Okay! Here's a place to talk about names....Because I didn't see one, and I'm curious!
I myself am actually really unsure of how to go about choosing a name...I've always been bad about naming things. I even regretted what I've name a beta fish in the past.
My birth name is Melanie Courtney, and my family always called me Courtney....Now that I've learned the kind of things I've repressed I found out that my rebellious phase of hating the name Courtney and choosing to go by Melanie (Mela, actually) wasn't really rebellion, but my first bought with dysphoria. That started when I was about 13 or 14 and it was sense shortened to Mel...I also went by Court for a while when I first hit my 20's....
My original birth name was supposed to be Melanie Lee, so when I first got my dysphoria at 17 I thought it would be a great name for me. When I was 21 and mostly identifying male for the first time I chose the name Steven Lee....And I actually still really like that name. Steven Lee rolls off the tongue!
I've currently been going by Mac, simple because it's easy and it's almost border line my legal initial....MCC...I even changed my Facebook name to MC Curvin rather than having the full name up there, but since I am still closeted with my family I couldn't go straight out for Mac. Since then, I've compiled a list and I'm trying to to make it too long....but I just really wanted to see the process that others go through when picking a name!
I want to hear other people's stories on choosing a name, legally changing it, and the process that others are going through if you're not sure about what name to choose at this time.
I know that lists are a good place to start, but I always don't want to be one of those people who gets everyone use to one name and then takes it back because something sounds better...So I'm trying to make sure my mind is set before I start telling everyone what to call me.
So....How'd you do it / how are you doing it? DISH! ;D
I had a couple of criteria when choosing.
1 i didn't want a name that was the same as any of the women i know.
2 i wanted it to have meaning, i went to a baby name website and chose a bunch of names i liked and then i reflected on their meaning and picked a first and middle name that spoke to me.
Sent from my SM-G920W8 using Tapatalk
I stuck with Tommi, because most people close to me already called me "Tommy," anyway. My original middle name was same as my dad's, I switched to my mom's. I actually love *her*. I was going to go by TommiLynn, but it seems a whole lot of people are SomethingLynn, so I'll stick with Tommi. I'm just going to switch my last name to my wife's.
--
"You do realize, this means you get to do character creation & the newbie zone all over again? :D"
I picked a female idol and borrowed her name.
That worked really well for me
I wanted to keep my initials so I looked at names that start with R. I really liked Robyn so I picked that one. Still haven't thought of a middle name yet.
I just chose it randomly; can't quite remember how I found it. Having a name which was uncommon was important to me as my dead name was extremely common which was annoying. I also wanted something that suited my personality; so I liked how it didn't sound too fem or too masculine. It didn't feel like it completely fit me; I don't think any names do. But I liked it more and more after I got used to people using it. And I didn't want to go through the hassle of looking through 1000s of names.
My birth names were Keith Lawrence. If there had been a feminine version of Keith, I would have used it. (Actually, there is - Keitha - but, ugh!!) Kathy was the closest I could come up with. I hadn't decided if it was going to be short for Katherine or Kathleen, but my wife told me she liked the name Kathleen, so that was it. Lauren is obvious from Lawrence. Kathy and Lauren are both age-appropriate for my generation. Thanks to hanging out here, I was quite used to calling myself Kathy before I went full-time.
My legal name change is a mess and currently in limbo. It turns out that, because I am an immigrant, they need my Record of Landing before they can process the name change. Which I don't have, seeing as I was only 10 years old at the time. So I have had to apply to the feds for a replacement Record of Landing, which will take six months. :icon_yikes:
In the meantime, I am glad that I kept the same initials. I needed to order new cheques for my bank account. I got them printed with my initials, so they will be good before and after my name change.
The girl standing behind me in the avatar named me Devlyn. She didn't like the name I had given myself: Tracey. But it has meaning to me, so I kept it.
Hugs, Devlyn Marie Tracey
So to pick my name, I did a couple things.
1. I talked to my mom about what my parents had planned for a name for me if I had been born with a female body. She told me that they had two names, Christine and Erin. I don't feel like a Christine, but she also told me that she had unofficially assigned the name Erin to the female of a set of twins that she mis-carried. So I felt that wasn't good.
2. I made a list of names that I liked and researched each of them. I looked at how common they were when I was born to ensure I was choosing a name that was age appropriate. I also looked at the etymology of each name because I wanted one that had some meaning for me.
3. I ended up putting Alyssa on the list because of a somewhat silly but profound experience. I was in NYC on business which always results in pretty heavy dysphoria (having to be my male facade for a full week both in dress and in personality). In the cab on the way to Laguardia to head home I was really feeling beat down by the week of dysphoria and I cried repeatedly. We got stuck in traffic somewhere in Queens and I remember looking up and seeing some really impressive and artistic graffiti on a fence lining the road. It really caught my eye and in the middle of it was the name Alyssa in huge decorated letters. At that exact moment, I felt a total calm come over me and I pretty much knew this would be my name. But still I didn't commit.
4. I got my list narrowed down to three names plus the feminized version of my male name. I went on a 4-day weekend trip with my sisters in Minneapolis, the plan being to spend the entire time (even traveling by plane) totally in my authentic female presentation. While there I planned to try out each name for a day. Well my sisters started with Alyssa for the first day. When we got back to the hotel that night, I looked at them both and told them there was no need to try any other names. I said "My name is Alyssa". Some hugs and tears followed, but it was just the name that felt right. After being called Alyssa repeatedly I just knew it was me. It just fit.
So that's where I'm at right now. I have not done my name change yet. My plan is that when I go full time (which will be toward the end of this year) I will do my name change as part of that. Once I no longer need my male name it can go away. Name change process in Wisconsin is pretty simple. I need to file a petition with the court, then for 1 day, 3 weeks in a row, I have to run an add in the newspaper announcing my intention to change my name. When complete, the newspaper gives me an affidavit stating I've done this and I go back for a court hearing. Unless there are any legitimate objections or other issues, the judge will order my name changed and issue a court order. From there I can go change (in this order) my drivers license and vehicle titles, social security, passport, bank records, home title, everything else. I have the option, which I plan to try, to ask for a confidential name change which doesn't require the newspaper ads. I just have to justify that publishing it would cause a threat to my safety. I think publicly announcing that I'm transgender to the entire city and providing my name and address would put me in danger, so hopefully I get an open-minded judge who agrees.
Gender change is a little tougher. I need a doctor's letter stating that I am undergoing the necessary medical treatment to change my gender. This will allow me to change my driver's license and SSN info which then allows me to change almost everything else. I can't in Wisconsin, however, change my birth certificate gender until I have GCS and a doctor signs off confirming it. I've heard that I need my birth certificate changed before I can change my passport, but I haven't confirmed that yet.
My wife did. I'm a big person so she picked a German name.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
My mom actually suggested my name. My male name was Julian so she suggested Julia. It worked out very well because it was easy for people to switch to Julia than like a whole different name. My parents got a lawyer for the legal name change. I had to go before the judge but it was really easy. To change my gender on my ID I just took a letter from my Dr. Here in Colorado they let you do it with a Dr's letter even if you haven't has surgery. The form for the doctor only has to say you live full time and that you are taking hrt. Thankfully it was pretty easy.
Julia.
BTW Mac, your avatar looks great. Very handsome.
My birth name was Madison Ashley.
When I was 12, I made a list of all the male/unisex names I liked from a baby name website and asked all of my friends to vote one which one they thought suited me best. The ones with the most votes made it to the next round, in which I did the same thing again. I eventually narrowed it down to 3: Dakota, Danny, and Dylan. Dylan got the most votes, so I thought I'd be going by Dylan.
When I was finally allowed to socially transition at 14, I had already decided on another that would be more similar to my birth name: Max. I had yet to choose what Max would be a nickname for, and I almost just went with Max as the full name, but then when I was about 16 I decided to talk to my dad about what the Russian name for Max would be, and he told me it was Maxim, or Maksim as it's written. That was it! I wanted to be Maksim.
My middle name was almost something like Ashton, but I wasn't feeling it. My dad told me he always wanted a son named Nick, so I decided to go with Nikolai.
So now I'm Maksim Nikolai!
Maksim is a really cool name.
I went through a baby name website and looked for a name that was close to both my first and middle name. I came up with Josilyn as the first few letters are the same as my dead name. Also, I liked the spelling of my name as it is really unique and I liked that. I ultimately came up with Josilyn Deanna. The middle name is just an extension of my old middle name.
I was able to get a petition for my name and gender change from my therapist, she went to law school before becoming a therapist, so that really helped. I was pretty nervous when I went to court, but the judge asked me 1 question. It was to explain why I wanted to change my name in my own words. She then granted both the name and gender change.
In order to get my drivers license, I needed to have a birth certificate in my new name. I immediately applied for that. After a few weeks I had that in hand. I was then able to get my license and start changing over all my accounts to my new name.
I'll say this, and it's definitely a personal preference and each of us has to make our own decision, but while it's common for some to want to find an alternate version of their given name, I intentionally set out to find something different. I bring this up just as food for thought. My male name is one of those that has a male and female form and both are pronounced the same (literally, just change a y to an i). Yes it would have been easier for everyone I know had I just gone with the i and kept the name. However that's exactly why I didn't go that route. I figured it made it too easy for people to continue to think of me as my male persona and not accept the transition. They could essentially "dead name" me without me realizing it (unless it was in print). By going with Alyssa, I know that they're having to process in their heads that I'm not the male person they knew me to be, and instead I am a woman. And if they use the wrong name I can address the issue right away.
Again, there are plenty good reasons to go with a alternate version and you have to decide what is right for you. I just wanted to give you something to think about that you may not have otherwise considered.
I like my user name here. My mom HATED it, and said she is using a Veto on it. Funny thing, when I went to Colorado, I asked my friend to introduce me a "Claire" which I had previously chose as my middle name. It felt more natural. I think I have decided to go with Claire Lydenne. Lydenne is my mothers middle name.
I find it easy to switch names, it is like wearing a different outfit. I have been Thorfinn, Clarrisa, Keighvelthalan, Larrisa, Artesia, and countless more. Being in the SCA, LARPing, and Playing paper and video RPGs will do that. Of course, wearing all those names I now know was my release from the me that I hated being.
Quote from: pinzandneedlez on June 22, 2017, 12:58:47 PM
I had a couple of criteria when choosing.
1 i didn't want a name that was the same as any of the women i know.
2 i wanted it to have meaning, i went to a baby name website and chose a bunch of names i liked and then i reflected on their meaning and picked a first and middle name that spoke to me.
Sent from my SM-G920W8 using Tapatalk
That first one is a big concern for me....Like I don't want to choose anything that matches acquaintances, male family members, co-workers or friends and that takes out a LOT of options.
I do check baby name websites though because I do think it's important to have a name that has meaning to you and something you can relate to, you know?
Quote from: Tommi on June 22, 2017, 01:04:23 PM
I stuck with Tommi, because most people close to me already called me "Tommy," anyway. My original middle name was same as my dad's, I switched to my mom's. I actually love *her*. I was going to go by TommiLynn, but it seems a whole lot of people are SomethingLynn, so I'll stick with Tommi. I'm just going to switch my last name to my wife's.
--
"You do realize, this means you get to do character creation & the newbie zone all over again? :D"
That sounds like a super painless way to do things! And if it's something you're happy with, it doesn't really matter that it's easy for the people around you, but I'm sure it definitely helps...Because it's hard for some people to wrap their head around.
There aren't really any male versions for my middle name, but it's considered both a male and female name...however I generally associate it with females, as for Melanie, there's Mel, but even when I went by that it felt more like a nick name than anything.
Quote from: MissKairi on June 22, 2017, 01:31:58 PM
I picked a female idol and borrowed her name.
That worked really well for me
That's actually how I picked Steven, originally....*cough* Steve Rogers *cough*.
Quote from: RobynTx on June 22, 2017, 01:45:13 PM
I wanted to keep my initials so I looked at names that start with R. I really liked Robyn so I picked that one. Still haven't thought of a middle name yet.
I've considered keeping my initials as well.....But for some reason none of the first name-middle name combos roll off the tongue very well. I think when you base it off your initials it can be a little more difficult....Just don't force anything, because you definitely want to pick something that feels right.
Quote from: Elis on June 22, 2017, 01:57:32 PM
I just chose it randomly; can't quite remember how I found it. Having a name which was uncommon was important to me as my dead name was extremely common which was annoying. I also wanted something that suited my personality; so I liked how it didn't sound too fem or too masculine. It didn't feel like it completely fit me; I don't think any names do. But I liked it more and more after I got used to people using it. And I didn't want to go through the hassle of looking through 1000s of names.
I feel that on going through a lot of names. I like Elis....It's actually pretty neat, and while it's not something you really hear of it doesn't sound too terribly out there...So nice choice bro!
Quote from: KathyLauren on June 22, 2017, 02:08:40 PM
My birth names were Keith Lawrence. If there had been a feminine version of Keith, I would have used it. (Actually, there is - Keitha - but, ugh!!) Kathy was the closest I could come up with. I hadn't decided if it was going to be short for Katherine or Kathleen, but my wife told me she liked the name Kathleen, so that was it. Lauren is obvious from Lawrence. Kathy and Lauren are both age-appropriate for my generation. Thanks to hanging out here, I was quite used to calling myself Kathy before I went full-time.
My legal name change is a mess and currently in limbo. It turns out that, because I am an immigrant, they need my Record of Landing before they can process the name change. Which I don't have, seeing as I was only 10 years old at the time. So I have had to apply to the feds for a replacement Record of Landing, which will take six months. :icon_yikes:
In the meantime, I am glad that I kept the same initials. I needed to order new cheques for my bank account. I got them printed with my initials, so they will be good before and after my name change.
OMG...I'm literally rolling over Keitha :laugh:
....That's like Clark Kent = Glasses vs Glasses off = Super Man.
Kathleen is a pretty name though! I hope your name change goes smoothly and you get all your paperwork soon!
That's super smart for your checks though! >:)
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on June 22, 2017, 02:19:56 PM
The girl standing behind me in the avatar named me Devlyn. She didn't like the name I had given myself: Tracey. But it has meaning to me, so I kept it.
Hugs, Devlyn Marie Tracey
If it means something to you and feels right, don't change it for anyone :-* Glad you kept it, in addition!
Quote from: transguymac on June 23, 2017, 10:00:47 AM
I feel that on going through a lot of names. I like Elis....It's actually pretty neat, and while it's not something you really hear of it doesn't sound too terribly out there...So nice choice bro!
Thanks man :). It's getting super annoying how people still somehow manage to misspell my name or to shorten it though :P
My parents told me a long time ago that my name would have been Jessica had I been born a girl so I have always went with that for my female persona. The thought never occured to me to pick a middle name until just now reading this thread.
Quote from: AlyssaJ on June 22, 2017, 02:28:09 PM
So to pick my name, I did a couple things.
1. I talked to my mom about what my parents had planned for a name for me if I had been born with a female body. She told me that they had two names, Christine and Erin. I don't feel like a Christine, but she also told me that she had unofficially assigned the name Erin to the female of a set of twins that she mis-carried. So I felt that wasn't good.
2. I made a list of names that I liked and researched each of them. I looked at how common they were when I was born to ensure I was choosing a name that was age appropriate. I also looked at the etymology of each name because I wanted one that had some meaning for me.
3. I ended up putting Alyssa on the list because of a somewhat silly but profound experience. I was in NYC on business which always results in pretty heavy dysphoria (having to be my male facade for a full week both in dress and in personality). In the cab on the way to Laguardia to head home I was really feeling beat down by the week of dysphoria and I cried repeatedly. We got stuck in traffic somewhere in Queens and I remember looking up and seeing some really impressive and artistic graffiti on a fence lining the road. It really caught my eye and in the middle of it was the name Alyssa in huge decorated letters. At that exact moment, I felt a total calm come over me and I pretty much knew this would be my name. But still I didn't commit.
4. I got my list narrowed down to three names plus the feminized version of my male name. I went on a 4-day weekend trip with my sisters in Minneapolis, the plan being to spend the entire time (even traveling by plane) totally in my authentic female presentation. While there I planned to try out each name for a day. Well my sisters started with Alyssa for the first day. When we got back to the hotel that night, I looked at them both and told them there was no need to try any other names. I said "My name is Alyssa". Some hugs and tears followed, but it was just the name that felt right. After being called Alyssa repeatedly I just knew it was me. It just fit.
So that's where I'm at right now. I have not done my name change yet. My plan is that when I go full time (which will be toward the end of this year) I will do my name change as part of that. Once I no longer need my male name it can go away. Name change process in Wisconsin is pretty simple. I need to file a petition with the court, then for 1 day, 3 weeks in a row, I have to run an add in the newspaper announcing my intention to change my name. When complete, the newspaper gives me an affidavit stating I've done this and I go back for a court hearing. Unless there are any legitimate objections or other issues, the judge will order my name changed and issue a court order. From there I can go change (in this order) my drivers license and vehicle titles, social security, passport, bank records, home title, everything else. I have the option, which I plan to try, to ask for a confidential name change which doesn't require the newspaper ads. I just have to justify that publishing it would cause a threat to my safety. I think publicly announcing that I'm transgender to the entire city and providing my name and address would put me in danger, so hopefully I get an open-minded judge who agrees.
Gender change is a little tougher. I need a doctor's letter stating that I am undergoing the necessary medical treatment to change my gender. This will allow me to change my driver's license and SSN info which then allows me to change almost everything else. I can't in Wisconsin, however, change my birth certificate gender until I have GCS and a doctor signs off confirming it. I've heard that I need my birth certificate changed before I can change my passport, but I haven't confirmed that yet.
This is actually a really logical and well-thought out way to go about it. Very precise and thorough. I think I might have to try these myself!
I'm sorry about your mother's loss.
I actually considered the name Jason, because my grandmother's first child (who was still born) was named Jason....Kind of like a tribute to him and my Nana, but my friend pointed out that it might be kind of tough for my grandmother....which me being trans is tough enough on her...if I ever had the guts to tell her.
I think your process is really amazing and I'm glad you found your name!
Quote from: Gertrude on June 22, 2017, 02:52:05 PM
My wife did. I'm a big person so she picked a German name.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
That's one you don't hear every day. That's really awesome how your wife helped though!
Quote from: Julia1996 on June 22, 2017, 04:03:34 PM
My mom actually suggested my name. My male name was Julian so she suggested Julia. It worked out very well because it was easy for people to switch to Julia than like a whole different name. My parents got a lawyer for the legal name change. I had to go before the judge but it was really easy. To change my gender on my ID I just took a letter from my Dr. Here in Colorado they let you do it with a Dr's letter even if you haven't has surgery. The form for the doctor only has to say you live full time and that you are taking hrt. Thankfully it was pretty easy.
Julia.
BTW Mac, your avatar looks great. Very handsome.
Just form your picture I think Julia really suits you! And that's near that it works off your given name.
The process here is similar, but I'm laying low on ID's and name changes right now because my car is registered back in my home states and if I switch my ID I have to switch my tag and insurance, and insurance here is ridiculous due to the amount of people and the traffic, so I can't really afford it right now, but I'm planning on getting it taken care of ASAP once I have the funds.
Also, thank you so much! I've actually really wanted to tell you how absolutely gorgeous you are, as well, but I didn't want seem creepy or weird....So a compliment for a compliment. :-*
Quote from: maksim on June 22, 2017, 04:56:30 PM
My birth name was Madison Ashley.
When I was 12, I made a list of all the male/unisex names I liked from a baby name website and asked all of my friends to vote one which one they thought suited me best. The ones with the most votes made it to the next round, in which I did the same thing again. I eventually narrowed it down to 3: Dakota, Danny, and Dylan. Dylan got the most votes, so I thought I'd be going by Dylan.
When I was finally allowed to socially transition at 14, I had already decided on another that would be more similar to my birth name: Max. I had yet to choose what Max would be a nickname for, and I almost just went with Max as the full name, but then when I was about 16 I decided to talk to my dad about what the Russian name for Max would be, and he told me it was Maxim, or Maksim as it's written. That was it! I wanted to be Maksim.
My middle name was almost something like Ashton, but I wasn't feeling it. My dad told me he always wanted a son named Nick, so I decided to go with Nikolai.
So now I'm Maksim Nikolai!
I like it! *o*
It sounds very Russia, but at the same time not super out of the norm.
I've always loved the name Ashton, but if it's not right, it's not right. ;) It's super cool that your dad was able to assist on picking a middle name. I think it's really sweet when parents are supportive of their trans kids....Especially considering all of the awful stories from other people about their experience with their parents. :'(
Quote from: Josilyn on June 22, 2017, 05:37:02 PM
I went through a baby name website and looked for a name that was close to both my first and middle name. I came up with Josilyn as the first few letters are the same as my dead name. Also, I liked the spelling of my name as it is really unique and I liked that. I ultimately came up with Josilyn Deanna. The middle name is just an extension of my old middle name.
I was able to get a petition for my name and gender change from my therapist, she went to law school before becoming a therapist, so that really helped. I was pretty nervous when I went to court, but the judge asked me 1 question. It was to explain why I wanted to change my name in my own words. She then granted both the name and gender change.
In order to get my drivers license, I needed to have a birth certificate in my new name. I immediately applied for that. After a few weeks I had that in hand. I was then able to get my license and start changing over all my accounts to my new name.
That's super lucky with your therapist! I'm sure that helped a little. The legal process really doesn't seem too hard, but I'm a procrastinating, whiny, lazy person who hates adulting so it seems really tedious at the same time...But I'm really exciting for doing it all one day!
Quote from: AlyssaJ on June 22, 2017, 05:43:56 PM
I'll say this, and it's definitely a personal preference and each of us has to make our own decision, but while it's common for some to want to find an alternate version of their given name, I intentionally set out to find something different. I bring this up just as food for thought. My male name is one of those that has a male and female form and both are pronounced the same (literally, just change a y to an i). Yes it would have been easier for everyone I know had I just gone with the i and kept the name. However that's exactly why I didn't go that route. I figured it made it too easy for people to continue to think of me as my male persona and not accept the transition. They could essentially "dead name" me without me realizing it (unless it was in print). By going with Alyssa, I know that they're having to process in their heads that I'm not the male person they knew me to be, and instead I am a woman. And if they use the wrong name I can address the issue right away.
Again, there are plenty good reasons to go with a alternate version and you have to decide what is right for you. I just wanted to give you something to think about that you may not have otherwise considered.
I see both sides of this one!
But as you stated, you have to decided what is right for you. :)
I really just enjoy how everyone's journey is different and everyone's process is done in different steps and paths. And I actually really love all of the feedback from everyone.
Thanks for elaborating and sharing your opinion Alyssa!
Quote from: Artesia on June 22, 2017, 08:38:13 PM
I like my user name here. My mom HATED it, and said she is using a Veto on it. Funny thing, when I went to Colorado, I asked my friend to introduce me a "Claire" which I had previously chose as my middle name. It felt more natural. I think I have decided to go with Claire Lydenne. Lydenne is my mothers middle name.
I find it easy to switch names, it is like wearing a different outfit. I have been Thorfinn, Clarrisa, Keighvelthalan, Larrisa, Artesia, and countless more. Being in the SCA, LARPing, and Playing paper and video RPGs will do that. Of course, wearing all those names I now know was my release from the me that I hated being.
Ooooo....I really like Larrisa!!!!
And Claire is really pretty too....Very feminine!
Switching names is actually harder for me than you'd assume. I used to role play A LOT and cosplay A LOT and was actually really good at being in character, but when it comes to trying out certain names in real life...my friend will be calling me across store like "MAC" and I'm just like...off in space and then I'm like..."Oh yeah, dat me." In my defense, she has another friend name Mac, so one time I though she just saw the other Mac and continuing looking at over-priced t-shirts.
Quote from: baseballfan on June 23, 2017, 10:14:59 AM
My parents told me a long time ago that my name would have been Jessica had I been born a girl so I have always went with that for my female persona. The thought never occured to me to pick a middle name until just now reading this thread.
I don't consider middle names absolutely necessary....But lots of people do have them. Some people don't have a middle and some people have two middle....it's all up to you. Follow your dreams!
Quote from: transguymac on June 23, 2017, 10:45:28 AM
I don't consider middle names absolutely necessary....But lots of people do have them. Some people don't have a middle and some people have two middle....it's all up to you. Follow your dreams!
Haha thanks! I like the idea of picking a middle name since i didnt really choose my first....it chose me!
Good luck with whatever you do end up doing!
Quote from: transguymac on June 23, 2017, 10:00:47 AM
I've considered keeping my initials as well.....But for some reason none of the first name-middle name combos roll off the tongue very well. I think when you base it off your initials it can be a little more difficult....Just don't force anything, because you definitely want to pick something that feels right.
I used to some art and I always used my initials. That and for work. Just haven't found a good name that starts with an S that goes well with Robyn.
This is going to sound like I have a few screws loose, but soon after I began my transition a voice in my head said "you're Shannon!" I swear I am not making this up. So I took that name and the feminine equivalent of my former middle name, Michelle. Shannon Michelle. It sounded sweet to me. Then I found out that Shannon Michelle is the name of a porn star. But I liked it, and I kept it.
Quote from: Nancys Girl on June 23, 2017, 12:03:44 PM
This is going to sound like I have a few screws loose, but soon after I began my transition a voice in my head said "you're Shannon!" I swear I am not making this up. So I took that name and the feminine equivalent of my former middle name, Michelle. Shannon Michelle. It sounded sweet to me. Then I found out that Shannon Michelle is the name of a porn star. But I liked it, and I kept it.
I don't think so at all!! It's awesome that you just knew you're name and didn't have to search around or try out different names first.
Also...that's really hilarious!!! :laugh:
My co-worker's, ( a cis female ) found out that there's a Porn Star with her exact name as well and she was so worried it was going to interfere with her getting a job if someone searched her before interviewing. xD;
It's only in the last few days that I've started to think about changing my name to something completely different. I agree with Allyssa's arguments that making a radical change makes it a lot easier for others to be aware of the change. I was initially going to simply use the masculine version of my female name, but that will really confuse people for some time, plus I would rather that people would not remember the female me as I go forward.
I've not yet decided if I will change only my first name or my family name as well. I will definitely drop the very female middle name.
What name to choose, that is the big question. I am Scandinavian background and will probably choose a typical Scandinavian name. Plus, it will have to have some meaning to me. Thinking....
I went from Charles Edward to Carly Emelinda. Going from Charles to Carly was pretty easy. I've never personally known a girl or woman named Carly so no problems there. Carly Simon had the name before I did (she is 17 years older than I am). It was not a popular name the year I was born but it started to spike with Carly Simon's musical career in 1968, six years after I was born.
Edward does not feminize well. Emelinda is a popular name in the Philippines where my wife is from and I love the sound of it. It also contracts to Mindy, a name I used for an online profile on an old online BBS back in the days before the internet, when dinosaurs roamed the earth.
I choose Jaclyn Marie the Lyn part is my daughter middle name and the Marie is my mother middle name. I didn't want my name any where close to my birth name
Sent from my Z981 using Tapatalk
Rachel was my great Grannys name on my mom's side,and would have been mine had I been born a girl.
I turned my first name Christopher to Christina, as it was the name my dad gave me.
So far he is not atall accepting and he has not talked to me in atleast 4 months since he found out, even if he never comes round, I still want the name he give me, or the female varient of it
I passed on one choice because someone I know well is seeing an individual with the same name. Which is awkward.
Decided to go with the name I would have been called by my parents as the alternate gender name/backup choice. I got more fond of it as time went on. I don't know anyone else with the name, so that's good.
I have not legally changed my names yet. But I chose a name that noone in my surroundings have. That is Oliver. I also chose a second name that is Tony. My son's name is Anton. Tony is short for Anthony/Antonio/Anton.
Instead of creating a name and connect with my dad, who I hate, I connected to my son instead.
The names have not been top 10 in my country when I was born. That is also good.
Quote from: Dan on June 24, 2017, 01:24:36 AM
It's only in the last few days that I've started to think about changing my name to something completely different. I agree with Allyssa's arguments that making a radical change makes it a lot easier for others to be aware of the change. I was initially going to simply use the masculine version of my female name, but that will really confuse people for some time, plus I would rather that people would not remember the female me as I go forward.
I've not yet decided if I will change only my first name or my family name as well. I will definitely drop the very female middle name.
What name to choose, that is the big question. I am Scandinavian background and will probably choose a typical Scandinavian name. Plus, it will have to have some meaning to me. Thinking....
I totally get that....A lot of the choices I've picked are a lot different, but not for the fact that they're different, just that I liked them.
That being said, I don't really want people to forget the female me, so much as support me as I become the male me....
I was trying to make a video to post online and I ended up babbling, which is always the case. I got really choked up, because I started getting on to the topic of how I didn't want to leave Melanie Courtney Curvin buried in a ditch somewhere...Sure my future is going to be totally different, but if it wasn't for everything I've gone through and everything I've done, as that female, I wouldn't be where I am today and I definitely wouldn't be the person I am.
Then again, I'm a really cheesy, sentimental person.
Quote from: CarlyMcx on June 24, 2017, 03:03:49 AM
I went from Charles Edward to Carly Emelinda. Going from Charles to Carly was pretty easy. I've never personally known a girl or woman named Carly so no problems there. Carly Simon had the name before I did (she is 17 years older than I am). It was not a popular name the year I was born but it started to spike with Carly Simon's musical career in 1968, six years after I was born.
Edward does not feminize well. Emelinda is a popular name in the Philippines where my wife is from and I love the sound of it. It also contracts to Mindy, a name I used for an online profile on an old online BBS back in the days before the internet, when dinosaurs roamed the earth.
I like Mindy...I've definitely never heard Emelinda before. o:
A male alternative for Edward definitely could have been Eddy (pronounced e-d) though, but I think sometimes it's a good choice to think out of the box!
Quote from: Rachel_Christina on June 24, 2017, 04:08:56 AM
Rachel was my great Grannys name on my mom's side,and would have been mine had I been born a girl.
I turned my first name Christopher to Christina, as it was the name my dad gave me.
So far he is not atall accepting and he has not talked to me in atleast 4 months since he found out, even if he never comes round, I still want the name he give me, or the female varient of it
Awww that's super sweet! I like that! As for your dad, hopefully he'll come around, and I think that your attitude about it is just fine and dandy!
I considered Jason, because my grandmother's first child was named Jason, but he was still born, and while I thought it might be kind of a sweet tribute type thing, I thought it might not be the best idea due to feels and such, and my mom confirmed this for me when I came out to her.
The middle name I often go to is Lee, because that was originally supposed to be Lee.
Quote from: Viktor on June 24, 2017, 05:46:41 AM
I passed on one choice because someone I know well is seeing an individual with the same name. Which is awkward.
Decided to go with the name I would have been called by my parents as the alternate gender name/backup choice. I got more fond of it as time went on. I don't know anyone else with the name, so that's good.
I know! I'm trying not to pick names of people I know, or people other people I know,
know....It's REALLY hard...And if you include my biological father's side of the family it's HUGE and there's lots of men and boys so a lot of the names are taken....Awfully enough, most of them are James, but that's fine, because I don't want to be named after my trash-ass excuse for a sperm donor. :icon_shakefist:
Quote from: MeTonie on June 24, 2017, 06:05:00 AM
I have not legally changed my names yet. But I chose a name that noone in my surroundings have. That is Oliver. I also chose a second name that is Tony. My son's name is Anton. Tony is short for Anthony/Antonio/Anton.
Instead of creating a name and connect with my dad, who I hate, I connected to my son instead.
The names have not been top 10 in my country when I was born. That is also good.
That's a really sweet story though! It's nice that your and your son can share~
IN OTHER NEWS...HELP.
My mother is trying to name me and it's hilarious!
Never in my life did I think I would be happy to be born biologically female, but she never even CHOSE boy names..........
Now she's trying to name me crazy things like
Kevin Jr (My dad's name is Kevin)
Wade (Per her deadpool obsession)
Leggolas
Wendall (A male version of her name)
Manchester Worthington Curvin III (because it "makes me sound like I come from money"... WHAT????? NO ONE IN MY FAMILY HAS THIS NAME...HOW CAN I BE THE 3RD?)
I'd much rather have her be accepting and annoying than un-accepting and rude....But.....WHY????? :icon_evil_laugh:
This is also the same woman who responded to, "What would you say if I told you I want to be man?" with "I'd say you're a waffle." (Which is currently my gender to my mother, I am a waffle...and I'm not even mad...she's a goofball.)
SO here goes on to the next segment:
Did you choose any ridiculous names before you decided on the one you're currently going by or anticipating going by?
Did you get any cooky suggestions from friends and family members of just god awful names you'd rather stay your birth gender than to adapt???
Hi guys,
My name came to me as a youngling I always used to play dress up with my older sister and called myself Kelly.
And so it stuck going from Mychael to Kelly might have no similarities but to me it was meaningful.
When my mom was pregnant the Dr said I was female and she wanted to call me shante' and when I was born Bam! I was male.
So Kelly always stuck even growing up I felt like I had a connection and I am grateful to my sister for allowing me to be me and never trying to make me feel less than I am . she was my rock throughout my life.
And it was always a blast being me in front of her she is truly salt of the earth .
Quote from: transguymac on June 26, 2017, 04:11:00 PM
IN OTHER NEWS...HELP.
My mother is trying to name me and it's hilarious!
Never in my life did I think I would be happy to be born biologically female, but she never even CHOSE boy names..........
Now she's trying to name me crazy things like
Kevin Jr (My dad's name is Kevin)
Wade (Per her deadpool obsession)
Leggolas
Wendall (A male version of her name)
Manchester Worthington Curvin III (because it "makes me sound like I come from money"... WHAT????? NO ONE IN MY FAMILY HAS THIS NAME...HOW CAN I BE THE 3RD?)
I'd much rather have her be accepting and annoying than un-accepting and rude....But.....WHY????? :icon_evil_laugh:
This is also the same woman who responded to, "What would you say if I told you I want to be man?" with "I'd say you're a waffle." (Which is currently my gender to my mother, I am a waffle...and I'm not even mad...she's a goofball.)
SO here goes on to the next segment:
Did you choose any ridiculous names before you decided on the one you're currently going by or anticipating going by?
Did you get any cooky suggestions from friends and family members of just god awful names you'd rather stay your birth gender than to adapt???
Interesting name I personally like Leggolas. ::)
Sort about the late post didn't know you were renewing it . 🙈
Quote from: KellyBear on June 26, 2017, 04:13:37 PM
Hi guys,
My name came to me as a youngling I always used to play dress up with my older sister and called myself Kelly.
And so it stuck going from Mychael to Kelly might have no similarities but to me it was meaningful.
When my mom was pregnant the Dr said I was female and she wanted to call me shante' and when I was born Bam! I was male.
So Kelly always stuck even growing up I felt like I had a connection and I am grateful to my sister for allowing me to be me and never trying to make me feel less than I am . she was my rock throughout my life.
And it was always a blast being me in front of her she is truly salt of the earth .
Quote from: KellyBear on June 26, 2017, 04:17:57 PM
Interesting name I personally like Leggolas. ::)
Sort about the late post didn't know you were renewing it . 🙈
Ha! You're all good!I don't think Leggolas was a very popular name my birth year! :laugh:
That's such a cute story thought!!!!! :icon_cry2: Your sister's the real MVP!
I think you should go with Legolas too ;)
My parents always knew/thought they were going to have a girl; so no help there. Not like my dad was supportive anyhow; so I sympathise about your mum :P
I did come up with some ridiculous more masculine female names before I knew I was trans. Sky was top of my list. So was Georgina as that was my middle name and I secretly wished my dad had got his way as that would have been my first name instead. Now I thank God I was never called Georgie or George :D
Quote from: transguymac on June 26, 2017, 04:57:03 PM
Ha! You're all good!I don't think Leggolas was a very popular name my birth year! :laugh:
That's such a cute story thought!!!!! :icon_cry2: Your sister's the real MVP!
Probably not ^-^ but its an iconic name. still love it tho. I love LOTR. (Fan)
She is super awesome some much spunk love her to bits. Took her cat to the Vet today he had such a nasty fight with a neighbors cat so I felt to bad. Remembering her always being there for me and giving me crap for my ->-bleeped-<-ty beahviour
and thought i m gonna help her out. The cat is better after a shot of anti-b he is a-okay. ^=^
Quote from: Elis on June 26, 2017, 05:09:07 PM
I think you should go with Legolas too ;)
My parents always knew/thought they were going to have a girl; so no help there. Not like my dad was supportive anyhow; so I sympathise about your mum :P
I did come up with some ridiculous more masculine female names before I knew I was trans. Sky was top of my list. So was Georgina as that was my middle name and I secretly wished my dad had got his way as that would have been my first name instead. Now I thank God I was never called Georgie or George :D
Great minds think alike "-"
I think that sky is super pretty , pretty androgynous but super cool.
Georgie is pretty lol ?...... Evil giggles :-D
Quote from: transguymac on June 26, 2017, 04:11:00 PM
Did you get any cooky suggestions from friends and family members of just god awful names you'd rather stay your birth gender than to adapt???
My wife was full of wacky suggestions. Fortunately, none of them were memorable. Or maybe I've just repressed the memoriy. :) Her favourite one was Lula. Ugh!
I remember when I was a kid asking my mom watch she would have named me if I was a girl I dont remember what she would have named me she passed away when I was 8 so I cant reask. I am very emotional about my name so I picked some thing similar to my real name as close as I could get.
This is a really good topic. I worried back and forth a lot before picking mine. I originally didn't want something that ended in a vowel, as I thought it'd make me look like I was trying to be "hyper-feminine" or something. That being said, I looked through online databases of names and their meanings, picked ones that I liked the look/sound of, and researched their meaning. I was always proud of the meaning of my old, boy name, and thought I'd want to be proud of the new meaning too.
I ended up picking Alia based on a character from the Dune books by Frank Herbert. I liked the character, and her story is one of inner turmoil. She struggles with many things too complicated to waste all your time on, but her struggle mirrored mine in some ways.
The clincher was the meaning of the name: Lofty. By coming out, by taking this journey to finally be myself, and by changing my name, I started to rise above the struggles that had come before. I thought it fitting. :-) Now it's my name on all but one identifying document (which will be fixed as soon as I can bring a notary to my new Endo!)
~Alia
I have no idea where Sarah came from. I only know I've been using it for my video game characters forever. Once or twice for tabletop rpg characters. Maybe subconciously I've always known that should have been my name from the start!
My mom chose Abigail Elizabeth based on what my name would have been had I been born female. All these years later, it feels like that's my birth name xD and I know it makes my mom happy that she got to choose.
Choosing a name is kind of a battle. However, I didn't stress too much about it. Even before coming out my girlfriend would jokingly call me, "Vince" or "Vinny" so I kind of kept that name. I very much like the name, despite what my mother thinks.
I love reading all these stories! It's really cool to see how everyone chose their names.
Quote from: transguymac on June 26, 2017, 04:11:00 PM
IN OTHER NEWS...HELP.
My mother is trying to name me and it's hilarious!
Never in my life did I think I would be happy to be born biologically female, but she never even CHOSE boy names..........
Now she's trying to name me crazy things like
Kevin Jr (My dad's name is Kevin)
Wade (Per her deadpool obsession)
Leggolas
Wendall (A male version of her name)
Manchester Worthington Curvin III (because it "makes me sound like I come from money"... WHAT????? NO ONE IN MY FAMILY HAS THIS NAME...HOW CAN I BE THE 3RD?)
I'd much rather have her be accepting and annoying than un-accepting and rude....But.....WHY????? :icon_evil_laugh:
This is also the same woman who responded to, "What would you say if I told you I want to be man?" with "I'd say you're a waffle." (Which is currently my gender to my mother, I am a waffle...and I'm not even mad...she's a goofball.)
SO here goes on to the next segment:
Did you choose any ridiculous names before you decided on the one you're currently going by or anticipating going by?
Did you get any cooky suggestions from friends and family members of just god awful names you'd rather stay your birth gender than to adapt???
Manchester Worthington Curvin III... because it makes you sound like you come from money LOLOL. I also love the waffle response. Your mom sounds awesome. Also, I'd like to say that "Steven Lee" really does suit you.
No one's ever suggested names to me. I tried asking my mom if she had any male names picked out in case I'd been born a boy, but...
Quote from: Elis
My parents always knew/thought they were going to have a girl; so no help there.
I got a response like that. She said, "No, I knew I was going to have a girl." When I asked how, she said, "
I just knew." No help there. It's nice to hear someone else's parent(s) have responded in that way. I suppose some people do have those feelings about the kids they're going to have, but it seems oddly deterministic to me.
The name "Seth" has been with me for a while. It started almost ten years ago as the name of a character in a story I was writing, back before I realized I was trans (I didn't realize how long it'd been until I thought about it... wow). This character evolved and became one I identified with more and more. By the time I realized I was trans this year, he was nearly identical to me aside from appearances--same personality, similar history. At first I didn't want to take the name for myself because I'd always pictured the character as tall, and I'm... well,
not, but then I realized it was silly to not take the name for that reason, and that honestly, the name had sort of been mine for a long time already.
I have yet to tell anyone IRL what my name is. It feels oddly personal, probably because I've been holding onto it for so long without mentioning it to anyone, and didn't talk about my gender identity questioning with much anyone either. I definitely will be telling most everyone before I tell my mother, because I imagine she won't react well to the fact that I plan to change my name. I still haven't worked out how to tell her I will be driving five hours away for an informed consent appointment for HRT in just a couple weeks. (Never driven that far on my own, and haven't talked about HRT with her yet. Not looking forward to this conversation, haha.)
My mother was going to push to be called "Hank" if i was born male. I would've been made fun so much in school. Hank is such a gay name..
Anyway how I've been choosing is i narrowed a few names that were phonetically similar to my birth name (Claire) and ended up with Clay in the end, since Clay is a popular name around where I live and I connect with that name on a pretty deep level (the meaning)
however I recently learned Clay isn't a common name anywhere else, as when i tell people my name they go "Clay? Wow I've never heard that one before!"
So my parents suggested Matt, which is similar to one of my middle names. So Now I have a dilemma. I've already introduced myself as Clay to quite a few people, and I don't like the full "Matthew" but Clay is a very uncommon name so it'd be wise to be called something like Matt.
Either way, I've got two very nice names and I'll figure it out eventually I hope.
Quote from: KellyBear on June 26, 2017, 05:17:00 PM
Great minds think alike "-"
I think that sky is super pretty , pretty androgynous but super cool.
Georgie is pretty lol ?...... Evil giggles :-D
Sky is a really good androgynous name! I've known FTMs and CIS-females who go by Sky...Short of Skyler.
Ash is too! Because it stand for Ashton, Asher, Ashlyn, Ashley, ETC.
You could always go with Georgette??? That's what I named my Gerbil George when I found out he was a she.... xD;
Quote from: KathyLauren on June 26, 2017, 06:44:32 PM
My wife was full of wacky suggestions. Fortunately, none of them were memorable. Or maybe I've just repressed the memoriy. :) Her favourite one was Lula. Ugh!
I kind of Lula!!! Sounds like Luna which is you know....relating to the moon. ;)
Quote from: natalie.ashlyne on June 26, 2017, 06:49:20 PM
I remember when I was a kid asking my mom watch she would have named me if I was a girl I dont remember what she would have named me she passed away when I was 8 so I cant reask. I am very emotional about my name so I picked some thing similar to my real name as close as I could get.
Awwww. I'm very sorry for your loss, and that you can't re-ask. As a sentimental person I can definitely stand by people who choose to pick names close to their birth / dead names. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy!
Quote from: SaintAlia on June 26, 2017, 07:51:01 PM
This is a really good topic. I worried back and forth a lot before picking mine. I originally didn't want something that ended in a vowel, as I thought it'd make me look like I was trying to be "hyper-feminine" or something. That being said, I looked through online databases of names and their meanings, picked ones that I liked the look/sound of, and researched their meaning. I was always proud of the meaning of my old, boy name, and thought I'd want to be proud of the new meaning too.
I ended up picking Alia based on a character from the Dune books by Frank Herbert. I liked the character, and her story is one of inner turmoil. She struggles with many things too complicated to waste all your time on, but her struggle mirrored mine in some ways.
The clincher was the meaning of the name: Lofty. By coming out, by taking this journey to finally be myself, and by changing my name, I started to rise above the struggles that had come before. I thought it fitting. :-) Now it's my name on all but one identifying document (which will be fixed as soon as I can bring a notary to my new Endo!)
~Alia
BOOM! There it is!! I think name meanings are actually really important....Even if I never fully identified with my birth name meaning...
I was told by my mother that Melanie meant Dark and Courtney meant leader...I mean, I'm a pretty dark person and a good leader, but Dark Leader just made me feel like a sith lord.
I picked Steven after Steve Rogers, because I'm nerd trash and really just loved the way it sounded, and I picked Lee, because my original birth name was supposed to be Melanie Lee, after my mom's two best friends when I was born, though Lee was going to feminized to Leigh.
The name I have now doesn't really have any significant meaning behind it, but I'm okay with that. I do love hearing people's stories about choosing and meanings so thank's so much for sharing Alia!!
Quote from: Sarah_P on June 26, 2017, 08:00:20 PM
I have no idea where Sarah came from. I only know I've been using it for my video game characters forever. Once or twice for tabletop rpg characters. Maybe subconciously I've always known that should have been my name from the start!
I've heard this kind of thing from a lot of people recently and it's so fascinating! I'm glad that it really comes so easily for some of us! <3
Quote from: yayo on June 26, 2017, 08:04:49 PM
My mom chose Abigail Elizabeth based on what my name would have been had I been born female. All these years later, it feels like that's my birth name xD and I know it makes my mom happy that she got to choose.
Those are so pretty and sound so nice together. ;w; I'm really glad your mom got to help as well. I was really exciting when my mom wanted to help, and while I know that she's just a jokster, it kind of made me sad that she didn't really have any serious suggestions.......
Those I think Wade, after Deadpool, was actually serious and that makes me happy that my mom wasn't really into nerdy things when I was born or lord knows what the name would have been.
Quote from: Vincent Johnson on July 02, 2017, 05:44:27 AM
Choosing a name is kind of a battle. However, I didn't stress too much about it. Even before coming out my girlfriend would jokingly call me, "Vince" or "Vinny" so I kind of kept that name. I very much like the name, despite what my mother thinks.
I like it too! It's not very common, but it's also not totally out there!
I know a guy named Sebastian Maxwell, and I thought it was so out there at first, but he informed me he has actually met several other FTM's with that name.
Vinny sounds like a bad ass mob boss, and Vince sounds super classy and rich. :P
Quote from: seth.james on July 02, 2017, 02:25:37 PM
I love reading all these stories! It's really cool to see how everyone chose their names.
Manchester Worthington Curvin III... because it makes you sound like you come from money LOLOL. I also love the waffle response. Your mom sounds awesome. Also, I'd like to say that "Steven Lee" really does suit you.
No one's ever suggested names to me. I tried asking my mom if she had any male names picked out in case I'd been born a boy, but...
I got a response like that. She said, "No, I knew I was going to have a girl." When I asked how, she said, "I just knew." No help there. It's nice to hear someone else's parent(s) have responded in that way. I suppose some people do have those feelings about the kids they're going to have, but it seems oddly deterministic to me.
The name "Seth" has been with me for a while. It started almost ten years ago as the name of a character in a story I was writing, back before I realized I was trans (I didn't realize how long it'd been until I thought about it... wow). This character evolved and became one I identified with more and more. By the time I realized I was trans this year, he was nearly identical to me aside from appearances--same personality, similar history. At first I didn't want to take the name for myself because I'd always pictured the character as tall, and I'm... well, not, but then I realized it was silly to not take the name for that reason, and that honestly, the name had sort of been mine for a long time already.
I have yet to tell anyone IRL what my name is. It feels oddly personal, probably because I've been holding onto it for so long without mentioning it to anyone, and didn't talk about my gender identity questioning with much anyone either. I definitely will be telling most everyone before I tell my mother, because I imagine she won't react well to the fact that I plan to change my name. I still haven't worked out how to tell her I will be driving five hours away for an informed consent appointment for HRT in just a couple weeks. (Never driven that far on my own, and haven't talked about HRT with her yet. Not looking forward to this conversation, haha.)
I know right? They're such good stories. T___T
And yeah...I'm okay with my gender being waffle...I do love waffles. She said when the doctor asked her if she wanted a boy or a girl she said both....Careful what you wish for mom!!!! But I feel your struggle, my mom knew she was having a girl so she didn't pick out any boy names either. I wasn't surprised, but I was still kinda bummed when I found out.
(But I was almost an abortion as well, so beggars can't be choosers. BUT THAT'S A STORY FOR ANOTHER DAY!)She really is awesome though! She's hands down my best friend, and if I'd have been anyone else and didn't have such a good sense of humor I'd probably be pretty offended with all the joking she did when I came out to her, but that's how we deal with uncomfortable situations, and we both have really messed up senses of humor. I was actually crying over what a good reaction she had and what a good mom she is and she told me, "Quit being such a little b****."
I like the name Seth a lot, it's kind of a fun name, and based on your posts I've seen around the forum I think it suits you!
That's quite a drive but I hope it goes VERY well for you, and I hope that your name and HRT conversations with your mom goes really well! I'll definitely keep you in my thoughts! -fingers crossed-
Quote from: undautri on July 02, 2017, 03:52:12 PM
My mother was going to push to be called "Hank" if i was born male. I would've been made fun so much in school. Hank is such a gay name..
Anyway how I've been choosing is i narrowed a few names that were phonetically similar to my birth name (Claire) and ended up with Clay in the end, since Clay is a popular name around where I live and I connect with that name on a pretty deep level (the meaning)
however I recently learned Clay isn't a common name anywhere else, as when i tell people my name they go "Clay? Wow I've never heard that one before!"
So my parents suggested Matt, which is similar to one of my middle names. So Now I have a dilemma. I've already introduced myself as Clay to quite a few people, and I don't like the full "Matthew" but Clay is a very uncommon name so it'd be wise to be called something like Matt.
Either way, I've got two very nice names and I'll figure it out eventually I hope.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs2.quickmeme.com%2Fimg%2F28%2F28870ec4de15a8e247fd74550f2f849a7a40eab193f66af432e42dd726db598d.jpg&hash=4ffa0346276be43eeffb137347a78d68a889fd9a)
I'M SO SORRY. I COULDN'T RESIST!!!! XD;;;
Matthew is SUPER common name. At least in US. I actually really like Clay and I don't think it's all that uncommon. I think you should go with what feel right in your gut!
Second best is choosing initials that give you a super cool 3-letter, nick name...Which is what I ALMOST did.
#CLAYFORUNDAUTRI2K17
I'm a gamer, and I've known from a young age that I wanted to change my name. I spent my childhood and teenage years trying out a bunch of different names on various MMOs and RPG forums. My main criteria were that it had to be short, common, and easy to spell and pronounce, because my last name is none of those things and has made my life hell.
Because I'm agender, I originally wanted something gender neutral. But none of the names I tried over the years really ended up resonating with me. The one that finally did is more traditionally male, and was chosen purely as for its resemblance to my screen name in that particular MMO rather than as a serious attempt at finding my real name. But from the moment I started using it, it fit in a way that nothing else has. I even accidentally answered to it in public a few times before I started using it with meatspace acquaintances.
I'm not crazy about the genderedness, but after 15+ years of attempts, I figure that's as good as I'm going to get. I did choose a gender neutral middle name as a backup plan just in case I should ever start feeling dysphoria for being too masculine instead of too feminine.
Quote from: transguymac on July 02, 2017, 11:53:27 PM
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs2.quickmeme.com%2Fimg%2F28%2F28870ec4de15a8e247fd74550f2f849a7a40eab193f66af432e42dd726db598d.jpg&hash=4ffa0346276be43eeffb137347a78d68a889fd9a)
#CLAYFORUNDAUTRI2K17
10/10 reference. My last name also begins with a H and it would end up...very close.
So it's decided, I'm sticking with Clay.
Thanks Mac!
I'm a mama's boy, so I would go with the name she would have picked had I been born male. That name is nowhere near my birth name, which is fine because people hardly call me by my birth name anyway.
The name I go by now is not indicative of gender, so I guess I could use that one too, but... yeah, probably not.
I was searching for a name that was somewhat unique, but also wasn't strange for someone my age. I decided on Hayley, one because of the singer from Paramore, and two, it means "hero"
Quote from: HayleyVera on July 04, 2017, 12:48:39 AM
I was searching for a name that was somewhat unique, but also wasn't strange for someone my age. I decided on Hayley, one because of the singer from Paramore, and two, it means "hero"
Doesn't it actually mean heroine ;) :D. Btw; that's a really pretty name; good choice :)
Names really are a very interesting topic.
Though I tend to go by Meredith much of the time, there's nothing fixed or legal about it - it's just what I've always been called when people don't want to use my birth name.
It's interesting to think about how we choose a name. It's not like names come with a meaning attached to them, but at the same time, names do have a usage history. So, when someone says, "hey, Meredith," I may assume, (because that name has often been used to refer to me,) that the person wants to talk to me.
So, names serve a function, but that function is a property of the things, people and events in a situation. Which is to say, within a given culture, (which can be thought of as 'a way of organising our experience of the world',) we take part in various contexts of situation - each organised around our cultural ideation - and when a name is evoked, what is evoked must be understood in relation to all the situational elements as they are organised from within the world view of a culture. (One thing to remember is that cultures are not just nationalities or language groups, but that cultures exist within smaller groups as well - sports clubs; families; online forums; offline friendships...)
The significant thing to note, therefore, is that the act of choosing to be called something other than what people would otherwise call you, is nothing more, or less, than an act of dissociating oneself from those cultures that would call you by your birth name. And, by extension, a complete dissociation from ways of organising experience that no longer appear to apply to our own perceived experience of the world.
Perhaps the best advice could be that, just as it takes time to transition the physical attributes of our perceived identity, so also we should take time to transition out of our old persona and into the new.