Seeing someone posting their good experience of life after transition inspired me to ask this question.
What are some of the main things you look forward to after transition and living your life as your true gender?
I look forward as being taken more seriously and respected as a male. I look forward to someday to having more physical strength and body building to help that along. Work a job as a male instead of a female and male bonding, as well as having an emotional attachment to my body I don't have as a female and sure I'll have as a male.
Being able to quit my job and move. It's not at all what I want to do or where I want to be living, but I have really good health insurance that is covering my last few surgeries so I feel obligated to stay at least until those are finished.
I can only tell you what my experience has been. I'll be coming up on my thirtieth year since GRS within the year. It took me a few years to get my act together and I jumped into a relationship for which I was ill prepared. But many people do that from the outset, not just us. I had a good career. I loved most of the jobs I had. My dysphoria disappeared once my history was lost in my work place. I've certainly had a different outlook on life than everyone else I know. I feel like I've lived two lifetimes... and since my hubby left me, I'm starting a third.
For the most part, my life has been exceptionally dull. I've done a lot of things that not many would consider but even at that, I've not raised too many eyebrows. I've had a good life and I'm proud for my accomplishments. I'm proud that I had the means to support my children through the years. I'm proud of who I am and the things I stand for.
So... overall, I'm content. And that is what you might be headed for. There are no guarantees to be sure, but I'm overly joyed that I did not remain in that role defined by others for me. I'm sure I would not be alive today.
Quote from: FTMax on April 04, 2016, 06:50:53 PM
Being able to quit my job and move. It's not at all what I want to do or where I want to be living, but I have really good health insurance that is covering my last few surgeries so I feel obligated to stay at least until those are finished.
Where are you moving to?
Quote from: Cindi Jones on April 04, 2016, 07:01:52 PM
I can only tell you what my experience has been. I'll be coming up on my thirtieth year since GRS within the year. It took me a few years to get my act together and I jumped into a relationship for which I was ill prepared. But many people do that from the outset, not just us. I had a good career. I loved most of the jobs I had. My dysphoria disappeared once my history was lost in my work place. I've certainly had a different outlook on life than everyone else I know. I feel like I've lived two lifetimes... and since my hubby left me, I'm starting a third.
For the most part, my life has been exceptionally dull. I've done a lot of things that not many would consider but even at that, I've not raised too many eyebrows. I've had a good life and I'm proud for my accomplishments. I'm proud that I had the means to support my children through the years. I'm proud of who I am and the things I stand for.
So... overall, I'm content. And that is what you might be headed for. There are no guarantees to be sure, but I'm overly joyed that I did not remain in that role defined by others for me. I'm sure I would not be alive today.
That's inspirational.
Quote from: alienbodybuilder on April 05, 2016, 06:16:42 AM
Quote from: FTMax on April 04, 2016, 06:50:53 PM
Being able to quit my job and move. It's not at all what I want to do or where I want to be living, but I have really good health insurance that is covering my last few surgeries so I feel obligated to stay at least until those are finished.
Where are you moving to?
To Canada within the next two years hopefully!
Not waking up each day and just kinda wanting my life to be over already. That would be nice.
Don't even care about what I look like. I just don't want to feel this bad.
I most look forward to having top surgery. To be completely flat and to walk around topless will just be the most amazing experience. I'm still ages away from that happening though :/. Second to that would simply looking 100% undoubtedly masculine/male and to be able to grow some sort of facial hair. That's what keeps me from drowning in a pit of despair and giving up.
Being seen as and treated as a guy by people I encounter.
Having a more masculine physique would be awesome... but I can handle the feminine if I'm not being treated like a woman.
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For me it is a journey that i intend to enjoy more than a destination. I feel like the experiences and improvements thus far have been overwhelmingly positive. One thing i am looking forward to and beginning to experience is more women friends and activities together.
I'm looking forward to leaving this world as an old lady :) my authentic self but maybe about 40-50 yrs in the future.
Quote from: FTMax on April 05, 2016, 08:58:26 AM
Where are you moving to?
To Canada within the next two years hopefully!
Are you going to become a citizen, and are the more accepting of LGBT?
Quote from: T.K.G.W. on April 05, 2016, 10:32:53 AM
Not waking up each day and just kinda wanting my life to be over already. That would be nice.
Don't even care about what I look like. I just don't want to feel this bad.
I understand that feeling, but I try to find little things that keep me going everyday aside from my gender dysphoria. My dysphoria is always on my mind though.
Quote from: alienbodybuilder on April 05, 2016, 02:44:03 PM
Quote from: FTMax on April 05, 2016, 08:58:26 AM
Where are you moving to?
To Canada within the next two years hopefully!
Are you going to become a citizen, and are the more accepting of LGBT?
I would be becoming a citizen by marriage, my girlfriend is Canadian. They are generally much more accepting of LGBT people, but I'm sure it's like anywhere in the US - really depends where you are and who you're talking to.
Quote from: FTMax on April 05, 2016, 02:49:33 PM
Are you going to become a citizen, and are the more accepting of LGBT?
I would be becoming a citizen by marriage, my girlfriend is Canadian. They are generally much more accepting of LGBT people, but I'm sure it's like anywhere in the US - really depends where you are and who you're talking to.
I heard they had some wild weather. You'll have to tell me about the climate and weather once you get there.
I am Canadian. The weather is variable but most parts are definitely colder than much of the US...
We do tend to be more "liberal" (for lack of a better term) and equal rights for LGTBQ folks are legally enshrined... most people, even in rural areas, are pretty used to gays and lesbians and same sex marrive has been legal since 2005. Trans rights are a work in progress. There is currently a transphobic backlash in my province since our provincial government enacted laws protecting trans children... I expect that acceptance is just a matter of time though (and if it's anything like gay marriage acceptance, probably not much time).
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Quote from: arice on April 05, 2016, 03:37:40 PM
I am Canadian. The weather is variable but most parts are definitely colder than much of the US...
We do tend to be more "liberal" (for lack of a better term) and equal rights for LGTBQ folks are legally enshrined... most people, even in rural areas, are pretty used to gays and lesbians and same sex marrive has been legal since 2005. Trans rights are a work in progress. There is currently a transphobic backlash in my province since our provincial government enacted laws protecting trans children... I expect that acceptance is just a matter of time though (and if it's anything like gay marriage acceptance, probably not much time).
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Which province are you in? Perhaps we'll be neighbors :D
Quote from: FTMax on April 05, 2016, 04:56:18 PM
Which province are you in? Perhaps we'll be neighbors :D
Alberta.
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Quote from: arice on April 05, 2016, 05:12:46 PM
Quote from: FTMax on April 05, 2016, 04:56:18 PM
Which province are you in? Perhaps we'll be neighbors :D
Alberta.
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WE WILL BE NEIGHBORS.
Quote from: FTMax on April 05, 2016, 05:34:43 PM
Alberta.
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WE WILL BE NEIGHBORS.
Cool!
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The thing i look forward to the most is just being able to emotonally react and not have to worry about what others think.
Just to enjoy one normal life with a closet full of nice clothes. Oh & men. I so look forward to dating again to fully enjoy a man...Everything really about being female....
I look forward to being able to live in my body how I should be able to - to be able to wear any style of tshirt, to have any style of hair and to be able to live a normal life without worrying about discomfort or misgendering.
Surgery is the last part of my transition so I'll just list what I'm looking forward to when im post op.
let's see in no particular order
- swimming in a bikini, sucks that I have a bikini bod but can't really wear any yet :(
- actually having a sex life
- being able to enjoy showers/bathes and not loathe them anymore
- not having to think twice about what my outfit is due to my downstairs
- wearing dresses/skirts without undies (would help a ton with preventing yeast infections)
Quote from: Lady_Oracle on April 06, 2016, 08:07:55 PM
Surgery is the last part of my transition so I'll just list what I'm looking forward to when im post op.
let's see in no particular order
- swimming in a bikini, sucks that I have a bikini bod but can't really wear any yet :(
- actually having a sex life
- being able to enjoy showers/bathes and not loathe them anymore
- not having to think twice about what my outfit is due to my downstairs
- wearing dresses/skirts without undies (would help a ton with preventing yeast infections)
I can identify with 2& 3. Good luck on your journey!
Quote from: arice on April 05, 2016, 12:21:23 PM
Being seen as and treated as a guy by people I encounter.
Having a more masculine physique would be awesome... but I can handle the feminine if I'm not being treated like a woman.
This is the worst thing. In some cultures, if you come out as trans, you are considered trans, and treated accordingly. In Western cultures, if you come out as trans pre-everything, you are considered "confused". You will continue to be treated as the sex you were assigned at birth. Change your hair, change your clothing, they will now think you are gay, because that's the same thing, right?
I think that HRT is a MIRACLE of modern science. It is AMAZING. I love it. I had so much pain over thinking my body couldn't be changed and it CAN. Yes! Why suffer in the stone age. But ...
Why do people have to treat us this way?
They should acknowledge our identities without physical changes.
They should grasp that there are more than two sexes, with all the requisite attributes lining up in order.
Did you know when Europeans first tried to colonize North America they returned to Europe with stories of "hermaphrodites"? They encountered a culture where a man could have breasts and a woman could have a penis and it blew their tiny little minds. ;D
Quote from: AnxietyDisord3r on April 10, 2016, 10:02:18 AM
This is the worst thing. In some cultures, if you come out as trans, you are considered trans, and treated accordingly. In Western cultures, if you come out as trans pre-everything, you are considered "confused". You will continue to be treated as the sex you were assigned at birth. Change your hair, change your clothing, they will now think you are gay, because that's the same thing, right?
I think that HRT is a MIRACLE of modern science. It is AMAZING. I love it. I had so much pain over thinking my body couldn't be changed and it CAN. Yes! Why suffer in the stone age. But ...
Why do people have to treat us this way?
They should acknowledge our identities without physical changes.
They should grasp that there are more than two sexes, with all the requisite attributes lining up in order.
Did you know when Europeans first tried to colonize North America they returned to Europe with stories of "hermaphrodites"? They encountered a culture where a man could have breasts and a woman could have a penis and it blew their tiny little minds. ;D
I know. I also think some of the "understanding" of gender is individual rather than cultural. My son (now 6) has always had a very "non-western" understanding of gender and sexuality. He has always been confident that he is a boy and that he has a penis... but he never leapt to the conclusion that ALL boys have them. In fact, he was insisting as early as two years old that some boys have them and some don't and that some girls have them and some don't... he is also very insistent that some people are both boys and girls. He has also had a thorough acceptance of lesbian and gay relationships and even polyamory. I would say that it's just because he has grown up around diversity but it is more than that... he just "knows" these things from the first moment he is exposed to it and leaps into other people's conversations to enlighten them... My daughter (4 years old), on the other hand, is more rigid in her understanding of gender expression. She is not intolerant of differences (her best friend is a gender fluid AMAB with lesbian parents) but she is definitely more aware that they are "different".
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Quote from: arice on April 10, 2016, 11:27:38 AM
I know. I also think some of the "understanding" of gender is individual rather than cultural. My son (now 6) has always had a very "non-western" understanding of gender and sexuality. He has always been confident that he is a boy and that he has a penis... but he never leapt to the conclusion that ALL boys have them. In fact, he was insisting as early as two years old that some boys have them and some don't and that some girls have them and some don't... he is also very insistent that some people are both boys and girls. He has also had a thorough acceptance of lesbian and gay relationships and even polyamory. I would say that it's just because he has grown up around diversity but it is more than that... he just "knows" these things from the first moment he is exposed to it and leaps into other people's conversations to enlighten them... My daughter (4 years old), on the other hand, is more rigid in her understanding of gender expression. She is not intolerant of differences (her best friend is a gender fluid AMAB with lesbian parents) but she is definitely more aware that they are "different".
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Those children seem advanced for their age. You have taught them well.
Quote from: alienbodybuilder on April 10, 2016, 08:26:45 PM
Those children seem advanced for their age. You have taught them well.
Only in some ways. :) they also teach me constantly.
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The most important thing are to get healthy after 7 month post. Living with pain and limits. On the other side its necessary to correct all your hormone substitution. It all gpingz crazy after surgery. If you think anything will be change post OP ... No, definitely no. I my case i got hundreds of new problems.
I just want to enjoy life, go on long drives with my Car!
Enjoy the wind and freedom in my hair :3
Marriage-having a wife that will be able to see me physically as a man.
I have no intentions of transitioning at this time in my life. With no proper social support group
and friends who would NOT understand, I only want SRS to make ME Happy!!!
I don't want to transition at this point.
Being able to go out and interact with people as myself would be nice.
Quote from: galaxy on April 10, 2016, 10:53:59 PM
The most important thing are to get healthy after 7 month post. Living with pain and limits. On the other side its necessary to correct all your hormone substitution. It all gpingz crazy after surgery. If you think anything will be change post OP ... No, definitely no. I my case i got hundreds of new problems.
Do you mean that transition caused more medical or emotional problems? Sorry for your distress. Bless you.
I am one of those who see life as ongoing transitions and adaption to change. I don't have a target endpoint and will embrace new ideas until I take the final bow and leave the stage. We are fortunate to have so many opportunities now to address our needed changes.
For many of us there is always a new person that we will "come out" to or with. Getting started with transition took me forever and was still wonderful. How and when it finishes is yet to be determined. I can imagine something highly theatrical, dramatic and definite as well as a quiet ride into the sunset surrounded by those we love. It's a journey.
Tessa,
I also see this as a journey. I expect to learn a lot. I'm excited about having a body that better matches who I am inside, but I'm nervous about social aspects because I'm set in my ways and social stuff is difficult for me.
I honestly can't imagine trying to live stealth. I married a bisexual woman. She has always seen me for who I am. I feel like trying to date monosexual people is more of a minefield, although some monosexual people are attracted to gender rather than sex and aren't put out by the alien bodyparts issue at all.
The things I most look forward to are
-Being the best father I can to my future children and being their male role model in this world
-Walking around in my city as a man and going out to bars and dancing (I really want to get hit on by gay men >:-)
-Having facial hair, a flat chest, and a man butt and staring myself in the mirror
-Playing the sports I grew up playing but having more strength and stamina.. and just being stronger and more energetic overall
-Feeling confident finally having the right body
the list could go on and on :)
Things I look forward
- liking my body and feeling comfortable in it
- just being a guy
- just being treated as a guy
Quote from: freebrady2015 on April 12, 2016, 09:58:48 AM
The things I most look forward to are
-Being the best father I can to my future children and being their male role model in this world
-Walking around in my city as a man and going out to bars and dancing (I really want to get hit on by gay men >:-)
-Having facial hair, a flat chest, and a man butt and staring myself in the mirror
-Playing the sports I grew up playing but having more strength and stamina.. and just being stronger and more energetic overall
-Feeling confident finally having the right body
the list could go on and on :)
Does having a man's butt come with the hormones or surgery? That's another thing that would make me happy is not having a woman's butt.
Hormones redistribute fat, but how much and to where depends on the person. That will effect what you butt looks like. Mind you, so does exercise. A lot of squat lifts and you get a really nice lifters butt. :D
What amazes me is how we're all so different. I mean, that's a good thing. ;D
Quote from: alienbodybuilder on April 12, 2016, 08:39:55 PM
Does having a man's butt come with the hormones or surgery? That's another thing that would make me happy is not having a woman's butt.
It comes from testosterone redistributing fat from the lower body to a more male fat distribution around the belly. Of course, being physically in shape is the big factor. I have I would say the most dysphoria around my lower body so I can't wait for that to change. The sinlge best exercise for a man butt in my opinion is the deadlift in all its variations.
Quote from: freebrady2015 on April 13, 2016, 07:40:37 AM
It comes from testosterone redistributing fat from the lower body to a more male fat distribution around the belly. Of course, being physically in shape is the big factor. I have I would say the most dysphoria around my lower body so I can't wait for that to change. The sinlge best exercise for a man butt in my opinion is the deadlift in all its variations.
Thanks.
Quote from: WorkingOnThomas on April 13, 2016, 02:11:07 AM
Hormones redistribute fat, but how much and to where depends on the person. That will effect what you butt looks like. Mind you, so does exercise. A lot of squat lifts and you get a really nice lifters butt. :D
Thank you. Bless you, Thomas.
I look forward to being 100% happy in my own skin. Being known as Emma and not having to worry about going on a kayak trip down the river in a bikini top and shorty shorts
I look forward to SRS since it will improve the selection of outfits I can use and make me happier with what I look like naked. As for the other things I am more or less living the life I wanted to, I have a job where I socialize with the other women as a peer and I am mostly stealth and I have a wonderful girlfriend who accepts and loves me no matter what the current state of my body is.
As weird as it sounds, manscaping, I want to grow a beard and chest hair and cut it into fancy shapes.
Quote from: Hikari on April 15, 2016, 01:32:40 AM
I look forward to SRS since it will improve the selection of outfits I can use and make me happier with what I look like naked. As for the other things I am more or less living the life I wanted to, I have a job where I socialize with the other women as a peer and I am mostly stealth and I have a wonderful girlfriend who accepts and loves me no matter what the current state of my body is.
Congratulations. You are very blessed.
Quote from: CrazyCatMan on April 15, 2016, 12:52:33 PM
As weird as it sounds, manscaping, I want to grow a beard and chest hair and cut it into fancy shapes.
Yes, I've always thought it looked hard for men to keep their beards trimmed just right.
Just being a woman....
I just wanted the bees to go away. And they did.
FWIW, "The bees" is a term I used to describe life before transition. It was like trying to everyday things, or anything for that matter, while trying to swat away a swarm of bees and not get stung.
I simply look forward to enjoying daily life. When I get to a point when I look and feel like myself 24/7 and other people generally perceive me as such, I'd enjoy every mundane thing feasible. I won't take anything for granted; simply being referred to by my actual name will never cease to amaze me.
Quote from: Lady_Oracle on April 06, 2016, 08:07:55 PM
Surgery is the last part of my transition so I'll just list what I'm looking forward to when im post op.
let's see in no particular order
- swimming in a bikini, sucks that I have a bikini bod but can't really wear any yet :(
- actually having a sex life
- being able to enjoy showers/bathes and not loathe them anymore
- not having to think twice about what my outfit is due to my downstairs
- wearing dresses/skirts without undies (would help a ton with preventing yeast infections)
adding on to the list
- going to events & traveling by myself with newfound confidence and security post surgery
- going to a nudist beach
- actually getting a gym membership
- being able to dance freely with other people without silly fears plaguing my mind
- getting back into sports and joining teams to compete
I don't know how many of these things I'll actually ever experience, but:
* Having people look at me and having them not see a man.
* Being accepted by women as a woman.
* People (esp. women) being more okay with physical contact with me. I'm by nature physically affectionate and really need (gentle) physical contact. I hate that being seen as a man means touching is seen as a sexual advance.
I don't know if this counts as "looking forward," but I'm wondering whether, if and when nobody sees me as a man, I'll feel more comfortable with men and (some kinds of) masculinity. I think at this point, I'm still pretty traumatized by having had masculinity shoved down my throat my whole life, so seeing people be masculine, even in the non-toxic way, is kind of triggering.
I look forward to just being one person, a nice attractive hetrosexual woman. Dating new men & enjoying some good clean hot sex would be great to enjoy. I've always enjoyed men but had to apologize for not having a complete body normal body to so many very nice men......That would be great to never have to apologize again for anything.
Ive only one wish: Get healthy.
Quote from: alienbodybuilder on April 04, 2016, 06:30:02 PM
Seeing someone posting their good experience of life after transition inspired me to ask this question.
What are some of the main things you look forward to after transition and living your life as your true gender?
I look forward as being taken more seriously and respected as a male. I look forward to someday to having more physical strength and body building to help that along. Work a job as a male instead of a female and male bonding, as well as having an emotional attachment to my body I don't have as a female and sure I'll have as a male.
I can't wait to go outside and swim after top surgery
I can't wait to meet someone and them see me as a guy without question and treat me the same as other men
without assumptions or judgment.
I can't wait to have the feeling that i'm comfortable, i wonder what it feels like to be comfortable to a degree
and i can't to experience that because the closest iv'e gotten was the day i walked outside in male clothing and packed. So i think i can't wait to see myself as myself basically.
And i hope that i'm making the right choice and it'll help me out :)
After becoming full time I look forward to improve my very poor social life. Hopefully others will increase their efforts in socialising with me :P
After SRS I look forward to recover any kind of sexual life.
Looking at a different face in the mirror. My dysphoria is centered around my face.
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Quote from: alienbodybuilder on April 04, 2016, 06:30:02 PM
Seeing someone posting their good experience of life after transition inspired me to ask this question.
What are some of the main things you look forward to after transition and living your life as your true gender?
I look forward as being taken more seriously and respected as a male. I look forward to someday to having more physical strength and body building to help that along. Work a job as a male instead of a female and male bonding, as well as having an emotional attachment to my body I don't have as a female and sure I'll have as a male.
Hopefully aspiring eunuchs such as myself likewise qualify for this question of yours. :)
Anyway, though, in addition to becoming a (literal) eunuch, I myself am most looking forward to having a sufficiently nice body
and a sufficiently nice face for me to wear female clothes such as skirts, short shorts, knee socks, knee boots, and bikinis. :) Indeed, I hope that I will be able to rock a bikini body as well as many women can! :) ;)
I want to stop thinking about it all the time.
Quote from: AnonyMs on June 01, 2016, 09:29:50 PM
I want to stop thinking about it all the time.
Hallelujah, preach it! :eusa_clap: :icon_shakefist:
Quote from: RavenMoon on June 01, 2016, 06:04:37 PM
Looking at a different face in the mirror. My dysphoria is centered around my face.
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You remind me of what I imagine Polgara from the Belgarath series looks like (just missing that white streak of hair by the temple) which if you're familiar with that series (high fantasy) is definitely a compliment. ;)
i mostly just want to feel pretty and not be harassed for being myself.
Here are my main ones:
- To havea fully functioning vagina as I should do
- To finally get an SO (hopefully XD)
- To have people be more open with me and share physical contact more ^_^
Willow, I'm much the same, oh happy day for a normal depth vagina & for me anyway enjoy men completely. I love the feel of a man inside me. Then just enjoy life every day as a nice woman......A happy confident sexy attractive woman.....
I look forward most to just finally being happy in my own skin. Being able to be called what I want to, date as a man, be respected as a man, everything would be amazing. I can't even wrap my head around how happy that makes me just thinking about it.
Oh and also doing everything shirtless ;D
I look forward to a lot of things after I transition. Mainly just to be finally connected with my mind and body and feel happier in my own skin.
I can't wait to be seen as a male all the time, be "legally" male, dating as a male. Everything I just can't wait to be seen as my true self.
Death
Not having to think about things that majority of the population doesn't have to think about. Being full time I'm almost to this point, but until bottom surgery is done I will worry about bigots.
I can't wait to swim shirtless.
I want a body that feels like my own and preferably looks good too.
I want to go out and pick up chicks with my mates without people thinking 'ooh a lesbian'.
I'd like to see my preferred name and a little 'M' on my passport/ID.
I want to dress up for parties and not be the girl in the suit.
I'm really looking forward to not being misgendered or disbelieved.
I don't mind being criticized as a stereotype-enforcing white male lawyer.
Being able to go to the gym and wear a 1piece suit to swim -- I hate the in-between of now where my breasts are clearly not those of a guy but my downstairs makes suits shaped for women unworkable.
Never having to go into a men's locker room or toilets again, those are the places I've felt most uncomfortable all my life.
Having a vagina and having another woman go down on me or fist me. I miss ejaculations and my libido, I look forward to a body that better fits my (still new, still learning) feminine emotions.
I look forward to having the option of passing, I can't imagine I will do so every day but having it be possible would help.
Some things that I want and can't count on --
My gf of 18 years becoming comfortable with my feminine body.
The acceptance of my first daughter of the changes. This one is hard, she's known I'm trans for a long time and has always wanted a "don't ask, don't tell" approach which makes me sad. She's been away working on her master's degree for the entire time I've been on hrt and so I will need to come out with her before her next visit.
What can i say I just like staring at myself in a mirror i guess i am a bit self obsessive but ever since i looked like i could pass in my eyes i love looking at myself. Other than finally loving how i look on the outside i have no real plan. I will be joining the military in 2 years time's. Mostly for my own selfish wants, plus learn new skills. I would like to go to college once i get out of the service and hoping to get off after 4 years. I scored in the top bracket on my asvab so that should help me get a decent job while serving.
Quote from: roseyfox on July 03, 2016, 06:31:10 PM
What can i say I just like staring at myself in a mirror i guess i am a bit self obsessive but ever since i looked like i could pass in my eyes i love looking at myself. Other than finally loving how i look on the outside i have no real plan. I will be joining the military in 2 years time's. Mostly for my own selfish wants, plus learn new skills. I would like to go to college once i get out of the service and hoping to get off after 4 years. I scored in the top bracket on my asvab so that should help me get a decent job while serving.
Good luck in the military. I'll be praying for you.
Quote from: AnonyMs on June 01, 2016, 09:29:50 PM
I want to stop thinking about it all the time.
I feel this way too.