When referring to someone as a homo, that moron has simply just confirmed that the person being spoken about is simply a member of the human species.

Quote from: Shantel on October 05, 2012, 12:18:12 PM
When referring to someone as a homo, that moron has simply just confirmed that the person being spoken about is simply a member of the human species.

It's the intention, not the true meaning, that hurts.
The moron knows this. Regardless if they understand the origin of the word or not.
Disarming a moron is simple. Just agree with them.
'Yes I am'. They have just lost their best weapon, a word that hurts.
Now they have to think.
You are at the crossroads.

Ativan

I think it's easier to count the times I've been seen as manly than gay.

I've spent my whe life being seen as gay, no matter what I did to not be seen that way. Names like, '->-bleeped-<-', 'queerboy', or 'Gay Gnome', were a regular insult to me growing up.
Even my parents would ask if I was gay. I've been beaten many times because I was seen as gay.
Needless to say that when I came out as trans, there weren't too many who were surprised. My ex-girlfriend from high school said that when she found out, the pieces to the puzzle just fell into place.

Now that I'm A woman, people see me as just another girl.
My sister, Jannie, once said to me, " it's funny how you try to be butch, but you're not."
I think she is right, but I'm not a girly girl either.

I was called all kind of bad thing in daily basis between the ages of 6 to 12 years. After that nobody has said anything to my face, and if they do, hum, retribution will be in kind

Quote from: Ativan Prescribed on October 05, 2012, 01:23:44 PM
It's the intention, not the true meaning, that hurts.
The moron knows this. Regardless if they understand the origin of the word or not.
Disarming a moron is simple. Just agree with them.
'Yes I am'. They have just lost their best weapon, a word that hurts.
Now they have to think.
You are at the crossroads.

Ativan

That's called verbal judo or something like that, yes it does work even on morons!

true, that works. how glad wasn't i the day i figured it out...

easiest way to make sure you're able to disarm any stranger is to know all the offending words that may apply to yourself and simply admit that you're that too. i've taken back all the words currently classified as derogatory about my race/ethnicity, by calling myself with these words nobody can offend me in the least by using them. i also got used to being called bitch and creep because of two really cute guys who use them differently from what people usually do

but oddly enough, i still can't get used to "girl". maybe because this is one of the things that i am not, so i doesn't feel so nice when i'm called it. except from on those few days when i am one after all

Or you can drive them crazy with the other correct definitions of some the terms. 

I always thought it was odd that I have been called the "girly" slurs over time, but cant ever recall being called "gay"

And I have always been gay friendly, and usually that alone would get you teased back in the 70's...I just cant explain it

Quote from: Shantel on October 05, 2012, 05:05:42 PM
That's called verbal judo or something like that, yes it does work even on morons!

Taekwonwordo , morons are defenseless against it.

But please don't hurt the morons, they may not be able to help it.
Sometimes they are just mimicking those who hate.
They are being used by the bullies.

It works quite well on those who should know better.
Their fears light up when they have to stop and think.

Ativan

I'm sure that people probably think I'm a lesbian or something, but I've never heard any of it. A friend says that I have a "a straight aura," but I don't really know what that means. 

The most relevant incident that comes to mind is prom. Usually, I wear jeans and T-shirts and more boy-ish/nerdy ones at that. So, when I showed up to prom, all dolled up and make-uped, a friend said "You look like a girl!" And that put a slight damper on the evening. 

Quote from: hazelspikes on October 08, 2012, 01:45:06 PM
I'm sure that people probably think I'm a lesbian or something, but I've never heard any of it. A friend says that I have a "a straight aura," but I don't really know what that means. 

The most relevant incident that comes to mind is prom. Usually, I wear jeans and T-shirts and more boy-ish/nerdy ones at that. So, when I showed up to prom, all dolled up and make-uped, a friend said "You look like a girl!" And that put a slight damper on the evening. 

Hah, that's so funny! I get that all the time because though I'm a developed MtF I present in jeans, T-shirt and baseball cap most of the time. We're opposite sides of the same fence Hazelspikes! 

Quote from: Sarah7 on October 04, 2012, 01:39:25 PM
Purple is the best colour in the world.

So very true 

For me it was usually bitch, dyke or she-male and I never bothered counting. Waste of my time.

Quote from: Shantel on October 08, 2012, 02:04:50 PM
Hah, that's so funny! I get that all the time because though I'm a developed MtF I present in jeans, T-shirt and baseball cap most of the time. We're opposite sides of the same fence Hazelspikes! 

Hahahah high five! 
So, we meet in a clearing somewhere in the forest. Yay!

Probably about as much as everyone else. Nobody knows about me.

Hmm.. Until the last two years, I had that "straight aura" around me, and that association was the one that really hurt. I can be many things, but sexually I'm so very, very far from being straight that it made everything awkward and uncomfortable.

But been called straight has at times been funny, too. Recently one person joked that I "act straight only when drunk". When I started thinking about how wrong that sentence was on so many levels, the whole thing just felt ridiculous - it'd be more true to say I act on my gay instincts mostly only when drunk.

Other than that, I've not been called names much. Maybe I will, soon - I kind of stand out nowadays with my clothing and all. I call myself queer and don't recognize that as an insult. Some people have started to think I'm butch, and that I can live with. After cutting my hair one lesbian friend commented "you have such a lesbian haircut now..." and that left me with mixed feelings. It seems some people think I've found an identity as a lesbian and try to act like one by dressing in laddish clothes... And I can't really blame them, it's a lot rarer to meet an androgyne trying to look more like themself than a newly-found lesbian wanting to look butch, after all.

Quote from: Phoeniks on October 09, 2012, 11:07:53 AM
I can't really blame them, it's a lot rarer to meet an androgyne trying to look more like themself than a newly-found lesbian wanting to look butch, after all.

Or an MtF just wanting to present androgyne and not be stuffed in some other box for the sake of the onlooker's comfort! Hang in there Phoeniks, it gets better as self assurance sets in and is projected outwardly that quietly says, "I could give a rat's a** what you think!" 

Quote from: big kim on October 09, 2012, 02:21:54 AM
When i was a bus driver I refused to let a guy on the bus as it was full he called me an Fing dyke,I told him he should get his facts right before coming out with statements like that and I am bi sexual.The whole load of passengers laughed their asses off at him which got him mad.

The best advice I ever read about gender, I think it has a lot to do with presentation or how a person will be perceived.
I think it applies just as well to a person's orientation.
This is always in the back of my mind when I start to have doubts about myself and how I am perceived.
(one of the many pearls of wisdom I have read from others here.)

Gender has no meaning or value if it is counterfeit.
Counterfeit gender is just a game, a trick, an amusement,
an act, a fraud, a deception, an imitation, artificial, bogus.

Be yourself, not a gender.
Being yourself is effortless and genuine.
Being yourself is REAL, not counterfeit.
In being yourself, in behaving in a manner which is natural to you,
whatever gender you are becomes self-evident.

-Emerald

Just trying to be me, not an orientation, not a presentation, not a gender.
Just non-binary, like I am.
Ativan

Quote from: Ativan Prescribed on October 09, 2012, 02:27:37 PM

Just trying to be me, not an orientation, not a presentation, not a gender.
Just non-binary, like I am.
Ativan

Great post Ativan, so true!