Im in ROTC so
I cant have long hair during the school year
and I cant have my ears pierced
until I get out 

I do not know what ROTC is, but fair enough. In that case get the gender therapist on your side.

I don't think you will get away with being in the ROTC and transitioning.  You will have to make choices eventually. I suppose you could get yourself some nice wigs in the meantime, but things cost money so you may have to find some after school work. With a little extra money you will be able to buy some nice outfits too.

Quote from: ShaunaNinjagirl on September 16, 2012, 01:35:55 PM
I don't think you will get away with being in the ROTC and transitioning.  You will have to make choices eventually.

I know
so I have decided that this is most likely my last year in ROTC

Quote from: brc on September 16, 2012, 01:12:44 PM
I do not know what ROTC is, but fair enough. In that case get the gender therapist on your side.

Reserve Officer Training Corps. Though at her age its probably JROTC which is essentially a dumbed down version for high schoolers as an elective alternative to physical education. Its suppose to teach leadership and good citizenship. I did it myself for the minimum two years before I ended up switching to cooking class.

Actual ROTC (which I also did) is a college level military program alternative to Officer Candidate School or military academies. When they graduate the students are commissioned as officers in their branch.

Me has a question for you
why is it every time I see lesbians
it triggers me and I start feeling down

Quote from: zelda on September 20, 2012, 06:24:47 PM
Me has a question for you
why is it every time I see lesbians
it triggers me and I start feeling down

Are you attracted to girls?

I had this kind of obsession / misery thing with gay girls. I wanted to be one of them, I hated that I wasn't. I turned out pretty queer.

yes
and I dont like when people say gay girls
because I think guys are be gay
and girl are be lesbians

Jealousy is natural.  Before I transitioned I was jealous that I may of never had a love that pure and beautiful  but when I transitioned it found me 

Being treated like the lady I am 

my dads on the site now and posting stuff
I dont know if thats good or bad
I hope its good
because I cry myself to sleep ever night over the issue

Quote from: zelda on September 22, 2012, 10:01:58 PM
my dads on the site now and posting stuff
I dont know if thats good or bad
I hope its good
because I cry myself to sleep ever night over the issue

I don't know, but if he is at all like his daughter Zelda, and listens as well as speaks, he will learn a great deal about the challenges of your world and the wonderful potential you have with the right support. The fact that he is trying to learn, that sounds like a very good thing. I hope it is.

I think he is more trying to figure out how to understand me
more than anything else right now
I think at the moment tho he only see the hardship of the bad more than the potencal

Quote from: zelda on September 23, 2012, 05:19:40 PM
I think he is more trying to figure out how to understand me
more than anything else right now
I think at the moment tho he only see the hardship of the bad more than the potencal

That is hard Zelda, but you can be proud that you have made a start, and are sharing your feelings and needs and problems instead of keeping them all inside. You can also be proud of him that he is trying. You have both made a good start I think.

Part of the great thing about being a woman, is expressing your feelings and needs and problems. It is what we do. It is how we get help, and how we are able to help each other. It is a form of intelligence that we can foster and improve; it helps us connect and form bonds.

It is natural for your parent to want to protect you from hurt in this world. When he understands that your living as someone you are not, hurts you more that anything the world can do to you for living as yourself, he may become your strongest advocate. That takes time for a parent to make such a big change, when he has only just begun to know his daughter. Keep the faith and take great care of yourself.
Hugs,
Maddie

Quote from: zelda on September 22, 2012, 10:01:58 PM
my dads on the site now and posting stuff
I dont know if thats good or bad
I hope its good
because I cry myself to sleep ever night over the issue

Hi daddy    If you have any questions just ask away. 

@Zelda: Must warn him some of us(me) are a bit crazy.

he would think we are all crazy
even me

me sorry for asking about personal life but are any of you married
If the question is bad tell me and Ill erase it

Quote from: zelda on September 25, 2012, 08:11:46 PM
me sorry for asking about personal life but are any of you married
If the question is bad tell me and Ill erase it

No, that's not a bad question. I've been married six years to a wonderful woman. We've been together a year since I came out and started transitioning, five months of that full time. Since you are young, you will probably transition before you meet someone you would want to marry. I recommend it since transitioning can be very hard on a marriage and on your spouse.
There are quite a few MTF women who married good men after they transitioned, as well as some like me who married a good woman before transitioning. Because of the laws against same sex marriage in many places, other happy couples have to settle for domestic partnerships.

please talk
me always need someone to talk to
I get worse when I dont talk to you guys

Me is married to the same guy for 6 years. It is wonderful. He always shows me a good time meow 

Quote from: zelda on September 29, 2012, 08:35:46 PM
please talk
me always need someone to talk to
I get worse when I dont talk to you guys

Hi zelda sweetie. Always glad to hear from you! Please feel free to read and post on the other parts of the forum too, and those times that you just need someone to talk to, you can head over to Susan's chat: https://www.susans.org/chat/index.html I'm chat-challenged myself, but its a nice place when you don't want to be alone. There's almost always at least one chat moderator on, who are nice people that are always glad to talk with you.

So Zelda, tell me what is going on with you? Are you in school right now? Do you have any brothers and sisters, or are you the only one at home? Is it just your dad, or do you also live with you mom? Have you thought about what you want to study or what you want to do for a career? Have you had any luck in arranging to see a therapist yet?

Some threads at Susan's that are nice to post to when you are feeling alone include:
What made you happy today 2.0?
What made you unhappy today? v2.0
What are you thinking right now? 2.0