NOT " uninterested pig" I just think Im asking alot today....
anyway.......
Like, wanted a man and were attracted to them?
I love my wife and our relationship is AWESOME...I would hate to learn I was "hetero" after the process :-\
Well I added men to people I'm attracted too after HRT, But I still like women too'. For me it's more the person, but I do notice guys alot more now.
Beni
No changes for me. I always preferred men as sexual partners. (prefer but not exclusive to)
I was a bi-sexual before I started hormones. My initial preferences were for females, and guys as an appetizer or dessert when the mood struck me. There were only a few that I ever became intimate with, and they were more or less mentors/teachers.
After I was on full blown HRT for about 3 to 4 years, I could definitely feel a shift in my over all desires. Once I was no longer a member of the club, I viewed men, as women view them. I began to feel more and more hungry for one, and loved to be around them or near them, if they tweaked my interest. I still have great affinities for female relationships, but as close friends only.
I dated those few guys during transition, and even though they really liked me, they were not who I wanted to end up with. I never wanted to be in a lesbian relationship...although I did have one female partner for a while...she was Bi as well.
So yes, I did change preferences in a vague way...but, by not being a "hetero" I suppose my HRT influences count differently
You may interested to know, that while transitioning, my therapist warned me that I would probably end up with a man...My Core Identity test revealed I wasn't a lesbian...but, would be after SRS, a Hetero-woman with a man. He was right!
Oh! they think they are so smart... He was invited to my wedding years later, and shook my husbands hand, and congratulated him...
Wheres the "core identity" test at?
Quote from: Rita Irene on December 27, 2008, 10:13:51 PM
Wheres the "core identity" test at?
It was the first part of my initial patient contact with my gender-identity dealing psychologist. I took a whole battery of tests, prior to counseling...I know it was because I had a particularly stressed and different kind of childhood, than that of mainstream America...
My parents were also interviewed about my wishes...they were my legal guardians when I was still 21 years old. With reasons I posted else where here on this site...
I am not going to reveal the Doctors name here...He retired 5 years ago. As I recall, it was called the "Gender Identity Core Test".
i'm bi, so i doubt it will change much. i just can't see being with another man again though.
Rita, I hope I'm not overstepping anyone by adding my two cents.. I haven't experienced this so I could be completely wrong.. but I'm pretty sure that if you, right now, really love your wife and are attracted to women and everything.. that's not going to suddenly disappear or do a complete 180. If you wind up being attracted to guys, that wouldn't necessarily stop you from being attracted to girls as well. And even if you take a test that tells you something about yourself, your opinion is still the most important one. Tests can make mistakes. :)
I was straight before HRT, and I guess I still am. I am attracted to men now, but never before. Could be the wiring in my mind. But I am not opposed to dating another woman. But for a partner, I am more prone to be attracted to the person, not the gender. And because I am not opposed to dating a transperson, I guess that really makes me omnisexual.
Janet
Ive been on HRT a litttle over a year now and have no change. i am still totally into women. maybe even more than i was as well.
I also would say omnisexual before and after HRT, but when it comes to men I'm not really into the strong construction manly man types, I like the slightly femme long haired guys...soo yummy.... What am I thinking I'm committed to someone I shouldn't be thinking these thoughts. Thanks Rita gotta go take me a cold shower now. :)
I was absolutely straight (attracted to men) until well after transition/SRS though I never did anything about it. Afterward I came to realize I was omnisexual because I was at ease with myself.
I've always been 100% straight (pre-transition, pre-hrt, during-hrt, post-transition, post-SRS), meaning that I am attracted to men exclusively. I am not sexually/romantically attracted to women at all, have NEVER been with one, and I don't plan to. Additionally, I am one of those people who think that sexual orientation is innate, immutable, and personally I don't think that any amount of HRT could "change" it.
tink :icon_chick:
Quote from: almost,angie on December 28, 2008, 05:59:07 PM
Ive been on HRT a litttle over a year now and have no change. i am still totally into women. maybe even more than i was as well.
That's interesting. I have always just adored women and been strongly attracted to them. I actually had second thoughts about transitioning at one point, because the thought of losing that was like losing who I am, the idea really distressed me. But i went ahead anyway. As Angie said, I think I am even more attracted to other women now than I even was before. I think that's cos I "see" them better, from this side of the gender divide. As for men, I was never interested in men at all before (even though i was constantly being taken for a gay male) and now I do at least see what my straight gf's are on about, but i still don't want a man for myself.
I can only accurately speak for myself, but i suspect Tink is probably right, that it is inborn and immutable.
I have seen my attractions change, but I am not sure HRT had anything to do with it. I was on HRT for 7-8 years before I had sex with a guy. But I found that I really enjoyed it, and that looking at a cock on a man was just like appreciating my cock, so it seemed very reasonable.
I am still more attracted to women's bodies than male, but I have seen that for the right guy, and can enjoy sex without regard for genitalia.
^^ See, that's interesting to me, to hear someone else's experience, cos for me, I spent sooo long hating and wanting to get rid of my, er, twig n berries, that I can't imagine wanting to mess with anyone else's! Similarly, I spent a lot of my life trying desperately to get away from boys and men, and the last thing I want to do now is seek them out s'more. Ugh.
Yeah, I am very much leaning toward being a hetero woman.
My feelings for the male of the species have changed dramatically since I completed my transition. I am still very much in love with my partner, Pat, and she and I are committed to each other. But,we both look at guys now.
I still look at women, but with a much reduced erotic feeling. So I guess I'm bi now.
As others have mentioned here and in other threads, before transition, I would have been repulsed at the thought of having a man put his hands on me, and the whole idea of intercourse was no where near my top ten list.
Now...
Their rugged looks, their broad shoulders, their muscular bodies, um, yeah... I still don't find anything particularly interesting in the male genitalia, but a tight butt is really hot!
Sorry, I have to go take a cold shower now.
-Sandy
Quote from: KarenLyn on December 27, 2008, 09:30:56 PM
No changes for me. I always preferred men as sexual partners. (prefer but not exclusive to)
Same.
Reading people's experiences regarding this subject is interesting to me as well, for it only confirms what I suspect (and incidentally, I am talking about my own personal experience), that sexual orientation (or should I say... MY sexual orientation?) is innate and unchangeable. You see, boys were never kind to me when I was growing up; they were indeed very mean, so I sometimes I wonder why I have always been drawn to them (sexually speaking) and never "became" a lesbian or bi (pun intended).
As far as *that thing* is concerned, *sigh* I hated *it* on MY body, and consequently, I used to engage myself in these mental gymnastics and ignore *it* completely during sexual intimacy, meaning that I didn't touch *it* nor did I allow anyone to touch *it* or do things with *it*.
Now it's totally different up here (mentally, I mean), and thankfully I no longer have to engage myself in any of those mental games to be intimate with the man I love....but that is an entirely different topic that doesn't belong here, I think ;)
tink :icon_chick:
Quote from: Tink on December 28, 2008, 07:16:16 PM
I've always been 100% straight (pre-transition, pre-hrt, during-hrt, post-transition, post-SRS), meaning that I am attracted to men exclusively. I am not sexually/romantically attracted to women at all, have NEVER been with one, and I don't plan to. Additionally, I am one of those people who think that sexual orientation is innate, immutable, and personally I don't think that any amount of HRT could "change" it.
tink :icon_chick:
I'm with Tink here. I'm strictly heterosexual too and I don't support any notion that sexual orientation can be changed. It can be denied, or repressed, but not changed. And that's because it is what it is. It's the position of the psychological community that one's orientation is an internal reality that is simply part of someone's being. The sexual urge is something that is 'programed' into the psyche from early on.
Some say we're all born 'bisexual'. What a load of nonsense. Babies are not sexual, especially when they are going through developmental stages and learning how to eat, walk, talk, socialise and learn motor and coordination skills. I never remembered experiencing attraction as a baby or child, only during my adolescent and adult years! And those who say if you've at least had the thought, you are bi, well, how can they answer for 'most; or 'all' people? They can't. Absolutely impossible! How can they claim to know people's mind and hearts if they're not inside their head? I'd also like to add that if one is capable of becoming 'functionally bisexual', that is NOT a true bisexual orientation if s/he is not experiencing the feelings / attractions that define bisexuality. Makes perfect sense, but some are too immature in their thinking to own up the real truth.
Quote from: Leslie on December 31, 2008, 05:34:51 PM
Quote from: Tink on December 28, 2008, 07:16:16 PM
I've always been 100% straight (pre-transition, pre-hrt, during-hrt, post-transition, post-SRS), meaning that I am attracted to men exclusively. I am not sexually/romantically attracted to women at all, have NEVER been with one, and I don't plan to. Additionally, I am one of those people who think that sexual orientation is innate, immutable, and personally I don't think that any amount of HRT could "change" it.
tink :icon_chick:
I'm with Tink here. I'm strictly heterosexual too and I don't support any notion that sexual orientation can be changed. It can be denied, or repressed, but not changed. And that's because it is what it is. It's the position of the psychological community that one's orientation is an internal reality that is simply part of someone's being. The sexual urge is something that is 'programed' into the psyche from early on.
Some say we're all born 'bisexual'. What a load of nonsense. Babies are not sexual, especially when they are going through developmental stages and learning how to eat, walk, talk, socialise and learn motor and coordination skills. I never remembered experiencing attraction as a baby or child, only during my adolescent and adult years! And those who say if you've at least had the thought, you are bi, well, how can they answer for 'most; or 'all' people? They can't. Absolutely impossible! How can they claim to know people's mind and hearts if they're not inside their head? I'd also like to add that if one is capable of becoming 'functionally bisexual', that is NOT a true bisexual orientation if s/he is not experiencing the feelings / attractions that define bisexuality. Makes perfect sense, but some are too immature in their thinking to own up the real truth.
I wonder then how you can claim (not being in everyone's heads) that sexuality is immutable for other people and that they are only deluding themselves.
Some people's sexual preference is very strongly set (such as yours or our resident Fairy Princess' or even mine), but for others it certainly feels more fluid. I've known such people.
Don't know, I think that whole thing about others being "too immature" to accept the truth is actually something quite immature to say.
Not sure here i may be the strange brew here but i have always hated my thang and never wanted another near me. I also thought i would only want a so called GG genetic woman before transitioning,,, (if thats real) but i found i love me so now i love other like me. be they male or female i have an attraction to both FTM's and MTF's who are full time and passable and who love themselves. However, i do not like those who are like me being TS who are sexually crazed. I need and desire true love and that takes time as two people grow together so yes i have been single and alone for over 10 yrs now and i am in no hurry to just do it with anybody.. However, i have many wet dreams and if i have a feeling that something real might happen i can find myself soaking wet but its been a few yrs since i have had that happen because i have been fooled by TS's who say they want love while just really wanting to hop in the sack with me. So alas i wait and i am now a 10 yr old who has grown and matured and has a sense of self that she loves and respects.. Yet its hard to find another with this kind of self love and self respect to have a fully healthy relationship with.
PS: I have tried writing men but as soon as they responded i had to admit i just liked them as people and was totally turned off to them sexually. I also have lost most of my attraction to so called GG's not sure why but i have..
EDITED TO ADD: Whats funny is i am listed as the liberated lover here = Based on the results of this test, it is highly likely that:
You prefer your romance and love to wild and daring rather than typical or boring, you would rather pursue than be pursued and, when it comes to physical love, your satisfaction comes more from providing a wonderful time to your partner than simply seeking your own.
This places you in the Lover Style of: The Liberated Lover.
The Liberated Lover is a wonderful Lover Style, and forms the kind of free-thinking, sexually-exciting, self-confident lover that society once condemned but that a liberal-mind cherishes and exults. The Liberated Lover is a treasure to find, though it can sometimes be difficult to do so because they are often already engaged in relationships or are in high-demand if "in the market."
In terms of physical love, the Liberated Lover is possibly the most thrilling and demanding of all, with the one potential drawback being that it is possible to feel 'overmatched' at times by their prowess and selfless giving. Given trust and understanding, and the right lover, the Liberated Lover can be a delight in bed.
Best Compatibility can probably be found with: The Exotic Lover (most of all) or the Carnal Lover, or the Suave Lover.
http://www.helloquizzy.com/results/the-lover-style-profile-test/?fromCGI=1&var_partner%2bfocus=16&var_aggressiveness=14&var_adventurousness=12 (http://www.helloquizzy.com/results/the-lover-style-profile-test/?fromCGI=1&var_partner%2bfocus=16&var_aggressiveness=14&var_adventurousness=12)
We are a diverse and multi-functional group. Some of us hate our born genitalia, others of us love it. Some of us are attracted to our same sex after transition, others of us are attracted to the opposite sex. Some of us do not have SRS and are happy without it, others of us are miserable unless we can have it, and others of us have had it and are very happy, and others of us have had SRS and are still miserable.
To say that one way is the only way is to say that there is only one way to get from my house to the Mall across the City.
Please let us be respectful of others, especially when their way might be different from yours?
OK?
Quote from: soldierjane on December 31, 2008, 05:54:48 PM
I wonder then how you can claim (not being in everyone's heads) that sexuality is immutable for other people and that they are only deluding themselves. Some people's sexual preference is very strongly set (such as yours or our resident Fairy Princess' or even mine), but for others it certainly feels more fluid. I've known such people.
Don't know, I think that whole thing about others being "too immature" to accept the truth is actually something quite immature to say.
I was talking about the people who say that 'everyone' is born bisexual. I'm really sick of this dumb logic that everybody swings both ways. Attraction (emotion / mind) is a nontangible energy that cannot be measured so how can they conclude anything without getting into each and every person's head that we're all bisexual? I bet dollars to donuts it's immature tweens and teens, and maybe some ignorant adults who are saying this because I don't believe for one minute that an intelligent, mature, educated person would make such a sweeping generalisation about the population as a whole.
What's even crazier are those who say that everybody is 'functionally bisexual'! So basically what they are trying to say (or at least what I'm trying to interpret) is that even if one is NOT attracted to both sexes in any way, shape or form, they are bisexual anyway if they are at least capable of it. That's implying potential, which means nothing unless acted upon. It's like saying a window washer is a rock climber simply because the potential is there. This example can also be used for bisexuality. According to their warped thinking, a person is bisexual if the potential is there. Totally false! They can use the stupid potential argument all they want, but if one is not wired to be bi, they will never be bi!
Functional bisexuality has nothing to do with emotional (mind-based) attractions stemming from the brain. A non-bisexual person may be able to position him/herself in a bisexual scenario from a mechanical standpoint but if the dual attraction is not felt from the deepest, inner core of their being, they are not bisexual!
So although I've never lusted after women in my life, according to these shallow brains, I'm bisexual? What a joke. I know I'm not lying to myself. And if they think so, that's their problem. Maybe they should worry about their own lives which must be empty and miserable. why, oh, why does it concern them so much who is bisexual and who is not? It's none of their business. They are dumber than a bunch of bricks & I stand by that notion. Sorry but it needs to be said.
I disagree with some of that, and have responded on the other thread that you have linked to.
;D
Blanche- You do not need to feel threatened by who I am. I accept you just as you are, it is just that I believe I have the right to self-identify as I wish just as you do.
I have been living as a woman for 7 years and have had every surgery under the sun except SRS.
And I love my penis and feel very comfortable with it. The TSs who hate their genitalia are my dear sisters and I love them and they love me.
Let us not build walls. Love is the answer to everything.
I used to be attracted to women but the only reason I think I was actually with them was out of intense jealousy, and the need to be close to them in a way I could only be if also GG. It was difficult otherwise to get past the casual friend stage and into close friend status. It's funny how they always initiated physical activity. I always wondered if I was bi because I would fantasize about men, but something about it didn't fit and I was rarely attracted to any non-imaginary men until a few years ago. Once I acknowledged my jealousy of women and that I might actually be TS it all made sense, and I got that closeness (friendship) from women that I had wanted, and no longer desired to be with them, infact the thought makes me sick. The only thing the hormones did was to help spark that tingly feeling when I look at a cute guy now. So you could say I'm innately Bi, or that I was repressed but straight (the one I agree with), or that I'm currently a repressed lesbian....but WTF really knows lol.
I don't think you change in your mind as such, I remember when I was going thru transition I wasn't thinking of men or women, I was so caught up in my own gender issues, when my transition was nearly complete I did notice getting a lot of male attention, I then felt this attraction to guys, particularly after srs, I remember my very first BF, feeling the butterflys in my stomach, I now know Im a woman who wants that perfect guy, hold me, give me flowers and look after me.
p
Quote from: Blanche on January 01, 2009, 10:57:01 AM
Nope you can identify as an eggplant for all I care. Just dont include ME with you. I don' wanna be like you. I"m NOT like you in any way shape or form so don't imply you're like me. Is that too much to ask from the "non-ops" like you and the moderator named Nichole. Don' think so. I just don' wanna be thought of as "your group" thats all. I am not LIKE you and you arent LIKE ME. thats all there is to it. Dont want anything to do with you. Pure and simple. thats my right. Ok?
Why are you here then? This forum has a diverse mix of trans people, and many of us appreciate that aspect, I certainly do. I've learned a lot by listening to and attempting to understand different viewpoints. Perhaps you'd be happier at a forum where there aren't any of "us" around.
respectfully,
Z
I never liked sex and never had a memorable experience even though I have two children. Neither male or female sexually excite me. People are gross and smelly especially without cloths. It is like kissing a toilet. I prefer people at least arm's length.
lesbian till death ;D
HRT changing sexual orientation = myth. (I think they busted it on Mythbusters)
Quote from: Leslie on January 01, 2009, 01:02:08 AM
Quote from: soldierjane on December 31, 2008, 05:54:48 PM
I wonder then how you can claim (not being in everyone's heads) that sexuality is immutable for other people and that they are only deluding themselves. Some people's sexual preference is very strongly set (such as yours or our resident Fairy Princess' or even mine), but for others it certainly feels more fluid. I've known such people.
Don't know, I think that whole thing about others being "too immature" to accept the truth is actually something quite immature to say.
I was talking about the people who say that 'everyone' is born bisexual. I'm really sick of this dumb logic that everybody swings both ways. Attraction (emotion / mind) is a nontangible energy that cannot be measured so how can they conclude anything without getting into each and every person's head that we're all bisexual? I bet dollars to donuts it's immature tweens and teens, and maybe some ignorant adults who are saying this because I don't believe for one minute that an intelligent, mature, educated person would make such a sweeping generalisation about the population as a whole.
What's even crazier are those who say that everybody is 'functionally bisexual'! So basically what they are trying to say (or at least what I'm trying to interpret) is that even if one is NOT attracted to both sexes in any way, shape or form, they are bisexual anyway if they are at least capable of it. That's implying potential, which means nothing unless acted upon. It's like saying a window washer is a rock climber simply because the potential is there. This example can also be used for bisexuality. According to their warped thinking, a person is bisexual if the potential is there. Totally false! They can use the stupid potential argument all they want, but if one is not wired to be bi, they will never be bi!
Functional bisexuality has nothing to do with emotional (mind-based) attractions stemming from the brain. A non-bisexual person may be able to position him/herself in a bisexual scenario from a mechanical standpoint but if the dual attraction is not felt from the deepest, inner core of their being, they are not bisexual!
So although I've never lusted after women in my life, according to these shallow brains, I'm bisexual? What a joke. I know I'm not lying to myself. And if they think so, that's their problem. Maybe they should worry about their own lives which must be empty and miserable. why, oh, why does it concern them so much who is bisexual and who is not? It's none of their business. They are dumber than a bunch of bricks & I stand by that notion. Sorry but it needs to be said.
Bravo! Leslie; Well put...every word of it! Yes," By George ", I think this girl has got it...quite admirable thinking...
Maybe it's too early to say... (I've only been on T for a few weeks) but so far things haven't changed. In fact I was watching this commercial the other day, for this exercise dohickey, for women to develop their pecs, to "firm and lift the bust line". The whooole commercial was just breasts. So, I'm watching it, aware that some people experience shifts in orientation after HRT, feeling absolutely nothing, and I just think to myself "Wow. I am sooooooooo gay." :D
I am post-op and I have always preferred the company of other women, especially for sex and intimacy. That has not changed. I am post-op M to F.
Wing Walker
I was born asexual & nothing can change that! I'm post-operative too.
In answer to the question: no.
Well Tink I beleive you have the most wonderful man anyone could hope or dream of having, lucky gal ;D
Well my experience as a kid was pretty well the same a you with other boys. and I was pretty well a loner for my adolescent years until I grew up where I actually was just as much at home with guy friends and women friends as well, usually just as much friends to their wives.
The sexual thing was always awkward and it didn't feel right and it took one abusive relationship and wrecked a second relationship because I couldn't perform or provide what my second mate wanted. So that ended the second relationship and after many years of alcoholic drinking, lets say a long stroll in around the block in the fog I came up for fresh air to discover that I could admire one sex just as equally as I could the other but was not interested in having physical sex with either.
Some time later I discovered who I was and met another TS here on Susan's chat 7 years ago. She also a survivor of physical and mental abuse. We got together 5 years ago and been living together for the past four years. We are both post-op there is much love and intimacy between us but nothing one could call any interest sexually. Maybe that will change in time but it is not realy a big deal at this time in our lives. So I don't really know what one would label our relationship except that we love each other and at this time it has nothing to do with physical sex.
Cindy