Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I'm sure this question has been asked before in one form or another. Seeing the subject of likes and dislikes of certain attractions in regards to how there are different reactions depending on gender I thought I'd put up a poll of our little community.

I know, I know, the answer I'm going to give is the eye-rolling kind. Sorry, heads-up sorry .

I've explored my sexuality without trying to, and what unfolded before me was almost a bit annoying. You think in one instant you can corner it well, put a name to it, but something ends up putting you on this roller coaster of uncertainty. Again. Because that never got old in the first place.

I can't say I'm one or the other. I've acted on male attraction, never on female attraction - I just know that it's there. Maybe because it feels less threatening, maybe more intimate and kind. I'm not sure, I haven't done anything about it yet. I still feel like I would lean towards male, but I can never be sure!

Edit: I clicked the last one, because I have no freaking clue. Bleh.

When I was younger I identified as bisexual, but I've since discovered that I am far more a romantic asexual.  I like close companionship, intimacy and cuddling, but I really don't care much for sex.

I said bisexual. I find women more attractive, but when it comes to sex and relationships I want a man.

I learned early on that it was males, but didn't realize it was males even before that.
Mariah

I can be romantically attracted to anyone of any gender...but when it boils right down to it, I'm only sexually attracted to women. Like, there are several of my guy friends that I have or have had a crush on, but ultimately, I wouldn't even pursue that, because sex eventually comes into play, and I just...couldn't. And I wouldn't want to hurt them like that.

I'm into masculinity. I just didn't even consider dating guys until I accepted that I was trans and that it was silly to try to define myself as heterosexual or homosexual or whatever. I know it's silly, but I didn't want to be trans or gay, so I dated butch women. Now that I'm pretty far into transition, and not as afraid of labels, I'm into men and butch women. Which I guess constitutes bisexuality kinda sorta...


     Hugs,
- Katie
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Men.

Or f2m (never did it though); but my gawd.. he must be 5'10 at least.

Im a straight woman... no longer consider myself as gay.

dudes for sure although I would say its harder being romantically into guys cause most guys aren't as deep or romantic as me... :-\

For me romance is about an individual and gender is irrelevant.  It is about sensuality and desire.  Or, all of the above works too.  I feel fortunate to be in a loving and currently exclusive LT relationship.  Dating would feel like starting over in 1st grade.  And then, who doesn't love a puppy or kitten? :D

Chicks.

While I sometimes get the sense that trans lesbians might be, sadly, a bit trans excluding, I am extremely attracted to both cis women and trans women, to the point that there are moments I find trans women even more attractive.  So yeah, I'm a lesbian and open to all women, but I find trans women the most alluring.

Quote from: Ever on May 26, 2015, 02:19:51 AM
While I sometimes get the sense that trans lesbians might be, sadly, a bit trans excluding, I am extremely attracted to both cis women and trans women, to the point that there are moments I find trans women even more attractive.  So yeah, I'm a lesbian and open to all women, but I find trans women the most alluring.

I get the same feeling at times too and have wondered about that....even though ive always only liked men I always mean both cis and trans men....not all trans men and not all cis men... even though I have always liked "male" anatomy (I know sounds cissexist) but I don't think being with a preop or non op trans guy would be bad even if I wasn't really attracted to that one area...Anyways ya I think its transphobic to say you only like (cis girls/guys) I may make a post about this right now ;)

Quote from: Tessa James on May 26, 2015, 01:58:59 AM
For me romance is about an individual and gender is irrelevant.  It is about sensuality and desire.  Or, all of the above works too.  I feel fortunate to be in a loving and currently exclusive LT relationship.  Dating would feel like starting over in 1st grade.  And then, who doesn't love a puppy or kitten? :D

Cats, of course! 

"CATS... CATS ARE NICE"

women 100%  I just cant stand most the men around me behave. most of the men in my life seem like giant man childs

hmm, I only have FWBs because relationships are to messy for me. if anything goes further than that than i'm gone. yea I know, its wrong if me but I just can't get attached without feeling like imma get hurt, so I guess both but I'm claiming asexuality lol

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Romantically I am pan, no questions.

Sexually I find being with a guy the least GD triggering.

for now!

I generally hate putting labels on things, but if I'm honest with myself, I'm mostly attracted to femme lesbians and femme/femme relationships are what I'm most comfortable with.  Alpha male type personalities are a complete turn off for me.  Realistically though, I'm open to "falling" for anyone, and some of my better relationships have been with people I never would have chosen on my own.  Technically, I guess that makes me pan, but since it's so situational, I don't really feel comfortable identifying myself that way.

I honestly don't know.

There is close to zero attraction to women sexually for me, but with men it really depends.

I love a man in uniform, LE or military. Some of the NJ state troopers today are just, well let's say I wouldn't mind if one of them decided to pull me over hehe.

But being with a guy scares me, knowing how they think based on my own experiences.

I'm attracted to the ladies but have entertained the idea of being with a guy.

I used to think that I was only attracted to women but then as I got further into transition I started noticing that there are some REALLY cute guys out there :)

So I guess that i'm attracted to "people" - especially anyone that connects with me emotionally and can hold an intelligent conversation about anything and everything. Their body configuration doesn't matter that much to me.

I don't know if it's Aspergers speaking or what, but I'm just done with sexual involvement. I do not want to have sex, and quite frankly it grosses me out being that close to someone of either gender. Hugging is awkward enough thank you, I do not need the weirdness of getting undressed to boot. Even romantically you have to get to know me extremely well for me to be receptive to any ques. So yea, put me down as asexual with a mild preference toward women because they seem to understand me a bit better.

As far as dating I would definitely say women with slight preferences towards other trans women. I can myself dating a trans man too, but I never think of cis men in romantic ways. I am sexually attracted to any gender.

Most often I am attracted to cis girls but if I am attracted to a trans girl I tend to be really attracted to her.

Quote from: amber roskamp on May 26, 2015, 10:40:58 AM
As far as dating I would definitely say women with slight preferences towards other trans women. I can myself dating a trans man too, but I never think of cis men in romantic ways. I am sexually attracted to any gender.

Most often I am attracted to cis girls but if I am attracted to a trans girl I tend to be really attracted to her.

eep, your just like me xD I tend to get highly attached.
after my ex girlfriend is giving me the run around, I can't see myself with anyone which is sad

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I'm not really attracted to any gender romantically. I learned my lesson years ago....

It turns out that I'm bisexual, only recently discovered it, though.

Quote from: Eva Marie on May 26, 2015, 08:51:03 AM
I used to think that I was only attracted to women but then as I got further into transition I started noticing that there are some REALLY cute guys out there :)

So I guess that i'm attracted to "people" - especially anyone that connects with me emotionally and can hold an intelligent conversation about anything and everything. Their body configuration doesn't matter that much to me.

^This^

What's between one's ears is important to me, not what's between one's legs.

The first 30 years of my life I was so messed up that sex was the last thing I wanted to get involved in. Most of the rest of my live I had companionship with my roommate and as sex didn't enter in to it,  I didn't desire a sexual partner. Just now thinking about it for the first time, I guess I can see myself in either relationship and enjoying it but I don't have the drive to be in a sexual relationship. I guess I can continue to use the term Asexual. The question for me should be how many people around age 60 want to take a 63 year amateur to bed with them when there are so many others out there that are much more skilled at the art of love making.

MEN!!

I've always been attracted to men and that feeling has increased tenfold since starting on E.
Just recently it seems that every other man I meet sets my senses on fire, I just catch a whiff of them and. . . . dammit I need a cold shower again!!
I think I've been a singleton for too long

Quote from: Jayne on May 26, 2015, 02:40:13 PM
MEN!!

I've always been attracted to men and that feeling has increased tenfold since starting on E.
Just recently it seems that every other man I meet sets my senses on fire, I just catch a whiff of them and. . . . dammit I need a cold shower again!!
I think I've been a singleton for too long

Estrogen does the same thing to me. I've always been bi, but the longer I'm on estrogen the sweeter men look.

Quote from: stephaniec on May 26, 2015, 04:01:16 PM
Estrogen does the same thing to me. I've always been bi, but the longer I'm on estrogen the sweeter men look.

. . . . and smell. . . . and feel. . . . . and taste. . . . dammit I need another ice cold shower!! Damn this topic!!!!!

I like the idea of being with someone because of their heart, but am still confused about what I really want.

I know I don't want to be the 'man' in the relationship, but I do find myself more attracted physically to feminine people.

Being pre everything though, I feel like everything, especially love and sex, are on hold. Love just isn't really an option for me right now, not that I don't want it, I'm actually extremely lonely and love starved.

It's just, I have found it impossible to find someone else who would want to be with me at this stage. I look like a guy, but want to be a girl, and plan on becoming one.

I just have no idea how to find someone who would want that, or be ok with it :/

Quote from: Dena on May 26, 2015, 01:55:33 PM
The first 30 years of my life I was so messed up that sex was the last thing I wanted to get involved in. Most of the rest of my live I had companionship with my roommate and as sex didn't enter in to it,  I didn't desire a sexual partner. Just now thinking about it for the first time, I guess I can see myself in either relationship and enjoying it but I don't have the drive to be in a sexual relationship. I guess I can continue to use the term Asexual. The question for me should be how many people around age 60 want to take a 63 year amateur to bed with them when there are so many others out there that are much more skilled at the art of love making.

I'm 53, I am an amateur as you described,  and I just found someone who is doing exactly that with me. He's kind, patient, and we go at my pace. Put the shoe on the other foot for a minute. If you met someone you were interested in, and you were the pro rather than the amateur, would you decide that there was no chance of a relationship? I think at our age most people have developed a lot of patience and understanding. There's someone for everyone, I believe that. You just have to find them, and more often than not, fate throws people together. Go out there and have fun!

Hugs, Devlyn

Quote from: Teela Renee on May 26, 2015, 06:14:27 AM
women 100%  I just cant stand most the men around me behave. most of the men in my life seem like giant man childs

LOL Teela true..
But for me its Men men men men.. for now.. I like men but have never been with one.  I really want to find a guy but could take time.. a long time.. I will admit up front I am trans.. no secrets so I am sure I will get rejected  a lot.. but I want an open and real relationship.
Oh please god help me find the right one... one day.. after GRS of course.!!
Dodie

Quote from: Devlyn Marie on May 26, 2015, 05:16:02 PM
I'm 53, I am an amateur as you described,  and I just found someone who is doing exactly that with me. He's kind, patient, and we go at my pace. Put the shoe on the other foot for a minute. If you met someone you were interested in, and you were the pro rather than the amateur, would you decide that there was no chance of a relationship? I think at our age most people have developed a lot of patience and understanding. There's someone for everyone, I believe that. You just have to find them, and more often than not, fate throws people together. Go out there and have fun!

Hugs, Devlyn

My people and social skills are pretty messed up as well. People might have called me shy when I was young but by the time I hit grade school the girls went their way and I didn't have any interest in sports. The only friends I had were the outcast and when puberty hit that was pretty much the end of it until about age 28 and I found the correct treatment program. Even after surgery I remained uncomfortable in new social environments but my roommate somewhat broke me of that by doing portable vending. Some places I had to deal with 3000 to 4000 people walking through our trailer in a ten day period. It helped but I still had my comfort zone of the trailer and I still have to force my self to meet a new person. To think about going after somebody for a sexual relationship, that is way out of my comfort zone and while I want to get back in the world after the death of my roommate, I am not sure what i want is a sexual relationship. I know now I want to set out in a new direction and make some changes in my life but I am not sure what those changes should be. All of you are dealing with an issue that few people have where I am dealing with some that's pretty common. Is that and indication I have become normal. Oh my god, I don't want to be normal.

Quote from: stephaniec on May 25, 2015, 10:27:25 PM
I'm sure this question has been asked before in one form or another. Seeing the subject of likes and dislikes of certain attractions in regards to how there are different reactions depending on gender I thought I'd put up a poll of our little community.

Men -- mainly because they make me feel more effeminate than would a woman.

men 100%

i've heard stories of people's sexuality changing on hrt though @_@

Quote from: .Christy on May 26, 2015, 10:39:56 PM
men 100%

i've heard stories of people's sexuality changing on hrt though @_@

When I first came out I readily identified as bi. I was with a woman for 8yrs & for the first few years I loved her & worshipped the ground she walked on, however I never really enjoyed what went on in the bedroom.
After we split I did some serious soul searching & concluded that i'd become attracted to the male side of her personality, she took on the "traditional" male roles in the relationship & I was more than happy to let her.
It wasn't until a woman I knew who was very feminine said she was hoping that i'd be her first lesbian encounter after my transition that I had to re-examine my sexuality as even pre hrt I recoiled at the thought.

I'll never rule out the idea of being in a relationship with a woman as it has happened once before but I feel that it's highly unlikely & should it happen then I think the relationship would be more a meeting of minds than a meeting of other parts.

I'm bisexual (trans* included). Romantically, I prefer femininity, but I could possibly see myself in a relationship with a more feminine male. Sexually, I'm more into guys right now, but I don't think I would really consider a having a long term relationship with a really masculine guy.

I put bisexual because I'm assuming that was the option for "both"?

Lately it's been more in the male department. Sorry chica's, but like the last 30 some years I've been with women sexually, I'm feeling let down in the excitement and creativity department in the bedroom. Media always talks about how men should learn find the 'softer side' of themselves, but FFS from my perspective I think a lot of women need to start buying power tools and wearing construction boots.

A guy is like a puppy you can train and that's super excited with a few choice commands that'll do anything to please you, while the women have essentially treated me like a living vibrator. Want the same thing, the same time, get rid of their stress, and let em go to sleep afterwards. I know it's weird. All the women I'm with act like men... just get me off so I can goto sleep! GRRR!! What the hell happened to 2-4 hour sex bouts and having multiple orgasms in a night?  :-\

I'm pansexual, I like pans and other kitchen gadgets.

In all seriousness, I am pan, which I don't see the same as bi since bisexuality limits things to the gender binary. I am open to a relationship with anyone so long as the attraction and connection at a deeper, soul-level like place is there.

Personally, I like robots. Don't knock it until you've welded it...

Ok, fine. I'm bi, currently in an open relationship with another MTF trans girl.

I'm attracted to women (trans included). I find men to be lacking both emotionally and physically.

Growing up this was always a question I asked myself, and to this day...still ask myself! :P There's always been a strong romantic attraction to women (trans women included  :D), but I never really questioned who I was attracted to until just recently. I think being on hormones has increased my emotional vulnerability and definitely strengthened my potential romantic attraction to women... and odd enough to me, my new found ability to now romanticize the idea of having feelings for men. Though elementary, it is something I welcome with an open mind...sweet! :laugh:

I see men much differently than before HRT ... notice things that I think are attractive, but I am still physically attracted to women.

Man, especially the hot one  ;D

I'm at about 90% women, 10% men.

As I am still getting my mind set and figuring out what kinda girly I am, I know I'm a down to earth country girl at heart, which kinda opened me to men in a small slight push as of recent. But I still have the hots and love and affection that I have for the one person who I really fell in love with, but she's the type that would like more adventures, more risks, more everything that I'm not entirely fond of. Which other than some rocky bits in our relationship, we ended up splitting back in the end of February.

Kate ♥

I am only attracted to men, masculinity, and I don't think this will change on HRT, which I am on already. I never got why most trans women like women when most women like men, definitely an interesting topic. However,  I would be open to dating a FTM. He is a man after all.

Quote from: Tiffanie on May 31, 2015, 12:38:13 AM
I see men much differently than before HRT ... notice things that I think are attractive, but I am still physically attracted to women.

i have been married over 20 years and it was always women.  still think im strait, but i have started having dreams about guys i know!  been on hrt for over 18mo and a few months ago i started having orgasmic dreams about these guys.  i hate to admit it, but it felt great and i could remember it when i woke.  i never had thoughts about guys before, and doubt i ever will even if my wife dumped me (probably if she found this out!)  i was ashamed at first and never talked about it, but after 40 years as a male, my orgasms are screaming and controlled as a female.  yet when i had testosterone, i just wanted to have sex because it was a 1 minute urge and it was over til next urge:(
now as a woman, i can enjoy sex more!  i wish i could explain this more to my male friends, but they grab their junk acting in pain when i try to explain it!  getting rid of that male urge made things more enjoyable.  i just wish this was known years ago!
did anyone else find this to be the case to about male sex dreams while never having the encounter?  i guess im bi, yet i may never get to enjoy a real male experience.  does that sound right.  i would think its the preferences in your head, not actual experience? 
night all;) j

Women, 100%. I had a "guy crazy" phase but that ended when I realized I was only with them for validation of my identity.

Definitely men. I love really tall( at least 6"5) manly studs.
Huge hands, huge feet, huge penis, huge testicles.

>:-)

For sure I can say women. Though lately I've been bi-curious.