Susan's Place Transgender Resources

News and Events => People news => Topic started by: skin on November 22, 2014, 11:20:11 AM

Title: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: skin on November 22, 2014, 11:20:11 AM
Steve Rothaus, Miami Herald
November 21, 2014

Jennifer Gable, an Idaho customer service coordinator for Wells Fargo, died suddenly Oct. 9 on the job at age 32. An aneurysm, according to stunned friends.

Just as shocking, they say, when they went to Gable's funeral in Twin Falls, Idaho, and saw her in an open casket — hair cut short, dressed in a suit and presented as a man.

"I am disgusted," Stacy Dee Hudson posted on Facebook. "A great and dear friend's mom went to the funeral today. It was not closed casket. They cut her hair, suit on. How can they bury her as geoff when she legally changed her name. So very sad. Jen you will be missed and people who know you know that you are at peace."

...

Stabler says Gable's death "stresses the importance of having a will."

"She had done what she needed to do legally to be seen as her authentic self. Her father erased her identity either though ignorance or arrogance," Stabler said. "But who knows what the parent was going through?"

Read more here: http://www.miamiherald.com/news/local/community/gay-south-florida/article4055600.html (http://www.miamiherald.com/news/local/community/gay-south-florida/article4055600.html)
Title: Re: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: PinkCloud on November 22, 2014, 12:33:46 PM
Sounds like some desperate parents resisting change.

Maybe it is a good idea to write a will while still alive, and write in it how you want to be dressed, before the earthlings will decide for you. Sad story though...
Title: Re: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: gennee on November 22, 2014, 02:38:34 PM
Pretty sad if you ask me. To me, Jennifer's parents really did not show any respect for their transgender daughter as the person she really was.


:(
Title: Re: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: AngieFerg on November 22, 2014, 10:08:41 PM
My parents will and would do the exact same thing to me. This is a worry that I have had. I plan to make arrangements where that will not be possible for me. Although I have changed things legally I know my deeply ashamed parents would have me buried as a man. This is sad to see.
Title: Re: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: Beverly on November 23, 2014, 11:20:27 AM
I am f***** furious. It is beyond sick.

What is it with religious people? Whatever happened to the principles of love and respect that they are supposed to embrace?

Religion should be reclassified as anti-social behaviour. Fundamentalist religion should have an entry in the DSM under "Mental disease - desire to inflict harm on others".

The sooner humanity grows out of the infantile need for a "Daddy in the sky" the happier we will all be.
Title: Re: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: MelissaAnn on November 23, 2014, 11:44:23 AM
This is absolutely horrifying. It bothers me that the parents, especially the father did not have enough respect for her to lay her to rest as she was. He definitely has issues and cannot accept the fact that he had a daughter, instead of a son. But what bothers me more is what was said on the death certificate as the death certificate says Geoff(a.k.a. Jennifer) is way out of line to me because she had her name legally changed and the corner should of listed it as such. In my opinion, this is outrageous in the corner should be fired.
Title: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: ImagineKate on November 24, 2014, 02:30:30 PM
I saw this on Laverne Cox's Facebook. Makes me sick to my stomach. This should be a hate crime.

Girls and guys, write in your will right now your final wishes. In fact write a living will too in case you are ever hospitalized and terminally ill. Get a good attorney. Disinherit people who don't respect your wishes.
Title: Sad story. Family mistreatment after death.
Post by: Paige on November 24, 2014, 06:22:04 PM
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/11/24/jennifer-gable-transgender_n_6212900.html

This quote from comment section of this article says it all. 

"Unfortunately, this is a sad reminder for all LGBTQ people to get a Health Care Power of Attorney and Will to protect your interests and wishes (and your partner's) even if you're healthy."

Beware of the comment section though, there's too much hate.

Take care,
Paige :)
Title: Re: Sad story. Family mistreatment after death.
Post by: suzifrommd on November 24, 2014, 07:04:02 PM
Another story about this woman was posted in https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,178287.0.html (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,178287.0.html).
Title: Re: Sad story. Family mistreatment after death.
Post by: XiaoMei on November 24, 2014, 07:18:12 PM
I read a few of the comments. It's like people can't tell between "Gender" and "Sex". We need more education in this world...


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Title: Re: Sad story. Family mistreatment after death.
Post by: Jessica Merriman on November 24, 2014, 07:24:36 PM
I already have legal paperwork signed stating I will be buried under my transition name and with female presentation. No one can alter it now or violate the law and pay penalties to a designated charity of my choice. Pre purchasing your funeral and headstone with inscription (no death date of course) based on gender preference is a very smart move if you worry about this as well. 
Title: Re: Sad story. Family mistreatment after death.
Post by: Jill F on November 24, 2014, 07:52:09 PM
I would so haunt everyone who was responsible for that travesty from beyond the grave.

So help me, if I die before I get SRS, I am going to need it done post-mortem.  I am not to be buried with that thing.
Title: Re: Sad story. Family mistreatment after death.
Post by: XiaoMei on November 25, 2014, 12:31:32 AM
I always thought about doing something to have my own funeral paid for with my money. But I never considered that my wishes could be twisted. When I get the change I'd like to be buried as a girl/woman, not a "man".


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Title: Re: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: Wynternight on November 25, 2014, 10:46:06 AM
Hi all, I merged the two threads on this sad story together.
Title: Re: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: TheQuestion on November 25, 2014, 11:35:02 AM
That's pretty sick.  I was thinking of killing myself a few months back and I'd told a few relatives that I wanted to be cremated.  I haven't even started HRT and even I don't want to be buried in a suit.  This is truly disturbing...
Title: Re: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: Devlyn on November 25, 2014, 11:37:55 AM
Without a will, all decisions are going to be made by someone else. What you said, what you wanted, what you liked to be called, all become moot points if you haven't stated your wishes on a legally binding document.
Title: Re: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: kira21 ♡♡♡ on November 25, 2014, 12:28:38 PM
I know my parents would be the same.  I think about my death quite frequently,  for obvious reasons,  and I wouldn't even want my parents there. Time to write a will I suppose!
Title: Re: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: m1anderson on November 25, 2014, 01:19:25 PM
The article stated that she was raised by her maternal Grandparents; obviously not accepting. Raise up and heed the wisdom that your wishes MUST be followed by creating a legal document stating your needs.
Title: Re: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: Beth Andrea on November 25, 2014, 01:42:29 PM
So sad. RIP Jen.

:(
Title: Re: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: TheDane on November 26, 2014, 12:16:27 AM
This just made me so sad. One of my biggest fears is, how will people remember me? (Right after, will people remember me?) So this is just so sad.
Title: Re: Sad story. Family mistreatment after death.
Post by: ImagineKate on November 26, 2014, 08:18:51 AM
Quote from: Jessica Merriman on November 24, 2014, 07:24:36 PM
I already have legal paperwork signed stating I will be buried under my transition name and with female presentation. No one can alter it now or violate the law and pay penalties to a designated charity of my choice. Pre purchasing your funeral and headstone with inscription (no death date of course) based on gender preference is a very smart move if you worry about this as well.

Good idea. But I will probably be cremated, but I know there is a small stone in a park they put. Maybe I can get one of those.
Title: Re: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: LordKAT on November 26, 2014, 03:05:18 PM
My mother cheated and bought a headstone for me, with the wrong name on it, of course.  She didn't ask me or tell me about it. My sister let it slip.


Good thing I'm not catholic, make it harder to be buried in a catholic cemetary.
Title: Re: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: TheDane on November 26, 2014, 03:58:26 PM
Quote from: LordKAT on November 26, 2014, 03:05:18 PM
My mother cheated and bought a headstone for me, with the wrong name on it, of course.  She didn't ask me or tell me about it. My sister let it slip.


Good thing I'm not catholic, make it harder to be buried in a catholic cemetary.

Can I just say, it's a bit creepy that you mother has bought you a headstone. Assuming one is not terminally ill, one's mother should not be planning one's funeral.
Title: Re: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: Jill F on November 26, 2014, 04:14:21 PM
Quote from: LordKAT on November 26, 2014, 03:05:18 PM
My mother cheated and bought a headstone for me, with the wrong name on it, of course.  She didn't ask me or tell me about it. My sister let it slip.

Wow, mother of the year award here.  UGH!  So sorry.

Hugs,
Jill
Title: Re: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: LordKAT on November 27, 2014, 02:35:55 AM
Quote from: TheDane on November 26, 2014, 03:58:26 PM
Can I just say, it's a bit creepy that you mother has bought you a headstone. Assuming one is not terminally ill, one's mother should not be planning one's funeral.


Not creepy if you knew the background of her decision.  In an odd way, sensible even.
Title: Re: Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man
Post by: LordKAT on November 27, 2014, 02:37:06 AM
Agreed Jill. Someday she will maybe figure it out, but I'm not holding my breath.