn't it?
I had a minor orgasm once just from eating dark chocolate.
Quote from: Jill F on August 26, 2014, 09:49:11 PM
I had a minor orgasm once just from eating dark chocolate.
Yes, I've experienced the same thing from biting into a cupcake from a bakery where you could just "feel" the love they'd put into their baking. It was an extraordinary experience...
it's half and half. on one hand, it's not critical to me, on the other hand, it's nice to have. main thing for me is that as long as i'm able to show my love for my future spouse and as long as they are happy with me as myself, i'm going to be happy with my life.
Quote from: Evelyn K on August 26, 2014, 09:15:49 PM
I'd like to subscribe to your newsletter. How do I achieve a "ground shaking, tremor causing, mind numbing orgasm" too? Any secrets of the M2F kind to share?
Might it require a swing set? (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi60.tinypic.com%2F120jvwk.jpg&hash=3e24e8c5c1638ae6aec0cc84bbfdb22f381298a8)
I like swings, but I wouldn't want anyone misinterpreting possible thoughts about 'getting off in a playground'! :P
Another important difference in my 'orgasmic development' I think was that as a male I focused so much on 'holding back'. There's so much pressure put on men to 'perform' and 'last long'. I'd heard that masturbating quickly would condition a quick end and I got paranoid that I'd just end up being a let down to women. I was also virtually in-orgasmic as a male and had to work hard at drawing out the experience long-enough to get any sort of rewarding sensations out of it.
Now that I've changed focus I've learned how to ignore and restrict my male-type responses better without so much conscious effort and I'm able to relax and just immerse myself fully in responding to the right kinds of stimulation. Most times now when I'm masturbating in some form I'm not ejaculating at all which makes the whole situation less stressful and I don't have to worry about containing or making a mess. Every time I've had spontaneous orgasms now it has been fully clothed and without any physical touch. This is a true joy and completely freeing.
The simple fact is I now have no hang-ups about having an orgasm as quickly as I can and whenever I want. It feels fully natural as compared to how it went before with so much going through my mind that distracted from success. My learning began somewhat by accident but it taught me what my body was capable of and how to 'go with the flow'. I'm pretty certain that HRT is now helping this progression but the change began entirely in the mind. It's a bit tough to put all of this into words and guidance but I can certainly say I'm now part of the "ground shaking, tremor causing, mind numbing orgasm" club!
I actually told my SRS doctors that I cared more about looks than feel. So being that I ended up nicely sensate after Pichet's work, the hypothetical question is a little silly.
Quote from: Evelyn K on August 26, 2014, 09:15:49 PM
I'd like to subscribe to your newsletter. How do I achieve a "ground shaking, tremor causing, mind numbing orgasm" too? Any secrets of the M2F kind to share?
Might it require a swing set? (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi60.tinypic.com%2F120jvwk.jpg&hash=3e24e8c5c1638ae6aec0cc84bbfdb22f381298a8)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi61.tinypic.com%2F2sbs4sn.jpg&hash=899e20fd3a9a72484637a3445cd8f661f46c9673)
Well, I do write science fiction and have written poems for years. I guess I could do a steamy romance novel or "how to" book, one with popups and illustrations. :icon_paper:
Ideally I would like to be able to have orgasms...but right know all I want is for the erections to go away, male orgasm offers me very little pleasure and really the whole package is more a source of frustration. In a way I wish I did not have to worry about orgasms any more, or at least for now. Maybe later I could explore that aspect of my life once my transition is more advanced
Well, at the time I chose to transition, my dysphoria was so bad I could barely orgasm anyway. I had made a promise to myself that when the potential rewards out-weighed the potential risks that I would double up on my efforts to get treatment and begin transitioning and that's what I did.
To my pleasant surprise, all this time on HRT and both my fiance and I notice a definite improvement in my sexual response even if I still don't enjoy any time I have to touch my genitals.
Now I'm looking at surgery... I have to say from where I stand now, if I could orgasm post-op and had no major complications, having a vagina would definitely be an improvement, but if I lost the ability to orgasm completely or ended up with severe complications, then I'd definitely regret it. I can't see how I would be displeased unless something went wrong and it's only the prospect of something going wrong that stops me...
...for now. There may come a day when the rewards outweigh the risks, and I take the chance just like I did with every other stage of my transition.
Yes I would still transition. The ability to orgasm was never even a factor in the decision; it was literally a matter of such sustained, lifelong, crippling depression it boiled down to transition or killing myself. That said, the whole orgasm thing was irrelevant for me, given I've been so painfully dysphoric about that body part my ENTIRE life I could never bring myself to touch it or allow anyone else to for that matter.
I would tell them to ->-bleeped-<- off and find a way to orgasm while transitioning.....and it is ->-bleeped-<-ing great!
I certainly would still transition.
But...although my ability to have those nasty male style orgasms are gone.....I now get to enjoy the female type....and those are PRICELESS.
Hope I still get to enjoy those after surgery, but I would even risk THOSE to be complete.
This is somewhat of a non-issue for me, so were I ever fortunate enough to be in a position to undergo SRS, orgasm would be largely irrelevant.
Although afterwards I might get a tattoo, just below my navel, saying something along the lines of: Abandon all hope, ye who enter here, with a little downward pointing arrow. :)
Going into my whole transition i was led to believe that i would not be able to orgasm ....and i still went through with it... THANK GOD! i still can ... and whew!!! its amazing. better then pre op orgasm for me
If I cannot no problem if I can I guess all the better that is not why I want to do it
Quote from: Sephirah on August 29, 2014, 05:29:02 PM
This is somewhat of a non-issue for me, so were I ever fortunate enough to be in a position to undergo SRS, orgasm would be largely irrelevant.
Although afterwards I might get a tattoo, just below my navel, saying something along the lines of: Abandon all hope, ye who enter here, with a little downward pointing arrow. :)
;D I want a tramp stamp. Just below my naval if I wanted to put a tat there it would be something like,"Welcome to Heaven and then I'm gonna' take you to Hell and back." Can't really say "Welcome to the Jungle" though. :embarrassed: