I didn't want to teal someone else's thread about losing weight, so I started my own.   I can't lose any weight.  I tried seeing a dietician, which may help some.  She got me eating more whole wheat items and cut back on sugar drinks by getting Crystal light drinks. .  But I can't stay away from sodas and chips and other TASTY foods.  My self esteem has always been low and negative that I can't get out of the "what's the use" rut.  I am seeing a therapist ( my 4th or 5th one) and they can't get me out of the hole I have lived in all my life.   
        I have tried looking at the pretty clothes that I have and can't fit in for incentives with no luck.  I have tried eating more fruits and fibers as well as wheat items.   I hate the taste of diet foods.  The portion sizing doesn't work for me either.  I hate exercise by myself and am uncomfortable at a gym.  I am not overly fat but I do hat a gut.  I am 5-9, 180+ right now.  I do feel ugly with my gut.

I don't want anyone's pity.   I give eniough of that to myself.  I just wanted to vent some of it here.  thank you for listening.


       I am not looking for pity   

You gotta burn off more than you take in. I walk my dog like crazy. And water has lots of health benefits. Hugs, Devlyn

I can give you a little advise on sodas or pop as they call it in my neck of the woods.  Let me preface this by saying that I used to drink at least six cans a day at one point and I still love the stuff.  The big killer in trying to drop the pops is the caffeine withdrawals.  When I gave up the sweet caffeiney goodness I had skull splitting headaches for a solid two and a half weeks, day and night.  When you do give it up I suggest taking Excedrin for the headaches.  It has a little caffeine in it and it will work wonders.  After that it is just will power my friend.  I would first start with juice, then water with something it if for flavor, and they simple cold water.  Cold water from the refrigerator seems to work better the just cold tap water.  Once you have broken free of caffeine's dastardly clutches then you can have one or two a week and you will be just fine.  Just don't relapse into drinking it all the time but, if you do just keep that bottle of Excedrin near by.     

Moderation is key.

Everything is fine in moderation

I was actually reading something that other day that was relevant to this.  What it said made good sense and might give you hope.

Our intestines are home to a great many bacteria - of many different types and variety (is that redundant?).  When you eat a certain diet (ie junk food), those bacteria proliferate and send signals to the brain (yes the bacteria does this!) that trigger reward (ie pleasure) response.  So eating these foods that THEY want makes you feel good in the head (while making you feel like crap in the rest of your body).  When you try to change your diet to something healthier, those same bacteria that thrive on sugar and junk food begin to starve and die and will send signals to the brain trying to drive you to feed them the food they want.  You need them to die off and/or go dormant.  You want the bacteria that thrive on healthy foods to grow and take over your gut.  That takes time - time for them to establish a connection with your brain and time for them to dominate and drown out those old bacteria.

I recently went through this.  I switched my diet to mostly vegan, cutting out all junk food and meat (except for fish sometimes).  At first, eating salad every day, a couple times a day was tough.  it took a lot of mental willpower.  After a few weeks (yes weeks) it became much easier and I actually started enjoying the taste quite a bit! I'm nearly 40 and have NEVER liked salad.  Suddenly I'm enjoying it and when I have tried non-healthy foods, I don't receive the same level of "reward" that I used to.  I've always been somewhat healthy though so it wasn't a huge transition for me, but it was still tough.

My suggestion?  Start with ONE THING to change.  Put down the burger and start eating a salad.  give yourself something to hold onto while your body and gut adjusts the change (ie don't quit the soda yet).  Once you've adjusted to that one thing, and are enjoying it, you'll find it easier to change the next thing, and then the next.

Remember it takes at least 21 days to create a new habit - but like 90 days to reprogram an old habit.

Good luck!

   I have tried eating more salads and fruits.  I give in to the wants that my body demands.  I have no will power to beat the sugar fix I crave.  Kind of like an addict that can't stay clean.   All I see are my setbacks and the weight  loss I have not achieved.  I believe it is all tied in to my low self esteem and how I feel about my self and my life.

Quote from: Diane Elizabeth on October 18, 2012, 09:24:58 PM"what's the use" rut.  I am seeing a therapist ( my 4th or 5th one) and they can't get me out of the hole I have lived in all my life.   

There are lots of ways to slim down, from famine to Weight Watchers to surgery, some good, some bad.  That is not the problem.

Work on the rut, stay with it on the therapy, make that your priority, then the other stuff like slimming down will follow.

That's my opinion on it. 

Quote from: Diane Elizabeth on October 19, 2012, 06:13:47 AM
   I have tried eating more salads and fruits.  I give in to the wants that my body demands.  I have no will power to beat the sugar fix I crave.  Kind of like an addict that can't stay clean.   All I see are my setbacks and the weight  loss I have not achieved.  I believe it is all tied in to my low self esteem and how I feel about my self and my life.

For me it was the sugar cravings as well.  I tried the South Beach diet, and while I still get some of the cravings, I'm able to stave them off with low-cal soda most of the time.  I was addicted to the sugars and carbs, but I like meat, so I was able to swap out some of the pasta/cereals for meat. 

I drink diet Cherry Pepsi, diet Mt Dew (which is not zero-cal), and a home-made brew of green tea sweetened with truvia.  The GT/Truvia honestly helps the most with soda cravings, and the two diet sodas are only used for special occasions.  The "replacement" principle is very important!  If you're trying to get rid of something bad that you crave, try to replace it with something good that helps alleviate the cravings!

Like generous4 said, there are lots of ways to lose weight.  Just like there is no "one-gender-fits-all", there is no diet that fits everybody.  You are worth finding out what works for you!

Until you decide you HAVE to make this change, you never will..  I just recently started dieting and have shed 10 lbs in a 2 week span simply from dropping fried foods off the menu and counting calories....  simply counting them really is an eye opener.. you can eat till you're overflowing if you're eating low calorie stuff.  I've been eating nice full portions of food every meal and still a lot of things I like and have always ate... but now I just know what to avoid, considering they are insanely high calories... (pasta)


Try stuff like chicken caesar wraps, grilled chicken sandwiches, chef salad with orange juice squeezed over it instead of dressing, whole grains, broccoli, celery, PICKLES!  (mmmm since HRT, I love the little bastages)  Just be mindful of how many calories certain foods are and it can and will change your perspective on things... I still eat sweet treats when I get a craving... but they are the bite sizes instead of bowls....  just to curb the craving.


Try it and tell me what you think...  Oh and this, from a 5'9" 190+ with the same problems up until two weeks ago!

If you struggle with diets do what I did. Slowly change your lifestyle. 1 thing at a time. For example cutting down sugar in your coffee till its gone. Replace 1 thing every month with a healthier alternative. Slowly work towards eating healthy meals 3 times a day, but do it 1 meal at time. Once you have normalised to each change (read its habit and you not feeling like your forcing yourself, move on the next one). It gains momentum and now I don't have to think about it. Most of the time I don't want to eat any sort of junk food anymore as like has been said the "reward" factor is gone.

Also once you get to the losing weight portion of the exercise (yes you don't start losing weight right away) you can goto www.myfitnesspal.com to track your calorie intake. Thats basically what I use to lose weight instead of any restrictive dieiting.